phemmyfour:
Happened to someone:
Acting like a mother to your siblings especially when mum is no longer alive. Unfortunately those sacrifices were not appreciated by her siblings

I have Siblings that don't want to work.

He said he can't answer sir for anybody but wants to live a big man life. I stopped my mom from giving him food even though my Mom still hide to give him food sometimes.

He can come to the house and sleep but you see that food, so far the money comes from me he is not going to eat that food.

spiceadole:


I can totally relate..You have to take it easy,my sister.
As a first child,first and only daughter.. the responsibility no be here.

People used to envy me because I earned well but I was suffering.
Would send money home for virtually everything..The worst of it..my jobless brothers would complain it was not enough and my mom would take sides with them.
All of us ..graduates..trained with family funds and some scholarships but it was me who was expected to bear family responsibilities.

I was at some point,almost resorting to loan apps,in order to satisfy them.

I started having palpitations and insomnia.
Whenever my phone rang and it's a call from home,my heart would skip a beat .
I know what I will hear is " Send money for this and that".

I was with some colleagues one day,my brother called to say I should send money for tissue paper and also to refill gas...
That mom was cooking and gas finished.

I was angry and flared up..
After,I sent them a token,The last born called and requested I send money for DSTV subscription..
I told him I didn't have.
There was no insult this boy didn't reign on me..he even went as far as sending me SMS to insult,calling me barren and ugly...afterall,I wasn't married(as at then),so what was I doing with ALL my money?


I received sense...stopped bankrolling them.
Saved up my money,got married soon after and relocated overseas.

Since then,I only send money to mom, occasionally.
The rest are sorting themselves out.

One thing about Siblings and parents is that once you start attending to their needs the moment they ask, they will think that you have plenty of money or have one place you are pumping money from.

They don't know you are sacrificing your happiness just to meet their needs and make them happy.

chukkystar:
Na Woman dey remember House ooo. That's why I dey shock when men dey underrate Female child. Female wey get Money no fit forget House wey she come from, na Man get new responsibilities em go face another side

I can relate bro, Female children dey important oo. They are the ones that remember home, though male children do.

But in Africa, we place much importance on Male Children. In the Western world, them no send whether na male or female. To them, the child is a child, they don't even have many kids, just one or two.

Evestar200:
have shared mine

Which LGA in Delta, do you hail from ?

[quote author=naniawini post=123929246]I'm the first born daughter. I no dey do pass myself besides I've got kids so they come first before anyone.

Though I don really face setbacks for this life sha

Mummyimbecile:
I can relate bro, Female children dey important oo. They are the ones that remember home, though male children do.

But in Africa, we place much importance on Male Children. In the Western world, them no send whether na male or female. To them, the child is a child, they don't even have many kids, just one or two.

That's why alot of them have very stable Homes. A Child is a gift from God not by anyone's doing. Women are the only ones that will Love the Parents and Siblings no matter their wrongs. I dey hardly see House wey the Wife no dey try bring one of her relatives come House stay or dey send small thing back. They know the importance of Love. My Family group online, its my Sister that thought of it. All of us Men full there we didn't think of something that Unifying

Evestar200:
I have Siblings that don't want to work.

He said he can't answer sir for anybody but wants to live a big man life. I stopped my mom from giving him food even though my Mom still hide to give him food sometimes.

He can come to the house and sleep but you see that food, so far the money comes from me he is not going to eat that food.

lol, from the tune of your voice, you must be a strong woman.

You sound like my sis, when we arrived in the states, she told me and my bro point black that she has done what a sister can do for her younger brothers and even more, that it's left for us to hussle, that she will only take care of our fees for my masters program and his Bsc program, that house rent and feeding is on our heads.

That made us to stand on our feet straight up.

Lol, how can your brother want to live a big man life, yet he doesn't want to answer anybody sir for a start.






I have one advise for first daughters, no matter how much you love your siblings and take care of them, don't put them ahead of your life. Start a relationship and build your own family.


If you don't, a time will come when they will mock you and tell you that it is because of your bad character that made a man not marry you.

sageb:


Which LGA in Delta, do you hail from ?

UG South

Thank God for my job sha else I would have felt useless....

Nigeriagood:
Knacking siofra

Kaii....na lie jorrr.
bro u sayin u fukkk siofra? Why? How? Were? Show me prooooooove sir!!!

Train up your child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it. This applies to ALL Borns!

As a first daughter myself, nobody can put me under any pressure of any responsibility that I did not put myself. I do whatever I do of my own volition and not as an obligation. We (four of us) were raised to be independent.

The only person or people I owe some obligation, duty, responsibility (whatever term you prefer to use) is my child or children. If I did not give birth to you, I do not owe you any obligation!

Wisdom is profitable to direct.

Kudos to all living first born daughters in this thread...

May all your efforts never go in vain

Evestar200:
I have Siblings that don't want to work.

He said he can't answer sir for anybody but wants to live a big man life. I stopped my mom from giving him food even though my Mom still hide to give him food sometimes.

He can come to the house and sleep but you see that food, so far the money comes from me he is not going to eat that food.

That's a high level of stupidity and irresponsibility

I'm not a girl nor first born,,,,,but from having relationship with first born daughter,mehn it's not easy oooooo

MechanicMike:



Kaii....na lie jorrr.
bro u sayin u fukkk siofra? Why? How? Were? Show me prooooooove sir!!!

ah no sir,it is my greatest challenge so far(no offense)

Nigeriagood:
ah no sir,it is my greatest challenge so far(no offense)

Bro no worries. Siofra is one of my babe.i will instruct am to start dating u from Tuesday.!!!!((TANK ME LATER))

Let first daughters breeev.

Evestar200:
UG South

Wow ! Mavo?

Evestar200:
Dear Firstborn Daughters,

Have you ever felt you had more responsibilities than your siblings? Are you expected to serve as a role model? And what have been your greatest challenges or achievements as a firstborn daughter in the African household?

It has not been easy for me, I almost fall into depression one time because of too many expenses.

People will be seeing me as a big girl because of my salary but in reality that money will only be in my account within 10 days of payment and I will have to manage the little one that remains till the next payment.

One day I sit myself down, talk sense into myself and removed two of my brothers from my budget.

As for now, the only people am responsible for are my Mom and our last born.

My neighbours in School then and friends will be saying I want to be like you, I will always warn them not to wish for that because of the money I received, they can't manage what I am passing through.

Abeg wic one be first born daughter. Me way be 6th born the give me first born daughter money even 4th born and 7th (last born) , the dash am money. If I no get I no get simple. You choose to shoulder all those responsibilities. . Mikel obi, osime n psquare are all last born or second to the last.

Nazgul:
The only people I pity are their husbands. Cos they'll spend their entire life feeding and training her siblings. And if they're like 8 or 10 and she's the first daughter, the husband go hear am.

My brother dodge one bullet. They first thing I de ask, are u de first born , how many are you in your family? Omo if I hear 6 and first born. Na dat place en stop

Annahh:
I'm a first daughter but I no dey do pass myself, I can't give you all my salary and be drinking garri, my job demands strength and strength comes also from eating good food which costs money. Nobody should put unnecessary pressure on me. I give what I can give, take it.

Evestar200:
One thing about Siblings and parents is that once you start attending to their needs the moment they ask, they will think that you have plenty of money or have one place you are pumping money from.

They don't know you are sacrificing your happiness just to meet their needs and make them happy.

At the end, they will say what did/have you done for them?
For me, I just do what I can for now and don't stress myself on family again.
If I die today, they will always find a way to survive.
My immediate junior brother just came back from UAE this February after working for 5 years there with No dime on him and what did I get back? Ooohhh, how can you send me to a rubbish country like UAE to work and surfer when there are better countries like Canada, US, UK etc
This is a man that was given a work visa and a job right from Nigeria before stepping his foot out of the country with a starting salary of 1,500 diharms with extra side money to make.
My uncle that we sent there a year later has finished building his house here despite been a married man compared to him.
He was busy drinking, taking hard drugs up and down there and turned to a kolomenta.
Took the idiot to psychiatric hospital last week because he was just misbehaving up and down here and told the doctor it was because he lost his mum that made him start taking hard drugs that is about to render him useless.
Wetin consign mama death to smoking? Before the person die sef, one naira you no send to her, after she died, one naira you no send come home for burial. Na me do everything so who suppose dey smoke, who dey smoke kwanu

Heroicvic:
I'm the first son
I haven't achieved anything
I'm 20+ and sad

You guys won't understand

I totally agree with you bro. But trust me don't be depressed, I had my little achievement in life in my late 20s, I never gave up even as family wahala is on my head as the first and only son of the family.

Being a first son is even more relieved if you have a sibling who is a guy, but when you're the first son and all other siblings are girls nna Na another topic o😂😂😂

But I'll implore you not to relent your pursuit and believe in making it legitimately.

Also, channel your path you earning your income remotely and don't be tied to one job... It took over 3yrs of spanking from my mentors before I realised what they mean,

Most esp analyse your circle, always try to stay with those that have achieved more than you, it's like an adrenaline to your dream..

My 2kobo piece of advise bro. Shalom

I am the first child/first daughter of my family.
It is not an easy job/task.
Aside from being the home runner of the family because dad is late and mom is in the village (farmer) doing the little she can.

It is not easy, I started working at the age of 12 and I have still not made it. I sacrificed all my life and time taking care of my siblings (4 boys and 1 gal) , neglecting my own self and personal needs.

Now I'm filled with regrets. They r all grown-up and living their lives fgting all my sufferings and sacrifices. I did not enjoy my youth, and i also did not have fun. Instead I was very reserved and all my thoughts was home bound. No child no marriage, depression 100% .Bp 100% brokenness 100%.

If only I didn't carry my family problems on my head at the detriment of mine. Y'all shld learn from my mistakes. I did not enjoy any first child privilege. There were days I slept wit empty stomachs and alot of times took garri to work to drink while I ensured my siblings had little portions of the last food at home.

Now all they do is take care of their girlfriends.

alamscolo:


I totally agree with you bro. But trust me don't be depressed, I had my little achievement in life in my late 20s, I never gave up even as family wahala is on my head as the first and only son of the family.

Being a first son is even more relieved if you have a sibling who is a guy, but when you're the first son and all other siblings are girls nna Na another topic o😂😂😂

But I'll implore you not to relent your pursuit and believe in making it legitimately.

Also, channel your path you earning your income remotely and don't be tied to one job... It took over 3yrs of spanking from my mentors before I realised what they mean,

Most esp analyse your circle, always try to stay with those that have achieved more than you, it's like an adrenaline to your dream..

My 2kobo piece of advise bro. Shalom

God bless you brr
I'll tag you inshallah in the future
🙏🙏

kings59:
Nothing like first born. It's first child

First child daughters?


Some people ehn

No and no.
Dont allow people take you as mumu.
Dont overspend.
You have to have savings and good plans for yourself.
Your lazy siblings must look for jobs to do.
Dont throw away your money feeding lazy ass guys.
Let hunger kill them. If they cant work, they should not eat.

There are lot of jobs you can do here in nigeria.
Of course you see around, people that are doing well in their businesses and live comfortably. You can also do well like them with hard work.
Go out and work. Learn from what others are doing.

Nazgul:
The only people I pity are their husbands. Cos they'll spend their entire life feeding and training her siblings. And if they're like 8 or 10 and she's the first daughter, the husband go hear am.

LMAOOOO! I know someone like this, I ran for my life. My legs didn't touch the ground while I was running because her own siblings were still very young btw 10, 8 & 5 years old respectively. Didn't make any common sense!