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Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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She Said This To Me; Should She Be Taken Serious? / Dating Is Just For Fun And Shouldn't Be Taken Serious. / Revealed: Why Lagos Women End Up Being Single Mothers (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by AyaSammy(f): 10:23am On Nov 29, 2012
ujukala: Girls are supposed to be married before having an issue. But, how do we classify those who were raped or jilted at the eleventh hour before they have an issue? Men with good reasoning will think twice. Try to know first the circumstance behind the girl having a child.

Thank u jare, but their insecurity and selfishness wont give room for good reasoning.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by AyaSammy(f): 10:25am On Nov 29, 2012
pleep: because they are 'spoilt goods'

Spoilt goods by some contaminated and infectious being (guys)

1 Like

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by AyaSammy(f): 10:27am On Nov 29, 2012
RudySmith:

It is a social problem, and also got a lot 2 do with men and their misplaced ego. U c, men want 2 b the only one between their wifey's legs, so being with a single mother confirms 2 the whole world that they r not. Many look down on being with such woman bcuz they don't want 2 support another man's child.

Even some bastard preachers will look down on single mothers, so why wouldn't confused followers/sheep do the same thing? We all know how church/religion is the driving force 4 many out there.

You have really spoken well, which is fact.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by maygah(f): 10:28am On Nov 29, 2012
Mynd_44:
Why should it be so? I hate double standards in anything the same laws that applies to a man should apply to a woman
but unfortuniately in this part of the world , we are in a man's world. Sooo many fins a man wud do & get away with , but a woman wud dare nt do 1% of it , without ish.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by nikky5(m): 10:28am On Nov 29, 2012
Recently I had a study on single mothers.Most of them are reckless and hostile.Only a few them are cultured with good mannerism.

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by kumbalo(m): 10:34am On Nov 29, 2012
fittty: Who wants another mans child to be his first child? undecided

this is just the mentalty of an avereage nigerian
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by AyaSammy(f): 10:34am On Nov 29, 2012
nikky5: Recently I had a study on single mothers.Most of them are reckless and hostile.Only a few them are cultured with good mannerism.

Oga where u do ur study, i hope it's not ur project cos u would have faild whofully, (Project turn Sore).

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Mynd44: 10:34am On Nov 29, 2012
fittty: Who wants another mans child to be his first child? undecided
Slap yourself

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by nxanadu: 10:42am On Nov 29, 2012
no comment
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by free2ryhme: 10:46am On Nov 29, 2012
most nigerian culture are reserved to marrying single mothers most esp when you are a single man
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 10:48am On Nov 29, 2012
pleep: Are you serious, what planet are you from? Ladies don't want to marry dudes with kids
I wouldn't mind. Women are mature enough to understand that his child can never stop her from loving and sharing a happy life with him ans it wld be good for tht child to grow up in a home where the parental figures are living together too. We stil have mature pple who think and reason beyond ur level
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by 360command: 10:53am On Nov 29, 2012
The day they became single mothers is the day a man wil not take them serious.if there is a seriousness, its just 5% especially when its a single guy.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 11:01am On Nov 29, 2012
360command: The day they became single mothers is the day a man wil not take them serious.if there is a seriousness, its just 5% especially when its a single guy.
my sister who became single mother after her husband died got married to a single guy...good looking and hardworking. U are talking absolute nonsense

3 Likes

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by kpolli(m): 11:30am On Nov 29, 2012
Cos they were not taken serious by their baby-daddies

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Tenderly1(f): 11:44am On Nov 29, 2012
pleep: Are you serious, what planet are you from? Ladies don't want to marry dudes with kids
point of correction,i've seen ladies who marry a guy with kid or kids as the case may be.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by kingingkinging: 11:45am On Nov 29, 2012
I respect the guys that marry them any time I see such. Not because of anything other the fact that I know I always find it difficult to do. My main reason is, why should I marry a woman whose second husband is somewhere? Remember any day or time the child wants to do wedding or graduation, it is the other man that will sit with my wife, put on same cloth and act like husband and wife. Why should I be second husband? They will even snap, dance together, if it is in the South west, they will even ask her to kneel down and do all sort of things......ahahahahahahah. I cant stand such. shocked

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 11:49am On Nov 29, 2012
kingingkinging: I respect the guys that marry them any time I see such. Not because of anything other the fact that I know I always find it difficult to do. My main reason is, why should I marry a woman whose second husband is somewhere? Remember any day or time the child wants to do wedding or graduation, it is the other man that will sit with my wife, put on same cloth and act like husband and wife. Why should I be second husband? They will even snap, dance together, if it is in the South west, they will even ask her to kneel down and do all sort of things......ahahahahahahah. I cant stand such. shocked
so u wld rather sacrifice a whole life time of happiness wit a woman u love simply because u wld not be okay with what will happen on her child's wedding day (one day) wow...ur reasoning amazes me
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Tenderly1(f): 11:50am On Nov 29, 2012
kumbalo:
this is just the mentalty of an avereage nigerian
Gbam
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by megxo(m): 11:51am On Nov 29, 2012
kpolli: Cos they were not taken serious by their baby-daddies
DOZ KIND OF PPO FALL 4 D WRONG KINDA GUYS,,,,,FROM THIEVES TO ABGERO, FROM SMOKERS TO SCUMBAGS
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 11:59am On Nov 29, 2012
In 9ja no way!!!!! Except of course i know her too well and the circumstances surroundin the birth of the child, and if i cant live without her

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Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Tenderly1(f): 12:02pm On Nov 29, 2012
megxo: DOZ KIND OF PPO FALL 4 D WRONG KINDA GUYS,,,,,FROM THIEVES TO ABGERO, FROM SMOKERS TO SCUMBAGS
and many fall for bankers,doctors etc and they refuse to accept responsible because of one flimzy excuse.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 12:20pm On Nov 29, 2012
.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by samir101ng(m): 12:23pm On Nov 29, 2012
As a single, young unmarried male i honestly cannot marry a woman that has a child already with another man. I have nothing against such women neither do i speak ill of them. Every person has his own cross (sins) to carry so who am i to judge. There are a 1001 reasons behind a woman being a single mother. From being raped, unprotected sex and promiscuity, divorce, death of spouse etc. Therefore, one shouldn't be in such a rush to judge those women. Having a child is a game changer for any single man in a relationship. Let's not kid ourselves. Some mothers try to hide it and eventually it comes out when both have invested so much time and energy into the relationship. But like i said, a child is a human being with feelings and emotions. Therefore, don't blame any guy who wants out when he finds out about it. Be upfront and honest about it to any interested guy before the relationship get's too far. I have met a few single mother's who caught my eye but i politely told them how i felt and ended it quickly before it got too far. Some might claim happiness & love, but as experience has shown its better to make a clean beginning. We fall in & out of love everyday so its no guarantee of a long viable marriage. Now, am seeing plenty ladies here advocating for single guys to accept such women but i believe every person has a choice. And you should respect that choice. Not all fingers are equal as are all men but that doesn't lessen their value or importance.

9 Likes

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by RudySmith(m): 12:29pm On Nov 29, 2012
kingingkinging: I respect the guys that marry them any time I see such. Not because of anything other the fact that I know I always find it difficult to do. My main reason is, why should I marry a woman whose second husband is somewhere? Remember any day or time the child wants to do wedding or graduation, it is the other man that will sit with my wife, put on same cloth and act like husband and wife. Why should I be second husband? They will even snap, dance together, if it is in the South west, they will even ask her to kneel down and do all sort of things......ahahahahahahah. I cant stand such. shocked

What u wrote above is very very childish. Instead of being happy 4 the child that u would surely call ur own by then, u r here focussing on your own egotistic issues. What's the big deal if ur wife and the child's father r the main focus during that one day? Hopefully u will have ur own children with this woman and can celebrate their marriage 2.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 12:40pm On Nov 29, 2012
Goes against the Leykis code
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 12:44pm On Nov 29, 2012
Not just in naija as some people are claiming here. even in the US the worst thing that can happen to a woman is to be branded a 'baby mama' they get little respect there too.

2 Likes

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Nobody: 12:47pm On Nov 29, 2012
It depends on the individual anyway, i know many single guys who married single moms(both in naija and away). Timbo married his wife as a single mom who had 3 kids- thats just one, there are many others.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by cold(m): 1:02pm On Nov 29, 2012
AyaSammy:

And who says that your socalld first child is truly ur first, after how many abortions, hissssssss
Just so you know,an aborted foetus is not a child by any stretch of the imagination. Only pro lifers make it so.
That being said,i have absolutely no qualms dating single moms & have done so in the not so distant past & is still doing so. It's just society,that frowns at such. But so long as you're both happy that's all that matters. Methinks

1 Like

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by donlyone(m): 1:16pm On Nov 29, 2012
pleep: What is unfair about it. A single man with no kids has the right to start his own family without raising another mans kids. When you were young and childless were u ladies dating dudes with kids? Why should he have to pay for your mistakes.

You read my mind. Its choice, the girl had hers, why complain ?

2 Likes

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by SAGirl: 1:21pm On Nov 29, 2012
What a topic.

I am a single mother, and I really haven't experienced that sort of discrimination. Maybe its because i live in South Africa, not Nigeria.

I have not experienced that discrimination because my role as a mother is a part of me, there is no way you can know me and not know that I am a mother. So i guess the guys with such issues stay away from me from word Go so i never even get to know what they are thinking.

What I have experienced though, is that the discrimination comes more from other women than men. Mothers, sisters and aunties will not allow their sons to marry a woman with a child, if so it comes with great difficulty. That, I have experienced as I lost a man i loved very dearly that way. And i have heard other women, even my close friends, admit that they would not want their baby brothers to marry a woman with a child.

So ladies, lets stop blaming men for once. We are as much to blame for this culture of thinking a single mother is somewhat of lower worth.

9 Likes

Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by tissot84: 1:39pm On Nov 29, 2012
SAGirl: What a topic.

I am a single mother, and I really haven't experienced that sort of discrimination. Maybe its because i live in South Africa, not Nigeria.

I have not experienced that discrimination because my role as a mother is a part of me, there is no way you can know me and not know that I am a mother. So i guess the guys with such issues stay away from me from word Go so i never even get to know what they are thinking.

What I have experienced though, is that the discrimination comes more from other women than men. Mothers, sisters and aunties will not allow their sons to marry a woman with a child, if so it comes with great difficulty. That, I have experienced as I lost a man i loved very dearly that way. And i have heard other women, even my close friends, admit that they would not want their baby brothers to marry a woman with a child.

So ladies, lets stop blaming men for once. We are as much to blame for this culture of thinking a single mother is somewhat of lower worth.

GBAM !!!
Especially if you were once married.
Re: Single Mothers Are Never Taken Serious by Sagamite(m): 1:39pm On Nov 29, 2012
AyaSammy:
And who says that your socalld first child is truly ur first, after how many abortions, hissssssss

AyaSammy:
Look at you, do know that for with every single mother there is also a single father, probably cos ur ladies were lucky geting rid of ur shit.

AyaSammy:
Thank u jare, but their insecurity and selfishness wont give room for good reasoning.

AyaSammy:
Spoilt goods by some contaminated and infectious being (guys)


Trust me, it is your stinking attitude that is putting men off you, far more than your single-motherhood.

Some men can try and overlook single-motherhood, but single-motherhood with this miasmic attitude is a no-go area.

I would not touch you with a barge-pole.

2sexy:
Guys, abeg make I go my bros "single mother or wife" house go chop pandy. We go continue the gist when I return.

The earlier some girls set their priorities right, the better for them. Which naija man wants headache for a wife?

3 Likes

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