juliluv: let her be,may be she feels u're becomming a thorn in her flesh,since she said nothing is wrong just allow her. dont even bother calling her again unless u hve another intention ,lolz

I don't have other intention

DeeWan: @Lasunray: Let her alone. If that is the only thing you have done in her life, you have done well. Move on with your life. Try to get over it and match on. God will surely reward you for good. If you don't mind, you can also help me. I am also looking for job. You can let me know how to get my C.V across to you. Thanks in anticipation

Alryt. thanks. I ve heard. As for ur CV, I hope u r not a girl?

..."just kidding"

PM me

sammykaro: Guy just free your mind, you've done your part. Its just that guys like you don't help fellow guys in most cases...na woman una D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥y like help!

Hahahaha. Funny You!!
its coincidental. besides am pretty sure a guy won't behave like this.

free2ryhme:


dont make a big deal out of helping someone ( either male or female) just see ur deeds as an act of kindness... well I promise you when u time of need arises somehow somewhere you good deeds will speak for you and you will find favour .. Keep doing good and continue dont get discourage even if they dont call for you at all ... God knows whats best for you .. My one cent face your school and be optimist ... Dont get disturb by her sudden change of attitude towards you ...

Thanks! I Copy!!

ifyalways: Lesson no 1:Do good and don't expect reward from men.
no 2:Expect little from men so you don't end up disappointed.

Madam, I wasn't expecting ANY "reward from men".
Am not disappointed at all, Just exasperated.

sixteen08:


People change,people grow apart....deal with it,d best u can do 4 ursef is 2 let go n focus on d tins dat matter most in your life

Okay Sir

ypzilanti: From your post, I gather that you are young. Well listen very carefully to what I am going to tell you:

PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS DISAPPOINT YOU.

Get used to it. It is human nature.

I'm surprised that no one commenting has even deciphered the real reason behind this wahala.

The op helped a lady he had hidden affections for to get a job. The lady knows that he wants a little more and hence she is avoiding him. In her warped reasoning, she thinks she owes the guy and is avoiding an uncomfortable situation.

But my dear OP...seriously, you do not need ungrateful people in your circle of friends. Not saying she should have jumped into bed with you because you got her a job, but she should at least respect the fact that you made an impact in her life. What am I saying...maybe na you begin pester her life. Story dey sweet from the mouth of the teller.

"hidden affections"

Seriously speaking, I don't ve hidden affections; I just had that opportunity (slot) & I keyed her In.

What is your definition of "Young" Sir?

Kelvinprinzyy: i prefer helping a guy like me dan a gurl,bt most times we fall in to dat feminine voice nd physique

Maybe I was wrong by first thinking about her name In the first place, because I had other guys that would ve craved for that post.
Anyway, I ve no regrets. I ve been helped, disappointed by pple before so its not really new. I just gave this scenario a thought & opted knowing people's opinion. Thanks

Afam4eva: I think we have to learn how to help people without expecting our gesture to be reciprocated.

Why ain't you guys getting this straight?

I wasn't Expecting My Gesture To Be Reciprocated Sir!

[email][/email]maybe you are pestering her move on God will reward you if you did try to help without expecting somethin back like sex.

The painful thing is that whatever it is that she ought to have given you in 'appreciation' for getting that job, she would willfully give to another man (or men) on a platter of gold to RETAIN the job or gain promotions. FACT. That's why most of them deserve no mercy. It's a waste of time and goodwill to help them (unless they are already giving you 'appreciation' in advance).

It's much better to help your fellow men; they are most likely to return the favour in the long run. Women no be am.

@OP. For u not be dis-appointed in life, cultivate d habit of doing good deed witout expectin anythin in return. One day it will surely pay

sammykaro: Guy just free your mind, you've done your part. Its just that guys like you don't help fellow guys in most cases...na woman una D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥y like help!

Gbam

lasunray: After Helping Her To Find A Job She Boned Me

Hello Nairalanders,
Happy New Month,
I Helped a very close friend of mine to find a good job that pays close to hundred thousand naira, after her first pay she Just stopped calling, texting, keeping in touch as she does before. Its not that she is that busy because she does 2days off and 3days on (Mon to Fri).
I don't need her money; if she gives me any, I will definitely not collect.
I still try to keep in touch but she ain't reciprocating.
She gists me about the work place and other things but if I ask now, she always has nothing to say.

NB: Am still schooling.

How would you feel if you are in my shoes? I want to learn here so you candid advise will be appreciated.

First off, N100k per month is a miniscule amount of money and no reason for anyone to bone anyone.

Second of all you might be overstating the role you played in getting her the job. Anything short of recommending her to the employer is no cause to paint a picture like you gave her a job. Whether you alerted her to the vacancy, helped her do her CV or coached her for interview, it does not mean she is indebted to you forever.

Meanwhile,forget the ishh about not expecting your 'gesture' to be reciprocated. I'm sure you have many relatives and male friends/acquaintances that are also looking for a job. Even if you're Papa Charity, I'm sure others deserve that act of 'altruism' more than the fair lady. Let's not kid ourselves jare.

most of you don't read through all posts and replies and would end up repeating the same thing over and over again even after the op has replied. The OP said he wasn't expecting any returns or gesture in honour of the favour he did to her. Why una dey lazy to read like this. Why say the same thing again after the OP don reply. Una sabi provoke person here sha! Anyway OP, like others have said....move on, let her be. Inshort no call her again, bone her the same way she boned you.

after jesus healed ten lepers, only one kept in touch.........bro u have helped her and she does not want to keep in touch any longer......dont worry heaven will keep in touch with u and God will meet u at d point of ur needs....... JUST LET HER BE!!!!!!!!

ypzilanti: From your post, I gather that you are young. Well listen very carefully to what I am going to tell you:

PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS DISAPPOINT YOU.

Get used to it. It is human nature.

I'm surprised that no one commenting has even deciphered the real reason behind this wahala.

The op helped a lady he had hidden affections for to get a job. The lady knows that he wants a little more and hence she is avoiding him. In her warped reasoning, she thinks she owes the guy and is avoiding an uncomfortable situation.

But my dear OP...seriously, you do not need ungrateful people in your circle of friends. Not saying she should have jumped into bed with you because you got her a job, but she should at least respect the fact that you made an impact in her life. What am I saying...maybe na you begin pester her life. Story dey sweet from the mouth of the teller.

also, op is a student. as a 'bigger girl' she can't be seen fraternizing with small boys on legedez benz , not when she is probably being toasted by bachelors with toyota camrys [ i hate all those bachelors in my office with free money to buy correct motoi etc ] - just sayin' - no offense intended

you may become even bigger when you get a job. na so cookie dey crumble

slim fit :
[email][/email]maybe you are pestering her move on God will reward you if you did try to help without expecting somethin back like sex.

Se.x is outta it

Ibime:

First off, N100k per month is a miniscule amount of money and no reason for anyone to bone anyone.

Second of all you might be overstating the role you played in getting her the job. Anything short of recommending her to the employer is no cause to paint a picture like you gave her a job. Whether you alerted her to the vacancy, helped her do her CV or coached her for interview, it does not mean she is indebted to you forever.

I don't think the O.P is talking about indebtedness or being paid back. You help your friend get a job, and he/she stops relating with you just like that? That's not how friendship works.

Anyway, thank your God because her true self has just been revealed.

P.s: To those who think one can't be friends with the opposite sex without expecting some form of sexual relationship to exist, my advice is that you should work on your social skills. Not everything is about pant, bra and bed.

pro01: The painful thing is that whatever it is that she ought to have given you in 'appreciation' for getting that job, she would willfully give to another man (or men) on a platter of gold to RETAIN the job or gain promotions. FACT. That's why most of them deserve no mercy. It's a waste of time and goodwill to help them (unless they are already giving you 'appreciation' in advance).

It's much better to help your fellow men; they are most likely to return the favour in the long run. Women no be am.

Hmmmm. comprehended

homosapien: @OP. For u not be dis-appointed in life, cultivate d habit of doing good deed witout expectin anythin in return. One day it will surely pay

Thank You Sir

Ibime:

First off, N100k per month is a miniscule amount of money and no reason for anyone to bone anyone.

Second of all you might be overstating the role you played in getting her the job. Anything short of recommending her to the employer is no cause to paint a picture like you gave her a job. Whether you alerted her to the vacancy, helped her do her CV or coached her for interview, it does not mean she is indebted to you forever.

guy, sometimes a little bit of help [even if it is coaching for interview] can make a BIG difference, especially in naija where jobs are not lined up waiting for peeps.

and 100k per month is a big deal - just ask the grads in my neighbourhood who have been sitting at home for over 2 years. not everyone can get oil company job straight up

Ibime:

First off, N100k per month is a miniscule amount of money and no reason for anyone to bone anyone.

Second of all you might be overstating the role you played in getting her the job. Anything short of recommending her to the employer is no cause to paint a picture like you gave her a job. Whether you alerted her to the vacancy, helped her do her CV or coached her for interview, it does not mean she is indebted to you forever.

Yea. sure! she deserves the job. She wrote a test & went for interview.

U neva se any ting guy, I gave my dying GF both of my kidney 2do her trasplant n wen she recoverd she left me, girls ve half brain If u dnt kno

@ Op, I learnt u still planning 2 connect her 2 enter Chevron? Abeg help ur guy, I need job too,lol
Such is life, continue doing good 2 people, don't let her attitude put u off, some people are like that.

pro01: Meanwhile,forget the ishh about not expecting your 'gesture' to be reciprocated. I'm sure you have many relatives and male friends/acquaintances that are also looking for a job. Even if you're Papa Charity, I'm sure others deserve that act of 'altruism' more than the fair lady. Let's not kid ourselves jare.

yes. u r right!

lasunray: After Helping Her To Find A Job She Boned Me

Hello Nairalanders,
Happy New Month,
I Helped a very close friend of mine to find a good job that pays close to hundred thousand naira, after her first pay she Just stopped calling, texting, keeping in touch as she does before. Its not that she is that busy because she does 2days off and 3days on (Mon to Fri).
I don't need her money; if she gives me any, I will definitely not collect.
I still try to keep in touch but she ain't reciprocating.
She gists me about the work place and other things but if I ask now, she always has nothing to say.

NB: Am still schooling.

How would you feel if you are in my shoes? I want to learn here so you candid advise will be appreciated.

Listen, try make yourself comfortable and women will look for you. Yes, you have helped her but she must have kick started relationship at her work place, naybe the boss of the place she is working.
Before helping a woman, always try to make sure that you are comfortable because most ladies tend to forget too early when you help them stand. Also understand that someone who don't like you cannot love you out of sympathy. That is to say, because you helped me, let me continue with you. Its not good. Maybe she doesnt want you but needed an assistance from you and you dont have to force yourself on her. First say what you wanted from her was more than what she want from you

igbsam: most of you don't read through all posts and replies and would end up repeating the same thing over and over again even after the op has replied. The OP said he wasn't expecting any returns or gesture in honour of the favour he did to her. Why una dey lazy to read like this. Why say the same thing again after the OP don reply. Una sabi provoke person here sha! Anyway OP, like others have said....move on, let her be. Inshort no call her again, bone her the same way she boned you.

thanks. am tryin a straight face.
I just dey imagine say "if to say I no help her get the job, we for still be correct paddy o"

avalontony: after jesus healed ten lepers, only one kept in touch.........bro u have helped her and she does not want to keep in touch any longer......dont worry heaven will keep in touch with u and God will meet u at d point of ur needs....... JUST LET HER BE!!!!!!!!

Sure!

A friend of mine was dating this girl who had both bones on her legs fractured in an accident. She was abandoned by her family to the mercy of this guy.
Dude cleaned, wahsed, cooked and fed her for months. He also took care of the hospital bills.

When she got well, he helped her find another job.

To his surprise, the girl stopped picking his calls a month into her new job. The way the girl shuns him became so ridiculous.
Latest news is that the girl is in a serious marriage talks with another dude.

@ op

I feel the girl thinks you may want something more after the help. But at least, she should have waited for you to ask for such before being so cold towards you.

Forget her. She doesn't matter to you.

Whichever way, never grow weary in helping others. Nature has a way of paying back.