The modern dating world has a to deal with an unfortunate epidemic – user-friendliness. It happens. People use other people for reasons and motivations that are purely selfish and harmful. To an extent, we all use one another; but it’s another thing when we use people without thinking about how we are treating them. We shouldn’t be treating other people like objects. We are all human beings living individual lives and bearing individual struggles. We all have our own crap that we have to deal with. And we have no right to be seeing other people as persons who are beneath us; as mere stepping stones that we can use to get to where we need to be.

But there are so many user-friendly people in the dating market. These are the ones who get into relationships not to find love, but to find out how much they can milk out of the partners that they’re with. And you shouldn’t be s naïve to think that you’re going to be immune to the harmful effects of such people. You could be victimized at this very moment without even knowing it. Here are 9 signs that your girl is just using you.


1. She’s more interested in how much you make than in what you do for a living.
She doesn’t care about what you’re passionate about in life. She doesn’t care about your hobbies and interests. She doesn’t care about what you do for a living. She only cares about how much you make because she wants to know what she can get out of your salary.


2. She is very demanding when it comes to gifts.
She always wants the most lavish and luxurious gifts. She’s always asking you to get her the shiniest things in the store with the most vulgar price tags. Nothing about her is frugal or subtle. She always wants grand items.

3. You feel like you’re carrying most of the load in the relationship.
She isn’t really doing her part in making sure that your relationship is a sustainable one. She doesn’t really put much effort into making your relationship last – and so you have to take it upon yourself to carry the relationship on behalf of the both of you.

4. She is only ever nice to you when she knows she can get something out of it.
There’s always an ulterior motive. There’s always a hidden agenda. There’s always something fishy going on. She’s never really sincere with you. She’s virtually incapable of being nice to you unless she knows that there’s something in it for her. She’s more interested in what you can give her than she is in just actually being nice to you.


5. The people who care about you tell you that she’s bad news.
There are already rumors that go around about her. She has already been talked about by so many people. She has a reputation for using people in relationships; and she’s probably using you now. You’re probably her latest victim.


6. She makes you feel guilty for asking things of her.
Whenever you take it upon yourself to ask her to do more for your relationship, she is really going to make you feel guilty. She’s really going to make it seem like you’re being unreasonable and that you’re asking too much – even though she asks for so much more from you in return.


7. She acts cold whenever you aren’t able to deliver something she wants.
She really throws a hissy fit whenever you don’t deliver on something that she asks of you. She gets really upset like a genuine spoiled brat. She feels like she’s entitled to everything that she asks from you.


8. She doesn’t really spend a lot of time with you.
She doesn’t spend much time with you because you aren’t really all that important to her. She only gives time to the things she values most in life. And she doesn’t really value you much beyond the things that you are able to give her.


9. She never seems to reciprocate the love and affection that you give her.
You try to connect with her, but she never lets you in. She never opens up. She never allows herself to get vulnerable with you. You get the feeling that she’s always maintaining a kind of distance between the two of you. She’s keeping you at bay.

Final Thoughts
If you find out that your lady is just using you for reasons other than love, you have a choice to make. It’s either you allow yourself to act as her puppet or you call her out on it. Hopefully, you choose the latter. You can’t allow yourself to be used and abused in a relationship like that. You must always make it a point to stand up for yourself; to demand for the love that you think you are deserving of from your significant other.

4. She is only ever nice to you when she knows she can get something out of it.
There’s always an ulterior motive. There’s always a hidden agenda. There’s always something fishy going on. She’s never really sincere with you. She’s virtually incapable of being nice to you unless she knows that there’s something in it for her. She’s more interested in what you can give her than she is in just actually being nice to you.


Nkechi is dis ur plan to me

Actually, all naija ladies are using their guys. Everytin u wrote up there is what d do. They go into a relationship for what they stand to gain. Act broke and see them leave u. They are very selfish. The funniest tin is, even after u give dem all they demand from u, they will still cheat on u. They are prostitues by default.

youngberry001:
4. She is only ever nice to you when she knows she can get something out of it.
There’s always an ulterior motive. There’s always a hidden agenda. There’s always something fishy going on. She’s never really sincere with you. She’s virtually incapable of being nice to you unless she knows that there’s something in it for her. She’s more interested in what you can give her than she is in just actually being nice to you.


Nkechi is dis ur plan to me

lol...run for your dear life my brother

relationship is meant to be partnership, more like 50/50 kinda thing. you shouldn't turn your Bf into an ATM just because he loves you. BTW as a guy when you encounter such a lady, kindly walk outta the relationship.. it's better to be single than to be in a relationship where you act like her father and everything is done by you.
As for the ladies, learn to be kind and generous in your relationship because it's not written down anywhere that a guy must do all the spending in a relationship. if you are looking for an ATM, kindly go out there and work. all this parasitic relationships sef.. mtcheew!!

mimimile93:
Actually, all naija ladies are using their guys. Everytin u wrote up there is what d do. They go into a relationship for what they stand to gain. Act broke and see them leave u. They are very selfish. The funniest tin is, even after u give dem all they demand from u, they will still cheat on u. They are prostitues by default.

bro this hatred isn't really necessary. I understand that some ladies has hurt you sooo badly to the extent that you refused to believe that there are some decent women out there. don't let your anger towards women be cloud your sense of judgement. Time they say heals all wounds, please let it heal you and give you reasons to smile and laugh heartily again!!

Most problem in a relationship comes from the female side although guy too have their own too but ladies are to blame for...

mimimile93:
Actually, all naija ladies are using their guys. Everytin u wrote up there is what d do. They go into a relationship for what they stand to gain. Act broke and see them leave u. They are very selfish. The funniest tin is, even after u give dem all they demand from u, they will still cheat on u. They are prostitues by default.

Eeyah... Why not tell her (them) all these directly instead of pouring out your anger here?

Sorry o

mimimile93:
Actually, all naija ladies are using their guys. Everytin u wrote up there is what d do. They go into a relationship for what they stand to gain. Act broke and see them leave u. They are very selfish. The funniest tin is, even after u give dem all they demand from u, they will still cheat on u. They are prostitues by default.

I've noticed you bruv anything that concern ladies you always have something negative things to say............ not every lady is like ur ex and present and wait don't you have sisters are they like that too?

I'm a lady in a relationship and i'm supporting my guy's hustle so please don't generalize us

EniHolar:


Eeyah... Why not tell her (them) all these directly instead of pouring out your anger here? Sorry o

They are here on NL.


I'm not angry.


It's the truth am sayin.

mimimile93:
Actually, all naija ladies are using their guys. Everytin u wrote up there is what d do. They go into a relationship for what they stand to gain. Act broke and see them leave u. They are very selfish. The funniest tin is, even after u give dem all they demand from u, they will still cheat on u. They are prostitues by default.

can you just stop for a second.every little opportunity u spite all Nigerian women.biko just stop

Michelle55:
relationship is meant to be partnership, more like 50/50 kinda thing. you shouldn't turn your Bf into an ATM just because he loves you. BTW as a guy when you encounter such a lady, kindly walk outta the relationship.. it's better to be single than to be in a relationship where you act like her father and everything is done by you.
As for the ladies, learn to be kind and generous in your relationship because it's not written down anywhere that a guy must do all the spending in a relationship. if you are looking for an ATM, kindly go out there and work. all this parasitic relationships sef.. mtcheew!!

my sister na

Feezah01:


I've noticed you bruv anything that concern ladies you always have something negative things to say............ not every lady is like ur ex and present and wait don't you have sisters are they like that too?

I'm a lady in a relationship and i'm supporting my guy's hustle so please don't generalize us

why stop him from saying what majority women around are like??

Michelle55:
relationship is meant to be partnership, more like 50/50 kinda thing. you shouldn't turn your Bf into an ATM just because he loves you. BTW as a guy when you encounter such a lady, kindly walk outta the relationship.. it's better to be single than to be in a relationship where you act like her father and everything is done by you.
As for the ladies, learn to be kind and generous in your relationship because it's not written down anywhere that a guy must do all the spending in a relationship. if you are looking for an ATM, kindly go out there and work. all this parasitic relationships sef.. mtcheew!!

Good info from a lady. But guess what? They are coming for you in their large numbers. The only thing they are ready to offer you in a relationship is their P****.

Feezah01:


I've noticed you bruv anything that concern ladies you always have something negative things to say............ not every lady is like ur ex and present and wait don't you have sisters are they like that too?

I'm a lady in a relationship and i'm supporting my guy's hustle so please don't generalize us

perhaps you are 1 out of 10 which I quite appreciate your input. The remaining 9 are just less concern how and where you get your money from. They are more interested in spending with you.

Abeg women continue dealing with them. Continue jare. As dem don fall mugu, why una no go chop?

I strongly believe that if these creatures whose brains are compared to those of fishes can pull a man down, then that man was never meant for the top. He was never meant for greatness.

Let me analyse the situation a little better. Men have d!cks, money and power. All three can be used to control women. Women have only pu**y. Them no too get money, and they hardly wield power. Abeg who is suppose to control who? Who is suppose to woo who? Who is supposed to be doing the other a favour when a contract to date/mate/marry is reached?

Abeg make I carry my small knowledge dey go. Who go fall mugu, go still fall mugu.

Igbokiller:
why stop him from saying what majority women around are like??

I never stopped him from saying his mind i just want him to be honest