byvan03:
Don't confront her so you don't chase her into his waiting arms, just keep praying and showing her more love .

tugar:


wouldn't it be divine intervention ? so I should know where I stand,how can you be with a woman while her heart is somewhere else

keepingmum:
the best way is to wear red pyant and singlet, preferably lacey ones. also remember to pray and fast. Shave your armpit and anuuss. Be clean, come home from work early, dont confront her. Pray for her and fight for your marriage

You cant allow a strange exboyfriend to come and dabaru your marriage. Shower your wife with love so that she can see who loves her most between you and the ex

Remember God hates divorce?? and marriage is for better for worse.

raumdeuter:
Dont jump into conclusion based on submission find more concrete and incontrovertible evidence before confronting her

Because if you jump the gun she would only get smarter with it

You can also divorce. Since thats the modern way of doing things

tugar:
which other evidence? I read the messages, she even told the elder sister that the years spent with the husband is a waste

tugar:
what's the best and matured way to treat a suspected unfaithful wife? the suspicion comes from some of her phone messages with her old boy friend. urgent advice needed!

raumdeuter:


You didnt state this before, If she thinks the years spent with you is a waste why hasnt she left you

We should do this the modern way and not the marry by force Nigerian way.

Get divorce papers served to her and tell her you are just helping to release her from more yrs of waste in the marriage

Farmerforlife:


Suspected, or actually unfaithful? It only gets worse. I do not understand why a man or woman would want to remain with an unfaithful spouse. There is little to gain from such a relationship except cummulative headaches. Find a way to seperate amiably and discuss child issues sensibly (to make it easier on the kids). Ten to one, the lover will quickly reject her when she is now hanging on his neck and she will come back begging for a 'second chance'.

But I smh for cheaters. I really dislike reading about people committing adultery. Anyone who cannot restrict his/ her attentions to his/her legally married spouse, has no business being married.

tugar:


she still calls her ex "dear" means a lot , I believe she's still there cos of the stipends she get , trying to know how possible break up will not have much adverse effect on the children,meanwhile I can afford a nanny and driver for them

Farmerforlife:


It is difficult, but it is best to let her go bro. If she is unfaithful, she's not worth the lifelong headache you will find yourself in. Just find yourself a happier marriage when the pain dies down a little. Just make sure your seperation is done in an amicable and mature manner, because of the kids. Don't fight for custody or slander each other in court... just work out an arrangement for who sees them when... I guess she wouldn't have much time for them anyway, in her new found freedom as a sisi, so they would probably end up staying with you much of the time.

Sorry about your plight. A mistrustful marriage can really destabilise what should be a happy home, and for what? Mere passing pleasure, and a stolen orgasm or two, followed by years of regret.

nmreports:
There is really no point confronting her. It could lead to more denial or all sorts.

Be a good man... Watch her keenly till you get to the root of the matter. Either she is cheating on you emotionally, sexually or it's just a one off conversation.

Either way, get to the root of this without suspicion, accusations or attacks.

Watch and be vigilant. Simple.

tugar:
looks like she had made up her mind to move to her ex, she still chat with him and we don't talk cos of my silence attitude towards her.

Dyt:



You know why I am laughing?
Cos I sense she's paying back

tugar:


Dyt this platform is a faceless one ,I assumed that's the reason u say anything u like, paying back for what? for her being in my house? moving up and down to fulfill my responsibilities as a husband and father?

Dyt:


That's not what I mean
I don't support her cheating either
But I am a woman
And from your write uo
You have been with her for years
Even have 4kids
No complaints
If complaints starts popping up now
Then there's something wrong somewhere

Yes we women are crazy
But we only are mad when pushed
What have you done to her is all I am asking
It's obvious you still want her and sure you can revive your union

I may be really small to you in everyway but I am a woman and to some extent I reason like an old one


So sorry if my previous post made you a bit angry
I act like a baby most times

tugar:


OK Dyt, something might have gone wrong right? Or she might have been pushed? is it a crime seeking for a greener pasture elsewhere to take care of ur family? can't she support the hubby by at least pray for him than to indulge in that cos of his absence.

Yomieluv:
no better to treat her than gather concrete evidence, then kick her azz out..

A cheating wife is dangerous, because women are emotional being, the ex can sway her to do the unthinkable.

Better be ready to count your loss when divorce sets in.

greatgod2012:




But a cheating husband like you is not dangerous



@op jare, you're the one I want to talk to.......
What do you think has gone wrong, because from your previous post, you people have 4 lovely kids together and I'm sure it couldn't be like that from the beginning, something must have gone wrong.

Why don't you confront her and let her know how you feel by that act of betrayal of hers and ask what she really want, whether she want to stay with you or the ex and mean every word that comes out of your mouth while speaking with her.

Waiting and playing dumb till when there's concrete evidence might be mere wasting of time, and what concrete evidence are you even waiting for with what already with you?

If after the discussion, it seems her mind is made up to leave you, then, please, free her. An unfaithful spouse is dangerously deadly.

May God help you.

Dyt:


That's not what I mean
I don't support her cheating either
But I am a woman
And from your write uo
You have been with her for years
Even have 4kids
No complaints
If complaints starts popping up now
Then there's something wrong somewhere

Yes we women are crazy
But we only are mad when pushed
What have you done to her is all I am asking
It's obvious you still want her and sure you can revive your union

I may be really small to you in everyway but I am a woman and to some extent I reason like an old one


So sorry if my previous post made you a bit angry
I act like a baby most times