The responses given by women on this thread are a joke. I wonder how women want to be taken seriously when this is how they reason.

Ujujoan: What will make me dis-respect him
Errrm . . . let me see . .
1. If he lies and I find out
2. If he disrespects me first
3. If he refuses to listen to reason, I just ignore him and go ahead and do what I want to (does that count as disrespect )

You will be a nagging and disrespectful wife..it is all evident from no 3. may God help ur husband

Infidelity and arrogance

BukkyDan: God forbids it!
I'd never disrespect him! From what I've seen in my parents marriage, I'd never do that. He loses his job, he does what ever, so far he's still my hubby, that respect would forever be there.

Gosh! Some ladies ehn!

Great testmony. Like mother like daughter. Please work hard to pass this also to your children. God bless your mother in Jesus namei

@nwando i was thaking you for a serious person until you mentioned the 419.

In the first place, there is no evidence to show that the man disrespected her when he had a job. Why cant you just accept it that you ladies are devils! Accept it already that the only thing that makes you women thick is money! Accept it that most women including you are shallow.

E

Ujujoan: What will make me dis-respect him
Errrm . . . let me see . .
1. If he lies and I find out
2. If he disrespects me first
3. If he refuses to listen to reason, I just ignore him and go ahead and do what I want to (does that count as disrespect )

warri tout

nwando:
Bunkum!

Airhead!

What the lady in the story did could be considered as an immatured behaviour. Yea i can disrespect my hubby but only in private. Just between the 2 of us. And not in the presense of a third party no matter the gravity of the issue at hand. One important ingredient of marriage is FORGIVENESS.


As an advise to the married couple in the house, please fight your fight behind closed doors. It shows that LOVE IS ALL THAT MATTERS. It also show maturity and it shows you are a good ambassador of your parent. Wealth is a visitor, give it a remarkable outing and it will not depart from you buy dont worship money.

herseys01:
Please take several seats. Its people like you that think women should stay in abusive relationships. Fine it says sumbit, but when you sumbit and it is thrown in your face. It is ok to be angry. Even Jesus showed anger when he saw people trading in his father's house (matthew 21:12). If a woman has pent her life sumbitting and she is taken for a fool, I approve when she showes anger. Nobody deserves to be treated badly. Love does not say we should become foot mats. Love with sense, if you love and sumbit and you are killed in the process OYO lo wa. The man will marry in few weeks or months self and your kids will suffer ehn.

Ephesian 5:33, "Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband"

I noticed anger at the background of your points. I think to disrespect your husband before visitors is equally an abuse. So, are you saying the man should equally leave the marriage too. Well, I don't know if you are a victim of an abusive relationship before.

See the essence of marriage is this: Genesis 1:28, "And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him". Is your husband lonely? Also, the help that needs to be met in my family may be different from yours. We need to be careful what our society portray marriage to be! That was the fundamental role of a woman and prior to that time there was no need for one.

This was how she came about: Genesis 2:22, "And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man". The man must see her as part of himself and cherish her.

We need to be careful about what our society portray marriage to be! Also, the devil is always against the unity of marriage from the beginning. Therefore, we need to daily go back to God in serious parayers to ask a) how can I love my wife as myself today? b) how can I be a help meet to my husband today?


Marriage is not for babies. It takes determination to make it work. We must always refer to the basics (101). Forget about the funny stuffs you see on media.

Concerning submission, Jesus said in Mathew "11:29, Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls". If you are not ready to do what he says why do you want to go into marriage in the first place?. We need wisdom not anger to BUILD our home and anger will only destroy it. Good luck!!!

I once said on this forum that women are naturally disrespectful, one mumu was tellin me trash. You need to ask yoursef why the bible says wives should respect their husbands. Pls go through the responses from ladies here to verify this ascertion. Why shd u disrespect your husband bcs he lost his job or wateva reason? The issue is most gals have bin configured in a particular format ( by media and friends) and even b4 gettin married they have told themselves what to do at particular times. Pls look up, respect is nt conditional.
Bt like iv alwaz told mysef, its nt impossible to find a decent and respectful gal, dey are out there, locate one and appreciate her. Bt for those rude ones, listen up, u have chosen a failed marital life and only God will deliver the man that will fall prey to you. Men need to watch and pray. Na those disrespectful gals plenty pass
Marriage is to be enjoyed and once you marry a rude gal FORGET IT.

@ OP...With the response i have read so far on this thread especially from ladies, I have come to the conclusion that many a Nigerian lady are not nubile. I am also impressed with the comments of many a few here. No matter the situation, there is no justifiable reason for either spouse to disrespect the other in public, and that it's a woman who is doing it to her husband, the more wrong it is. Dirty linens should be sorted in private. #MY TOKEN#

Wow that woman is very wicked. This means that When she was taking her vows for better and worse and richer and poor she did not mean it. Nothing should make you disrespect your spouse, yes there will be arguments and disagreements but this is just totally...(have no words) Really feel sorry for this guy

wife disrespect to husband is multifaceted.

disrespect from the wife is then ABUSIVE and if its abusive then it could be physically or verbally.

wife abusing the husband is mostly verbal and ladies caught up in such act are suffering from personality disorder.

I am current a victim of an abusive relationship. When I was holding a job, she will loose her mind and wash me down, accuse for things I am not even guilty of, and calls me names. Then I lost my job and hell broke loose. I even started thinking I most have done stuff for her to be abusing me this way, i even consider beating her up whenever she abuses me but then I will be doing what I swore never to do!
I have to research abusive relationship and what constitute it, then I discovered that I am in one already. women that abuse their husband do it because it is in their make-up to abuse the very person closest to them.
these women are victims of childhood abuse from their caregivers and these had injured their psychological make-up.

these abusers are suffering from one form of personality disorder or the other, but mostly borderline personality disorder plus any other.

Today I have a book I am reading titled 'STOP WALKING ON EGGS SHELLS". Its teaching how to regain my psychology.

I am ready to share this book

Right...spouses should not air their dirty linen in public. Regardless of whatever, Its wrong for a woman to insult her husband in the presence of strangers for that matter! Second; what d hell was d man telling "people on evangelism" what happens in his home for? How his wife no longer respects him after he lost his job. Did he know them before Tells d kind of person he is; narrating his whole family life to mere stangers!!!! Pooh!

I can't imagine myself in such a situation.my wife disrespect me?
For NO reason must a woman dsrespect a MAN.

From the comments im reading here, its very glaring that most ladies will disrespect their husbands if he cant provide for his home.
It’s so hard to admit that our generation has lost it and this issue will only get worse. Come to think of it, how many gals will agree to date a jobless guy? Guys please share your experience, how were you treated by gals when you weren’t financially empowered. I am a living testimony, only very few gals will listen to you wen u cant meet their financial need. Now, are we expecting miracles? These are the same gals we are talking abt. A gal who wouldn’t accept you as a bf wen u are broke will only frustrate u as a wife wen u cant provide for her and will call u an infidel. Only God will save us. Guys, stop dating gals who chase money, they are nt hard to identified, If u wanna have a happy home, run frm such gals, na dem plenty pass.

victorian: Nothing will make me disrespect my husband.. Thank God, am buoyant .. He takes care of me , when he is bouyant with cash, why would i want to resent him, if things go wrong moneywise.... nah, God forbid, money is not forth coming from my hussy , there's nothing wrong in assisting our family, financially and spiritually until he bounces back.. It will break my heart to even raise my voice on him... I can't even try it... My mind will not rest at all!... It's wrong!.... Except if he is a serial cheat... I can't stand cheaters...I guess that's the only reason to disrespect him ...but I can't sha.

THATS IT! I ABHOR CHEATING IF MY HUBBY TRIES THAT SHIT WITH ME,I WILL CRIPPLE HIM .AND YES I WAS A VIRGIN AND YES I DON'T LUST AFTER ANY GUY ONLY MI HUBBY

oleku baby:
As an advise to the married couple in the house, please fight your fight behind closed doors. It shows that LOVE IS ALL THAT MATTERS. It also show maturity and it shows you are a good ambassador of your parent. Wealth is a visitor, give it a remarkable outing and it will not depart from you buy dont worship money.

Lovely advice on the transience of wealth

I really pity the next generation of children and their subsequent attitude to marriage if today, aspring mothers or current moms feel it is justified to disrespect a man because he has lost his means of livelihood

vanstanzy: I bet for most of the ladys, the answer will go like this; he has no money to take care of me n (my kids) and he cant f--k me hard. FALSE?

notin boi....are u a woman?

Talking: @ OP...With the response i have read so far on this thread especially from ladies, I have come to the conclusion that many a Nigerian lady are not nubile. I am also impressed with the comments of many a few here. No matter the situation, there is no justifiable reason for either spouse to disrespect the other in public, and that it's a woman who is doing it to her husband, the more wrong it is. Dirty linens should be sorted in private. #MY TOKEN#

nubile... i think you meant ductile

switosman: wife disrespect to husband is multifaceted.

disrespect from the wife is then ABUSIVE and if its abusive then it could be physically or verbally.

wife abusing the husband is mostly verbal and ladies caught up in such act are suffering from personality disorder.

I am current a victim of an abusive relationship. When I was holding a job, she will loose her mind and wash me down, accuse for things I am not even guilty of, and calls me names. Then I lost my job and hell broke loose. I even started thinking I most have done stuff for her to be abusing me this way, i even consider beating her up whenever she abuses me but then I will be doing what I swore never to do!
I have to research abusive relationship and what constitute it, then I discovered that I am in one already. women that abuse their husband do it because it is in their make-up to abuse the very person closest to them.
these women are victims of childhood abuse from their caregivers and these had injured their psychological make-up.

these abusers are suffering from one form of personality disorder or the other, but mostly borderline personality disorder plus any other.

Today I have a book I am reading titled 'STOP WALKING ON EGGS SHELLS". Its teaching how to regain my psychology.

I am ready to share this book

Thanks for sharing your experience. I think you can find a better thread to air male-oriented abuse here https://www.nairaland.com/1059020/men-please-talk-verbal-mental
How can we get a copy of the book, is it an e-book

Nothing should

kimakazee: I love this lady! Pls if u hav a sister with ur attitude or u knw any pls let me knw cheiii ur husband is living d life ooo, i wish 2 b in his shoes.

I bet if you see ladies with this attribute, u close ur eyes. Sometimes you guys love cosmetic ladies to natural and down to earth ladies. You go for miss endowed and all. Nothing wrong with endowed women but attitude or character should be looked into. You only cry out when you experience crisis like this.

Both need to respect each others. Simple.

i dont think anything can make me disrespect my husband

Hmmm, see ladies advertising themselves with beautiful comments..... this is interesting.

Unknown Member:


Did he remind her that he was a Spartan?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
MY EWU MAKE ME LAUGH OOOOOOO!
fUNNY PET

herseys01:

People are so quick to judge from the outside. You can not say what really happened between this man and his wife. Dont get me wrong, I do not condone this behaviour, but some men are the lowest scums on earth. This has happened to one of my friends. When she came to the US, she could not work immediately, she was dependent on her husband. He treated her like trash, controlling every aspect of her life. Now she has a job and he doesnt. She makes his life miserable. That why they say "be nice to people you meet on your way up, cos you will surely meet them on your way down". I do not support what she does, but the man surely deserves every bit of it.

i find it hard to believe dat u don't support it!cos d way u typd dz.....

@nwando i dnt want to say u knw nxt to nothng.who told u women can't b devilish?go buy dstv dy watch 'women dat kill' make we hear word jor

i dnt blame any lady supportn dz woman in dz story,shebi u av brotherz nd cousins(male) ?dnt be surprisd wen their wives use them as househelpz nd finally ruin their life!

dallyemmy:

Ephesian 5:33, "Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband"

I noticed anger at the background of your points. I think to disrespect your husband before visitors is equally an abuse. So, are you saying the man should equally leave the marriage too. Well, I don't know if you are a victim of an abusive relationship before.

See the essence of marriage is this: Genesis 1:28, "And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him". Is your husband lonely? Also, the help that needs to be met in my family may be different from yours. We need to be careful what our society portray marriage to be! That was the fundamental role of a woman and prior to that time there was no need for one.

This was how she came about: Genesis 2:22, "And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man". The man must see her as part of himself and cherish her.

We need to be careful about what our society portray marriage to be! Also, the devil is always against the unity of marriage from the beginning. Therefore, we need to daily go back to God in serious parayers to ask a) how can I love my wife as myself today? b) how can I be a help meet to my husband today?


Marriage is not for babies. It takes determination to make it work. We must always refer to the basics (101). Forget about the funny stuffs you see on media.

Concerning submission, Jesus said in Mathew "11:29, Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls". If you are not ready to do what he says why do you want to go into marriage in the first place?. We need wisdom not anger to BUILD our home and anger will only destroy it. Good luck!!!

You are just quoting bible verses, back them up with reasonable arguments. Yeah a woman came from the rib etc. African men have this mentality that a man can do anything and get away with it, but when a woman does the same thing, they jump and shout foul. If it was the man who disrespected his wife, Im sure this forum wont go like this. Some people will say he was correcting her, he is trying to discipline her, he is the head of the family, all sorts of rubbish. Also this man was not blind when he married, only if the girl was very good at pretending. That is why we should pray before marrying. The Bible gives two acceptable reasons for divorce: the first is in the case of abandonment of a Christian by an unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15), and the second is if one partner is involved in a lifestyle of infidelity (Matthew 5:32). It is only an unbeliever that will maltreat his wife. Even man's best friend (a dog) can only take so much abuse before they bite. People should not take loyalty for foolishness. No one knows what transpired between the man and his wife, so dont judge her. Most men will use the good girls as girlfriends and marry the wrong ones, that is nobody's fault. Who knows what the man has done in his youth. Karma is a b*tch. I had a neighbour who was very wealthy then, he would not even pay his children's school fees. He preferred to go to peppersoup joints, he hardly gave his wife money. He became gravely ill and lost his job. The woman became the breadwinner, even with that she was never disrespectful, the man will take her money to use for beer etc. One day she talked rudely to him, he began to cry. people who were not there in the beginning will say the woman is mean. If the man has done no wrong and the woman is mean, God will deal with her.

m.dee:


i find it hard to believe dat u don't support it!cos d way u typd dz.....

@nwando i dnt want to say u knw nxt to nothng.who told u women can't b devilish?go buy dstv dy watch 'women dat kill' make we hear word jor

i dnt blame any lady supportn dz woman in dz story,shebi u av brotherz nd cousins(male) ?dnt be surprisd wen their wives use them as househelpz nd finally ruin their life!

Typing it the way I see it does not mean I support it. We do not live with these people behind closed doors so what's the fuss about. My husband treats me with respect so I resect him. Respect is reciprocal, you cannot command respect. If I was in an abusive marriage, I am sure I could only take soooo much before I fight back.

@ All. A man should always be in charge whether loaded or not. It is not enough for a man to lose his sense of self worth at home or anywhere for that matter because he loses his job. If you lose your job as a man don't take shit and always let your woman know she should accord you respect you deserve always. And let her know every time rhat you will regain your lost fortune. Don't ever look dejected to any woman. Once they see that, they start to treat you a pinch of saltand you look your respect. Women are the same. It is you as a man that should always show a sanguine outlook

I wonder what happened to

"For better or worse, In illness and health" ..