9jamum: @Phineas, @Nikkykay, @nep2ra @anitank ( your story melts my heart) @josite @SniperInADiaper amongs others
I want to appreciate you for ur comments.

Thank u

Next on singlenaijamum.com is what the law says about all of this. Keep a date with this page
www.singlenaijamum.com

lola.luv:
IMHO, it's a million times better than all the abortions you people do up and down.

Let him that is seksually pure and untouched cast the first stone. Hypocritical pretenders.

When it's time for premarital séx, you are quick to forget that our culture is against it. You indulge in it but are quick to judge others who are better than you because they chose not to abort.

nikkykay:
Thanks dear.
We will all get there.

Thank you 4 ds post.
People are quick to judge single mums esp when its out of wedlock but see not bad in abortion.
I will never encourage abortion even i f u r a 15yrs old girl cos i once did it and i cried d whole time.
It got to a stage i culdnt get pregnant for yearsssssss despite d fact dat i was having s3x and i was so scared thinking d abortion had damaged my womb.
I became so worried dat i was running from one doctor to another.
When i got ds one, i tot d relationship wuld work but like 6mths into it, i began to brace myself up dat i shld be ready to be ready to have and raise her all alone.
If God has not condemned me, who is man to condemn me and i will be moved?

lola.luv:


It takes a lot of guts to have a baby, rather than taking the easy way out and aborting.
It is a good thing you're doing. May God bless you with a man that wouldn't be fazed by the fact that you have a child and would love her like his own. Amen.

lola.luv:


It takes a lot of guts to have a baby, rather than taking the easy way out and aborting.
It is a good thing you're doing. May God bless you with a man that wouldn't be fazed by the fact that you have a child and would love her like his own. Amen.

SniperInADiaper:

I think abortion takes guts too.

nikkykay:
It takes guts but wit loads of guilts wit it

SniperInADiaper:

Exactly. .. ive never experienced it. Can't imagine the guilt that would come with it. For me that would be harder than being a single mum

cantell: Chei! See the way these silly ladies are parting themselves at the back cos they had a child out of wedlock.
Any woman who gets pregnant for a man who she's not married to, is a complete congo!
Some even had an abortion and yet it didn't teach them a lesson.
They still got pregnant again and held their head high like say na achievement!
Whats the purpose of pills, condoms and other means of preventing unwanted pregnancy? No be to avoid belle?
Abortion is even the last resort.
Some of these silly women deliberately take in for a guy in the hope of keeping a brother down, but God knows it doesn't always work.
When a guy rejects their baby, they come to Nl and talk about how good it feels to be a single mother.
Always remember to narrate the both sides of the story.

teemilo:


Complete congo! ! Really!
Contrary to what happens in your village, a lot of women are still very fertile! Therefore all it takes is a broken condom to get pregnant even after taking postinor within 24hrs.
I should know because that's exactly what happened to me.

cantell:
Fertile indeed! A round of applause! Better still, get yourself a trophy!
Postionor works within 120hrs and not 24hrs.
Even if it doesn't work, there are still drugs that can still stop you from getting pregnant.
It's not my fault you're so naive and ignorant. You should have known the consequences before jumping into bed with someone.
I can only commend single motherhood if the woman is a widow or divorced(with good reason).
Any child raised out of wedlock can never have a complete childhood.
Regardless of how good, hardworking and intelligent the mother might be, that child will always be a Bastaard in the eyes of people. That is something i wouldn't wanna live with.
So, don't brag about being a single mother, it's not an achievement and it never will.
If you truly want to be a good mother to your child, when she grows up, advice her not to make the same mistake that you did.

cantell:
Fertile indeed! A round of applause! Better still, get yourself a trophy!
Postionor works within 120hrs and not 24hrs.
Even if it doesn't work, there are still drugs that can still stop you from getting pregnant.
It's not my fault you're so naive and ignorant. You should have known the consequences before jumping into bed with someone.
I can only commend single motherhood if the woman is a widow or divorced(with good reason).
Any child raised out of wedlock can never have a complete childhood.
Regardless of how good, hardworking and intelligent the mother might be, that child will always be a Bastaard in the eyes of people. That is something i wouldn't wanna live with.
So, don't brag about being a single mother, it's not an achievement and it never will.
If you truly want to be a good mother to your child, when she grows up, advice her not to make the same mistake that you did.

vivianc:

This is a very shallow way of reasoning.

supaeagles:
very true. Also note, some women cannot bear children for various medical reasons, choice etc, they are also equally real women (imho)

idprincess: its not until u biologically bear a child that u qualify to be called mother

SniperInADiaper:

Really SMH

idprincess: Modified

geoger: No woman would love to raise her child or children without the help of the other person.but what if something happened along the way. here is my story, plz I need ur suggestions becos I don't know what I am becoming.my husband and I got married traditionally. we traveled abroad together, we lived as husband and wife for 8months, he bought a ring for me and for himself. our pastor then bless us as husband and wife, so we still live together for another 2Months before I became pregnant. all this while I never knew my husband has a problem of abuse. I was six months pregnant when we had our first quarrel. I gave birth to a baby boy. my baby was 2Months, when he beat me for no good reason he abused me verbally. due to the place we r staying I don't speak the language and their is nobody to run to I stayed with him and the abuse continued, when I call my parents they will only talk what he tell them is what I don't know sometimes they will even blame me. so that make me to stay for years been abuse by the man I love. after five-years we came back to Nigeria. we stay together for months and he left me and the children and went back although he sent money for our feeding. he came back after one year to rent a house for me and the kids. he stayed two months wit us. he will be aside the whole day coming back home sometimes 11pm. his phone never rest, women call him when ever.he still beat me up becos I answer his phone a lady was calling him around 10.45pm, and he is sleeping, she called 3times the fourth one I answered it.so the following day he without and came in and started beating me again this time in public.becos we live wit other people in our compound, some married. now he has traveled again for months now living me and the kids again. together with the shame of embracing me in the public, he even broke my phone. the told my little brother that he is go to marry another woman. my problem now is the way one woman use to talk to me. we r not quarreling but she will be talking to me indirect calling me a single mother. asking my son where is the father it really gets me angry. so plz for those of u out there who understand what am going through, plz do make ur contributions.I even saw a condom in his box.

cantell: Chei! See the way these silly ladies are parting themselves at the back cos they had a child out of wedlock.
Any woman who gets pregnant for a man who she's not married to, is a complete congo!
Some even had an abortion and yet it didn't teach them a lesson.
They still got pregnant again and held their head high like say na achievement!
Whats the purpose of pills, condoms and other means of preventing unwanted pregnancy? No be to avoid belle?
Abortion is even the last resort.
Some of these silly women deliberately take in for a guy in the hope of keeping a brother down, but God knows it doesn't always work.
When a guy rejects their baby, they come to Nl and talk about how good it feels to be a single mother.
Always remember to narrate the both sides of the story.

nikkykay:

I know one of ur family members is a single mother! Do u call her kids bastards?

TheCongo:

The dictionary defines the word bastard as follow:
Born of parents not married to each other; illegitimate.

So, why all this fussing and fighting whenever someone use the word bastard in reference to children born out of wedlock.
TheCongo

lola.luv:
IMHO, it's a million times better than all the abortions you people do up and down.

Let him that is seksually pure and untouched cast the first stone. Hypocritical pretenders.

When it's time for premarital séx, you are quick to forget that our culture is against it. You indulge in it but are quick to judge others who are better than you because they chose not to abort.

jidewin:
And must all 'quickies' or 'lovers weekend' end up with pregnancies??



The issue here is not about the promiscous act but the status of women raising child(ren) without their father for reasons outside the demise of the man.

If the boy/man wouldn't want to be responsible,then why have a child for him and face the societal criticism?

mollytinrox: You see why I find some men puke worthy.

You come here ranting and raving about pills, abortion and condoms, calling children born out of wedlock ba$tards. I declare you to be very very stewpid! Infact, your glorying in idiocy knows no bounds.

Mr. Total Idiot, before you go about wearing your cloak of self righteousness, read our lips: WE DIDN'T PLAN TO BE SINGLE MOTHERS!!

Its mawderfawkers like you who cause women to swallow every pill and send them to the TTC thread on NL when you're done. What's so shitty hard to understand in the fact that we chose life over death? We chose labor pains over the pinching pangs of a curette? If you don't like it, go and hang on a tree. I can't be bothered by shallow minded low lifers who just open their mouths and judge everyone.

Nikky didn't give it to you hot. I had to.

Yenyenyenyenyenyenyen.

Nonsense

TheCongo:

The dictionary defines the word bastard as follow:
Born of parents not married to each other; illegitimate.

So, why all this fussing and fighting whenever someone use the word bastard in reference to children born out of wedlock.

TheCongo

jidewin:
And must all 'quickies' or 'lovers weekend' end up with pregnancies??



The issue here is not about the promiscous act but the status of women raising child(ren) without their father for reasons outside the demise of the man.

If the boy/man wouldn't want to be responsible,then why have a child for him and face the societal criticism?

teemilo:


This comment is the most outlandish thing I have ever read.
"Why have a child for him and face the societal criticism"

Quick answer because I am brave, courageous&full of love. Society be damned! I didn't ask to get pregnant but God forbid that I will kill my baby because his birth offends the sensibilities of some hypocrites.

My son was unplanned but not(even for a split second) unwanted

By the way,no one had a child for 'him' he might be the biological father but that does not make him God!!A child is a blessing&a responsibility from God&i had a duty to bring him to the world, his father will answer for his own actions.
It so crazy how some men think sha...

teemilo:


Mister man, the dictionary defines 'bastard' as a derogatory word used to refer to children born out of wedlock. It is not merely a descriptive word but an insulting word. A similar word is the word nigger, it means black man but its a derogatory word which connotes slavery and inequality.

Everyone knows bastard is an insult, its ridiculous to see that adults feel no shame or remorse insulting innocent children and can even attempt to justify it.

nikkykay:
Mr congo,
In my own dico, dat word doesnt exist.
Get that into ur fat skull.
Your child may still b a basta3d for the fact dat he or she is born into a legal marriage if u dont know dat cos having children in marriage doesnt mean dey will be responsible in life.