I'm a lady in my mid -twenties, who happened to have met this guy. he knows everything about me and i always ask him to share things with me also. we talk about the future a lot with the hope that we get married someday and we have been going strong. Last week during our one to many conversations, he told me a secret that he used to be a cultist, however stopped. But recently i found that he is still one oo and cant denounce or he will die but just stopped being active. I love him but he doesn't even know the implication of still being one. He says he cant say somethings or else or even leave like that... I'm really confused at this point. I want to get married and have a wonderful life but with a Cultist,,, errm I dont think so.

Has anyone particularly females ever been in this situation? what did you do?

mifan: I'm a lady in my mid -twenties, who happened to have met this guy. he knows everything about me and i always ask him to share things with me also. we talk about the future a lot with the hope that we get married someday and we have been going strong. Last week during our one to many conversations, he told me a secret that he used to be a cultist, however stopped. But recently i found that he is still one oo and cant denounce or he will die but just stopped being active. I love him but he doesn't even know the implication of still being one. He says he cant say somethings or else or even leave like that... I'm really confused at this point. I want to get married and have a wonderful life but with a Cultist,,, errm I dont think so.

Has anyone particularly females ever been in this situation? what did you do?

Cult as in university cult or cult a in freemasons/lodge style cult?

University cult but since graduated now. However it's still very much part of his life

mifan: University cult but since graduated now. However it's still very much part of his life

How serious? Did the person kill anyone? Drugs selling? Other forms of crime and hooliganism involved? Do his cult buddies still turn up to see him? What if rival cults want to attack him for his past indiscretions?

Does he really wanna leave cultism?

he wants to he says but he cant for some reason saying they would kill him. Not quite sure on the activities he might. he said he has stopped seeing any of them. But these says when we go out to see any of his friends I often wonder whether they too might also be cultist...

wow....this is some serious isht

He can't leave... Since he didn't leave when he was in school when the risk of getting a hit is greater, why do u want to believe that he will quit now that he has graduated?. It is possible but highly impossible to denounce and successfully leave a cult group without the group reacting in a violent way. Do u know the name of the frat?.

Its better you quit the relationship right away,He cannot leave unless he die.....This is what we are saying,Good girls falling for bad guys

If ladies should start judging guys with their activities as students, definitely 85% might remain unmarried.

OP. I still don't see a point in your write up compared to the topic

byvan: If ladies should start judging guys with their activities as students, definitely 85% might remain unmarried.

Thank you

Ch@nges:
OP. I still don't see a point in your write up compared to the topic

Thank you

byvan: If ladies should start judging guys with their activities as students, definitely 85% might remain unmarried.

so you mean she must stay?

take time to know sister and remember that the past will always be part of someone. if i were you i would run because i do not want any future pain.

Monicasque:

so you mean she must stay?

That's not what she said.

The op is the one with the story, just drop your response and move on.

Godson201333: Its better you quit the relationship right away,He cannot leave unless he die.....This is what we are saying,Good girls falling for bad guys

unfortunately I dont know which of them.

Monicasque: take time to know sister and remember that the past will always be part of someone. if i were you i would run because i do not want any future pain.

Thanks

mifan:

unfortunately I dont know which of them.

Am i the only one seeing your posts as pointless?

tpia@:


That's not what she said.

The op is the one with the story, just drop your response and move on.

you have issues

Monicasque:

so you mean she must stay?

Must ke?thats her choice to make . What if he never confessed?wouldn't she have married him?

byvan:


Must ke?thats her choice to make . What if he never confessed?wouldn't she have married him?

that is why we are always told to ''TAKE TIME TO KNOW HIM'' . I think its good that she found this out before marriage so that she can weigh her options. You are right, its her decision to make but she must also make sure that she does not in future regret her decision

tpia@:


Am i the only one seeing your posts as pointless?

My response was based on the enquiry and I only want to get as many diverse views on this.

mifan:

My response was based on the enquiry and I only want to get as many diverse views on this.

Which diverse views do you need on a matter that concerns only you?

And do you not have parents, friends and associates to give you advice?

Just asking.

Even if u'r 1, it'll never change d fact that modern school cultism is a tomfoolery

mifan: he wants to he says but he cant for some reason saying they would kill him. Not quite sure on the activities he might. he said he has stopped seeing any of them. But these says when we go out to see any of his friends I often wonder whether they too might also be cultist...

all na wash. the gangs in Nigerian universities that we refer to as cult groups are not as rigid and strong as people are made to believe. any day he truly wants to give up that life all he has to do is walk away and not look back, no one will come to hunt him. the truth is he wants to quit but does not know any other life apart from being in a gang. you have to make him see other things worth doing and help him get into other activities and aid with his reorientation. some people do it through religion other through counseling. you just have to keep him engaged during his withdrawal people lest he relapses cos like hard drugs, gang life is addictive

It's possible for him to leave if he wants to(although it's not easy if he's a top ranker). He's not the first person and won't be the last. Some of these boys don't want to leave cos of other favours they get. A good no of top executives in banks and other multinationals belong to one fraternity or the other and they help their members secure jobs and get connections to people that matter. There are cultists in banks,oil firms,telecoms,breweries,political parties and even security agencies. The incentives to stay behind now might be higher than what's on offer if he leaves. But trust me,when your friend is ready to leave,he will tell you. If he's already working,ask him how he got his job(if it's through connection or not).

i hope he is happy seeing his life spread all across the gossip tabloids.

that's all!

The guy came clean and confessed and you still wonder if his friends are cultists. Do you have a good reason to suspect they might be or are you making your assumptions based on knowing his past. Find out if the guy is sincere in having a better future and then help him make it happen. Dont let his past drag it down.

tpia@:
i hope he is happy seeing his life spread all across the gossip tabloids.

that's all!

Goshhhhhhhhh whats wrong with you?