Elisabeth Kluber-Ross developed a brilliant model that has become a psycho-analytical tool for evaluating the various stages of grief accompanying the manifestation of loss in the deep recess of the human mind. Faced with a turbulent event or scenery, a persona begins to experience overwhelming emotions deeply rooted in a perceived loss or malignant fate. At the core of this process, the human mind transverses certain stages of emotional wavelengths that, put together, form the basis of experiencing intense sorrow, which is sometimes self-inflicted or self-induced.

The disposition to gravitate from one stage to another within this hypothetical ladder is the foundation upon which the Kluber-Ross model was built. Needless to say, human beings are social animals; the society wherein we relate often plays a crucial role in our psychological well-being. The tendency for a person to exhibit clearly identified patterns of behaviour becomes clearer when the object of study has been analysed to the point of understanding the rationality behind his or her evident irrationality. This irrationality often results in a caprice for the sufferer as he or she commutes from the originating point of mis-action to the latter stages, owing to a perception borne out of a desire to be logical, albeit in an illogical manner.

The 2023 elections have come and gone; however, Nigerians are still glued to a season of euphemistic syllogism, thanks to one section of the populace who seem to have developed a knack for online vampirism, perhaps suffering from Renfield’s syndrome. However, when one goes deep to analyse these overly aberrant behaviours, the only conclusion to arrive at is that the afore-mentioned strata of individuals are deeply entrenched in various stages of grief, as purported by Elizabeth Kluber-Ross. Grief as we know, is never easy to overcome, especially when the object of the sufferer’s fixation makes him or her emotionally downcast and unable to accept reality.

DENIAL
Denial is a defence mechanism that is initiated as a means to temporarily avoid the pain of a loss. The feeling of denial started with the erroneous belief that there is a Saint amongst the pool of candidates vying for the nation’s highest elective position. Being the first stage of grief, denial confers on the sufferer the inability to comprehend the reality of the situation. The refusal to compare the achievements of two former governors vying for the presidency position is a symptomatic codification of harbouring denial. In trying to defend the indefensible, we hear stories of how one governor was opportune to govern a state with economic prosperity, and the other was unlucky. However, the proponents of such maladious comments failed to understand that the perceived unlucky one was the governor of a state with great potential to be economically great. Give Anambra of 2007 to a visionary leader, and the story would not be the same in fifteen years. Unfortunately, the grief sufferers were never ready to accept any alternative viewpoints that point to the shortcomings of their political deity. All through the campaigning process, they exhibited a vehement refusal to accept any negative information or criticism about him. However, the denials will continue, evoking strong hostility towards anyone who holds on to such thoughts. However, what one cannot deny is the fact that Tinubu’s acute understanding of governance and politics. Pretending not to know the major inputs that Tinubu has contributed to the development of institutions in Lagos state is a gross showcase of denial that borders on the diagnosis of grief feelings. Rather than accept the reality of the electoral loss, the grief sufferers continue to look for a stolen mandate; this is funny coming from the supporters of a candidate who came a distant third.

ANGER
When emotions become accentuated by denials, anger sets in. Anger is a perfect response expected from one suffering from grief. Anger infuses the grief sufferer with fiery energy, often short-lived; at this stage, the sufferer begins to question everything, from the process that resulted in the loss to the bystanders and observers that were aloof while the loss situation pervaded. Anger can also stem from a strong attachment to an ideology or a personality so much that any criticism meted on such objects or subjects is personalised by the grief sufferer. The psychologist, Dr. Josell, noted that anger leads to the manifestation of blame. How on earth should a non-sitting politician be blamed for the woes of a country? Tinubu, upon leaving the seat of administration in Lagos, has guarded the state administration by presenting to the people of Lagos successive performers that have taken the state further away from being compared to any other state in Nigeria. The grief sufferers will not agree; they prefer to harp on the false belief that Tinubu sold Buhari to Nigerians. They forget that Buhari was sold to Nigerians by Tinubu and Saraki, Kwankwaso, Atiku and many others across the country. It is common to try to give a dog a bad name to hang it. That you are angry at police brutality does not justify attacks on someone else personal businesses; unless peradventure, it is the proceeds of such businesses that are used to pay the brutal policemen. When an individual suffers from grief, Dr. Josell said, the manner of anger exhibited becomes less sensible. Anger also leads to the exhibition of verbal invectives. From insulting a man’s old age to assassinating his character, the sufferers of grief left no stone unturned to let the whole world know they are not in their best mental states. The failure to accept fate led to the deployment of tirades to make the president-elect look less human. Anger is a useful tool for masking the grief sufferers’ emotions since it is far easier to exhibit madness rather than sit alone in profound sadness, to lick the wounds emanating from the loss.

BARGAINING
Bargaining as a stage of grief, is characterised by attempts to negotiate or seek compromise in order to change the outcome of an event. Since denial and anger could not make their dreams come true, the grief sufferers moved to the next stage on the ladder; bargaining. Bargaining provides an avenue for the grief sufferer to seek means of controlling the situation and the loss, in essence, struggling to negotiate a way out of the unfortunate situation. According to a professional counsellor, Tasha Holland-Kornegay (Ph.D.), the essence of bargaining is to prevent the expected outcome or loss. Bargaining presents a faint hope for the grief sufferer; in this case, instituting lawsuits and court proceedings to disenfranchise an already elected president from contesting in an election that has been won. In the case of their symbol, bargaining became eminent when, rather than present facts that he won the election, he embarked on a whirlwind journey of character assassination, churning out bovine vociferations all in a bid to persuade the election tribunal to disenfranchise an already elected president. To make the scenario more laughable, the grief sufferers went to the hills and the mountains, praying and cursing, telling a non-existent audience that the tribunal would give back a stolen mandate to the candidate that came third in a race; humour at its best. Perhaps, the grief sufferers believed that a wanton display of emotions was enough to sway the tribunal’s verdict to favour their ill-objectivist agenda to derail an electoral process that, although it may have had its flaw, provided a glimpse of an institution headed in the right direction.

DEPRESSION
When the reality of vanity in the choice of bargaining tool fails to work, the grief sufferers move to the stage of depression, a long-lasting sadness occasioned by the reality of the situation that the loss has come to stay. Fuelled by feelings of despondence, owing to the reality of the setbacks witnessed during the tribunal seatings, the grief sufferers become disillusioned by the knowledge that their personal investments in a failed political project is akin to someone who only succeeded in labouring in vain. The grief sufferers eventually begin to accept the reality of the loss, although this is accompanied by a high degree of psychological challenges. At this point, they come to terms with what to expect for the future. In the next four years, the grief sufferers are expected to despair about all moves and policies of the incoming administration. The sadness that overwhelms their mental systems will culminate in a lethargic and diminished joy, making it harder for them to see beyond their hate by objectively analysing the merits of every policy rolled out by the new administration whose leadership they have come to loath. Rather than embark on cognitive behavioural therapy to help them examine their thoughts and actions to regain control over their emotions, the depression will only fuel their angst as they continue to trivialise issues based on their ethereal exigencies. Emotions are often difficult to change since they are wired to the innermost parts of the brain; expecting the grief sufferers to adopt objectivity when analysing the new administration’s policies is equivalent to the biblical rendition of a camel passing through the eye of a needle.

ACCPETANCE
Eventually, one thing that cannot be changed is the fact that bearing an act of God or the occurrence of any uncontrollable event, the president-elect will steer the administration of the next four years in close synergy with the vice-president. It is expected that any sane individual, irrespective of the grief he or she might have passed through, should accept this reality and stabilise their emotions by kowtowing to the reality of the situation. The fog created by an extreme dislike for the persona occupying the highest leadership position of the country needs to be cleared for the grief sufferers to nurture positive thoughts about the country’s future, knowing well enough that thoughts or negativity will never replace the president with their perceived messiah. Acceptance, as a final stage of grief, opens the minds of the sufferer to the reality on the ground. Acceptance may also come from a matured understanding of the complexities of politics and the fact that democracy is deeply rooted in the majority’s choices and not in the choice of a minority that believe they are more patriotic than others. However, whether the grief sufferers choose to evolve into such a reality will determine how they fit into the new reality. For the ones that transit to this stage, a sense of calm will take over their being, and the new feeling gives them rest of mind and an avenue for forward thinking. Those who decide to domicile in the earlier stages of grief will only be doing themselves great psychological harm since they have no means of changing the reality on the ground. Grief is a process that must end with the sufferer accepting the reality of it and moving on. However, choosing to perpetually dwell on the loss will not let the grief go away, subsequently triggering floods of emotions that only accentuate the ill-mental health of the sufferer.

https://thepenparliament./2023/05/27/the-obidient-mentality-from-the-lens-of-kluber-ross-five-stages-of-grief/

lekkie073:
Elisabeth Kluber-Ross developed a brilliant model that has become a psycho-analytical tool for evaluating the various stages of grief accompanying the manifestation of loss in the deep recess of the human mind. Faced with a turbulent event or scenery, a persona begins to experience overwhelming emotions deeply rooted in a perceived loss or malignant fate. At the core of this process, the human mind transverses certain stages of emotional wavelengths that, put together, form the basis of experiencing intense sorrow, which is sometimes self-inflicted or self-induced.

The disposition to gravitate from one stage to another within this hypothetical ladder is the foundation upon which the Kluber-Ross model was built. Needless to say, human beings are social animals; the society wherein we relate often plays a crucial role in our psychological well-being. The tendency for a person to exhibit clearly identified patterns of behaviour becomes clearer when the object of study has been analysed to the point of understanding the rationality behind his or her evident irrationality. This irrationality often results in a caprice for the sufferer as he or she commutes from the originating point of mis-action to the latter stages, owing to a perception borne out of a desire to be logical, albeit in an illogical manner.

The 2023 elections have come and gone; however, Nigerians are still glued to a season of euphemistic syllogism, thanks to one section of the populace who seem to have developed a knack for online vampirism, perhaps suffering from Renfield’s syndrome. However, when one goes deep to analyse these overly aberrant behaviours, the only conclusion to arrive at is that the afore-mentioned strata of individuals are deeply entrenched in various stages of grief, as purported by Elizabeth Kluber-Ross. Grief as we know, is never easy to overcome, especially when the object of the sufferer’s fixation makes him or her emotionally downcast and unable to accept reality.

DENIAL
Denial is a defence mechanism that is initiated as a means to temporarily avoid the pain of a loss. The feeling of denial started with the erroneous belief that there is a Saint amongst the pool of candidates vying for the nation’s highest elective position. Being the first stage of grief, denial confers on the sufferer the inability to comprehend the reality of the situation. The refusal to compare the achievements of two former governors vying for the presidency position is a symptomatic codification of harbouring denial. In trying to defend the indefensible, we hear stories of how one governor was opportune to govern a state with economic prosperity, and the other was unlucky. However, the proponents of such maladious comments failed to understand that the perceived unlucky one was the governor of a state with great potential to be economically great. Give Anambra of 2007 to a visionary leader, and the story would not be the same in fifteen years. Unfortunately, the grief sufferers were never ready to accept any alternative viewpoints that point to the shortcomings of their political deity. All through the campaigning process, they exhibited a vehement refusal to accept any negative information or criticism about him. However, the denials will continue, evoking strong hostility towards anyone who holds on to such thoughts. However, what one cannot deny is the fact that Tinubu’s acute understanding of governance and politics. Pretending not to know the major inputs that Tinubu has contributed to the development of institutions in Lagos state is a gross showcase of denial that borders on the diagnosis of grief feelings. Rather than accept the reality of the electoral loss, the grief sufferers continue to look for a stolen mandate; this is funny coming from the supporters of a candidate who came a distant third.

ANGER
When emotions become accentuated by denials, anger sets in. Anger is a perfect response expected from one suffering from grief. Anger infuses the grief sufferer with fiery energy, often short-lived; at this stage, the sufferer begins to question everything, from the process that resulted in the loss to the bystanders and observers that were aloof while the loss situation pervaded. Anger can also stem from a strong attachment to an ideology or a personality so much that any criticism meted on such objects or subjects is personalised by the grief sufferer. The psychologist, Dr. Josell, noted that anger leads to the manifestation of blame. How on earth should a non-sitting politician be blamed for the woes of a country? Tinubu, upon leaving the seat of administration in Lagos, has guarded the state administration by presenting to the people of Lagos successive performers that have taken the state further away from being compared to any other state in Nigeria. The grief sufferers will not agree; they prefer to harp on the false belief that Tinubu sold Buhari to Nigerians. They forget that Buhari was sold to Nigerians by Tinubu and Saraki, Kwankwaso, Atiku and many others across the country. It is common to try to give a dog a bad name to hang it. That you are angry at police brutality does not justify attacks on someone else personal businesses; unless peradventure, it is the proceeds of such businesses that are used to pay the brutal policemen. When an individual suffers from grief, Dr. Josell said, the manner of anger exhibited becomes less sensible. Anger also leads to the exhibition of verbal invectives. From insulting a man’s old age to assassinating his character, the sufferers of grief left no stone unturned to let the whole world know they are not in their best mental states. The failure to accept fate led to the deployment of tirades to make the president-elect look less human. Anger is a useful tool for masking the grief sufferers’ emotions since it is far easier to exhibit madness rather than sit alone in profound sadness, to lick the wounds emanating from the loss.

BARGAINING
Bargaining as a stage of grief, is characterised by attempts to negotiate or seek compromise in order to change the outcome of an event. Since denial and anger could not make their dreams come true, the grief sufferers moved to the next stage on the ladder; bargaining. Bargaining provides an avenue for the grief sufferer to seek means of controlling the situation and the loss, in essence, struggling to negotiate a way out of the unfortunate situation. According to a professional counsellor, Tasha Holland-Kornegay (Ph.D.), the essence of bargaining is to prevent the expected outcome or loss. Bargaining presents a faint hope for the grief sufferer; in this case, instituting lawsuits and court proceedings to disenfranchise an already elected president from contesting in an election that has been won. In the case of their symbol, bargaining became eminent when, rather than present facts that he won the election, he embarked on a whirlwind journey of character assassination, churning out bovine vociferations all in a bid to persuade the election tribunal to disenfranchise an already elected president. To make the scenario more laughable, the grief sufferers went to the hills and the mountains, praying and cursing, telling a non-existent audience that the tribunal would give back a stolen mandate to the candidate that came third in a race; humour at its best. Perhaps, the grief sufferers believed that a wanton display of emotions was enough to sway the tribunal’s verdict to favour their ill-objectivist agenda to derail an electoral process that, although it may have had its flaw, provided a glimpse of an institution headed in the right direction.

DEPRESSION
When the reality of vanity in the choice of bargaining tool fails to work, the grief sufferers move to the stage of depression, a long-lasting sadness occasioned by the reality of the situation that the loss has come to stay. Fuelled by feelings of despondence, owing to the reality of the setbacks witnessed during the tribunal seatings, the grief sufferers become disillusioned by the knowledge that their personal investments in a failed political project is akin to someone who only succeeded in labouring in vain. The grief sufferers eventually begin to accept the reality of the loss, although this is accompanied by a high degree of psychological challenges. At this point, they come to terms with what to expect for the future. In the next four years, the grief sufferers are expected to despair about all moves and policies of the incoming administration. The sadness that overwhelms their mental systems will culminate in a lethargic and diminished joy, making it harder for them to see beyond their hate by objectively analysing the merits of every policy rolled out by the new administration whose leadership they have come to loath. Rather than embark on cognitive behavioural therapy to help them examine their thoughts and actions to regain control over their emotions, the depression will only fuel their angst as they continue to trivialise issues based on their ethereal exigencies. Emotions are often difficult to change since they are wired to the innermost parts of the brain; expecting the grief sufferers to adopt objectivity when analysing the new administration’s policies is equivalent to the biblical rendition of a camel passing through the eye of a needle.

ACCPETANCE
Eventually, one thing that cannot be changed is the fact that bearing an act of God or the occurrence of any uncontrollable event, the president-elect will steer the administration of the next four years in close synergy with the vice-president. It is expected that any sane individual, irrespective of the grief he or she might have passed through, should accept this reality and stabilise their emotions by kowtowing to the reality of the situation. The fog created by an extreme dislike for the persona occupying the highest leadership position of the country needs to be cleared for the grief sufferers to nurture positive thoughts about the country’s future, knowing well enough that thoughts or negativity will never replace the president with their perceived messiah. Acceptance, as a final stage of grief, opens the minds of the sufferer to the reality on the ground. Acceptance may also come from a matured understanding of the complexities of politics and the fact that democracy is deeply rooted in the majority’s choices and not in the choice of a minority that believe they are more patriotic than others. However, whether the grief sufferers choose to evolve into such a reality will determine how they fit into the new reality. For the ones that transit to this stage, a sense of calm will take over their being, and the new feeling gives them rest of mind and an avenue for forward thinking. Those who decide to domicile in the earlier stages of grief will only be doing themselves great psychological harm since they have no means of changing the reality on the ground. Grief is a process that must end with the sufferer accepting the reality of it and moving on. However, choosing to perpetually dwell on the loss will not let the grief go away, subsequently triggering floods of emotions that only accentuate the ill-mental health of the sufferer.

https://thepenparliament./2023/05/27/the-obidient-mentality-from-the-lens-of-kluber-ross-five-stages-of-grief/

Na wa… Sheybi dingBAT is now president. Still you’re obsessed with anything Obi and ObiDients!!
I’m sure when you went out to buy fuel today you were asked to show your heavily dented forehead for free fuel.