There was once a blind old man who just received his long overdue pension money and decided to use it to travel and tour las vegas before he died. So he went on the plane and when he felt his seat he said "wow, this seat is huge", and the guy sitting next to him said "everything is big in las vegas". Then when he got to vegas and was shown to his hotel room he lay down on the bed and felt it then said "wow, this bed is really huge", and the porter told him "sir, everything in vegas is big". Then the old man went down to the bar for a drink and when the beer was handed to him in a large mug he exclamated "gosh, this tumbler is very big", and the barman told him "pops, you are in las vegas, everything here is extra large". Then the man wanted to pee and the bar man told him to "go up to the second floor by your right" and the old man went but on his way to the second floor he tripped and fell on the stairs and instead went up to the third floor. Now in this floor there was a swimming pool and when the man got to it he fell inside and then started waving his hands and screaming "DONT FLUSH - DONT FLUSH"

Why? You never specified that the pool was a water closet.

^^ is this guy for real?

lilkech:

^^ is this guy for real?

you mean the guy seeing big things?

Emmyk:

you mean the guy seeing big things?

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D guy in my joke is BLIND and cant see shyte.
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Emmyk:

Why? You never specified that the pool was a water closet.

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After reading this response from you earlier i understood your problem , you shuldnt be trying to read jokes because you have a special sense 'OFF' humour

Sometimes it is the responses to a joke that gives it the humor. . .LMAO
Nice one Poster
@Emm: Guy, it is not brain science naaa

One day on a plane, all the passengers had boarded and they were eagerly waiting for their pilots to come so that their journey would begin, the pilots were already running late.
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Then two men dressed up in pilot uniforms appeared at the doorway and it was obvious that they were BOTH BLIND because one was 'tap-tapping' around with a 'cane' and the other was tugging the leash of a 'seeing eye dog', even the both of them were wearing shades.
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The men then proceeded forward to the cockpit through the centre isle and were zig -zaging and bumping into the heads of all the passengers sitting at the centre till they got to the cockpit and went in, the passengers looked confused.
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Now the passengers thought that this was a practical joke the plane crew was playing and they giggled and laughed , When the planes engines started they all looked to the stewards with questioning glances and murmured , When the plane started moving they all fastened their seat belts and looked at themselves with frightful gazes , When the plane was on top speed they all started making noises and calling the attention of the planes crew , When the plane was almost at the end of the tarmac the passengers started screaming at the top of their lungs , Then at that last instant the plane lifted off into the air.
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*IN THE COCKPIT*
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PILOT1: you know bob, we better think of retiring from flying.
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PILOT2: why bill?
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PILOT1: because one day, the passengers 'WONT SCREAM' and we will never know 'WHEN TO TAKE OFF'

Can you summarise the second joke to two lines? Please :-(

Emmyk:

Can you summarise the second joke to two lines? Please :-(

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I KNOW YOU ARE A 'SEMI-BLIND' MAN.
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UNTIL YOU FIX WIPER ON YOUR EYES, YOU WILL NOT UNDERSTAND A WORD I POST.

This dumb lilkech ought not to be unbanned. You are wasting the threads with these meaningfuless jokes

Ajibel:

This dumb lilkech ought not to be unbanned. You are wasting the threads with these meaningfuless jokes

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So because Ben10 dem don dey count our posts you don decide to try dey carry first for that side abi? Good luck, u go win (as nobody dey mumuish enough to follow you drag am)

^ Wetin this dry-joker they vascooze from that im garbage cavy-mouth? Abeg free me like my brother terry-g

lilkech:

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I KNOW YOU ARE A 'SEMI-BLIND' MAN.
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UNTIL YOU FIX WIPER ON YOUR EYES, YOU WILL NOT UNDERSTAND A WORD I POST.

lol. Is it necessary I laugh at your dumb jokes?

lilkech i'm very happy for u cos you r doing better

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