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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? (41365 Views)
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Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Brightgem(f): 5:47pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
J111333:Sometimes being toxic is not the famous negative things. Sometimes being toxic is helping too much in the name of loving someone. Their are people you need to love from afar without helping, because you are not helping them. How can a couple be unable to stand on their two feet. It's ridiculous. How do you invest 10million in someone and there's nothing to show for it. Hian! Bros comman invest in me, you'll be proud. Lolz, Jokes apart, sometimes to help someone they need to be helping themselves. 5th baby on the way, maybe they shd turn to the church too for help. 3 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by maya007: 5:48pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
You better just wake up one day and form cry ooo tell her u lost ur job and everything u have or own and that ur coming back to join dem with d hustling life and see if she will ever dail ur number again 3 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by nlPoster: 5:56pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
franchasng: The op said nothing about tribe. And even if you know his tribe, could you make your point without ethnic references to others. 1 Like |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Dunni007(f): 6:15pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
please stop whatever assistance you're rendering to them for now and see if they will be responsible for their kids, you can't continue to fend for her and her family because she happens to be your favorite cousin and truth is they are only using you 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by bluntspade: 6:42pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Pretend to be poor for a while. Formulate a very good story. That's when you'll know if they care or are just using you. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by aragonchuks(m): 6:53pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
My mother helped her five brothers and two sisters to set up their life , but no one ever bought me a pen till today .. op if you want to give , give a helping hand but don’t let it get to your elbow .. let’s say life happens to you today , they will still survive 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 8:22pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Black man, black mentality. The only thing they know is sex and bringing kids into this shithole to suffer. Tomorrow another foolish nairalander will open a thread encouraging early marriage not minding if the couple are financially capable or not. 2 Likes
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Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 8:28pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
rafindo: That is black man mentality for you. I can't count the number of threads on nairaland with mantra such as: "Get married early." "Use whatever you have to start a family." "Have your kids quick so that you can see your granchildren." "Many couples married with less that 30k as salary" So many stupid stupid things. The whites were right to call us "Black Monkey" Cc: Franchasng 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by consultancy: 8:34pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
If you can comfortably help your cousin and her family without it affecting your financial state negatively, then continue to help them. It may be your own cross here on earth; we all have ours |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 8:37pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
pocohantas: Wife material... 1 Like
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Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by DESAN(f): 8:43pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
The first son can open a student account with access bank just with a passport and school ID card. The account is for student from age 16 and it allows transactions up to 500k J111333: 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Femsyn(m): 8:51pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
I hope the OP sees this. Try this OP. Give a reason why you will have to stop extending your hands of love financially, and take note of their reaction. Usually, they will drag your name in the mud, as though you've never been of help before. Let's see if they'd be any different and become independent after the episode. 3 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 8:52pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
lavenjcrown: Badt guy! 3 Likes
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Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 8:57pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Plead: See your life Ornicus. Another nairalander has noticed. I remember telling you this back then. Rather than listen, you called me a troll and came at me with your usual synonyms. No let me take up your matter again. Change! |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 8:58pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
ornicus: You will never accept the truth. So he is homoerotic because he called out your bullshit? |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Raalsalghul: 9:04pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
jaymichael: 1 Like
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Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by rafindo(m): 9:06pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
J111333: They are blackmailing you emotional 1 Like |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Blackpearlous(f): 9:17pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
J111333: Honestly this might sound cruel but you need to stop fixing things in their home, you need to withdraw gradually you are not helping the family.. Open an account for him yourself, a 16year old can, so you can take care of him this is you withdrawing gradually. You need to teach the kid to also be financially independent. For your cousin she shouldnt use your kindness like that if she is honorable, the bible doesn't support laziness. Trust me if you withdraw life will go on and they will survive. When I was in school my greatest idea came when they didn't send me money, broke and hungry I was thinking hard and deep.. humans are designed to survive, they will and become better. If they resent you they are not wise.. I learnt a lot when my family went through a major financial crisis and u saw the way my mum displayed honor and will rather be hungry with us than live off another. I hope you do it right without breaking your own heart too 4 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by frozen70(f): 9:22pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
1 Like |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Biingoo: 9:23pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
frozen70:Anu mpama!!! |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by frozen70(f): 9:26pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Biingoo: You are hear fighting yourself and my comment is busy counting likes on the same topic that is giving you sleepless night Just because you are a Biingoo doesn't mean you should be barking on my post |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Biingoo: 9:27pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
frozen70:Goan cash out the likes ewu. Likes kill you there! |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by frozen70(f): 9:28pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Biingoo: You may strangle yourself, I don't care |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Biingoo: 9:29pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
frozen70:Rubbish! Spit!! |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by EvangelistChuks(m): 9:29pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all-(Ecle.9:11) So then it is not of him that willeth, nor of him that runneth, but of God that showeth mercy-(Rom.9:16). And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not-(Gal.6:9). When you and your sister were engaging in children pranks,did that 'cousin' of yours abandon you ?Now that the shoe is in the other leg people that don't know how far you have come,want to cause enemity between you. Why do you think God gave you money? |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by frozen70(f): 9:30pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Awesome01(m): 9:32pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
My advice: Call her to a private meeting or chat. Let her know how you feel about this situation. Talk to her like a family member. Tell her your mind and promise to give her one last chance on a business she likes to do. Believe me, she'll not be happy. Don't bother. She may even become angry. Don't worry. She will come back to her senses later and thank you, for pushing her to liberation. |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Biingoo: 9:32pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
frozen70:Onye iberibe |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by frozen70(f): 9:40pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Biingoo: Ogana afugi ka ose |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by frozen70(f): 9:42pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
Biingoo: Why spitting it out now that you have gotten the taste |
Re: How Can I Stop Helping My Cousin Without Feeling Guilty About Her Kids? by Biingoo: 9:48pm On Nov 26, 2019 |
frozen70:Mechionu there! |
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