Eze Promoe:
Please don't. I'll be lonely

your derailing check ur gmail.

Y'all Don't Worry. I'll Drop The Next Chapter. Whenever You Guys Are Free, Just Update But Please Make It ASAP. Thanks.

Dygeasy: Y'all Don't Worry. I'll Drop The Next Chapter. Whenever You Guys Are Free, Just Update But Please Make It ASAP. Thanks.

update already!

Laff iyaf want to kill me die. This thread self wan resemble FUJI HOUSE OF COMMOTION. Kudos to you guys. Abeg make all of una keep Flowing jare. *Muah*.

Xyne

Dygeasy:

MrBrownJay, Where You At?

I am here, but since we have to try to follow the storyline then I can only start writing something when the person before me has finish putting their chapter...... Meaning giving us quite a short time to write. Anyways my chapter is on tomorrow, right? (After Mazi)

MRbrownJAY:

I am here, but since we have to try to follow the storyline then I can only start writing something when the person before me has finish putting their chapter...... Meaning giving us quite a short time to write. Anyways my chapter is on tomorrow, right? (After Mazi)

has his bhan hexpiled?

He gafe hup hon hus lemember?

^^^^ok so am i next? its a bit confusing. ok so let me follow up on the last chapter

HumbledbYGrace: has his bhan hexpiled?

He gafe hup hon hus lemember?

If am right, his ban is for 6days starting last week saturday, so we he has 1 more day 2go.

chistar01: If am right, his ban is for 6days starting last week saturday, so we he has 1 more day 2go.

I doubt he will come back.

ok will post the next chapter in a bit.....following on Xynerise post.

This thread should not be allowed to die o

chistar01: If am right, his ban is for 6days starting last week saturday, so we he has 1 more day 2go.

He has been unbanned since Saturday.

MRbrownJAY: ok will post the next chapter in a bit.....following on Xynerise post.

Jay you can update choosing the section your familiar with, just make sure your plot and that of the poster before you don't clash.

Baybe: This thread should not be allowed to die o

I would be damned if it does.

HumbledbYGrace: I would be damned if it does.

*breathes a sigh of relief*

Baybe: *breathes a sigh of relief*

that's my girl.

Mynd_44:
He has been unbanned since Saturday.

oh! Really? Hmm, ok, I stand corrected then. In that case I Guess Mazi is truly out. What a loss.

chistar01: oh! Really? Hmm, ok, I stand corrected then. In that case I Guess Mazi is truly out. What a loss.

actually its his loss

...

lol classic badosky

uj_sizzle: lol classic badosky

mehn I love that lady.

Lmaooooooo! Dy Dy! U b winshhhhhhh... Shyte! U no my moniker in and out. Dude, I tuale!!! Excellent! Carry go! "Nurrin does u".

HumbledbYGrace: mehn I love that lady.

I love u more... But! U dey fuckup sometimes mehn! Repent!


Btwn, ave y'all noticed any chapter with Badosky in it, entertainment is surest. Yep! I WAS BORN TO STAND OUT.

Idowuogbo:
I love u more... But! U dey fuckup sometimes mehn! Repent!


Btwn, ave y'all notices any part with Badosky in it, entertaining is surest. Yep! I WAS BORN TO STAND OUT.

I have dear, I know I messed up big time last week. I am paying for it till now, you have forgiven me right?

On the other side, You are theeee it girl of nairaland.

Dygeasy: CHAPTER 9: STRONG WILLED
She had only walked a few paces when she saw a young beautiful girl struggling with her luggage. She had the South-African flag imprinted on her dress material and on her IDentity Card was written the name Nadia_SA. A young guy too was walking beside her, struggling with his own travel-bags and still helping with hers. He looked fagged out. His own ID card bore the name Dygeasy

"Could you help us with these bags please?" Dygeasy said to Idowuogbo.

"I'm okay with only you abeg." Nadia_SA said.

"But..." Dygeasy started to say.

"Its fine." Idowuogbo said and walked away.

"We're sorry." Dygeasy said at the top of his voice to Idowuogbo who already was ahead meters away...

haha Dy'g u don't forget huuuh..
I Remember during the nl campaigning days nd u asked iDowu to help campaign with u nd I was like "nah I'm ok with u only " lol.. Nice story sha..

Chapter 9 funny oo!!! Badoosky things!!!







Lemme just start from page 1,cos I've been ignoring this thread

why is everyone focused on 190? lol, he is indeed Nairaland favourite poster.........

anyway CHAPTER 11

After sleeping through most of the seminar, 190 and Born2fukc came out of the seminar more clueless about TB than ever before. These two had never been the hard studying type, but only loved the health seminars because so many fine ladies always filled up the place. So, as they were walking out of the place, they turned their "playa mode" on and decided to get down to business. they browsed around at the many ladies in attendance and before they could look any further, a big silhouette stood in front of them.

"Hi boys, i haven't seen you in church lately, have you forgotten the way to redemption?" said the man

B2F hissed then said "abeg Okija Juju comot for here, i can't even get a decent plate of rice and you want me to pay tithe or what not. go ask God to bless me with a better life and then i will be in your church every damn day""

Okija smiled then looked at 190 and asked " is that how you boys want to live your life? repent, come to Jesus and be saved. the path you have chosen is not worthy"

190 then looked on and after a long pose, he turned around and saw two fine ladies coming in their path. he tapped B2F on the side, nod towards the girls, before saying to Okija, while still looking at the girls "listen Okija, i have God on speed dial, even on BBM, so whenever we are ready to join your church, we will let you know"

Okija turned around to look at the girls that they were both staring at, and wanted to talk to the girls but B2F put a hand on Okija's chest to stop him "Bro Okija, these ladies are not part of your higher plan, pls go find some victims elsewhere" and then he put himself in between the ladies and Okija.

Okija tried to say something to the ladies but the boys were already facing the other way, trying to get the attention of the two fine ladies that were now standing in front of them.

"Helllllloooooooooooo ladies" said B2F in a joyful voice.

"wasn't the seminar great?" said 190, as he positioned himself in between the two ladies.

the ladies glanced at Okija gesturing at the back, then looked at 190 and B2F, trying to remember if they had seen them at the seminar, then the girls looked at each other and said in a very uninterested voice "hhmmm yeah……….."

B2F then jumped in "hhmmm yeah?! come on gals, this was a great seminar, we learned so much today. That professor is great and it is important that we focus on our health too. this TB stuff is deadly, and i heard TB Joshua is the only one that has the cure, thats why they call him TB Joshua, ahahahaha".

nobody was laughing, and the gals rolled their eyes ,190 smiled and continued " oh yeah, this was such a nice seminar, I always love to come to such seminars. my brain is just like sponge, i am in heaven. i was writing so much materials that i ran out of paper. did you girls enjoyed it as much as we did?"

"It was ok" said the first girl, "i want to become a doctor, so it's always good to come to such place and learn about health…….by the way, I am Kails but people mostly know me as MsDarkSkin. I was born in kingston Jamaican but was raised in Miami……….and this my girl here is Omolola" while pointing at her friend.

190 took a step towards MrsDarkskin before saying "i was so focused on what the professor had to say that i didn't realise the beauty of some of the women that were attending. Good Lord MrsDarkskin, you look just………. oh sorry, i am 190 and this is my friend Born2FFFF………….."

and before he could finish his sentence, B2F quickly shouted "FINANCE!!!!! Born2Finance is how people call me…….. but you can simply call me B2F"

the girls looked at him and were amused but also puzzled by his name, so B2F explained "yeah, my father is in the oil industry, and sadly i have been known to be too flamboyant with my money. after studying in Cambridge for a few years, i decided to come back to 9ja to find myself a local queen. them oyingbo women don't have what i need, so thats why i am here as an exchange student"

190 saw that the girls became really interested in B2F after his explanation, and not wanting to carry last, he brought his own lies to the table "me, i am called 190 because that's the first car my parents bought me when i turned 16, a Mercedes Benz 190. i crashed that car within a week, and they replaced it with the exact same car 10 days later. the last 190 i bought, i gave it away to my ex girlfriend as a parting gift because i don't believe in long distance r/ship. i came back from New York about 3 months ago, and will also be studying here for about a year, but i am very lonely at my Banana Island Mansion because my parents are away in our holiday home in Switzerland".

these lies were so obvious that it was almost laughable, but sadly it seem to work as the girls seem to believe it, especially Omolola. the girls suddenly became "more friendly" around them, everything these guys now said was funny. so after about 20mins talking at the side of the hall, they decided to meet up later that evening to go and get some food together. They all exchanged numbers, BBM and what not, before they parted ways…….so, 190 and B2F decided to walk back to their hotel.

"Born2Finance?! you couldn't have come up with something better?" said 190 while smiling.

"oh boy, you nearly killed me, and thats the first thing that came to my mind" and then in a sarcastic voice he continued "but don't worry MR Mercedes Benz, tonight we will go and pick the girls up in one of your motor, abi?" they both exploded in laughter.

190 then said in a very serious voice "But bro, let's make it clear right now, MrsDarkskin is mine, so pls don't mess up like last time, and instead stay away from her…….you can have Omolola"

"aaaaaaaah! you are not going to start with your usual nonsense! we know the drill, and let it flow during the evening, then we'll take it from there" said B2F.

190 looked angrily back at him, and in a fatherly voice said "Son, there is a very important rule in life called the RULE OF ENGAGEMENT. it means that
whoever start chatting with a girl, he has authority to jam that girl over anyone else, since he is the first one who engaged her in a discussion. these are the rules son, and although i didn't create them, i certainly follow them. you too must always follow them, failure to do so will result in wahala of highest proportion"

B2F hissed and then nod in acceptance "ok daddy, as you wish" before entering in their room at the hostel.

the place couldn't be as far from the truth as you could imagine. the room of these so called "sons of millionaire" was a D U M P, garbage bags everywhere, clothes littered all over the floor, open draws revealing that they had only a bag of garri left to eat, no fan, no stove, no running water, the smell of toilets running through the place….and to top it all off, they were sharing the room with 3 other guys who were still snoring in perfect melodic synch.

190 and B2F looked at each other, then look at the room before 190 said "bro, there is no way we can bring these two fine ladies back to this room, unless we want to be busted for lying about our situation. we need a serious plan tonight. these gals look special"

in a very confident voice, B2F replied "you worry too much, let's meet the gals and take it from there. how much money you got?"

"one thousand five hundred, and you?" asked 190

"2K, which means more than enough to score tonight…… even if i have to fukc her in the bush at the back of the Uni. i am the all mighty B2F, fucking is the aim, nothing else to gain!"

Meanwhile, the girls had arrived back at their hostels, and as they entered their room, Omolola asked "woah, don't you think B2F is nice? he made me laugh, and i can't wait to meet him again tonight"

MrsDarksin looked back at Omolola, threw a very long hiss, before saying "come on sista, these two broke aasss guys were full of shiiit. you didn't believe any of the lies they were throwing at us, did you?"

Omolola was puzzled "what do you mean?"

"these guys are NOT sons of millionaires, let alone sons of thousandaires. the only thing B2F can ever finance is a bag of garri, and that 190 guy only deserves 190 hot slaps to wake him up from his dreams. Banana Island ko, Coconut island ni! abeg, forget these clowns." furiously said MrsDarksin.

Omolola was shocked at what she was hearing, and couldn't believe for one minute that these guys were not who they claimed to be. "but why would they lie to us like this?"

MrsDarkskin sat on her bed, gestured Omolola to come sit next to her and said "you see, these NU boys will tell you any sweet words that comes to their minds, just to try to get into your pants…..and its okay, so long as they come correct. but sadly, some of them have what we call the "follie des grandeurs", which means instead of coming correct, they come up with all these BS lies that any golddigging gal would fall for. the fact that they thought we were that kind of girls is their loss,we are better than this, and thats why you just have to give these guys fake numbers. you gave them a fake number and BBM, right?"

Omolola kept quiet for a a few seconds before MrsDarksin looked at her, shook her head and said "oh no you didn't?! you gave these ignoramus your REAL number?! girl, which village are you from, and did you just arrive from there?"

"how was i suppose to know!" asked Omolola.

MrsDarskin put her palm on her forehead, and understood that these guys were going to call all evening, and that ultimately they would have to either find a very good excuse, or go out with them. MrsDarksin tried to school Omolola on the "game" and made her understand that a gal never hand over her phone number to strangers like that, unless she is 110% sure that this person is who he claimed to be. she then told her that they were going to do something very special that evening, something so great she (and the boys) will remember it for the rest of her life. she picked up her phone, dialled a number before exiting the room.

ghen ghen MBJ, i tuale for you

(suite)

back at the "millionaires mansion", the boys were happily soaking their last bag of garri. as they finished feasting on their meal, 190 was getting impatient and decided to call the girls to set a meeting time for the evening. B2F told him not to as it was too early and would only show desperation from his part, but 190 wouldn't have any of it and dialled Mrsdarkskin's number.

"the phone is ringing" said 190 in a very excited voice.

"hello" said the male voice at the other side of the phone.

"hi" said a nervous 190 "hhmm is that MrsDarskin?"

"you dey craze?! who is this?" said the guy on the phone.

"sorry sir, i am trying to call the number 080 555 87 34. my friend MrsDarksin gave me this number and told me it was hers" said 190 almost apologetic.

"there is no MrsDarlskin here, this is MY number so pls don't ever call me with this nonsense!" before hanging up the phone.

190 looked at B2F, then told him that he must have written the wrong number down. B2F laughed and said that she must have done a switch on him…….meaning that she must have given him a wrong number, which only proved that B2F should be the one going for MrsDarkskin as she wasn't a fool in the game.. but as usual, 190 would have none of it.

so B2F took his phone and dialled Omolola's number. the phone was ringing and someone picked up. B2F gave a thumb up to 190 before putting on his smoothest voice "hi Omolola, my sweet cucumber, i was just thinking about us…..hhmm i mean you girls, and was wondering at what time we could all meet tonight?"

Omolola laughed then replied "what about 7pm? is that ok with you guys?"

"yes it is perfect, looking forward to see you later" then said a very happy B2F.

"cool, Mrsdarkskin and i can't wait to see you guys again. so 7pm in front of MR Biggs. see you later, bye" and before he could say anything, she hanged up the phone.

B2F sensed that something was TOO right, so he looked at 190 and then said " i don't know what it is but something is fishy here. this Omolola girl was just too nice. you know man, when it is too good to be true?"

"bro, stop tripping, we are two fine guys and these gals can't resist us………... tonight is the night and we are going to have a good time" said a very happy 190, dancing his way to the bathroom, as if Christmas had come early.

B2F put his hand in his pocket, then took out his 1500 Nairas, then slammed it on the table before saying "oh boy, this money will go a long way if we take these girls to some mama put joint, but not MR Biggs. do you know how much a plate of rice cost at Mr Biggs? your garri infested stomach, coupled with the fact that you haven't had sex for a long time is the reason why you don't think right at this moment"

190 tapped his fingers nervously on the side of the bathroom sink, "bro, you are right, Mr Biggs is a dangerous place to bring a girl you have NOT fukced yet. lets call the girls and reschedule because i am not feeling it"………... B2F shook his head in a way to say NO WAY! so 190 continued "the menu at MR Biggs is very dangerous and the way a girl orders food there, shows how she cares about you. you see, if she orders a cheap plate on the menu then it shows she cares about you and your finances. if she orders a not too expensive but not cheap plate on the menu, it means she wants to test your financial abilities without insulting you………..BUT, if she orders the most expensive plate on the menu, it means that she has no respect for you or your hustle, and simply wants a free meal and/or defraud you"

B2F laughed loudly, and while walking to the bathroom he said "NO NO NO, you are mistaking. in my mind the menu looks like this: if she orders the cheapest plate on the menu, then i might not even get a peck on the cheek at the end of the night. if she orders from the not so expensive but not cheap side of the menu, i may get a hand job or maybe b.lowjob BUT, if she orders an expensive plate, then it is a confirmation that we will be fukcing that evening……………. my only problem with Mr Biggs is the price of the food, as we only have 3500Nairas which means we have to order wisely"

so they came up with a plan that if there was any problem during the evening, they would have to say the word GANGAM STYLE, that would be the code word that something was wrong. they both agreed and went to prepare themselves.

as the girls were preparing for the evening, Mrsdarkskin told Omolola to remember what she had told her and to stick to the plan. the girls left their homes and headed to the meeting point. as they arrived, they met our two wannabe playaz already standing by Mr Biggs entrance. they all greeted one another, and before 190 could say anything, MrDarksin said that she didn't think they should eat at Mr Biggs, and instead they should go and eat in another place. 190 and B2F look at each other and had a victorious smile on their faces, like to say they won, thinking that they were now safe. they started walking down the street while chit chatting about anything and everything, and as soon as they got to the first mama put they could see, the boys said "Let's sit here, it looks like a nice place"

but Mrsdarkskin replied in her Jamaican accent "no no, lets walk a little more"…….. yes, her accent was often noticeable as her parents speak to her in patois.

After 5 more mins, B2F said again "oh look girls, lets seat here" as he pointed at the next mama put they came across.

but Omolola then said "hhmmm no, lets walk just a little more"

as they turned around the corner from that place, they miraculously stood right in front of a brand new, freshly opened KFC restaurant. the girls then said in perfect harmony and synch "KFC!!!!!! we love it, lets go and eat there!" while pointing at the KFC restaurant.

190 instantly fell sick to his stomach, and B2F couldn't believe his ears. he knew that KFC was much more expensive than Mr Biggs, and therefore that was a very bad move to go in there. Omolola looked at 190 who was visibly not looking well and asked "whats happening 190, you don't look ok. you were looking great until we arrived here"

"yeah" said 190 " i'm………i'm actually allergic to KFC food!"

Mrsdarkskin smiled then turned around and then replied in a serious tone "are you allergic to chicken?! i mean thats all they have in KFC, come on!"

then B2F tried to turn the situation around by saying "no, we brought a bunch of friends here a few weeks ago and we all fell ill. just being here makes him remember that awful day, i guess", while 190 shook his head in a way to confirm that.

Omolola had never eaten at KFC so she was excited just to be there, and so said "oh guys, lets eat here, i have never tried KFC before and all my friends are raving about it" then she grabbed 190's hands and while softly squeezing it, she whispered in his ear "and don't worry, i will cure you later tonight of any allergic reaction you may have in here"

the eyes of 190 lit up like disco lights and he started walking towards the KFC entrance while saying "ok, let's go!"

as B2F was nervously following them towards the entrance, he turned to Mrsdarkskin before asking her "do you like the song called......." and then in a much louder voice so everyone could hear, he continued "GANGAM STYLE?"

Mrsdarkskin jumped up and down doing the move, while singing "whoppa gangam style……i love it, i love it"

190 was on another emotional planet and was already going inside the restaurant and looking for a table to sit. they all went in, and sat at the nearby table. tension was apparent on the face of B2F who was trying to signal 190 that they were in trouble. normally, you have to go and order your own food at the counter, but funny enough a waitress came to their table and asked what they would like to eat. Mrsdarkskin picked the menu up, looked through it and then said "I am on a diet at the moment, so i won't eat too much today" to the excitement of 190 and B2F. she posed for a few seconds more and then continued "ok, can i have a burger meal, a Zing Kong box, a 12 pieces bucket and a strawberry sundae"

190 and B2F looked at each other almost with tears in their eye and both said in a very low and nervous voice "Gangam style"

the waitress asked "would that be all for you guys?"

and MrsDarksin replied "but are you not going to ask what the others will eat? this was just MY order!"

as she said these words, a single tear came down 190's cheek.

Brownjay u are the bomb.i'm still crying and my stomach is hurting