Uuu

omo_to_dun: No, you did not make a mistake. If she leaves you after you had confessed your misdeeds, then she is not the one for you. She would have found out anyway, for truth always prevails and comes out of its hiding place no matter how long it is concealed. Imagine what would have happened if she found out decades from now after you folks, supposedly, have had children. Scary thought, isn't? But this is just hypothetical. She may be processing what you have just told her and will let you know what she has decided soon.

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First to comment.

I would like to thank Jehovah for giving me this wonderful opportunity of being the first poster on a marvelous and awesome thread. Also, I'd like to thank my mother and father for preparing me for this day, for through pain, sacrifice, and compromise, they molded me into the man I am today: a first poster.

To the Nairaland community, I salute you for making this site what it is today and for encouraging and, most importantly, tolerating me in my career of first commenting.

Allah hu akbar.

You know that is what i was thinking.... i feel she will come around but even though i love her, i have come to understand that women can be unpredictable... so i'm expecting the worse... maybe, she might juss start avoiding me!

omo_to_dun,u just have to be joking,ehn oga o.I agree with what he said,give her to time to think over it.
Op did you kill some1 when u were in cult?

luvmijeje: omo_to_dun,u just have to be joking,ehn oga o.I agree with what he said,give her to time to think over it.
Op did you kill some1 when u were in cult?

She asked me exact same thing....

I Never killed anyone...

She also asked me if i drank blood.... i was like HELL NOOO!!

luvmijeje: omo_to_dun,u just have to be joking,ehn oga o.I agree with what he said,give her to time to think over it.
Op did you kill some1 when u were in cult?

My dear, I just cannot help myself. Please forgive me. However, unlike other members of the First to Post Association of Nairaland, I don't just claim to be the first to post and not add any tangible comment.

Op then,wetin be the main thing wey u no tell?

omo_to_dun,na even get association,pls keet it up.

@OP , you should never raise sensitive topics on fone.
A girl needs reassurance when telling something like that and you know girl respond more to touch , you keep stroking and cuddled her while relaying your gory tale.
But on the fone , you just left the feminine mind wander and got lost.
.
Abeg make nobody ban omo_to_dun

You don't need to change for people to like you,the right people will love the real you,,,,I always force myself to believe it

luvmijeje: Op then,wetin be the main thing wey u no tell?

help me ask am wella o..d guy wan use spoon park our indomie

Personally, i can never tell any lady my past or any bad thing i have done in the past. Who cares if it comes up in future, i will deny it, and for all i care it may never come up. Ladies will always use ur past to frustrate u and hold it against u anytime u have any quarrel even in future, she might even tell her friends....this is from experience. Anywhere u start any relationship with any lady, thats where ur life starts, anythin before then never happened, cos talkin about ur past is always catastrophic.


Take it or leave it

Signed: by me

Na u sef tak d mata cwios..dis kind mata na play play u 4 use am do..maybe lik 1day if u re tlkin and she did smtin and u'l be lik baby "u wan mak i show u my cult side ba?"she'l be lik u?cult memba?nd u go tlk sae na play nd u go sabi sae u dn use style tel her...u sef cn kal her lik sae u dn kil b4 "baby i want 2 tel u smtn,i was a cult member"she no go leave u sha..yea!wu send me dis story?hw i take type am sef

omo_to_dun:

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First to comment.

I would like to thank Jehovah for giving me this wonderful opportunity of being the first poster on a marvelous and awesome thread. Also, I'd like to thank my mother and father for preparing me for this day, for through pain, sacrifice, and compromise, they molded me into the man I am today: a first poster.

To the Nairaland community, I salute you for making this site what it is today and for encouraging and, most importantly, tolerating me in my career of first commenting.

Allah hu akbar.

DAMMIT!

@OP: once a cultist, always a cultist. Leave that good girl to secure her future, she is wise not to want anything with a murderer! go and perform restitution for all you atrocities first if you are genuinely repentant!
... So wuz her numba?

Silly mistake you made by telling her all that bullshit. She might have had a horrendous experience with a cultist(s) before and just reopened old wounds. The only way you can win her back is to tell that you were lying and hope she believes you.

J12: Silly mistake you made by telling her all that bullshit. She might have had a horrendous experience with a cultist(s) before and just reopened old wounds. The only way you can win her back is to tell that you were lying and hope she believes you.

you know, this got me cracking!!

I really wish it was that easy.
I made a fucking mistake,.... i really wish i could take it all back... i would keep it all to myself and enjoy the guilt alone!!

yuzedo:
DAMMIT!

@OP: once a cultist, always a cultist. Leave that good girl to secure her future, she is wise not to want anything with a murderer! go and perform restitution for all you atrocities first if you are genuinely repentant!
... So wuz her numba?

i have never killed anyone!... the only big crime i committed was prolly smoking joints... ......
Big mistake!

@op, u never did anything wrong by telling her your past, she is d one that is too emotional, give her some time to ponder over it, she may later come back after thinking thoroughly about it and if she doesnt come back, then, that means she would prefer a pretender to a man who will open up to her, in that case, hope for d best, it means you are not meant for each other, your own who would prefer you opening up and even help you to get over it will come .
It is well.

@icebeatz

You did not make a mistake. It is emotionally unhealthy for you to want to cast your lot with a woman who can't forgive you for your past transgressions.

I am still holding out hope that she will return to you and that all will be well. Moreover, I'd advise you to let her in on the parts that you chose not to reveal. Either you completely confess or you don't confess at all. You have started a journey on the former path. Finish it.

U talk like a child who has never committed an offense before.
Are u a saint
We all have done something in the past that we are not proud of. As long as we recognize and repent of them, we are still God's chosen.

@icebeatz, give her some time to be on her own, is she dint come around, then leave her for good. She must love you for who u were and who u have become.
U are not the only on in it.

Just make sure u dont go back to those activities again

yuzedo:
DAMMIT!

@OP: once a cultist, always a cultist. Leave that good girl to secure her future, she is wise not to want anything with a murderer! go and perform restitution for all you atrocities first if you are genuinely repentant!
... So wuz her numba?

Who no play kush??
Its not a big deal jare!!

U shldnt have told her nything at all!

People deal with shock differently. You honestly wouldn't have expected her to react in any other way or form. At the end of the day you are someone she holds with high regards and probably never expected you to have engaged in such exuberant be it past life/present.

Give her time and she will come around.

BTW, how would you have reacted if she was the one telling you about her past and she dropped the bombshell that she had aborted about 10 times in the past?

luvmijeje: Op then,wetin be the main thing wey u no tell?

OP, ignore ds girl o.
Erm... Luvmijeje, u be costable? U dey for promotion abi?
So, OP, dnt worry urself, if she goes, it's better.
For the mean time, do ds activity:
Keep sipping pepper soup with a staw.
It works for me wen i'm down. E be like cocaine

icebeatz: (i no even tell am the main things self)....

the main thing like how many souls you murdered, idiat

tellwsdom: Bro, leave that eddiot .She's not worth sharing anythng with

You again??why do you like cursing women??why the eddiot??change this attitude towards women,if not for any reason,atleast for the fact you where conceived by one.

Don't bother cursing me because I wont let it slide.

This is a bit on the serious side sha oo. All the while she promised that she's nt gonna make a big deal out of ot, I guess she must have expected you to say something lyk u cheated on her or u've slept with her friend before you met her...as in...just d usuals. But as per cult tins, with the way society views cultists, she might be a little bit scared. And she even needs maturity and courage to be able to continue that relationship because anytime she sees u or u touch her or u talk to her, all that wld be playing in her head is that a cultist is touching her.

Back to the topic, i think the confessions should be done wisely. Also, as one of the posters pointed out, such tins should not be said on fone, u should av done it physically. Besides, sometimes, i think the emotional strength of ur partner should determine the confessions u make. For her to be ur galfriend, u should know the tinz u would tell her that would make her freak out and the things she'll be able to swallow easily. If you think your confessions are too much for your partner to handle and it's not really going to av a disastrous effect on anybody's life, most especially since u've repented, i don't see anything bad in leaving it as it is, BURIED! Good luck with this one, poster.

One thing my mother told me was not to share my past with my patner cos he was not there when it happened,but in case he finds out i shd open up without lying.she shd forget it so dat u can move on together,if u changed n she loved u when u ve not told her abt de stuff i dont see de big deal,just assure her u ve really changed.

icebeatz: I called my girlfriend and we talked all Night. Okay here is the thing........
I confessed to her about my activities as a cultist back in my university days.
Before i talked to her about it, i made her promise she wouldn't hold it against me...... She promised!

I just wanted to come clean.... like no secret history life.
I've always kept that part of my life to myself and this is the first time i opened up on how naive and stupid i was as a kid (was 18 years then). Then it was a thing of pride but looking at all i did, i regret it wholly and wish i was never part of it..... okay where was i...........

After my girlfriend promised not to hold it against me and i told her all i did (i no even tell am the main things self).... she started acting weird on the phone.... like i cant explain it.... it was like really really weird... like she just wanted to hang up... and when it was time for the "goodnites", she didnt even say "I love you" or any sweet words like she used to.

I need your advise folks....
did i do a stupid thing?
Can i ever get her to trust me again?
Do you think i should have kept my mouth sealed?
Did i make a mistake for trying to build trust and come clean!!

I dont wanna lose her..... damnnn... this happened years ago and i am a good person.... she fell in love with me... why act strange when i am trying coming clean

Guy u frk up real time .U suppose know say babes in naija no like to hear the truth.Babes prefer it when guys no dey honest with them and yes na very very stupid thing u do

The girl is smart now, what goes around comes around. OP, you have not told her "the main things". Do you think she wants to know them? That which she already knows seems enough for her. Don't kid yourself, there are people that went to school, faced their education and got out without cultism or crime. You have to be willing to accept that some people will reject you because of your past. It is the price you have to pay for the things you did- mistake or no mistake.

Of course, there will be a woman that will be ready to accept you and your past- just maybe not this one. It is better for the 2 of you to address the issue(s) now rather than in marriage.

KINGwax,dis na d 2nd time wey I notice u,abeg make am 3rd time and see whether I no go close ur acct for nairaland.

there are things you don't have to share, there even miracles you don't testify publicly. may be you confessed what you shouldn't so be prepared to bear the consequences.

icebeatz: I called my girlfriend and we talked all Night. Okay here is the thing........
I confessed to her about my activities as a cultist back in my university days.
Before i talked to her about it, i made her promise she wouldn't hold it against me...... She promised!

I just wanted to come clean.... like no secret history life.
I've always kept that part of my life to myself and this is the first time i opened up on how naive and stupid i was as a kid (was 18 years then). Then it was a thing of pride but looking at all i did, i regret it wholly and wish i was never part of it..... okay where was i...........

After my girlfriend promised not to hold it against me and i told her all i did (i no even tell am the main things self).... she started acting weird on the phone.... like i cant explain it.... it was like really really weird... like she just wanted to hang up... and when it was time for the "goodnites", she didnt even say "I love you" or any sweet words like she used to.

I need your advise folks....
did i do a stupid thing?
Can i ever get her to trust me again?
Do you think i should have kept my mouth sealed?
Did i make a mistake for trying to build trust and come clean!!

I dont wanna lose her..... damnnn... this happened years ago and i am a good person.... she fell in love with me... why act strange when i am trying coming clean