hi nairalanders

pls advice my friend he met a girl 6 month ago the first month that they met my friend propose
to her she said she has a boyfriend and my friend said to her that she can give a trial and
consider his proposal they become friend as time pass by 2-3 month they girl fall in love with my
friend my friend ask her aboutthe former guy she said she has nothing to do with the guy
now this month mind you the former guy has spend a lot on this girl now this month when my friend and
the girl where talking on phone the girl bring out the issue that her mind is on that guy and my friiend my friend
was angry with her that why will she said that she said she just need to open up for my friend
because of the love she has for my friend my friend ask her that who is her mind choosing among both
she said my friend but because the former guy has spent alot on her that she doesn't know hoe to tell him and mind u
they are still dating and the guy is still spending on her and the guy is not aware of
what is going on and she said to my friend that not all girls can open up the way she open up
to my friend that because of the love and she said to my friend to come and visit her in
the school to spend some weeks with her my friend told her that the issue is depressing him
and he is not happy about it the girl reply to him that he should not allow that to bother him. PLS KINDLY ADVICE MY FRIEND
ON THIS ISSUE DID HE NEED TO CONTINUE AND DOES HE STAND A BETTER CHANCE IN THIS SITUATION
RESPONSIBLE AND GOOD ADVICE ONLY THANKS IN ADVANCE

The first thing is to admit that it happened to you

This your english nawa but I'm starting to learn how to comprehend such. Much thanks to Nairaland
Back to point, what's he doing with a lady that has a boyfriend? For all he cares, he might be the side-kick, most especially now that I'm guessing he has no money. No offence meant but my sisters like to count the cost.

As Mynd pointed out, this whole thing happened to you, so I'll just go straight....LEAVE HER ALONE, SHE'S TAKEN! Look for a single girl/lady to hook up with.

If i'm your so called friend, i will leave the girl and look for another, her keeping an outside relationship because of the gains(money) she gets is enough reason that disqualify her from being the type of sane lady i want. My opinion

op join me and prioritize these phrases;
"get a life"
"head up"
"grow up"

these are my favorite phases in times like Ur predicament

Mynd_44: The first thing is to admit that it happened to you

the loverboy is just confused.
.
@op, dont teach a girl to break someone's heart, when she becomes an expert, she will practice on u.

Exponental:
the loverboy is just confused.
.
@op, dont teach a girl to break someone's heart, when she becomes an expert, she will practice on u.

True

he is a side dude and need not play victim here coz he knew she had someone from the start. Its either he takes and accepts the side bf thing or moves on. No girl in her right mind would dump the first bf ( who did nothing wrong to her) for the second one who knew from start. Your friend must also remember that if she cheated with him , she will cheat on him. Wat goes around comes around

Monicasque: he is a side dude and need not play victim here coz he knew she had someone from the start. Its either he takes and accepts the side bf thing or moves on. No girl in her right mind would dump the first bf ( who did nothing wrong to her) for the second one who knew from start. Your friend must also remember that if she cheated with him , she will cheat on him. Wat goes around comes around

You are wrong. It can happen. Even if the first maintains things, she might start developing stronger feelings for the second dude. It is possible. The key here is to ensure that the second dude has more time to spend and can match her intimate and other needs.

The simple solution however is to move on. The commplexity of the situation defeats the purpose.

Atheist:-D:


You are wrong. It can happen. Even if the first maintains things, she might start developing stronger feelings for the second dude. It is possible. The key here is to ensure that the second dude has more time to spend and can match her intimate and other needs.

The simple solution however is to move on. The commplexity of the situation defeats the purpose.

and how will one feel knowing that he got left overs? again won't he be scared that she will do the same to him? I have done what she is doing but i do not think i would ever accept it if it was done to me. If a guy has a woman i run for my life coz i get scared that even if he would choose me, maybe one day he would do the same to me.

Monicasque:


and how will one feel knowing that he got left overs? again won't he be scared that she will do the same to him? I have done what she is doing but i do not think i would ever accept it if it was done to me. If a guy has a woman i run for my life coz i get scared that even if he would choose me, maybe one day he would do the same to me.

If he loves her he wont care. At least he knew the situation when he met her. She could do the same to him even if he was the first.

So you can dish it but you cant take it... interesting

Atheist:-D:


If he loves her he wont care. At least he knew the situation when he met her. She could do the same to him even if he was the first.

So you can dish it but you cant take it... interesting

yep. I am such a coward aren't i

Monicasque:


yep. I am such a coward aren't i

That isnt cowardice... that is hypocrisy.

Hypocrisy is the state of pretending to have virtues, moral or religious beliefs, principles, etc., that one does not actually have. So you do unto others but would not want the same done to you. If you do it, expect to receive with an open heart

Atheist:-D:


That isnt cowardice... that is hypocrisy.

Hypocrisy is the state of pretending to have virtues, moral or religious beliefs, principles, etc., that one does not actually have. So you do unto others but would not want the same done to you. If you do it, expect to receive with an open heart

well said but m still scared of hurt

Monicasque:


well said but m still scared of hurt

Then why not be fair and dont hurt others. Treat others the way you want to be treated. No cheating etc. keep it simple, straight and fair.

The worst thing in the world is to look at someone you love and see their pain when they find out about your shenanigans and fooling about. If you can do that then you arent a coward... just mean. So trust me, you dont want to be in that situation.

Atheist:-D:




Then why not be fair and dont hurt others. Treat others the way you want to be treated. No cheating etc. keep it simple, straight and fair.

The worst thing in the world is to look at someone you love and see their pain when they find out about your shenanigans and fooling about. If you can do that then you arent a coward... just mean. So trust me, you dont want to be in that situation.

yep

Monicasque:



yep

Sorry to sound harsh but it is what it is

Atheist:-D:




Sorry to sound harsh but it is what it is

no darling. You are right. It is what it is. BLV when i say that hurting someone is the hardest thing one can ever do. Its shamefull and bad. But i still do it. I know that i do, so am not gona pretent to be a good girl when am not. Crucify me for my actions if you will ,and i will still not cope if it were to be done unto me. I already know that its bad so no need to go into it again ( you know what i am talking about)

Monicasque:


no darling. You are right. It is what it is. BLV when i say that hurting someone is the hardest thing one can ever do. Its shamefull and bad. But i still do it. I know that i do, so am not gona pretent to be a good girl when am not. Crucify me for my actions if you will ,and i will still not cope if it were to be done unto me. I already know that its bad so no need to go into it again ( you know what i am talking about)

No one cares about what you do. What we care about is that you can change and you wont? Why wont you change? At least you know it is wrong so that is a start. So where do you go from here? At what point will you decide to change?

Atheist:-D:


No one cares about what you do. What we care about is that you can change and you wont? Why wont you change? At least you know it is wrong so that is a start. So where do you go from here? At what point will you decide to change?

am not going into this again with you Ath. We have already been through it remember? its becoming boring and old news

Monicasque:


am not going into this again with you Ath. We have already been through it remember? its becoming boring and old news

yeah yeah... I know

If I take the time to hassle you over issues it is because I value you. I wouldnt waste my time if I didnt

Atheist:-D:


yeah yeah... I know

If I take the time to hassle you over issues it is because I value you. I wouldnt waste my time if I didnt

wowww thanks Ath. Will talk again later. I gotta run now

Monicasque:



wowww thanks Ath. Will talk again later. I gotta run now

Ok. Take care