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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Health / I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... (25247 Views)
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I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Nobody: 9:50am On Nov 26, 2017 |
I have chronic OCD coupled with other mental issues like ADHD, chronic depression, extreme anxiety, bipolar, Low self-esteem, Perfectionism(OCPD similar to OCD) and the Fantasy Disorder (i waste hours fantasizing about a character rich fantasy world i have created in my head for almost a decade now) and (i don't know) i think i'm autistic... It kills me inside... I have contemplated suicide but i'm afraid it will be too painful or unsuccessful (since firearms are not sold in this country)... My mental issues started when i was around 5 years (or maybe since child birth)... My depression heightened during my secondary education at a military secondary school (Nigerian Navy Port Harcourt). I stay in Port Harcourt and school in the University of Port Harcourt (Uniport)... I'm repeating my final year because my mental issues did not allow me focus on my project and two difficult Maths courses.. i find it hard to focus (ADHD) and study... If i am not battling with that ever present inner OCD voice, I'm fantasizing about another world inside my head... Everybody thinks i'm rude because i am never smiling and i don't know how to talk to or reply people (I'm always anxious even when i'm familiar with the person trying to talk to me)... no matter how i try i will always say something awkward or I wouldn't be able to say anything at all (my heart will always seem to be racing and my speech stuttering)... So i just detach myself from people generally to save myself from embarrassment... What my OCD and OCPD has obsessed and compelled me to do over the years is just so much i can't write all about it here... It's more than the regular "wash your hand before and after you touch anything if not you will be infected or fall sick" or "if you press the wrong letter while typing a document, you must clear the whole page and start again if not the document file will be corrupted"]... If ever i try to resist the OCD voice, I'll feel so uncomfortable, anxious, disturbed and drowsy... i won't be able to concentrate on anything at all... Also, it has made me abusive to my younger brother... If he does something I(or the OCD rather) don't(doesn't) like ... Example, if he doesn't wash his hand before touching things in our room or doesn't follow a couple of sequence i normally carry out while cleaning our room... i get so angry, i yell or sometimes(rarely though) physically abuse him... Any little thing he does irritates me even if he is just playing music, making a call or even laughing at a joke he read on his phone... This makes me hate myself but i can't stop this behavior... Side note:[I have nothing against Christians or religious people... Please, don't be offended] I recently stop believing in religion (Christianity in my case)... I see it as a mechanism implemented to make people behave and make people be motivated to live and enjoy life... I also don't identify as an atheist because most atheist these days are just religious about their non-believe... They will undoubtedly support theories like The Big Bang Theory and yet criticizes Christians for believing in the Creation Story... I don't believe both of the aforementioned theories(stories)... I can say I'm agnostic because i do not know about the origin of existence.. Although, when i was still an ardent Christian, my OCD voice will compel me to give large portions of my personal savings to "God" so that i'll receive a specific blessing or answer to a prayer request... lol... I have not talked to anyone about my issues because i know they will not understand... during my secondary school days, i told my parents i was contemplating suicide... they beat me up and took me to church for deliverance... lol... so there is no point talking about it to my family... I will appreciate talking to someone who understands... Please reply or email me... Thanks... 18 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Oblongata: 10:00am On Nov 26, 2017 |
I had similar issues once, but my brother would have none of it What you need bro is to socialise Very often Even against your will You also need a steady babe With whom your world revolves Go to social events Church, mosque etc Read lot of novels Then best of all; write a novel about your fantasy Goodluck. 122 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by dominique(f): 11:05am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Only you OCD, ADHD, BD, chronic depression, schizophrenia etc. You are like a ticking time bomb. Sadly we live in a country of people that understand very little about mental health issues. The best solution most of them can provide is you're probably possessed and you should go for deliverance. I suggest you seek therapy with a qualified psychiatrist. I'm sure there are quite a number of them in PHC where you're based. In the meantime, make sure you surround yourself with people to keep your mind busy so you don't entertain suicidal thoughts. 60 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by 40kobo77: 11:36am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Ok |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Nobody: 11:36am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Believe me for coming out here to voice out is 40% solution to the problem at hand. Believe me again the solution to the 60% percent remaining part of the problem is within you and only you can execute it .. Thou the advice from here could be the needed... For me ,the under listed will surely form 40% of the 60% 1. Go out meet more people on a daily 2. Get involved in a relationship with a lady you feel is attractive 3. Enrol in a sporting activity and dont miss out in the routine 4. God is needed without failure for its through him this thread can only turn into a testimony.. 5. Lastly know that you are not the only one in this kind of situation 40 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by jerryunit48: 11:37am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Eya 1 Like
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Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by ivolt: 11:37am On Nov 26, 2017 |
You can't get any help from here. Go out there and find a qualified therapist. 3 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by hoygift(m): 11:37am On Nov 26, 2017 |
That's what we see under this hot weather, our weda follow contribute, incase you are looking for things that contributed to the disorder case... Happy sunday |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Probz(m): 11:38am On Nov 26, 2017 |
You can’t have depression and bipolar disorder at the same time because one’s part of the other. Are these self-diagnosed? 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by BruncleZuma: 11:38am On Nov 26, 2017 |
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ADHD I understand bro...small world and you're not alone. 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by OtemSapien: 11:38am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Visit the psychiatrist 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Hades2016(m): 11:39am On Nov 26, 2017 |
God will help you .... 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Faustin78(m): 11:39am On Nov 26, 2017 |
See a doctor. A psychiatrist actually. And quickly at that. You are in my prayers for God's healing and mercy in Jesus name 22 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Tellemall: 11:40am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Have you considered seeing a psychiatrist? Many people are affected by these things in Nigeria, but are scared to see a specialist for fear of being stigmatized as "insane". Google a hospital that caters to your needs. By the way, how did you come up with your diagnoses? Direct more of that energy to seeing a specialist, preferably a psychiatrist. With a little medication you will feel better, despite how large you think your issues are. Many of the things you mentioned are easily treatable. 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Nobody: 11:40am On Nov 26, 2017 |
dominique: We need to send him to sambisa ASAP!... ![]() 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Nobody: 11:40am On Nov 26, 2017 |
One person head? 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Nobody: 11:40am On Nov 26, 2017 |
You should meet a therapist 5 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by sabanageorge(f): 11:40am On Nov 26, 2017 |
32 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by kullozone(m): 11:41am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Atleast, you "concentrated" to explain your condition... And I also counted 2 "lols", which means you're capable of laughing too, not just anger alone. ![]() 30 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by d33types: 11:41am On Nov 26, 2017 |
LancelLogan: My friend, have you seen an mental health physician? 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by MaconAwire(m): 11:41am On Nov 26, 2017 |
o.p abeg no vex how many una be? for this is way tooo much for 1 head.... 3 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by victorazyvictor(m): 11:42am On Nov 26, 2017 |
LancelLogan: All these only you, you be Satan? 4 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Luukasz(m): 11:42am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Is this an hospital, c'mon bruhv go see your doc and stop being one of those folks who come on social network to seek for help. Where as the best place to get your help is off the social network 1 Like 2 Shares |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by lonelydora: 11:42am On Nov 26, 2017 |
LancelLogan: I'm praying for you in church at the moment 1 Like |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by pol23: 11:43am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Hospital. Drink. Smoke. Sex. Walk Football Cinema. Swim. Sex. Pray. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by iomoge2(f): 11:44am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Chia I feel for you Wish i can help or atleast be your friend ![]() 4 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by grandstar(m): 11:44am On Nov 26, 2017 |
So sorry |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by TheObserver(m): 11:44am On Nov 26, 2017 |
The funny thing is if life is good for u and ur standards, all these won't happen. Socializing and some other things will make u way better. Whatsapp me on 09072665244. Let's talk about it 2 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Nobody: 11:44am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Sadly most people are going through this, I think a psychiatrist will be in the best position to help you 2 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by sistaj: 11:44am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Wow.pls follow @shewriteswoman on instagram and talk to her about your issues.It is a great network for mental illness as the founder deals with mental illness herself.You will get a lot if help from them.There's always a light at the end of the horizon. 8 Likes |
Re: I Have Ocd And Some Other Mental Disorder... I Hate Myself... Please Help... by Damilare6293: 11:45am On Nov 26, 2017 |
Jesus can fix all these things......i am a testimony. all things are possible to anyone who believes.... 7 Likes 1 Share |
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