While we dated she rarely called her mum and vice versa . Then all of a sudden 2 years after marriage her mum calls more than thrice a day and duration of at least a call lasts for 1 to 2 hours usually from 9 pm . The annoying part is most times its at night when my wife and I are supposed to be share our thoughts. Most times these calls usually ends in sending my wife on errands that piss me off. Is this normal/OK?

What's wrong in a mother calling her daughter

But this your own case is abnormal

kwb567:
While we dated she rarely called her mum and vice versa . Then all of a sudden 2 years after marriage her mum calls more than thrice a day and duration of at least a call lasts for 1 to 2 hours usually from 9 pm . The annoying part is most times its at night when my wife and I are supposed to be share your thoughts. Most times these calls usually ends in sending my wife on errands that piss me off. Is this normal/OK?

For her to be calling her mother often means that you are not her close confidant. You lack that basic skill to be her confidant, little wonder she is confiding in her mum instead.

There's nothing wrong with a mother calling her child.
I'm sure if it was your own mother and she complains, you would say your wife doesn't like her.
If their conversation disturbs You, please politely tell her to go and receive her calls in the sitting room or guest room.
Life isn't hard. If you guys want to discuss something important, come home as early as you can to do so, or if you don't mind having your sleep disturbed, wake her up in the middle of the night to do so.

MhizzAJ:
What's wrong in a mother calling her daughter

But this your own case is abnormal

It isn't wrong for a mother to call. But we all go to work and I get back after meal the only time I have to discuss with my wife, ask her how her day was her mum calls and the conversation lasts for mor than 1 hour. At that time I usually sleep off. There is a communication gap my wife and I feel it is a recipe for disaster.

TheArchangel:
For her to be calling her mother often means that you are not her close confidant. You lack that basic skill to be her confidant, little wonder she is confiding in her mum instead.

And what does it take.

Everyday

Rukkydelta:
Everyday

Everyday

You dey lucky say you be man...
You wouldn't have liked all the "women hate themselves" and "DILs always trying to separate a man from his mother" comment that would have taken over this thread by now.

Allow your wife and her mother talk please!

If it's so bad, face your wife...not NL.

The duration of an hour - two is not the issue here I guess, the concern is the timing right? Maybe you can get your wife to call her mum before you get back from work so they discuss and conclude and she can be 'available' for you when you need her.
I used to talk with my mum a lot too after I got married so I guess it's common especially among 1st daughters and their momma. Now that mine is late na me and my mother in law o, once I am back from work, we will talk sotey one person's battery will run flat.
Take heart ehn!

pocohantas:
You dey lucky say you be man...
You wouldn't have liked all the "women hate themselves" and "DILs always trying to separate a man from his mother" comment that would have taken over this thread by now.

Allow your wife and her mother talk please!

If it's so bad, face your wife...not NL.

Welcome back...

Heavy punch below the belt...

It is not right in this situation. There must be a balance. Her mother shouldn't be calling that often and staying that long on the phone. She is intruding in their time together.

She might be trying to check on her daughter and see that she is ok but she should realize that her daughter's duty,attention and time is first to her husband because they are now one and she should give them space. She has relinquished full rights to her daughter and handed it to the husband.

The daughter herself should let her mum understand that she cannot stay that long on the phone. Little by little these loops will affect their marriage. Little hinges swing huge doors.

Try spend more time with your wife and let her know without fighting her that she is spending too much time with her mum.

The timing is wrong, every husband deserves that time after work to chill with wifey so i'll advice you to talk to her about it, but mind your words so she will understand its the timing not her mom..

Whenever she's on the phone with her mom, pick your phone, move to the next room and speak with your mom or elder sister.

If you have problems with the way she communicates with her people, it means you've not been speaking with your own people as often as needed.

When you both get tired of making 2hrs call with nothing else to say, you both will come together again

gechyy2:
The timing is wrong, every husband deserves that time after work to chill with wifey so i'll advice you to talk to her about it, but mind your words so she will understand its the timing not her mom..

Gbam

It only means she's confiding in her.If you've not been engaging in meaningful comm. with her,she'll find someone to talk to,thank God it's even her mum not social media/friends.Nature abhors vacuum

She's telling you indirectly that something is lacking in your marriage.

Companionship. Some couples take themselves too serious. They don't laugh together they don't joke or have fun. She's probably not comfortable with you either.

you no welloooo. na mama na....if na papa I for suspect

The timing is wrong, especially the long hours spent on the call...You should be able to have the "us" time.
Is there an issue at her maiden home?? Cos whenever I spend long hours talking to my mum, there's either a party planning or she wants get me involved with something at home sort of and it's an occasional thing.
Perhaps she feels you are not a good companion enough.
Try talk to her, let her know she has an obligation as a wife, mother and daughter and she should balance it well, tell her you miss her attention..you've been apart for hours so you miss her.. make her want to talk to you more( you guys know how to go about it now, the love me button).

Communicate with her.
all the best

kwb567:
While we dated she rarely called her mum and vice versa . Then all of a sudden 2 years after marriage her mum calls more than thrice a day and duration of at least a call lasts for 1 to 2 hours usually from 9 pm . The annoying part is most times its at night when my wife and I are supposed to be share our thoughts. Most times these calls usually ends in sending my wife on errands that piss me off. Is this normal/OK?

Are u jealous?
women talk a lot
U can have two sisters on the phone for hours
Hopefully her mum is a good mother that can help ur marriage
Your wife need to manage her time
don't blame your mother in-law

As often as she wants to.

every day!

As much as she likes .... Any problem with that ?..

E be like say lala don marry o
Na so so marriage issues dem dey push go front page everyday

I’m not married yet and not sure if I will so no comments on the topic

Every night? Errand? Oho.... Thank God I know how to silence my phone.

next time you put your fingers to work, by the time you explore certain regions.....she will hang up

Call her mother?
She's already married, she's no longer. Kid.
Frequently calls may lead sometimes to negative advice. Therefore, it's not necessary

kwb567:
While we dated she rarely called her mum and vice versa . Then all of a sudden 2 years after marriage her mum calls more than thrice a day and duration of at least a call lasts for 1 to 2 hours usually from 9 pm . The annoying part is most times its at night when my wife and I are supposed to be share our thoughts. Most times these calls usually ends in sending my wife on errands that piss me off. Is this normal/OK?

Share thoughts or you ...&$%&? Be honest. lol.

after exhausting her sub on chatting

Anytime