SlyIg:


Not inside school sha but St. Anthony sub chapter in Ifite.
There's no mass inside school until school resumes.

OK I now get it.

farano:
Here's mine. Towards the end of the service, the man of God said 20 ladies should come out and receive special blessing. Mehn come see race for inside church . We were more than 100 that came out o. Then after the prayer, he told some ladies to go back to their seats and selected few of us. I started wondering, "what's this man up to"?

Sharply, He brought out books written by him and CDs produced by him and told us to go round the church and sell them You can't say no now after receiving blessing from him . We did just what he said. Chai! I almost stumbled in the church today...Which kind new style be this one?

DATS AN ADDED BLESSING

IYANGBALI:
My own be say I mess 3 times during the service and nobody knew it was me,I pity the people that sat near me,no be my fault,na nature,pastors too dey mess for altar.

And this sounds funny to you? How old are you?

farano:
Here's mine. Towards the end of the service, the man of God said 20 ladies should come out and receive special blessing. Mehn come see race for inside church . We were more than 100 that came out o. Then after the prayer, he told some ladies to go back to their seats and selected few of us. I started wondering, "what's this man up to"?

Sharply, He brought out books written by him and CDs produced by him and told us to go round the church and sell them You can't say no now after receiving blessing from him . We did just what he said. Chai! I almost stumbled in the church today...Which kind new style be this one?

[b]You just got suckered....



Na so one Pastor say make all the unemployed youths for church come out for special holy ghost approved and blood of Jesus soaked prayers.. See race wey everybody tear.. Even my guy wey dey self employed as a mobile Gala re - distributor (traffic sector) rush come out.. Na ehn pastor bring out this big 4 litre jerry can of olive oil start to speak in tongues.. Kai, the whole guys for front don enter spirit mode sef dey shake..

Next thing I hear na; "The spirit of God has always operated by faith.. I see a lot of oil company jobs." Like 7 guys don already fall under oil company anointing before the Pastor talk finish sef..

"I see 4 people working in Abu Dhabi and Qatar".. Omo like 20 people don fall on top the 4 jobs.. One girl sef start to do like snake for ground.

"Sherimama Shoki Azonto Kiki ma. . I see employment letters entering people mail boxes. NNPC and Chevron letters.. Dated next week Tuesday. . I see it.. Yes Lord. . You are forever faithful. . Rabasaka kekerima. It's coming... its coming .. Yes Lord. ..." Omo like two guys start to do back flip. . Like half the crowd dey ground by now dey roll..

Next thing I hear na.. "O faith .. O ye of little faith.. The Lord says you must show faith that is even smaller than a mustard seed.. Think of your preferred salary and write it on a piece of paper now.. Something Extra miraculous is about to happen here.. Thank you Lord. ." Omo everybody wey dey ground don stand up sharply start to collect paper and pen from ushers.

Everybody dey write 500 thousand, 1 million.. 1.5 million a month, 5 million sef..

Na ehn pastor position the jerry can of olive oil come tell them to write their name and email on top.

Next thing we hear na; "The Lord says you should take a bold step of faith and pay your tithes now on this salary now and test him.. " all the ushers don show with P.O.S machine o.. "Go and borrow money and pay this tithe and wait for your miracle. . "


Omo.. I bust laff for where I dey.. How you wan pay tithe for 1 million naira salary wey you never see? See as guys sad..




Till date, nobody don see one job exam invite talkless of work.. [/b]

cushycute:
Area Mummy gave some money to a woman who danced well during thanksgiving , as today was thanksgiving sunday. It was really funny tho I liked it

Omo Adeboye

Thanksgiving service was awesome.

The choir was phenomenal afta dere 1st presentation the pastor had to tell them to continue wit it.

Emmysteve:
And this sounds funny to you? How old are you?

62. You no dey mess?sidon there dey pose

the Bishop told us the history of the diocese during sermon. In fact we had a history class in place of sermon

@sit backquote author=Kachisbarbie post=26880778]This couple did thanksgiving today in church - the wedding was yesterday. The pastor said, if you don't want this year to pass you by...come forward.
...mehn, both male/female...every1 started adjusting/wearing their shoes well to take off to the altar.
No one wanted to be the first to get there(altar)- to avoid looking desperate...

Then the MOG said - come with a seed offering to challenge God. I actually saw some people sit back [/quote]

Superstar007:
My pastor asked how much I bought
my iphone6 . And I told him 25k
instead of 200k cos I didn't want him
to know I had that amount of money
on me.
Now he just gave me 50k to buy the same phone for himself and his wife.
Please, what should I do?

I know before he gave you that money, He knew how much it worth.

Now go and tell him that the guy you bought it from said yours was a sample product and the last one. that now the original price is 200k.

And do not ask for this kind of ridiculous help next time. if you don't know how to tell lies, u better keep it real. and tell your pastor to stay away from good Phones

After prayer nd deliverance. By the visiting evang. He then asked parents to build an altar for their children with 21,000. But he said it in such a way that everyone thought it was 1,000. With that the altar was filled with people. But on realizing he meant 21,000. People started rushing back to their seats. Lolz. The country is really tough u know

farano:
Here's mine. Towards the end of the service, the man of God said 20 ladies should come out and receive special blessing. Mehn come see race for inside church . We were more than 100 that came out o. Then after the prayer, he told some ladies to go back to their seats and selected few of us. I started wondering, "what's this man up to"?

Sharply, He brought out books written by him and CDs produced by him and told us to go round the church and sell them You can't say no now after receiving blessing from him . We did just what he said. Chai! I almost stumbled in the church today...Which kind new style be this one?

see how pastor turns you to marketer without formal training. Sister farano how market

SlyIg:
Yea ...

A new priest celebrated mass for us at the Unizik Sub chapter of NFCS in Ifite, Awka.
Today is actually his first day of celebrating mass as our new chaplain.
Unlike other priests who will preach for close to one hour, this new priest sermon was just clear and brief.
He finished preaching and went back to d altar, students were shocked and they started murmuring cos that was really fast.

He didn't even mention indecent dressing and adultery amongst students and he was done with his preaching ? Wow ... Students will really like this new priest.

wetin u still de skul de do

AdeniyiA:

mellow down bro, no vex abeg. do

the thing pain me ni...
Pastors commercialising the gospel for their personal benefits.

I went to church today after being away from church for many Sundays. It was independence service and we sang the national anthem... I was excited... Been a very long time I sang the national anthem.

MadCow1:



[b]You just got suckered....



Na so one Pastor say make all the unemployed youths for church come out for special holy ghost approved and blood of Jesus soaked prayers.. See race wey everybody tear.. Even my guy wey dey self employed as a mobile Gala re - distributor (traffic sector) rush come out.. Na ehn pastor bring out this big 4 litre jerry can of olive oil start to speak in tongues.. Kai, the whole guys for front don enter spirit mode sef dey shake..

Next thing I hear na; "The spirit of God has always operated by faith.. I see a lot of oil company jobs." Like 7 guys don already fall under oil company anointing before the Pastor talk finish sef..

"I see 4 people working in Abu Dhabi and Qatar".. Omo like 20 people don fall on top the 4 jobs.. One girl sef start to do like snake for ground.

"Sherimama Shoki Azonto Kiki ma. . I see employment letters entering people mail boxes. NNPC and Chevron letters.. Dated next week Tuesday. . I see it.. Yes Lord. . You are forever faithful. . Rabasaka kekerima. It's coming... its coming .. Yes Lord. ..." Omo like two guys start to do back flip. . Like half the crowd dey ground by now dey roll..

Next thing I hear na.. "O faith .. O ye of little faith.. The Lord says you must show faith that is even smaller than a mustard seed.. Think of your preferred salary and write it on a piece of paper now.. Something Extra miraculous is about to happen here.. Thank you Lord. ." Omo everybody wey dey ground don stand up sharply start to collect paper and pen from ushers.

Everybody dey write 500 thousand, 1 million.. 1.5 million a month, 5 million sef..

Na ehn pastor position the jerry can of olive oil come tell them to write their name and email on top.

Next thing we hear na; "The Lord says you should take a bold step of faith and pay your tithes now on this salary now and test him.. " all the ushers don show with P.O.S machine o.. "Go and borrow money and pay this tithe and wait for your miracle. . "


Omo.. I bust laff for where I dey.. How you wan pay tithe for 1 million naira salary wey you never see? See as guys sad..




Till date, nobody don see one job exam invite talkless of work.. [/b]

my guy U don kill me finish. I don die for laugh

Richy4:


I know before he gave you that money, He knew how much it worth.

Now go and tell him that the guy you bought it from said yours was a sample product and the last one. that now the original price is 200k.

And do not ask for this kind of ridiculous help next time. if you don't know how to tell lies, u better keep it real. and tell your pastor to stay away from good Phones

Thanks man but that was just a joke. I wouldn't even spend that amount of money on a phone and if I was to do that, it will definitely not be an iphone

nothing happened yet

na evening mass I de prepare

Interesting? Yes, they shared rice with big meat and malt.

Why are churches these days all about money? No message of salvation, deliverance, recovery, repentance, restitution etc. In early 90s as a growing up boy, u went to church happy and came back deeply sober, sometime the message breaks people down and you hear people crying and sobbing as the message sank deep into people's heart and soul. Those were the era when going to church held meaning to everyone. You were sure of doing self assessment every Sunday to know your stand with God, because Rapture was emphasized in every church service. Today, all you hear is BLESSING and Prosperity and favour as though God cannot be served for Nothing. I has made many of us hate going to church, I last saw a church near 2 years now. I hate where pastors or whatever they call themselves teach people that the basis of serving God is to prosper. The richest people I know of don't even go to church and are rhey cursed by God? I believe that serving God is an unconditional thing, in sickness and In health, in poverty and in riches, whether you stay in a mansion or under the bridge etc. Price tags should not be attached to serving God, it is a self less act.

alberto2k:
One lady from the choir was staring at me from time to time

Maybe her favourite colour is blue, cuz I was in all blue everything

I hate chelshiiit tho!

Oya Come Chop Your Slap!!!

TheIROKO:
wetin u still de skul de do

project student.

MadCow1:



[b]You just got suckered....



Na so one Pastor say make all the unemployed youths for church come out for special holy ghost approved and blood of Jesus soaked prayers.. See race wey everybody tear.. Even my guy wey dey self employed as a mobile Gala re - distributor (traffic sector) rush come out.. Na ehn pastor bring out this big 4 litre jerry can of olive oil start to speak in tongues.. Kai, the whole guys for front don enter spirit mode sef dey shake..

Next thing I hear na; "The spirit of God has always operated by faith.. I see a lot of oil company jobs." Like 7 guys don already fall under oil company anointing before the Pastor talk finish sef..

"I see 4 people working in Abu Dhabi and Qatar".. Omo like 20 people don fall on top the 4 jobs.. One girl sef start to do like snake for ground.

"Sherimama Shoki Azonto Kiki ma. . I see employment letters entering people mail boxes. NNPC and Chevron letters.. Dated next week Tuesday. . I see it.. Yes Lord. . You are forever faithful. . Rabasaka kekerima. It's coming... its coming .. Yes Lord. ..." Omo like two guys start to do back flip. . Like half the crowd dey ground by now dey roll..

Next thing I hear na.. "O faith .. O ye of little faith.. The Lord says you must show faith that is even smaller than a mustard seed.. Think of your preferred salary and write it on a piece of paper now.. Something Extra miraculous is about to happen here.. Thank you Lord. ." Omo everybody wey dey ground don stand up sharply start to collect paper and pen from ushers.

Everybody dey write 500 thousand, 1 million.. 1.5 million a month, 5 million sef..

Na ehn pastor position the jerry can of olive oil come tell them to write their name and email on top.

Next thing we hear na; "The Lord says you should take a bold step of faith and pay your tithes now on this salary now and test him.. " all the ushers don show with P.O.S machine o.. "Go and borrow money and pay this tithe and wait for your miracle. . "


Omo.. I bust laff for where I dey.. How you wan pay tithe for 1 million naira salary wey
you never see? See as guys sad..




Till date, nobody don see one job exam invite talkless of work.. [/b]

Hehehehehe, *falls down from on top oga*...una no go kill me for nairaland, which one rabaska azonto again, lol

kika23:
I didn't attend service today

why

eldoradoxx:
Why are churches these days all about money? No message of salvation, deliverance, recovery, repentance, restitution etc. In early 90s as a growing up boy, u went to church happy and came back deeply sober, sometime the message breaks people down and you hear people crying and sobbing as the message sank deep into people's heart and soul. Those were the era when going to church held meaning to everyone. You were sure of doing self assessment every Sunday to know your stand with God, because Rapture was emphasized in every church service. Today, all you hear is BLESSING and Prosperity and favour as though God cannot be served for Nothing. I has made many of us hate going to church, I last saw a church near 2 years now. I hate where pastors or whatever they call themselves teach people that the basis of serving God is to prosper. The richest people I know of don't even go to church and are rhey cursed by God? I believe that serving God is an unconditional thing, in sickness and In health, in poverty and in riches, whether you stay in a mansion or under the bridge etc. Price tags should not be attached to serving God, it is a self less act.

Come to catholic church, the one and only true church

krall:
Farano which church?

Wait let me remember




April, 2008
Pastor said all the single ladies come out to the altar for prayers...
Battalion of pretty and non pretty ones flooded like ants.
Then he said all the single men come out.... They also did..

All of them stood there gazing and "eyeing" one sister or the other and expecting a session of hot prayers to start, when the pastor looked.. and looked... and looked.... and out of anger said "infact, ushers ensure that no man here leaves without a woman!!!! also make sure every woman should select one man here and befriend!!!
How will we have fine women in this church and these men will still marry outside."

Commotion ensured and Two sisters in the choir ran and grabbed brother taiwo who previously gave a testimony of acquiring a brand new duplex in an estate in lekki...

eleyi igidi gan

farano:
Here's mine. Towards the end of the service, the man of God said 20 ladies should come out and receive special blessing. Mehn come see race for inside church . We were more than 100 that came out o. Then after the prayer, he told some ladies to go back to their seats and selected few of us. I started wondering, "what's this man up to"?

Sharply, He brought out books written by him and CDs produced by him and told us to go round the church and sell them You can't say no now after receiving blessing from him . We did just what he said. Chai! I almost stumbled in the church today...Which kind new style be this one?

Ur useless. Islamised goon like u
Some f00lish christians that doesn't know whom they r in Christ have joined you making mock of pastors.

This happens everyday in church! The pastor's countenance is that type that hardly smiles and you find hard to differentiate between whether he is angry or happy!

He usually bashes the tithe defaulters strongly whenever it is time! Calling them cheats & thieves in an Igala phrase that is extreme and very very derogatory - "Obala Degwu."

Hilarious in each occurence but very disrespectful! Some of the defaulters take it lightly, others don't! He on the other hand is very serious about it!

Lol @ comments

IYANGBALI:
62. You no dey mess?sidon there dey pose

How you go dey mess for church Kon dey happy.

Agrika:

Come to catholic church, the one and only true church

Not true. It reeks of idolatry & worship of non-living things.
Same thing as these new guys.
Catholics worship the dead & statues, the new guys worship money.

Same ol, same ol

farano:
Here's mine. Towards the end of the service, the man of God said 20 ladies should come out and receive special blessing. Mehn come see race for inside church . We were more than 100 that came out o. Then after the prayer, he told some ladies to go back to their seats and selected few of us. I started wondering, "what's this man up to"?

Sharply, He brought out books written by him and CDs produced by him and told us to go round the church and sell them You can't say no now after receiving blessing from him . We did just what he said. Chai! I almost stumbled in the church today...Which kind new style be this one?

That is what happens when u worship in a business center