Please all nairalandites, I need your sincere advice. I met a young lady during my service year as a corps member whom I fell in love with but she's a secondary school leaver. In fact, she's yet to make all her papers. Since I left the state where I served, my love for this lady has grown beyond what I ever anticipated. But the challenge now is that we are miles apart. To worsen the matter, she's trying to secure admission with the result she has into one of the Federal Universities in the Northern State. My fear is that I don't want to involve myself in a distance relationship because I have heard so much about it but the more I try to let her go, the more her thought comes to my mind. She claims to be a virgin and a born again christian. But I really don't think I can wait up to 4 years before I get married, though she promised to get married to me once she's in her second year in the tatiary institution. Will the wait really worth it in the long run? Please what do I do? Please I wouldn't mind constructive criticism and questioning. (I'm sorry if I had bored you). Thank you.

LOL, you didn't bore us . How old are you and how old is she?

i have one question for u my so called graduate.Are u truly a graduate with this your grammar?

Yield: LOL, you didn't bore us . How old are you and how old is she?

I'm in my late 20's and she's in her early 20's

baba11: i have one question for u my so called graduate.Are u truly a graduate with this your grammar?

Please pardon me for this. Please I still need your opinion. Thanks.

Love does not look at all that,so far as she can express herself well that's all.

be patient otherwise lv her alone. She is yet to see what life has to offer and there you are with your selfishness

Monicasque: be patient otherwise lv her alone. She is yet to see what life has to offer and there you are with your selfishness

please how am I selfish?

kismo:
please how am I selfish?

coz u r impatient

Has she secured the admission yet? It depends on the life-goals of the two of you. If you're both determined to make it, with proper planning and focus, you definitely can. I know of a couple who did same, in this case, the lady was the graduate and the guy a secondary school leaver. But they were both smart enough to know what they want and planned properly for it. It wasn't easy but the guy is now a lawyer, almost done with his masters and doing just fine.

Note: all these happened after they got married.
So, my point: if you're ready to spend the rest of your life with her and you love her enough to go through the rough road, all you need is proper planning and you will both get there. GOOD LUCK!

kismo:
I'm in my late 20's and she's in her early 20's

Okay.

Yes, you can

I'm currently in a relationship like this...and I'm proud of her, all my friends including her bros & sisters were against it in d 1st place thinking I'm gonna use & dump her bt I stood by her, come to think of it she's a fashion designer bt me no care sha. so far she's making u happy and make sure u blend her to ur level like I did, now ppl like us a lot and when u see her u'll think she's a graduate. you still have alot of work to do bro

davades: I'm currently in a relationship like this...and I'm proud of her, all my friends including her bros & sisters were against it in d 1st place thinking I'm gonna use & dump her bt I stood by her, come to think of it she's a fashion designer bt me no care sha. so far she's making u happy and make sure u blend her to ur level like I did, now ppl like us a lot and when u see her u'll think she's a graduate. you still have alot of work to do bro

You sound like a keeper. Good man.

@Alutacontinua, she has not secured the admission yet. I told her to take her time and make her result first so that I can help her get admission in Oyo State, she said no. I would have loved to marry her before she furthers her education but she wants to gain admission first. Thanks
@davades, thanks. I will observe all you've said.

@Alutacontinua, davades, yield, how do I tackle the issue of distance? She's in Benue State while I am in Oyo State.

TRUST AND COMMUNICATION!
Dt's all you need.

Pls.my question is dat. if she end up not gaining addmission, can u stil marr her?

Ugokings4luv: Pls.my question is dat. if she end up not gaining addmission, can u stil marr her?

YES. I even wish she can allow us get married before furthering her education.

alutacontinua: TRUST AND COMMUNICATION!
Dt's all you need.

Alright. Thanks so much.

Then u need 2 convince her by bringing her close 2 ur self

DS is a serious assignment 4 u.
U av to brush her to ur taste,if not wala go de ooo.

Question back to you....if you manage to wait and get married after her graduation...when both of you are graduates...and she goes for Masters and become more qualified than you...what would you do?...ask for divorce? As a graduate you should answer me....I'm waiting.

Originalsly: Question back to you....if you manage to wait and get married after her graduation...when both of you are graduates...and she goes for Masters and become more qualified than you...what would you do?...ask for divorce? As a graduate you should answer me....I'm waiting.

Lol. Well, I never said I will not further my education. My fear is waiting for her to finish and at the end she says she's no more interested.

mko abiola: DS is a serious assignment 4 u.
U av to brush her to ur taste,if not wala go de ooo.

Yes, I have to, though she's not that bad.

Ugokings4luv: Then u need 2 convince her by bringing her close 2 ur self

Okay. Thanks.

Does d girl loves u d way u love her cos lov is suppose to b reciprocated xpecially d type dat wuld lead to marriage so dat u don't end up hving a divorced home nd u said u wuld like to marry her b4 she further,my question here is a u prepared 4 d marriage now as in finance cos d last time I check u said u jst finish serving,so let us know ur ansa

if u really want to marry her,don't wait till she gains admission into the uni,because she might not be yours after that time,just go ahead and marry her and put her in let say part-time programme to further her study.i tink u know beta!

so u were sent to do ur nysc and instead of facing d service, u were just spoiling all my Tiv sisters and ended up falling in love with one abi? bros u no try at all o. u been no c all d corpers and single sisters from makurdi to Gboko?

A degree is overrated in the context of a relationship/marriage, moreso in the Nigerian situation.
It should only be a factor when considering financial contribution(s) to the union.
More important issues like compatibility, orientation, character, attitude should be considered.
There are very many annoyingly close-minded Nigerian gradutes whose disposition might make you question formal education.


My point is: you're quite myopic if you think that being with her long-term should be a function of whether or not she a "graduate". It's probably best if you left her be.

milky doll: Does d girl loves u d way u love her cos lov is suppose to b reciprocated xpecially d type dat wuld lead to marriage so dat u don't end up hving a divorced home nd u said u wuld like to marry her b4 she further,my question here is a u prepared 4 d marriage now as in finance cos d last time I check u said u jst finish serving,so let us know ur ansa

Lol. I have a job now. So finance may really not be a challenge.

baba11: if u really want to marry her,don't wait till she gains admission into the uni,because she might not be yours after that time,just go ahead and marry her and put her in let say part-time programme to further her study.i tink u know beta!

My brother, your guess is as good as mine. This is what I'm trying to avoid. Thanks.