Edusouls:
shut up guys,this girl lied and deceived this man into marrying her,hahaha girls are very smart and super cunning.. lies will always be found out no matter how long it takes, if she was so honest why didn't she tell him the event that happened to her at age 4 before assuring the guy she is a virgin.and that story she told about what happened to her at age 4 is another smart and cover up lie to smooth things up, all is chains of lies reaction that produce different lies, kai women can deceive
more than the serpent himself,are we sure
that eve was not the one that even deceived serpent at eden?

Lol,guys and ladies virginity. Its right for u not to be a virgin but it's wrong for the lady not to be? Abi? Deceive ni deceive ko. We ladies we will start looking for virgin guys too. Atlest the cheating will stop

This should help.

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Health / The Hymen: A Membrane
Widely Misunderstood

Really? I'm sorry Op i don't believe you either. If your story is anything to go by, then every akwuna benin will tell us a story of how she was raped by her neighbor when she was 4 years old. Every experienced man can tell the difference between a girl who's new to sex and one who's experienced no matter how hard you try to fake it. He can tell by her discomfort, sensitivity to touch, reaction when penetrated whether bloody or not and her attitude after. It's only logical to assume that you were a little bit too professional to be considered a virgin hence your husband's disappointment. Honestly, i share the same sentiment with your husband. I think you're not being entirely honest with him but i may be wrong. Goodluck

franksam2009:
are û blind? she said she was raped at age 4, so she was never a virgin.

Lol. U should av read my post a lil bit more carefully. Theres no need for insults..
By the way... No, i am not blind

Your husband is a mo*ron and an educated illiterate who probably married you only because you said you were a virgin. I didn't bleed either my first time. In fact little blood came the next day. That is why I laugh at the people obsessed with virginity. What if their whole vision of Virgins does not go as planned. How can one really tell who is a virgin or not? Not everyone bleeds and the blood sef is not as much as one would think.

A lot of athletes have even torn their hymen too. Virginity obsessed men, over to you.

tell your man to become a muslim and to commit suicide attack...the 12 virgins wey allah go givam go compensate. for dey i hope say ei no go want check the bleeding because allah no go like that attitude of doubting the authenticity of his virgins. some men are very stupid

madone:
4get the virgin wahala dear if husband loves u he ll remain ur man virgin story or no virgin story

I don't really think that it is more about her been a virgin or not, but rather about trust. Most men don't care if their wife is a virgin and contrary to what you read online, majority of men would prefer a non-virgin, at least let someone else take care of the blood mess before they take ownership.

His husband must have felt that the wife purposely miss lead him and since he loved her (based on her story), he is lost why she even told her the unnecessary lies of been a virgin in the first place. This will make the husband to find it difficult to trust her or would try to independently vet her, going forward.

She should talk to the husband and tell her what her mother narrated.

I've no idea, plz experts with broad experiences should kindly enlighten us with practical prove...on

jaelz:
I'm a young girl of 28 years. I'm married to a lovely husband that loves me so much but my problem is this. I married my hubby as a virgin but the first time we made love, he was expecting to see blood which he didn't and since then he has been accusing me of telling him lies about being a virgin.
I asked few of my friends and they told me that yes that blood is suppose to be a proof to that. I became more confused as I know deep down in me that am saying the truth. I confided in my mother and she told me the story of my life.
My mum said that when I was 4years old that our tenant called me into his room to come and take toys. The next thing she saw when I came out from the man's room was blood coming out from my vagina.
Immediately she called my father and they went to meet the man and lo and behold he had ran away. My problem now is should I explain to my hubby all this? Will he still love me? My readers please i need your honest advice.

this is super story...make i hear word joo who do u want to foul here u have had se x or u do marsterbet stop that rubish story ur cooking here...

linearity:

I don't really think that it is more about her been a virgin or not, but rather about trust. Most men don't care if their wife is a virgin and contrary to what you read online, majority of men would prefer a non-virgin, at least let someone else take care of the blood mess before they take ownership.

His husband must have felt that the wife purposely miss lead him and since he loved her (based on her story), he is lost why she even told her the unnecessary lies of been a virgin in the first place. This will make the husband to find it difficult to trust her or would try to independently vet her, going forward.

She should talk to the husband and tell her what her mother narrated.

you re rit dear.@ Op just tell him the story wit ur sincere heart love will and God ll defend ur innocence

rexkexmilan:
Your husband must have come from mercury for him to expect to marry a virgin. At this 21 century??

well my brother there are thousands ofvirgin around u. I married a virgin even when i never wanted to. So u better change your believe system my good friend.

OP My Sister i am not blaming your husband but it is either he is not exposed or he doent love you or he love claim isbased on ur virginty claim which is shallow mindedness.
As others have said before me; not every woman that bleeds on the day of their firt sex. What is even the size of his d*ck? U should know if one has a not real big it might not make a woman bleed. Another thing isthis; if u rvery well wet before sex, u might not also bleed.
Take him to a counselor... He needs oe.

i really do not blame your husband,if he doesn't feel this way,then he is not human,do you know how it feels to be deceived by someone you love....You just have to explain yourself to him so he understands...he loves you,he is just in pain due to what he percieves as deciet

Rubbish" only in africa dis nonsense is important

We some ladies that don't bleed at all because of some physical activities they are involved in e.g like sports, climbing of trees or hard jobs etc

ashewopeckas:
Give him d usual lie, 'I got disvirgined thru a rigorous exercise'

or someone raped me..

honestly the guy is only being human with his reaction. the lady really have a lot of explanation to give,it will take a long time for things to return to normalcy. my humble opinion.. virginity is like a cherry on cake, without it doesn't mean the cake cant or shouldn't be eaten. and at the Same time I wouldn't want to marry a lady who have had her va.gi.na. bored beyond repair ,making me feel like a head in an oversized cap.

U sure say ur hubby no be vampire, dis one him dey find blood badly. Lol

ur hubby have right to be upset n I think ur mummy should coming in on time b4 is to later,God will sincerely help our marriages, a new nairaland smeone should pls welcome na

if Ur hubby can trust Ur mum I suggest Ur mum should explain wat happened to u @ 4

eminent007:




"Maturer"?
You can do better than that please.
Meanwhile to the writer, ask your virgin-loving, short-sighted myopic hubby if he is a virgin before your first sex together.
Yeye.
Abegi, make e go de lick sour soup. [No insult meant]

Yes, maturer. He is more likely to believe his father, an elderly uncle who has been around or any older person with experience than a young or middle aged medical personnel who has all the medical jargons. When it comes to sensitive matters like this, age and maturity is what they listen to.

AreaFada2:
.

The problem now is that the hubby might consider it a concocted lie by herself and her mum.

This is why parents should explain things to kids when they turn adult, like 18 to 21 years old.
Especially something as serious as this.

I agree wiv u on dt,if she ad bin told am sure she wud av gone 4 text...d mum mess up

jimmy4x:

Are u soooo sure about this, did u conduct a research or u just came up with this by some popular hear-say??

Very sure. Active women may tear their hymen during sporting or strenous activities like riding bikes, riding horses etc. Hymen can be worn away by use of tampons and the like. Its the hymen that bleeds when its and torn. So the absence of the hymen is the absence of bleeding.

smileysmiles:
Now to ur husband.... He married you cos he loved you i suppose (not because you were a virgin) and i assume Trust comes with love?

sounds like buy one get one free... buy love get trust for free....














don't mind me.... I kid alot

guys and gurls the moral of the story is that we should always tell our spouse right from the onset about our sexual history from childhood to adulthood.In the end its more advantageous

jaelz:
I'm a young girl of 28 years. I'm married to a lovely husband that loves me so much but my problem is this. I married my hubby as a virgin but the first time we made love, he was expecting to see blood which he didn't and since then he has been accusing me of telling him lies about being a virgin.
I asked few of my friends and they told me that yes that blood is suppose to be a proof to that. I became more confused as I know deep down in me that am saying the truth. I confided in my mother and she told me the story of my life.
My mum said that when I was 4years old that our tenant called me into his room to come and take toys. The next thing she saw when I came out from the man's room was blood coming out from my vagina.
Immediately she called my father and they went to meet the man and lo and behold he had ran away. My problem now is should I explain to my hubby all this? Will he still love me? My readers please i need your honest advice.

u should have cried when he was fucking you but u didn't...
no tears, no blood, and u want him to bliv u are a virgiiiiin...

call ur mum sharp sharp b4 things get out of hand....

Jaelz....
aii u av come again!!!
u be man or woman?.....making Nlanders comment on ur fabricated imaginations since 1900

no need for ur husband to knw wat happened wen u were 4yrs old.
Not all virgins bleed at 1st intercourse. Let him research on d internet. Your husband shd just take a chill pill and move on.

I wouldn't blame the husband because the lady has made him believe she is a virgin only for him to discover she was not, nothing wrong in marrying a non-virgin since the man did not even claim he is one, but the lady shouldn't have claim to be what she was not

To whom or how do I tell my own story. This virginity is also an issue in my marriage. Though I never discoursed virginity with my husband. But he hunts me every day about my not been a virgin even when I looked like one. I had told him several times to let me be or look for other excuse for his behaviour. Even though I know myself, I don't want to engage in a fight with him on that issue because I know him very well. Is either he does not want to belive his exoerience on our first intercouse or or he just want justify beign a womanizer. I can remember vividly that it was war for him on our first intercourse. though I did not Check for blood didn't even know that blood will come out nobody told me and I was too shy to even look at him or even arround the room and the pains was too much. I was 18yrs old then that was in 1996 just left secondary school. he was 36yrs old then, my father's junior friend and has already ask for his consent to marry me. What am even saying even when I had my first baby it was war every where was tight my virgina was so tight my nipiple was so flat that the baby has nothing to hold to suck breast even the nurses scolded him for not doing a good job on me. Though I undersand that cos we were not living together then he traveled out when I became pregnant and returned as soon as am about to give birth. So we didn't have enough time together. This is our 17th yrs in marriage with 4 children 3 boys and a girl and he is still bringing up virginity in our quarrel I sincerely belive he is cheating on me and is looking for some excuse to justify his lifestly, if not only last 2yrs he told me that my body has relaxed he can now have sex easily with me and I noticed it too. See I vowed in my life that I will never have sex with more than one man in my lifetime christianity aside is just a matter of decision. I sometimes imagin why he bring up virginity issue any time we are quarreling though am not bothered that much cos they say clear conscience fear no accusation, but I just imagine some times. My story is long jare let me stop here.

freeboy604:
The husband has every right to have felt disappointed, even though the husband did not married her because she was a virgin he was very proud that his wife was a Virgin based on what his wife told him which would have strengthen their bond/trust, now that it turn out to be the opposite he is looking and thinking of is this how we are going to continue with a relationship that is supposed to be everlasting? He is a human being and as it is now, I will advice you allow your mother do the explanation to him, that you were not told on till this issue came up, with time he will overcome this challenge. God bless.

You have a very logical reasoning..that's good ! Don't mind the first dumb poster

Still I would be really disappointed in a man that values your virginity higher than you.

[/quote]
Don't ever venture into studying law,you wount do well in it...u aint logical n can't comprehend simple sentence..no offfence

smileysmiles:


I understand u. We r all human... nobody wants to be scammed or made to look like a fool but not everywoman bleeds on her first night.. she sould have been one of them.

First night how ?