There's this girl i'm dating & I love her very much, but I discovered something about her past that she refused to tell me intentionally. The last guy she dated before me live in the same street with I & her. I know this may not be augur well, but since she said they had no sex in the course of their relationship, I thought I could cope with it, because everybody has one or two ugly past. Just few days ago, I discovered that her claim was FALSE, that they had sex even more than three times when they dated. I asked her & she confessed it to be TRUE. That she was ashamed to tell me the truth back then. This made me lose the trust I had in her, because i've been thinking, "what more secrets will I have to discover?" I want to quit the relationship, but some friends told me to forgive her. So, I need all your sincere & mature advice on this. What should I do? Thanks in anticipation for your replies.

Another thread on deceit today. what will save us from these girls. . .??

@Poster, just follow your heart. Thank God its a relationship, not marriage

Buthupogon: ...I thought I could cope with it, because everybody has one or two ugly past. Just few days ago, I discovered that her claim was FALSE, that they had sex even more than three times WHEN THEY DATED.

What do you mean by 'everybody has got one or two ugly past?? WELL I DON'T.

They had sex when they dated. That was in the past bro. Though lying about it was uncalled for. She obviously feared losing ya. Just talk to her and ask if there is any other thing you should know.

If/since you are sure it is really over between her and the guy, just put their sex escapade behind you and think of building the relationship.

Acidosis: Another thread on deceit today. what will save us from these girls. . .??

What girls, oh, the men are the saints ba? Puleease!

nikkyshyne:
What girls, oh, the men are the saints ba? Puleease!

somehow men don't commit such crimes

Firstly OP I'd like to know what you consider her offense here.

-Is it that she dated a guy in the same street?
-That she slept with him?
-or that she lied about it.

sweetcocoa: Firstly OP I'd like to know what you consider her offense here.

-Is it that she dated a guy in the same street?
-That she slept with him?
-or that she lied about it.

Hi Sweetcocoa. Nice questions. Poster over to you

I want to quit the relationship, but some friends told me to forgive her. So, I need all your sincere & mature advice on this. What should I do?

If Nairaland didnt exist what would you have done?What if you didn't have friends? Listen and obey your conscience.Advice comes in all forms but ONLY YOU knows what is best and good for your life.

A relationship without trust is no relationship.

Forgiveness is something you do for yourself, so don't think you would be doing her a favour if you forgive her. You forgive so you can move on. What you need to figure out is whether you want to move on with or without her.

Forgive her.

@all, thanks for ur response. @nikkyshyne, forgive me 4 dt fallacy I committed. The right word should have been, "MOST" & "NOT" all. Thanks. @Sweetcocoa, her offense is that she lied. Thanks

"MOST" & not "ALL" please.

Oh well then if her offense is that she lied then i advice you forgive her and keep an eye on her,pay mind to things she tells you.

I, like many other people believe that there shouldn't be a reason to lie,especially to people who love and trust us but over the years i've come to learn that, sometimes people lie to protect the person they lie to and his\her feelings,again some people are scared of what the outcome of the truth might be (say like their partner leaving)so they lie.

I'm not saying its okay to lie,I'm just saying people deserve 2nd chances,so give her one and time to prove that she's worth trusting again.

Forgive her then quit