Should I Confront My Wife? - Family - Nairaland
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| Should I Confront My Wife? by jarkbauer: 6:05am On Nov 13, 2014 |
This morning I went through my wife phone and I noticed an abnormal thing. Normally I don't touch her phone. I noticed she was chatting with one particular guy. From the contents of the chat I knew it was a new relationship. I guess The guy had being asking her out for long but she just giving him chance. I also noticed the words 'dear' 'love' are used freely. I am really shocked because I didn't expect this from her. Anyway should confront her to explain whats going on? There is nothing tangible I can use to hold her but using the words hi love hi dear etc raises a red flagFrom the chat I knew the guy is very loaded more loaded than me. Also the guy is married but talked badly about his wife and kids. |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by freshness2020: 6:08am On Nov 13, 2014 |
...when I see all these my hope of getting married gets weakened! 30 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by RoyalRoy(m): 6:14am On Nov 13, 2014 |
Its your home, your wife and your marriage. Do what you must do ASAP. No need having to come online to ask us what to do. Confront her and ask her for explanations if you don't feel okay with all the stuff you read!! No need "suffering" in silence. A married woman flirting around?  8 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by bigass(f): 6:15am On Nov 13, 2014 |
If I were you, I will create an avenue to bring out the worst in her. Do not confront her now as this will only make her hide things just act as if u didn't see nothing. However reduce your level of care so that she have more justification in her foolish mind to go all the way then you will know what your wife is capable of. 6 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 6:16am On Nov 13, 2014 |
All dis husband and wife issues don tire me sef..... Why do ppo keep on commiting adultery heh...... Now, just a while ago, it was the husband dat was cheating, now in another post, it is d wife... Infact, yall should be stoned to death to serve as a deterrent....lol 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 6:16am On Nov 13, 2014 |
bigass:how do u mean by creatin an avenue to bring out the worst in her 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Realist5: 6:20am On Nov 13, 2014 |
If she is truly ur wife and not gf, my brother you have to confront her or else story will change. It's now that u have the evidence. if she delete the chats, she will turn everything on ur head that u r accusing her. she will even start shedding Crocodile tears. U know what women can do... 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by coolzeal(m): 6:25am On Nov 13, 2014 |
I am not married neither am I Dr Phil but wish to say something. Listen before you do anything think about it your married; so what is the most important thing to your wife? Happiness. What you need to find out is if she is happy in your marriage before thinking about infidelity. You were not wrong in reading her messages and there should never be anything to hide in a marriage. Talk it out and see what happens. 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by jarkbauer: 6:31am On Nov 13, 2014 |
From the chat I knew the guy is very loaded more loaded than me. Maybe money is the attraction or the bait. |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by cococandy(f): 6:36am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer:are you afraid  ?1 Like |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 6:37am On Nov 13, 2014 |
Did you catch her in another man's arms??Seriously itz just a chat,some ladies can say all that without meaning anything,do u want me to show you screen grabs of some of my chats that some ladies use that for me?As far as you have not caught her in another man's arms,she is 100percent innocent 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Daguccizgreat(m): 6:37am On Nov 13, 2014 |
It's so bad dat some women change in marriage up to the point of calling another man HI LOVE wen ya husband is still alive and hearty. Thunder Wey go fire her go do press up well well the day I get to knw abt her escapade with the man |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by beeevan: 6:38am On Nov 13, 2014 |
Oga go and work on your marriage, you have to nip this in the bud when 'the do' probably hasn't been done. Snap her out of that fantasy fast and start rebuilding what's broken in your relationship . 7 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by beeevan: 6:40am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer: Are you being the husband that you should be or do you assume that it's just about money? |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by jarkbauer: 6:41am On Nov 13, 2014 |
edozie04: Maybe you are the one 7 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Lordabas: 6:42am On Nov 13, 2014 |
This is where the heart and head begin to battle. You know in your head what to do but now the heart comes in and you actually care for her. You have to make a decision  1 Like |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by RoyalRoy(m): 6:44am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer: Stop That !!!!! Don't think along that line. You are already giving your wife justifications to cheat on you. What has your financial strength got to do with her actions? Snap out of it Mr. Bauer. Don't let your financial strength reduce you to a second fiddle in your home. She knew your financial ability before marrying you. So don't even go there. Confront her and leave no room for any "rich toaster" to distabilise your home. Women get carried away once a while... You need to pull her back before she slips beyond the line. Good luck. 14 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by ammyluv2002(f): 6:45am On Nov 13, 2014 |
bigass:Really? I think, he should increase his level of care/love to get the main reason she's acting up cause not showing her care will be a motivating factor to continue and she might use it as an excuse. |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by RoyalRoy(m): 6:49am On Nov 13, 2014 |
edozie04: Really? A married woman referring to a married man with Hi Love ? Will you accept that from your wife sir? 4 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by jarkbauer: 6:55am On Nov 13, 2014 |
RoyalRoy: Thanks for this but I am not giving excuses but providing probable reasons why may plan to cheat. Neither am I ready to play second fiddle. She actually disgusts me right now and my plan is to chase out of my house like bigass said I will give her reasons to go on and cheat. Whether I like it or not I believe she will cheat when the time is right. 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by bigass(f): 7:02am On Nov 13, 2014 |
ammyluv2002: A virtuous woman will never consider cheating under any circumstances instead she might report her husband to those he respects. Not forming an unholy relationship with other men. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by RoyalRoy(m): 7:07am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer: I understand how angry and mad you are right now with her. But please don't do anything silly and irrational. Hear her out first, know the reason why she is flirting around with a married man. Don't rush to conclude that she will eventually cheat. You are the captain of this ship... Stare it out of troubled waters.... Dont jump ship at the sight of a storm ahead. Good luck once again!!! 4 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 7:07am On Nov 13, 2014 |
RoyalRoy:I know we are all human beings but at times we just have to not read too much meaning into things,to me as far as I have not caught her red handed she is innocent 3 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by seunlayi(m): 7:07am On Nov 13, 2014 |
your home may be heading to the rock, better in impregnate her and made her useless for that thief. 8 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 7:09am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer:maybe,maybe not |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by beeevan: 7:09am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer: Chase her out of the house over a text message? It's obvious the kind of husband you have been. Chase her out and do it fast  .5 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by oladunwo(m): 7:13am On Nov 13, 2014 |
This life is a full of competition. I will advise u not to confront her yet, instead u increase ur care, love and affection towards her. When u do that, she will wanna have a change of mind about the new man coz no woman one would like to leave uncertainty for certainty. Sir, fight for ur home not by quarreling or beating but by intensifying ur ways of showing love. I believe with all these, she would talk to herself that "what else do I want".. thank you 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 7:17am On Nov 13, 2014 |
Men; always associating their wives' bad attitude to their financial strength or the lack thereof. When will you people realise that not everything is about money huh? OP, confront your wife and demand an explanation for those chats. Talk it over like the couple that you are. If she says the chats are meaningless, tell her you are not comfortable with it and sternly demand it stops. The way I see it, they are prolly not cheating yet, at least, not physically. But attraction and emotional cheating is just as dangerous if left untamed. Some people think they've got it under control till they find themselves at that point of no return. Knowing where to draw the line is very important. Please nip this in the bud before it becomes stories that touch. By the way, how come NL is the first to know about your marital concerns and not even your spouse? Shows a total lack of communication between you and wifey. Something seems fundamentally wrong here. Is there more going on in this marriage? You might want to tackle the root cause of all this and start rebuilding your marriage from there. Good luck. 12 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by bigass(f): 7:17am On Nov 13, 2014 |
Let the relationship blossom to a particular direction. Then call the guy ask for his address. Tell him you know what he's planning to do with your wife and there's no need to hide it. Then take your wife and drop her in his house. Then call her parents to know how they will return your dowry 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 7:17am On Nov 13, 2014 |
What a pity. Kids get married everyday. See myopic reasoning everywhere. Tufia. 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by Nobody: 7:26am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer: Oh oh! Here I was, thinking you had the slightest understanding about what marriage is about. You want to chase her out cos of "hi dear, hello love" chat? Association of Bored Nairaland Teenagers (ABNT) dey ginger you abi? Please go ahead Nna. Chase her out ASAP. Come back in 6 months and tell us just how sweet it is to be divorced over such an issue.  2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Confront My Wife? by princesstemi(f): 7:50am On Nov 13, 2014 |
jarkbauer:I will advise you to ask her bt in a cool manner, than keeping it in your mind thinking negative things abt this issue. Might not be what u thinking anyway, ask her and free your mind the gud luck1 Like |
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