This is about a friend of mine that needs help.
There is this gal in his place of work that likes him, and she is hell bent on dating this guy, she is obsessed with him, calls him incessantly, visits him everytime at work, stalks him and now tells everybody that cares to listen that they are dating. He is in a serious relationship and he is embarassed by the gal. He has told her off many times and on one occassion she reported him to his superior at work.
Contributions,

About 4 years ago, I had a lady giving me that kind of treatment. What I did are as follow:

1. I ignored her and went on blind dates. I show off female pals to her as my lovers. My pals undersand.

In your friend case, let him openly show love and affection to his babe right in the presense of the impostor. Is she has any dignity, she would read the sign.

2. In my case, the lady later saw through my deceiption. She intensified her efforts thinking I was shy. I invited her to talk, first in private, and told her I wasn't interested in what she wanted. I lectured her like my sister. She didn't leave me alone. Then I brought a withness to be there. Again she went ahead and met my mum. She introduced herself as my fiance! I was livid with rage when I heard this. Since I don't live with my mum, I gave her my last warning. Unfortunately for her and her advisers, I came to visit my mum unexpectedly. And I went for the last option.

3. Kick her out of your life! I have never been harsh to a lady before but I had to do it! I sent her out of the house even against my mum wish in front of our guests. It was enough humiliation for her to stop coming.

I don't get angry easily but I don't like stubborn intruder.

@poster,
why not try the steps? Don't use the last step until the situation become hopeless.

Don't beat her no matter what. It would make you look like a coward.

About 4 years ago, I had a lady giving me that kind of treatment. What I did are as follow:

1. I ignored her and went on blind dates. I show off female pals to her as my lovers. My pals undersand.

In your friend case, let him openly show love and affection to his babe right in the presense of the impostor. Is she has any dignity, she would read the sign.

2. In my case, the lady later saw through my deceiption. She intensified her efforts thinking I was shy. I invited her to talk, first in private, and told her I wasn't interested in what she wanted. I lectured her like my sister. She didn't leave me alone. Then I brought a withness to be there. Again she went ahead and met my mum. She introduced herself as my fiance! I was livid with rage when I heard this. Since I don't live with my mum, I gave her my last warning. Unfortunately for her and her advisers, I came to visit my mum unexpectedly. And I went for the last option.

3. Kick her out of your life! I have never been harsh to a lady before but I had to do it! I sent her out of the house even against my mum wish in front of our guests. It was enough humiliation for her to stop coming.

I don't get angry easily but I don't like stubborn intruder.

@poster,
why not try the steps? Don't use the last step until the situation become hopeless.

Don't beat her no matter what. It would make you look like a coward.

My friends, girlfriend is not in the same town with him. We actually went to church together ( Me posing as d galfriend) if looks could kill he would have died, she gave dis terrible look, igorned him for somedays then went ahead to report him to his superior. Now she back with full force.
I'll tell him about the other steps.
Thanks.

Let him arrange for his girlfriend to visit at least once. It would be a great moment.

So the babe get Eagle eyes? Unless she is a witch. I see nothing extra ordinary in a lady stirring at her rival. It is very normal. That is trait of insecured ladies. In fact, she is dangerous. A potential candidate for jealousy. If your friend is man enough, he would stop her. Ignoring her would make her silently die of frustration.

Just warn your friend not to eat her food or drink. He must sit on his chair without cleaning it. Just in case . She may end up us using love concoction on him.

I think he should see the HR asap or else she'll keep reporting him for no apparent reason
at least that way they know there's something going on


he should introduce her to his friend

Just warn your friend not to eat her food or drink. He must sit on his chair without cleaning it. Just in case . She may end up us using love concoction on him.

love concoction?? lmao yea right!!!

olanajim:


3. Kick her out of your life! I have never been harsh to a lady before but I had to do it! I sent her out of the house even against my mum wish in front of our guests. It was enough humiliation for her to stop coming.

I don't get angry easily but I don't like stubborn intruder.

. . . . . .  the eva calm one. . . . .  i would have loved to see that. 

I would not date person who is obssessed lover in the name of stalking, jealousy and possessive spirit! DANGEROUS like the movie "FATAL ATTRACTION".

If i was his shoe, go ahead marry to the one I committed serious relationship and bring a marriage certificate to your boss in order to file for sexual harrassment against sickly obssessed coworker/lover.

That is only way to solve the problem. But sadly you are in Nigeria, lawless, no sexual harrassment rights went effective!!!

It works in the USA under sexual harrassment law to fire employee who is obsessed lover stalking other employee.

Taking care of such people shouldnt be that difficult. I don't know about such policies at workplaces in Nigeria, but here in Canada, it is simply called Sexual Harrassment, And there is a policy against such.

Workplace romance shldnt be encouraged in the first place and when the other individual doesn't seem to give a breathing place, next is to report such as sexual harassment and HR will obviously take effect and deal with such person,

I'd say reporting the situation to the HR shld be the next step, they will probably know how well to deal with it.

He just has to be real careful cause girls like these can get dangerous especially when they feel they have a rival.
They are in their own world and no amount of words can change that.

So he better just totally ignore her calls, texts or even greetings.

Gentleaura,
Laws are meant for the idiots. Fortunately a bill to that effect is in National Assembly, dancing orobokibo on the hallow chamber. Let hope it is passed . I hope that someday such people would be checked.

Naja Haje,
well, being gentle mustn't be conceived as weakness. The lady nearly brought me into a scandal. Thank God, I didn't have gf that would have complicated it. I am also shy. But, that shyness had to be dumped in the dustbin when my integrity is at stake. I didn't add that I was a Man o' war member. So it definitely mean I could as well turn her to training pitch. But I didn't lift a hand. I don't think violence against women or anybody is justified under any circustance. There are better options.

Adeboo,
exactly. That would would make the lady look like a slowpoke. Still, the guy should watch out for Love portion and seductive acts from the lady and take precautions. That is the only thing that can weaken his resolve to keep her off.

@poster,
ur pal should learn 2 be firm & put his foot down even if it means being mean & harsh. Its obvious that this obsessed luva is taking his kindness 4 weakness & is encouraged that his resolve will soon crumble. So i suggest that ur man takes up a very, very tough stance!
If i may ask, what is it about this "obsessed luva" that he doesn't like?

RuuDie:

@poster,
your pal should learn 2 be firm & put his foot down even if it means being mean & harsh. Its obvious that this obsessed luva is taking his kindness 4 weakness & is encouraged that his resolve will soon crumble. So i suggest that your man takes up a very, very tough stance!
If i may ask, what is it about this "obsessed luva" that he doesn't like?

Maybe the fact that she is a bit kolo - has some mental issues.

never knew things like this still exist
Ob gini? when there are lots of guy outside there.
@poster,i dont envy your friend at all ooo i can only imagine what hes going tru,Olajinams post should help.

@Olanagim

you don't need to justify your actions to me babe. We all have moments when we don't have to play fair or be stupid, if I may say.  I just thought it would have been interesting watching you. 

Hi, thanks for ur contributions
@ RuuDie he already has a girlfriend
He told the girl he has a fiance and he is marrying soon, the girl didn't hear .
On sunday(yesterday) she apologised for disturbing him and when to join the drama group of their church after discovering he is in dat group.

I kinda confussed . . . . @Topics  . . . . .Your naratives are kinda disjointed . . . . .One minutes its your friend . . . . .the next munite its you . ,

Maybe its just me . . . .but well . . . .good luck with your admirerer .

Nautillus am not getting U, how did I indicate it's about me?

@poster
thank God she is changing. But your friend must not relax! Look, she may be using what Robert Greene called " The surrender tactic." she back out of the dangerous game when she know she would lose. So as to restrategise for a better and more effective plan. "Let's be just friends", she would say. Then friends sees daily, meets daily. You know they work in same environment. Soon, both would relax and your friend would not know when the friendship transmogrify into love. It is a possibility if he let her come closer in this circumstance.

I am a fan of Machieavelli, and I can tell you that your friend is in trouble if he "be just friend" with a lady that had gone that far with him in the past. Tell him to avoid her altogether! As Robert Greene said "crush your enemy completely" if it is possible that he can become more vicious than ever after he recovers.

If he/she can't resign from that office then he must dine with her with a long spoon until the spirit of desperation is completely cured. That is until she get another bobo to tango with.

Naja Haja,
well, It would be nice to watch me bark like I did. I am sure you would have fun. Fortunately, it won't happen again! Maybe, possibly if I act a film.

This story from poster is very one-sided.
I wonder why nobody has figured it out.
A girl cannot just start stalking a guy from office to church just b/c she has a crush on him.
Let the poster get the full gist from her friend b/c a lot of water must have passed under the bridge b/f the stalking began.
Or are you telling me that girls have turned predators lately?

opokonwa:

This story from poster is very one-sided.
I wonder why nobody has figured it out.
A girl cannot just start stalking a guy from office to church just b/c she has a crush on him.
Let the poster get the full gist from her friend b/c a lot of water must have passed under the bridge b/f the stalking began.
Or are you telling me that girls have turned predators lately?

Yes Bro, some girls have turned Predators. Its the end time my dear. A friend of mine use to be really shy, there was this chick who was destined to have him, she went through his Bosses, Through some of His Family Members ( Only that his mom did not tolerate that kind of thing), She would call at odd hours and be crying, Because I was close to him, she assumed I was his chick, she would call me and harras me, she came to my office once and embarrased the hell out of me. It was so bad, that he had to report her to the police to stop the harrasment, at the Police Station she claimed he hadgotten her pregnant and wanted to abandon her, When they said they should go for a test, she started crying, Shouting and screaming it was a sick sight to see, she was screamin " Is it a crime to be in love". In this my Short life, I have seen Plenty Things oh

Haaaagh! That is interesting! I thought it only happem in the South!

Well, the girls are having their ways. I can count up to 3 instances where they got their wishes. That is to get pregnant for the guy if he turn out to be a real family man. Most responsible guys would accept the baby and the wife. That account for why guys marry ladies they don't love and why a good guys suddenly marry a bad lady just because she got pregnant for him. My friend fell victim to this kind of trick. But he had learn to take the lady. While the lady he love is still mourning her loss.

Girls are becoming predators now!

Hmm!! nawa oh!! For this age, wonders shall never end.

keep ignoring him, he'll get tired one day!

Very risky

olanajim:
Haaaagh! That is interesting! I thought it only happem in the South!

Well, the girls are having their ways. I can count up to 3 instances where they got their wishes. That is to get pregnant for the guy if he turn out to be a real family man. Most responsible guys would accept the baby and the wife. That account for why guys marry ladies they don't love and why a good guys suddenly marry a bad lady just because she got pregnant for him. My friend fell victim to this kind of trick. But he had learn to take the lady. While the lady he love is still mourning her loss.

Girls are becoming predators now!

husband scarce well well.thats why they wont let an opportunity pass by...

Una never c anything, end time things bro,them penty for town well well this day's. Imagine a secondary school girl on my street approach me,bluntly she toasted me...was kinda eh,is this girl joking?anyway i said i have heard,the next time she saw me she started following me with race.....no be small tin ooo...afterwards again when we saw she shouted and abuse me that i was not caring,i just shook my head and walked away from the desperado girl.wonders i will say...

opokonwa:
This story from poster is very one-sided.
I wonder why nobody has figured it out.
A girl cannot just start stalking a guy from office to church just b/c she has a crush on him.
Let the poster get the full gist from her friend b/c a lot of water must have passed under the bridge b/f the stalking began.
Or are you telling me that girls have turned predators lately?