Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Richy4(m): 10:46am On Feb 11, 2023 |
Klass99:
At the bolded, his father cares for him, he is not alone. His father cared enough to return for him 15 or 17 years later, he cared enough to take the boy into his home with his new family, he cared enough to buy him gifts and treat him nice, so much so that he began to disrespect/dishonour his mother and her family.
I feel no sympathy whatsoever towards this boy, teenager or not, he needs to stay disowned. I am very sure his mother and grandparents would have tried to explain the circumstances of his birth to him and tried to either caution him or appeal to his good sense. He should bond with his father o, after all blood is thicker than water. Klass most teenagers are confused... Most preferred the easiest part life have to offer.. that is why many are into defrauding people...They are immature and they hated the hard and real part of life..
You and I equally knows that the father doesn't want him.. probably wants to use him to prove a point to the mother...To achieve that, he understands him as a teenager, Went all out by using a local ways of catching a rat.. Throw all his Arsenal.. Shirts, cake, cellphones etc... He knows that what he have in mind will work like magic and it did...
That's why I strongly believed that he has not changed and should be in Nigeria to learn the reality of life and understand the consequences of his actions...
When the time is right and he has proven himself, the uncle will definitely know... And connects him back to his mother's people first.. if they sanction his character and changes, then they can reconnect him with his mother...
I must say though that that woman is courageous... She should be a role model to some women in an abusive relationship as well...Who claimed that they can't leave because of their kids... And as soon as they kicked the bucket, the kids quickly readjusts to the situation..
18 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Klass99(f): 11:19am On Feb 11, 2023 |
18 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by id4sho(m): 11:21am On Feb 11, 2023 |
If I b pikin, na to threaten the mother with suicide. Look for picture of sniper and rat poison and give 6am for shock news. She no go sleep that night. Honestly, the father has gaslighted him. Tell him how wicked his grandparents and mother is, not using his father's name unlike his classmates. That boy is still small, am sure he's missing his grandparents house, pampering, spoiling and endless love 1 Like |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by faithfull18(f): 11:28am On Feb 11, 2023 |
Lol, sweet story.
How do you just throw away such sacrifices just for a few gifts. Women dey try abeg. OP, let her be, she deserves a life too. 5 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Richy4(m): 11:37am On Feb 11, 2023 |
Klass99:
Hmm Richy, you always make me smile sha. At the first bolded, there is nothing new under the sun na, were we not once teenagers oursleves? Were we without an ounce of common sense like this teenager has displayed? It is in every man to know good and evil, right from wrong, we are all born with that innate ability. It can be called a conscience and a guilt conscience is like an alarm that goes off within us, when we have done wrong This boy knew what he was doing, he takes after his father - the apple never falls far from the tree.
2nd bolded - I am shaking my head and saying no, no, no, no to this. Zupay please none of you in your cousin's family should contemplate it. Let your cousin on her own be the one to indicate that she is willing and open to a reconciliation and reconnection. No one should pressure or compel her to do this on their timetable or the boy's pleading, complaints and suffer head. She needs to work this out by herself and reach a decision by herself without undue interference.
Last paragraph - oh I totally agree with you. I like and admire her for the guts it took, to walk away and put herself first. Too many women give up their lives for the sake men (husbands & sons plus children) to the detriment of their souls and dreams. I applaud any woman who has the presence of mind to say, enough is enough in a bad situation after giving it her best and then walking away, to prioritise her well-being and bring back to life dead hopes and dreams. In my mindset I never believed that I made mistakes as a teenager... But again, that's what every grown up says.. You know how fathers and mothers were almost always at the top of their class... One now wondered who was taking the middle and last positions...
I know that he will change and when he does, they should take him back as the prodigal son...
Klass, I have said it over and over again, any time you have a kid or children.and they clock 8 and above, please invite me. I will really like to see your style of parenting at that stage.. I really really want to check something..
2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Klass99(f): 11:52am On Feb 11, 2023 |
8 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Richy4(m): 12:00pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Klass99:
I am not saying we didn't make mistakes or we were perfect, but some if not most of us had enough sense within to stop us in our tracks when we were going overboard or starting to really get it wrong. Not only because of that innate ability I mentioned but also because of the training and upbringing received at home and in school.
From the story this boy was surrounded by love and wonderful grand-parents, whom ﹰI sure did good, did right and did well by him, including his mother. I know people can grow and change, but a reconciliation should not be pushed or forced on the mother, if she doesn't want again. Whether the boy changes or not, it is not by force to reunite them or for him to japa to the UK.
I feel U Klass, but if u change your mind about having kids say 8 or 9 of them , my offer for excursion to check things still stands...🙈🙊🤓 |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by faithfull18(f): 12:01pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Klass99:
I am not saying we didn't make mistakes or we were perfect, but some if not most of us had enough sense within to stop us in our tracks when we were going overboard or starting to really get it wrong. Not only because of that innate ability I mentioned but also because of the training and upbringing received at home and in school.
From the story this boy was surrounded by love and wonderful grand-parents, whom ﹰI am sure did good, did right and did well by him, including his mother. I know people can grow and change, but a reconciliation should not be pushed or forced on the mother, if she doesn't want again. Whether the boy changes or not, it is not by force to reunite them or for him to japa to the UK.
This user's post best describes me, like him I am staying child free abeg. Motherhood does not interest me. I cannot deal, especially with children like this teenager and someone's sister on front page. I was not made for unnecessary stress and strain, marriage and kids are life choices o, not mandatory goals or achievements. I have a choice, I get to choose. Who will take care of you when you are old? Who will continue your legacies? Who will run errands for you and check on you? Questions the average Nigerian will ask when they hear this. 1 Like |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by sharpwriter(m): 12:08pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Jamesbiodun: He want to go to the UK because someone told him that his mother can take him coz I don't see why he just think his mother can take him to the UK when she just relocated... Are you thinking what I am thinking... All na scope No mind the boy... Hin do tear eyes and hin wan go oyinbo land If at all he's coming back to his mother side, let him be looked after by the mother's family and grandparents. Let him stay here complete education, even Bsc. So he go learn sense and be mature. Taking him along now with his recently displayed tantrums would make life difficult for his mother over there. Yẹ̀yẹ́ boy. 4 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Aboguede(m): 12:12pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
|
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Klass99(f): 12:13pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
12 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by ipobarecriminals: 12:14pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
|
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Starships4u(m): 12:15pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Zupay: My cousin's son has been a source of disturbance to me for the past 2 weeks.
The background story.
My cousin got pregnant with him when she was 19 but the father who then in his mid 20s denied the pregnancy in the presence of both families and went on to claim the reason he gave her money to procure an abortion was because he was only one of the guys sleeping with my cousin at the time (which was a blatant lie) and it was his own contribution.
My Uncle and Aunt (my cousin's parents) had to accept the guy's denial and solely took care of my cousin's pregnancy. Her son was born in 2007 and bears my Uncle's name, he was taken care of by his grandparents, uncles and aunts as his mother went back to school and graduated. My cousin got a better paying job in 2015 and moved out of their family house with her son, who is presently in S.S.2.
The biological father resurfaced sometime last year in May, starting to make claims and all. He went directly to the boy's school to introduce himself and starting meeting the boy, buying him things without my cousin's knowledge until the man showed up at my uncle's house with some of his relatives but my uncle didn't receive them.
The boy was becoming rude to his mother, talking back at her, telling her he would push for a change in his surname to that of his biological father, became cold to his grandparents etc To cut long story, he moved to his father's house in August of last year and resumed school from there. My cousin (his mother) was seriously sick in October of last year, this boy never bothered to call on his mother despite knowing of her illness and he has a phone he uses freely.
My cousin (his mother) relocated to the UK early this January, on a skilled worker visa as she works in a children' home and have made up her mind to refocus on getting married and having other kids. Her son has been calling her, which she has never picked also sending her long stories of how his father's wife have been maltreating him even in the presence of his father and the father would say nothing. Pleading with the mother to bring him over to the UK to live with her (her visa allows her to bring her son to the UK easily since he is under 18) but my cousin have not been replying him and this boy has been disturbing me to talk his mother on his behalf as I am very close to my cousin.
I have spoken to my cousin severally and she insisted she has washed off her hands where her son is concerned, that she doesn't want him around her as she needs to live singly and have a relationship that would lead to marriage, that she really wants to settle down.
I have told the boy to concentrate on finishing secondary school but he seems obsessed with wanting to relocate to the UK though my other cousin (his mother's younger brother) has confirmed that the boy is having it rough living with the father, his wife and other children.
I believe his mother has a right to have a new lease of life.
This boy is always messaging me asking for updates, I don't know what else to tell him!
The boy felt he has grown.... So let him fend for himself... Let the mom support him from a distance tho... That way she'd regain her respect where he is without being close to affect her mental health. 1 Like |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by abobote: 12:15pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Why will you even have time for the foolish boy 2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Greystone: 12:16pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Janesouthall:
Na wa ooo....so all you are interested in this story is the cousin contact....shey ladies don Finnish for ur area ni.... Silly fowl wants to use OP’s cousin to japa 2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by rajiedreez: 12:17pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
|
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by BRATISLAVA: 12:17pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Now it is the season of your female relatives.
Men abandon and disown their entire families and it isn't a disturbance. Maybe her bad husband caused it. A lot of men only show their true colors in marriage. He should pray for the restoration of his family.
Next. 2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Franzinni: 12:18pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
He is where he belongs ... Let him use it as fuel to prove to the world what he is worth not free load the easy life off other people ... Your cousin deserves a life oooo. Let her enjoy it.she is making a good choice ...if she even decided to help him, let him be older than 18 maybe like 26 when he would truly appreciate any hand of help extended to him.
Just tell him at this point, your cousin can't bring him untill he is done with his university. 4 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by GorillaApp(m): 12:18pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Zupay: My cousin's son has been a source of disturbance to me for the past 2 weeks.
The background story.
My cousin got pregnant with him when she was 19 but the father who then in his mid 20s denied the pregnancy in the presence of both families and went on to claim the reason he gave her money to procure an abortion was because he was only one of the guys sleeping with my cousin at the time (which was a blatant lie) and it was his own contribution.
My Uncle and Aunt (my cousin's parents) had to accept the guy's denial and solely took care of my cousin's pregnancy. Her son was born in 2007 and bears my Uncle's name, he was taken care of by his grandparents, uncles and aunts as his mother went back to school and graduated. My cousin got a better paying job in 2015 and moved out of their family house with her son, who is presently in S.S.2.
The biological father resurfaced sometime last year in May, starting to make claims and all. He went directly to the boy's school to introduce himself and starting meeting the boy, buying him things without my cousin's knowledge until the man showed up at my uncle's house with some of his relatives but my uncle didn't receive them.
The boy was becoming rude to his mother, talking back at her, telling her he would push for a change in his surname to that of his biological father, became cold to his grandparents etc To cut long story, he moved to his father's house in August of last year and resumed school from there. My cousin (his mother) was seriously sick in October of last year, this boy never bothered to call on his mother despite knowing of her illness and he has a phone he uses freely.
My cousin (his mother) relocated to the UK early this January, on a skilled worker visa as she works in a children' home and have made up her mind to refocus on getting married and having other kids. Her son has been calling her, which she has never picked also sending her long stories of how his father's wife have been maltreating him even in the presence of his father and the father would say nothing. Pleading with the mother to bring him over to the UK to live with her (her visa allows her to bring her son to the UK easily since he is under 18) but my cousin have not been replying him and this boy has been disturbing me to talk his mother on his behalf as I am very close to my cousin.
I have spoken to my cousin severally and she insisted she has washed off her hands where her son is concerned, that she doesn't want him around her as she needs to live singly and have a relationship that would lead to marriage, that she really wants to settle down.
I have told the boy to concentrate on finishing secondary school but he seems obsessed with wanting to relocate to the UK though my other cousin (his mother's younger brother) has confirmed that the boy is having it rough living with the father, his wife and other children.
I believe his mother has a right to have a new lease of life.
This boy is always messaging me asking for updates, I don't know what else to tell him!
Let the mother have her peace. She can send money for school and other stuff but she should not take him across. It will end in tears for her 6 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by ipobarecriminals: 12:18pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
16 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Parachoko: 12:19pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Zupay: My cousin's son has been a source of disturbance to me for the past 2 weeks.
The background story.
My cousin got pregnant with him when she was 19 but the father who then in his mid 20s denied the pregnancy in the presence of both families and went on to claim the reason he gave her money to procure an abortion was because he was only one of the guys sleeping with my cousin at the time (which was a blatant lie) and it was his own contribution.
My Uncle and Aunt (my cousin's parents) had to accept the guy's denial and solely took care of my cousin's pregnancy. Her son was born in 2007 and bears my Uncle's name, he was taken care of by his grandparents, uncles and aunts as his mother went back to school and graduated. My cousin got a better paying job in 2015 and moved out of their family house with her son, who is presently in S.S.2.
The biological father resurfaced sometime last year in May, starting to make claims and all. He went directly to the boy's school to introduce himself and starting meeting the boy, buying him things without my cousin's knowledge until the man showed up at my uncle's house with some of his relatives but my uncle didn't receive them.
The boy was becoming rude to his mother, talking back at her, telling her he would push for a change in his surname to that of his biological father, became cold to his grandparents etc To cut long story, he moved to his father's house in August of last year and resumed school from there. My cousin (his mother) was seriously sick in October of last year, this boy never bothered to call on his mother despite knowing of her illness and he has a phone he uses freely.
My cousin (his mother) relocated to the UK early this January, on a skilled worker visa as she works in a children' home and have made up her mind to refocus on getting married and having other kids. Her son has been calling her, which she has never picked also sending her long stories of how his father's wife have been maltreating him even in the presence of his father and the father would say nothing. Pleading with the mother to bring him over to the UK to live with her (her visa allows her to bring her son to the UK easily since he is under 18) but my cousin have not been replying him and this boy has been disturbing me to talk his mother on his behalf as I am very close to my cousin.
I have spoken to my cousin severally and she insisted she has washed off her hands where her son is concerned, that she doesn't want him around her as she needs to live singly and have a relationship that would lead to marriage, that she really wants to settle down.
I have told the boy to concentrate on finishing secondary school but he seems obsessed with wanting to relocate to the UK though my other cousin (his mother's younger brother) has confirmed that the boy is having it rough living with the father, his wife and other children.
I believe his mother has a right to have a new lease of life.
This boy is always messaging me asking for updates, I don't know what else to tell him!
If am your cousin, I go tell you not to ever contact me again then, I go block and delete your contact from my phone. You're a very wicked person for even advising her to take the boy to the UK. He needs to stay with his dad here in Nigeria and get use to staying with him and his wife. 9 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by GhostMan15: 12:19pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
SON OF DOOM Zupay: My cousin's son has been a source of disturbance to me for the past 2 weeks.
The background story.
My cousin got pregnant with him when she was 19 but the father who then in his mid 20s denied the pregnancy in the presence of both families and went on to claim the reason he gave her money to procure an abortion was because he was only one of the guys sleeping with my cousin at the time (which was a blatant lie) and it was his own contribution.
My Uncle and Aunt (my cousin's parents) had to accept the guy's denial and solely took care of my cousin's pregnancy. Her son was born in 2007 and bears my Uncle's name, he was taken care of by his grandparents, uncles and aunts as his mother went back to school and graduated. My cousin got a better paying job in 2015 and moved out of their family house with her son, who is presently in S.S.2.
The biological father resurfaced sometime last year in May, starting to make claims and all. He went directly to the boy's school to introduce himself and starting meeting the boy, buying him things without my cousin's knowledge until the man showed up at my uncle's house with some of his relatives but my uncle didn't receive them.
The boy was becoming rude to his mother, talking back at her, telling her he would push for a change in his surname to that of his biological father, became cold to his grandparents etc To cut long story, he moved to his father's house in August of last year and resumed school from there. My cousin (his mother) was seriously sick in October of last year, this boy never bothered to call on his mother despite knowing of her illness and he has a phone he uses freely.
My cousin (his mother) relocated to the UK early this January, on a skilled worker visa as she works in a children' home and have made up her mind to refocus on getting married and having other kids. Her son has been calling her, which she has never picked also sending her long stories of how his father's wife have been maltreating him even in the presence of his father and the father would say nothing. Pleading with the mother to bring him over to the UK to live with her (her visa allows her to bring her son to the UK easily since he is under 18) but my cousin have not been replying him and this boy has been disturbing me to talk his mother on his behalf as I am very close to my cousin.
I have spoken to my cousin severally and she insisted she has washed off her hands where her son is concerned, that she doesn't want him around her as she needs to live singly and have a relationship that would lead to marriage, that she really wants to settle down.
I have told the boy to concentrate on finishing secondary school but he seems obsessed with wanting to relocate to the UK though my other cousin (his mother's younger brother) has confirmed that the boy is having it rough living with the father, his wife and other children.
I believe his mother has a right to have a new lease of life.
This boy is always messaging me asking for updates, I don't know what else to tell him!
2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Realestatevixen: 12:19pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Mindlog:
Yes, we can't discount the father being in the background of the desire to have him move to the UK. 🤣🤣🤣
I work here in the UK, in a company that recruits workforce from overseas and some of my colleagues who are single mothers who have no one to leave their child/children with back home in their home countries, had to arrive with their kids though it is better to come alone first, then after 2/3 months file for the child/children to come join them.
Hello mindlog Please I am in search of a job that can help me relocate with my family. Any help, suggestions and advice will be greatly appreciated. |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by JaySterling: 12:20pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Nollywood story |
|
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by BigYash: 12:20pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
The boy took after his dad to ruin the mother's life. If she knows what's good for her,she should let her son remain with the dad, while she starts another relationship. The son doesn't love the mom,she is only after the benefits.. 4 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by hurlaryinkah(m): 12:21pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
May God bless you for this response of yours! Kobojunkie: The boy is 16/17, right? He made his choice to be with his father and she let him go. So why are you trying to carry his case on your head? 2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by BRATISLAVA: 12:21pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
GorillaApp:
Let the mother have her peace. She can send money for school and other stuff but she should not take him across. It will end in tears for her Do you think the manipulative father turned the heart of the son against his mother with his version of his side of the story? Because the antagonists are male, let's see what advice will be available to them today. 3 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by Nimrod81: 12:23pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Zupay: My cousin's son has been a source of disturbance to me for the past 2 weeks.
The background story.
My cousin got pregnant with him when she was 19 but the father who then in his mid 20s denied the pregnancy in the presence of both families and went on to claim the reason he gave her money to procure an abortion was because he was only one of the guys sleeping with my cousin at the time (which was a blatant lie) and it was his own contribution.
My Uncle and Aunt (my cousin's parents) had to accept the guy's denial and solely took care of my cousin's pregnancy. Her son was born in 2007 and bears my Uncle's name, he was taken care of by his grandparents, uncles and aunts as his mother went back to school and graduated. My cousin got a better paying job in 2015 and moved out of their family house with her son, who is presently in S.S.2.
The biological father resurfaced sometime last year in May, starting to make claims and all. He went directly to the boy's school to introduce himself and starting meeting the boy, buying him things without my cousin's knowledge until the man showed up at my uncle's house with some of his relatives but my uncle didn't receive them.
The boy was becoming rude to his mother, talking back at her, telling her he would push for a change in his surname to that of his biological father, became cold to his grandparents etc To cut long story, he moved to his father's house in August of last year and resumed school from there. My cousin (his mother) was seriously sick in October of last year, this boy never bothered to call on his mother despite knowing of her illness and he has a phone he uses freely.
My cousin (his mother) relocated to the UK early this January, on a skilled worker visa as she works in a children' home and have made up her mind to refocus on getting married and having other kids. Her son has been calling her, which she has never picked also sending her long stories of how his father's wife have been maltreating him even in the presence of his father and the father would say nothing. Pleading with the mother to bring him over to the UK to live with her (her visa allows her to bring her son to the UK easily since he is under 18) but my cousin have not been replying him and this boy has been disturbing me to talk his mother on his behalf as I am very close to my cousin.
I have spoken to my cousin severally and she insisted she has washed off her hands where her son is concerned, that she doesn't want him around her as she needs to live singly and have a relationship that would lead to marriage, that she really wants to settle down.
I have told the boy to concentrate on finishing secondary school but he seems obsessed with wanting to relocate to the UK though my other cousin (his mother's younger brother) has confirmed that the boy is having it rough living with the father, his wife and other children.
I believe his mother has a right to have a new lease of life.
This boy is always messaging me asking for updates, I don't know what else to tell him!
She should do whatever she can to help the boy be comfortable in Nigeria, but she mustn't let him go abroad right now or he would be like a wild raging elephant running amok in the jungle there. He will cause her so much pain. 2 Likes |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by fortunateme: 12:23pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
Zupay, do you love that your cousins at all? That boy might be the ones to kill her if care is not taken. He is a betrayal. Boys hardly betray their mom but this your nephew is a big f. Let your cousin move on with her life but once in a while return his calls. Taking him to the UK will not ever well for her. Advice your cousin to take a Nigeria husband from here oh! 1 Like |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by CodeTemplar: 12:23pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
The young lad has jilted the mom after she spent the youthful part of her to raise him. If he relocates and put up that same attitude that made him dump the mother the first time, the mother may never recover from the second episode with that boy. He should manage his father as if the father raised him from day one since he choose him over the his own mother. The way I am sensing it, that boy is growing up with the free bird mentality and may end up joining street gangs in UK or even harming the mum in UK. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Cousin "Disowned" Her Son. by buzorcharles(m): 12:25pm On Feb 11, 2023 |
If u ever plead on that stupid boy's behalf thunder go fire u. Let the hurted woman rest. He just wanna use her to escape naija and will make her life tough in UK since he has it in him like his father. 10 Likes |