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My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by UncleSnr(m): 11:49pm On Jun 21, 2020
With the way divorce take dey sweet me, e sure say I fit last with woman?
Baba, I no just get talk for you except, prepare to get married to a new wife.

6 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Homguy(m): 12:08am On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused


dont be a weakling!!!

8 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by DesChyko: 2:12am On Jun 22, 2020
Na you get your family o. Ultimately you do what you know is best here.

If you want my advice, toughen up. She can't give you headache like this. These actions could only mean you've shown too much concern.

Give her an ultimatum. If she doesn't meet up, bros, prepare for a new life.

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Javalist: 2:51am On Jun 22, 2020
You don't want to report this case to the police yet, I believe they will only make it worst. First, report this to the elders in your family and her family. They'll surely advise you on how to resolve this issue peacefully.

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nobody: 4:03am On Jun 22, 2020
UncleSnr:
With the way divorce take dey sweet me, e sure say I fit last with woman?
Baba, I no just get talk for you except, prepare to get married to a new wife.
get married ke? When he can return to being single and live a free life? grin He's got two kids already. Na to chill and enjoy the ladies around him sure pass.

So many reason why men die earlier than women.
Any woman tries to take my peace of mind from me I'll sell the house we both in and fly abroad leaving her stranded. I'm not wicked. Just don't make life miserable for me.

I might have to end up like wizkid and Davido. Give them belle and work for the money to raise the kids.

17 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Olawale118(m): 6:14am On Jun 22, 2020
Be sure you are the father of those kids.

7 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by CONFAMA: 6:57am On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused



Guy man up. Your wife has seen you as a simp and is taking advantage of you.

5 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Smile4mee01: 7:21am On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused



If you are unmarried, please learn.
Too many red flags but you let love blind you.
1. She was a drop put
2. She was raised by a single mum, she would see nothing wrong being one.
3. You let other family members i.e her mum live with you.
4. What is the relationship with her father?

Men please don't ignore these signs.

@Op : Please relax your mind, don't give women power over you. Inform her family and police, and stick to your hustle. She will come around, especially when money is needed for kids upkeep.

You see why some men are reluctant to get married. because all these women look lovey dovey before the marriage. I now understand what Reno omikri was saying, no need waste money on top wedding.

11 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Atk1nson(m): 7:46am On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:
I really appreciate your comments, I feel a lot better emotionally now,
I even actually agreed I cheated, and I have apologized, still she left.
Being a father makes u bear a lot and carry a lot on ur mind for peace to rain, I am not weak am just being understanding.

Thanks anyways

Why will you admit to cheating if you didn't cheat?

Oga as one of the contributors said "you're weak", if you continue being weak, you'll keep having issues with your wife.

Take some time off from your relationship, grow some balls.

Stop your silly apologies, let your wife know she's free to leave, you'll never force her into any relationship and your concern is the welfare of your children, also let them know you won't be hosting any relatives going forward.

You need to be a man

Nb- I'm married myself

21 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by zedegit: 7:51am On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:
I really appreciate your comments, I feel a lot better emotionally now,
I even actually agreed I cheated, and I have apologized, still she left.
Being a father makes u bear a lot and carry a lot on ur mind for peace to rain, I am not weak am just being understanding.

Thanks anyways


You cheated? Did you fvck another woman?

I thought you said you were just talking? Can't you be straight to us for us to advise you properly.

If this inconsistency and insecurity is what she saw in you, then it's unfortunate.
I believe you were even stammering before her.

Hah!

10 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by zedegit: 7:53am On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:


Na better person u be, thanks

You think drinking alcohol will solve your problems?
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by zedegit: 7:56am On Jun 22, 2020
Ohemababy:


Sorry how do you mean a man's kids?
Are they not her kids also.
Police for what? I dont really understand.

To arrest his kids mom for what crime exactly?

For abduction. It's a criminal offence.
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Tillatalk: 9:11am On Jun 22, 2020
Marriage na scam

6 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by SideIncome(m): 11:53am On Jun 22, 2020
Look out for the elderly ones in her family and go to see anyone who is reasonable enough. you need to buy people from her side to yours by going to explain the current situation or if you cant find any in the family, look out for anyone she respect. Foundation is faulty but do well to get back your wife before correcting the entire issue at hand

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Owiii(m): 4:29pm On Jun 22, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused


What made her mother a single parent is after her life too. Pattern are real.

1 Like

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Buuks77: 6:17pm On Jun 22, 2020
Bola146:
This is serious, you need to calm down. I always say this, it's better to marry a bad wife than to get married to a bad in law sad Just need a good lawyer and also be very prayerful
what nonsense are you saying. I rather remain single than having either of the two biko

11 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Onyi22(f): 10:03pm On Jun 23, 2020
H
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nobody: 10:07pm On Jun 23, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused


... My name is Stanley(not real names)...
Your name is Stanley yet not real name ...
Do you have brain at all?

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nobody: 10:08pm On Jun 23, 2020
Na this thing called marriage I wan go enter?
Abeg marriage is overrated jhoor.

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by sammirano: 10:09pm On Jun 23, 2020
Just continue ignoring them all together. And that bull shit of sueing is crap with no basis.
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by braine(m): 10:10pm On Jun 23, 2020
Never marry any lady brought up by a single mother (except the father is late tho.) Their views about marriage is usually incomplete.

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by tydi(m): 10:10pm On Jun 23, 2020
Oga go do DNA for those children so you wouldn't be fighting a fruitless battle.. Bye.

12 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Aboguede(m): 10:12pm On Jun 23, 2020
Don't worry we go settle the matter


Go find xk run an with ompa

We will get back to you



simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused


Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nanavati(m): 10:13pm On Jun 23, 2020
let's start from here did you pay her bride price?
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Kobicove(m): 10:14pm On Jun 23, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest...

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused



This is a case of abduction and I advise you treat it as such
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nobody: 10:14pm On Jun 23, 2020
Some kind family you don't marry into.

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nobody: 10:14pm On Jun 23, 2020
Iamundisputed:
Please report to the police as a first step. I hope you and your wife settle and reunite, but it's important that you inform the police & write a statement, just in case.

Also, I don't think your wife packed out because you were only playing or flirting with a woman, she probably must have caught you cheating, don't tell lies please.

Women usually change their attitude towards sex after birth cos of: 1. Personal insecurity because the vagina may not be as tight as it was. 2. Postpartum depression. 3.other psychological issues. This is where your emotional intelligence as a man comes into play. You need to have an understanding of her mood and help her want sex again.

Find a way to win her heart back, if possible, have your people call her people.
I wish u a happy home.

I suspect OP was cheating. It is very possible.

At the same time, as some have said earlier, his wife is the product of a single mum...a woman who was probably used and dumped by a man. As a result, as a defence mechanism, the woman may have passed her suspicions of men to her daughter...so once she heard that her son-in law was flirting....she sees it as an instant replay.

Anyway, I suspect OP. There is more to this story. It is also possible the wife too is the easily suspicious type.

1 Like

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Babisha10(m): 10:15pm On Jun 23, 2020
It seems she controls the house
Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Nobody: 10:15pm On Jun 23, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused


MARRIAGE MATTER don tire person.
PEOPLE should start training their kids to maintain a single life

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by OdefaGirl(f): 10:16pm On Jun 23, 2020
Inform your own family and make sure you tell them the truth which you are hiding from us.... and if you aren't hiding any, relax.... Send your people to know the whereabout of your kids for their well-being sake.... she will understand what she did to herself when same mother of hers begin to quarrel with her too. But if you are guilty of the crime, better change your ways for peace sake

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by Babisha10(m): 10:16pm On Jun 23, 2020
DontBullshitMe:
Weak men everywhere.

You are a very weak man.
I thought as much

2 Likes

Re: My Worst Fear Finally Happened, Please Help by hotspec(m): 10:16pm On Jun 23, 2020
simplexity:
Firstly I will like to apologize for any errors made while typing, and I am seriously in need of ur advice and criticism.

My name is Stanley(not real names) married for 4years with two Lovely kids both female with d eldest at age 4. Trust me I cherish and love my family. I am a graduate while my wife dropout from the university cause of some money issues her single mother had while she was sick. After our first child I made sure she got admitted to a polytechnic and thankful she just rounded up her N.D all expenses paid by me, with high hopes of Getting admitted for her HND.

The problem started after our first child, my wife attitude towards sex changed totally, she would never let me touch her or play with her, calling her pet names will usually end in quarrel, I spoke with her her severally, pleaded and beg her most times but her attitude never changed, she made me feel like I met nothing to her, yet she will always fight with me whenever ever she suspects I have a girlfriend, fights with any female that comes close to me through calls or chats, she even went as far as beating up a lady that needed my help thinking I was dating her.

Fast forward to recently, her mom who is a single mother relocated to stay with us, and during her stay we had some misunderstanding about money issues, (note both me and wifey are gainfully employed in the ratio of 10:4, but 60% of wifey salary goes to her mom while she spends the rest 40% anyhow she likes) during d money issues a frd of hers came and told both of them that she see saw me flirting with a lady. And without hearing my own side of the coin my mother in-law rained curses on me , reported my to all her family members and left my house angrily, two days later my wife took our children and left my house while I was in d office, I called about her where about and she said she won't tell me and she said I will hear from her family soon, her mom called a family friend saying she will sue me.

It's been one week now and I don't know the whereabouts of my kids.

Should I report to the police or what?
Note I have apologized to wife for the crime I didn't commit yet it seems they want a bigger pound of flesh.

Please kindly advise me caused am depressed and confused


Bros, urs is even better. we have similar issues. d mistake u made was allowing ur mother in-law to live in. my in-law rained curses on me, and my wife even arrested me with police because she wanted to go with our two daughters. mybin laws live in d same town with us. it's always from one problem to another. d same allegation mybwife gave me and mother in law called to rain curses on me without even asking me. in fact she even came to my workplace to fight. May God see u tru. I'm as confused as ure. just eat and try to sleep, then try to be around people that can play with u and lift ur spirit.

5 Likes

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