And the drama continues...

Spitting vs Witch hunting...

Anyway sha, @Jide, I don open up that thread as promised.

So for anyone interested, Efe's doing her very own Mother Christmas thing the Waffi way. I dey dash out Recharge card pin numbers at this thread in a couple of hours....so spread the good news around and tell your friends.

https://www.nairaland.com/1145865/literature-writing-section-best-poster

davidylan:

You're quite a pathetic character if you dont realize the gravity of the words you uttered.

Paint me the way you want David , doesn't tear a flesh off my nose... don't have control over you and I wish I do tho

baby_mama: [size=18pt]Tarababy sweetie please answer me

Has this man ever kicked,hit,punched,slapped,beat or thrown an object at you?[/size]
Even if he later apologized
If yes

How many times since your marriage

see question...you be wwe referee?

jidegirl12:

Awwww..... Kpele....I don't live in the US of A , my family and friends does and not in New Jersey but ain't telling ....sorry to burst your bubble thanks for sharing tho

lol you remind me of a family i once knew when i was a kid who would regale us with wild stories of their lives in chicago. Until i grew up and traveled to chicago a few years ago and happened to stumble on their area... living in Ikoyi would have been a far far better existence than living in such squalor even in the US of A.

I dont live in any of the areas mentioned... just wanted to point out that merely living abroad does not make you any better than the fellow who lives in Surulere. Apparently your snobbery does not stop at mere skin color, you seem to have an apathy to those who have not been "lucky" enough to snag a plane ride out to whatever white country you may reside in.

Give it up dear, there is nothing special about you or your husband for that matter. The time spent babbling incoherently on this thread, you both would have had a nice trip down to broadway to catch a play and had some quality time together. But who am i to speak to the "lovey dovey marriages" you all talk about all day with everyone but your "decent" spouses who happen to hate their own skin color.

May you not be a subject of a thread here later on. pls say amen!

baby_mama:

It is an unfortunate mindset to have
I won't even move into a neighborhood with no black people
My neighbor across the street is an anesthesiologist,my next door neighbor is a retired police chief ,3 houses up is my neighbor who just ran and won the seat for district judge
They are all whites
But down my same street are two Nigerian couples
I don't know the type of black people you have near you for you to utter such a thing

Well good for you!

Have you thought maybe we live where there are few dispersed Africans where we reside and we have no choice cos of our work? All my hubby's colleagues are caucasian and mine say 2 out of ten African.

Do you know what evolution blah blah is in Biology? You adapt to your environment . Ofcourse I see people in grocery stores and wave ..... I tried to mix up as much as I could .... same goes to kids friends and schools too.

So what's with the hypertension over somebody else's life?

jidegirl12:

Paint me the way you want David , doesn't tear a flesh off my nose... don't have control over you and I wish I do tho

why? I am fine as i am thanks.

baby_mama:


It is just a matter of time and his fists land on her again

Of course, how else will he take out his aggression on her if he stops spitting?

Anyway OP, you have heard it here from your well wishers, at least he is no longer beating you ba for now. Continue to endure the spitting eh. It is better than beating. Keep mute and be submissive, work like a dog in the home while he chills. We know you must not be a saint and you are very guilty and not gentle. Suffer and smile. At least your children will grow in hatred with their father in the home. More grease to your elbow. God speed in your race to old age as a tired out, played, roughed up, bitter but happily married hag.

^^ Na wa o!

ileobatojo:

Of course, how else will he take out his aggression on her if he stops spitting?

Anyway OP, you have heard it here from your well wishers, at least he is no longer beating you ba for now. Continue to endure the spitting eh. It is better than beating. Keep mute and be submissive, work like a dog in the home while he chills. We know you must not be a saint and you are very guilty and not gentle. Suffer and smile. At least your children will grow in hatred with their father in the home. More grease to your elbow. God speed in your race to old age as a tired out, played, roughed up, bitter but happily married hag.

At least she is married. Happiness is not necessary here.

davidylan:
Oh please. This is a well-worn lie. Some women would be far happier alone than being with men who treat them no better than the scum on the soles of their shoes.

there's no woman(baby mother) that is happy alone. quit such talks. of course, they would want you to believe all is well and dandy but it's far from the truth. for the sake of the children in the centre of this ish, divorce should be the last option after all methods have failed.

davidylan:
You're quite a pathetic character if you dont realize the gravity of the words you uttered.

what's the gravity of what she uttered? haba. jidegirl's husband has the right to choose who he likes associating with. maybe he's had several ugly experiences with black people and he's decided to dissociate himself completely from them. abeg, there are enough nigerians i know in the uk who don't associate with blacks and who don't live in black neighbourhoods. their life, their choice.

Efemena_xy: ^^ Na wa o!

Efe, it's true now. Wasn't I nice by painting her life picture up to old age? I could easily have painted it up till the point she gets stabbed 15 times in a few years time like in baby mama's story.

davidylan:

At least she is married. Happiness is not necessary here.

Apparently!

[size=18pt]See as people dey yab we prison warders and correction officers?

At least na honest living we dey make.

O ga oo. God dey sha[/size]

^^ Lmao!

davidylan:

lol you remind me of a family i once knew when i was a kid who would regale us with wild stories of their lives in chicago. Until i grew up and traveled to chicago a few years ago and happened to stumble on their area... living in Ikoyi would have been a far far better existence than living in such squalor even in the US of A.

I dont live in any of the areas mentioned... just wanted to point out that merely living abroad does not make you any better than the fellow who lives in Surulere. Apparently your snobbery does not stop at mere skin color, you seem to have an apathy to those who have not been "lucky" enough to snag a plane ride out to whatever white country you may reside in.

Give it up dear, there is nothing special about you or your husband for that matter. The time spent babbling incoherently on this thread, you both would have had a nice trip down to broadway to catch a play and had some quality time together. But who am i to speak to the "lovey dovey marriages" you all talk about all day with everyone but your "decent" spouses who happen to hate their own skin color.

May you not be a subject of a thread here later on. pls say amen!

Sure you're right who are you to speak of my life even? Not your business I say.

I don't need lecture from you ..... Efe 's doing a good job in literature section.....everybody's special in their own way..... It's been established now I don't like your values and you don't either so lets leave it at that.......

Stop stressing your tiny brain bout me and my hubby .... we are doing just fine..... not chewing more than we can swallow and couldn't have asked for more happy married life

Sh it happens but we'll work it out just like my parents taught me.

coogar:

there's no woman(baby mother) that is happy alone. quit such talks. of course, they would want you to believe all is well and dandy but it's far from the truth. for the sake of the children in the centre of this ish, divorce should be the last option after all methods have failed.

No one (male or female) is 100% happy alone. But when you are faced with either being single or a life of constant headache, being ridiculed and treated as scum in your own home... i know which i would vote for. Its not like you cant marry again after a failed marriage. Lets stop pushing this false lie that being married is the be all and end all. Marry the right person and you are set for life, marry the wrong person and even hell would be a better option.

jidegirl12:

Sure you're right who are you to speak of my life even? Not your business I say.

I don't need lecture from you ..... Efe 's doing a good job in literature section.....everybody's special in their own way..... It's been established now I don't like your values and you don't either so lets leave it at that.......

Stop stressing your tiny brain bout me and my hubby .... we are doing just fine..... not chewing more than we can swallow and couldn't have asked for more happy married life

Sh it happens but we'll work it out just like my parents taught me.

Frankly nobody cares and nobody asked. You're the one spewing about your family here. I just wondered, if he was that great then why have you been here the last 3-4 hrs straight?

Secondly... if by my values you mean believing that a woman should have the dignity of being treated with love and respect in her home then sure we both dont share that value. Enjoy the poo in your marriage. i am allergic to poo.

dayokanu: [size=18pt]See as people dey yab we prison warders and correction officers?

At least na honest living we dey make.

O ga oo. God dey sha[/size]

do you hang with blacks?

davidylan:
No one (male or female) is 100% happy alone. But when you are faced with either being single or a life of constant headache, being ridiculed and treated as scum in your own home... i know which i would vote for.

this argument is based on the fact that her case is hopeless. are you certain her husband is resistant to change? why are you in a hurry to conclude nothing can be done to rehabilitate the husband? na wa o. people strive to make their marriage work - not run at the first sign of trouble.

Its not like you cant marry again after a failed marriage. Lets stop pushing this false lie that being married is the be all and end all. Marry the right person and you are set for life, marry the wrong person and even hell would be a better option.

marry who?
would you marry a mother of 2? why do we peddle options we would not take ourselves? how many single men would marry a mother of 2 or you want her to leave her husband and start cotching up with a widower, polygamist or another baby father? there's no right/wrong person to marry - if both parties work very hard to make their marriage good, it would be good!

davidylan:

Frankly nobody cares and nobody asked. You're the one spewing about your family here. I just wondered, if he was that great then why have you been here the last 3-4 hrs straight?

Secondly... if by my values you mean believing that a woman should have the dignity of being treated with love and respect in her home then sure we both dont share that value. Enjoy the poo in your marriage. i am allergic to poo.

Are you aware of the word 'WORK'? Yep ! that's what he's doing odę.

Your second paragraph crack me up yeah right David how old are you again? so I know I've not been wasting my time!

davidylan:

do you hang with blacks?

I dont have a choice Everyone in My area Ajegunle Texas is Black

coogar:

this argument is based on the fact that her case is hopeless. are you certain her husband is resistant to change? why are you in a hurry to conclude nothing can be done to rehabilitate the husband? na wa o. people strive to make their marriage work - not run at the first sign of trouble.



marry who?
would you marry a mother of 2? why do we peddle options we would not take ourselves? how many single men would marry a mother of 2 or you want her to leave her husband and start cotching up with a widower, polygamist or another baby father? there's no right/wrong person to marry - if both parties work very hard to make their marriage good, it would be good!

Don't mind them jare! Bunch of fat a ss hypocrites !!

coogar:

this argument is based on the fact that her case is hopeless. are you certain her husband is resistant to change? why are you in a hurry to conclude nothing can be done to rehabilitate the husband? na wa o. people strive to make their marriage work - not run at the first sign of trouble.

Her husband is not resistant to change i agree. But i also do not buy this idea that somehow places the burden of keeping the marriage solely on the wife. If the wife were the one beating the husband, would you be advising him to just stay strong, work on his marriage and give her room to change? Lets try to see things from the other person's perspective... would you be pleased that your brother-in-law turned your sister to a punching bag and your advice would be for her to just try to change him?

By all means she should try to save her marriage but we should not wait until she is a corpse before we advocate that sometimes your life might be more important than keeping a sham marriage alive.

coogar:
marry who?
would you marry a mother of 2? why do we peddle options we would not take ourselves? how many single men would marry a mother of 2 or you want her to leave her husband and start cotching up with a widower, polygamist or another baby father? there's no right/wrong person to marry - if both parties work very hard to make their marriage good, it would be good!

I disagree. You can be married to the wrong person... someone who is just not compatible with you in terms of outlook on life. For example, i am very laid back and would have a hard time being with a high strung, sharp mouthed woman... just not going to be a good match.

dayokanu:

I dont have a choice Everyone in My area Ajegunle Texas is Black

your area appears to be mostly white. the few blacks i ran into where at the airport.

coogar:

this argument is based on the fact that her case is hopeless. are you certain her husband is resistant to change? why are you in a hurry to conclude nothing can be done to rehabilitate the husband? na wa o. people strive to make their marriage work - not run at the first sign of trouble.



marry who?
would you marry a mother of 2? why do we peddle options we would not take ourselves? how many single men would marry a mother of 2 or you want her to leave her husband and start cotching up with a widower, polygamist or another baby father? there's no right/wrong person to marry - if both parties work very hard to make their marriage good, it would be good!

If she is a British, American, even Lebanese citizen, she will get a hubby quite fast. All she has to do is log in to nairaland. Guys are not smiling!

jidegirl12:

Are you aware of the word 'WORK'? Yep ! that's what he's doing odę.

Your second paragraph crack me up yeah right David how old are you again? so I know I've not been wasting my time!

He works on saturday? Perhaps he is a medical professional... those are the only pros i know who work on weekends. I doubt he is though... just doesnt strike me as an intelligent dude to be married to someone like you.

Vikin:

If she is a British, American, even Lebanese citizen, she will get a hubby quite fast. All she has to do is log in to nairaland. Guys are not smiling!

no kidding lol!

Efemena_xy: And the drama continues...

Spitting vs Witch hunting...

Anyway sha, @Jide, I don open up that thread as promised.

So for anyone interested, Efe's doing her very own Mother Christmas thing the Waffi way. I dey dash out Recharge card pin numbers at this thread in a couple of hours....so spread the good news around and tell your friends.

https://www.nairaland.com/1145865/literature-writing-section-best-poster

Okay Efe.... Let me commot for here and leave this petty man boy thing called davidlan ....na jealousy go kill am!

davidylan:

He works on saturday? Perhaps he is a medical professional... those are the only pros i know who work on weekends. I doubt he is though... just doesnt strike me as an intelligent dude to be married to someone like you.

Awwww.... very close .... see na only health professionals work on Saturday? I knew it! you're very interested..... keep cracking

Me sef wey dey that line take weekends off for the kids.... keep looking dave

jidegirl12:

Awwww.... very close .... see na only health professionals work on Saturday? I knew it! you're very interested..... keep cracking

How can? bank tellers, bus drivers, prison warders, shop attendants... all work on saturdays.
Unless you're a doctor or bringing extra work home, i have hardly run into upwardly mobile professionals who dont have their weekends off.

jidegirl12:

Awwww.... very close .... see na only health professionals work on Saturday? I knew it! you're very interested..... keep cracking

Me sef wey dey that line take weekends off for the kids.... keep looking dave

You're claiming to be a doc now eh? Fat chance.

davidylan:

You're claiming to be a doc now eh? Fat chance.

Na only doctor be health professional ?! Fool!

Go back to school Dave you're just a waste of time looking for my attention!

davidylan:
Her husband is not resistant to change i agree. But i also do not buy this idea that somehow places the burden of keeping the marriage solely on the wife. If the wife were the one beating the husband, would you be advising him to just stay strong, work on his marriage and give her room to change?

of course, i would ask him to seek solutions - not bail out of his marriage because the wife is spitting on him. marriage is not a relationship people bounce in and out of especially when there are kids involved. kids complicated things - the matter is no longer me n my wife, the children are involved too. making a drastic decision regardless of their happiness is a tad self-centered.

davidylan:
Lets try to see things from the other person's perspective... would you be pleased that your brother-in-law turned your sister to a punching bag and your advice would be for her to just try to change him?

i would not be happy but at the same time, i would not ask her to leave her marriage!

By all means she should try to save her marriage but we should not wait until she is a corpse before we advocate that sometimes your life might be more important than keeping a sham marriage alive.

sham marriage? the same marriage that has produced 2 kids? abeg, which marriage is actually the perfect marriage? none! both parties do sacrifice a lot to sustain their marriage.

I disagree. You can be married to the wrong person... someone who is just not compatible with you in terms of outlook on life. For example, i am very laid back and would have a hard time being with a high strung, sharp mouthed woman... just not going to be a good match.

opposites attract - that's the kind of person you actually need. you cannot have 2 laid back characters - someone would have to be a bit high-strung.