It's sad but it does happen. The average man is intimidated. The question here is 'successful and financially independent women' so for now let's assume their attitude is fine and they're not arrogant. Some men would STILL be intimidated and that i down to their own silly ego. A woman will do everything and be submissive and supportive but an insecure guy will still poke holes and find issues with her. When it all comes down to it you should just be secure in yourself as a man because when you are you can never be intimidated by anyone be it man or woman.

As long as she still stays humble despite how wealthy or successful she is then we are good to go,and even if she lifts her ego so much,I won't feel bad but what I will do is to hustle tight and become a better man,i feel is when a man is in-secure that he gets angry that is wife or gf is more successful than him

Omo na dey kind woman I long dey search for.any girl?please call dis number kash!

3@nairaland.com:
Omo na dey kind woman I long dey search for.any girl?please call dis number kash!

Who release dis one

sauer:

Hmm...de Beauvoir. I saw that name and a gush of memories came racing by. Hell, did I love reading Sartre & de Beauvoir in school!
Where and how did you get this handle?

So you read Satre and de Beauvoir in school? Did you study philosophy?

Raymondenyi:
Will u shut up n don't write what u know nothing about;
D ladies that achieve such firm n re not mingled with disgusting attitudes! Don't tek timme @ all to get married... It is the once with attitude! Moreover over 98% of them got attitudes, so what do u expect... When stable, they quickly place people they believe re below them! Behave anyhow to them! N always will wanna shw class.. How do u expect such attitudinal being to get mmarried? ( Generally we all know ladies re very greedy n self-centered beings, little 1da, why 2 ladies can't leave in a room 2geda) then imagine d type dat is stable, wat will u expect..,

With d experiences I hv 4rm ladies; I could do things 2x for my male friends, before I consider doing it 1ce for a lady!!!

*wicked set of beings** mtcheeeeeeewww!!!

Hey dude! U are filled with so much hate & bitterness! U honestly need HELP! See a psychologist!

ogugua88: Women who are successful and financially independent intimidate some men for at least a few reasons:

1. They're confident, which can sometimes be interpreted as arrogance.
2. They have their own money and can buy their own things, support themselves, etc.
3. They can make a man feel inferior or inadequate, due to reasons given in point 2.

Men, particularly African men, are raised thinking that they are to be the provider; sole more than likely. Gender stereotyping is still rampant. A woman is to cook and clean; a man is to work. A woman who can do what a man can do renders a man useless.

A lot of men have egos, even if they won't admit it in front of women. In all honesty, however, there are some independent women out there who behave like they have both an egg and sperm. I, personally, think men should be more open to independent women as they've got a lot to offer. They're fierce, bold, and can be your rock in tough times. Meanwhile, independent women should be the go-getters that they are and still be womanly. Make a man feel like the man he is; you don't have to do all and be all because you're successful. No one likes a woman with an attitude, regardless of her wealth, fame, beauty, or whichever assets she may have.

May your brain be blessed! Lol

ogugua88: Women who are successful and financially independent intimidate some men for at least a few reasons:

1. They're confident, which can sometimes be interpreted as arrogance.
2. They have their own money and can buy their own things, support themselves, etc.
3. They can make a man feel inferior or inadequate, due to reasons given in point 2.

Men, particularly African men, are raised thinking that they are to be the provider; sole more than likely. Gender stereotyping is still rampant. A woman is to cook and clean; a man is to work. A woman who can do what a man can do renders a man useless.

A lot of men have egos, even if they won't admit it in front of women. In all honesty, however, there are some independent women out there who behave like they have both an egg and sperm. I, personally, think men should be more open to independent women as they've got a lot to offer. They're fierce, bold, and can be your rock in tough times. Meanwhile, independent women should be the go-getters that they are and still be womanly. Make a man feel like the man he is; you don't have to do all and be all because you're successful. No one likes a woman with an attitude, regardless of her wealth, fame, beauty, or whichever assets she may have.

May your brain be blessed! Lol

De Beauvoir:

So you read Satre and de Beauvoir in school? Did you study philosophy?

No i didn't study philosophy. I studied something miles different. Philosophy just wouldn't leave me alone. Even now.
And u? U study or studied philosophy? And are you one of them independent ladies in question?

sauer:
No i didn't study philosophy. I studied something miles different. Philosophy just wouldn't leave me alone. Even now.
And u? U study or studied philosophy? And are you one of them independent ladies in question?

In which of your school's courses were Satre and Beauvoir mentioned? I didn't study philosophy, I was asking you if you did because the two people you mentioned were philosophers.

Because those kind of Nigerian women are likely to disrespect their husbands who earn less cash than them.
But in civilized countries this is not the case.

nbright: Are you proud?.

If I am it'll be easy to tell from my posts

De Beauvoir:

In which of your school's courses were Satre and Beauvoir mentioned? I didn't study philosophy, I was asking you if you did because the two people you mentioned were philosophers.

They were mentioned in none. I never studied anything related to philosophy in school. I learnt about these philosophers while reading other subjects out of interest. Perhaps you understand; I was never one to stick to classroom topics.

DailyNews:
Being rich doesn't equate to being independent cos majority of the so-called rich single ladies are still dependent on some richer men directly or indirectly...so where is their independence then

Excellent point. This is why I am often disgusted by Nigerian ladies who make a song and dance of their so-called financial independence. More often than not, most of them got there by sleeping with this or that oga,.even though they would deny it to the end. We know them and see them everyday in professional and business circles.

Examples abound everywhere. . .from Nollywood to business to banking and other corporate sectors. Most of them get jobs/promotions/contracts/etc by virtue of their carnal affairs with 'ogas', and then turn around to do shakara for other men and claim to be 'independent' women. Like I remarked in another thread, Naija women's idea of independence is to be dependent on some men in order to appear 'independent' to others. Grand deceit.

A truly self-made woman is quite rare in this country, believe it or not. Parasitic clowns like Folorunsho Alakija are the examples they look up to. Can you compare that leech (who became a Forbes-certified billionaire by sucking IBB's presidential cöck) to truly self-made madams like Oprah Winfrey or Meg Whitman? Jokers.

sauer:
They were mentioned in none. I never studied anything related to philosophy in school. I learnt about these philosophers while reading other subjects out of interest. Perhaps you understand; I was never one to stick to classroom topics.

That's good.
So what did you think about their existentialist philosophies?

Pryme-st*rr:

Score cheap scores with her Like seriously... 2 wat benefit would dt be 2 me if i may ask u?
Mr Johnson... I'm only acting like i v got no tym 2 waste arguing in a faceless forum 4 which der is no benefit for me or my rival., *whom eva dt may be*
I will engage in a bout any day any tym wen der is somtin meaning 2 my gain., whether tangible or otherwise.
#this much should be enough 4 ur comprehension#

;( what a touching speech #nt sarcasm#. whatever floats your boat

tobezekiel: still nt all women. and the ones that do.. ermm, I wont totally blame them. whn a woman is financially independent and too soft she might or will be taken for granted by male opportunist.

whn a man is financially independent and too soft he might or will be taken for granted by female opportunist.

De Beauvoir:

That's good.
So what did you think about their existentialist philosophies?

Wow! Was enthralled by it. I would say these still form some of my core beliefs. In any case, i was probably already brooding existentialist thoughts before i came across these guys.
Read numerous Dostoevsky then as well.

I think these philosophies somehow serve as basis for today's western living. They may have been unusual then cos they were radical. Today, your regular Joe in the western world probably leads an existentialist life. Am not so sure of Nigerians; we are still kinda tied to religion's apron strings, so not much changes. Maybe when we free ourselves of religious fetters we could become more rational about life.

And just to add, I would particularly like to see more Nigerian women become a feminist of the de Beauvoir type, and not of the Hillary Clinton or Sheryl Sandberg type.

And what do you think about their philosophies?

Just Reading thru dis Post, It is obvious that most men behind their bravado facade lies very Insecure beings wit Egos more fragile than EGG...

Chomzy19: Just Reading thru dis Post, It is obvious that most men behind their bravado facade lies very Insecure beings wit Egos more fragile than EGG...

yea men are insecure too in our own way

I have an idea of where you are coming from, believe me I want you to live life to the fullest but am afraid you are just HALF and you need another HALF to live to the fullest! You might have been jilted and hurt BADLY in time past,FORGIVE,START ALL OVER AND LOVE AGAIN! SHALOM!

kulyie: sorry,i already have a baby through artificial insemination which i am already nursing and will obviously continue from where i stopped.being a grandma is still a very lonnnnnngggg lonnnnggg time,who says i wont live life to the fullest.thats why i am at home on maternity leave and can nairaland because good enough someone is helping out with my baby

sauer:
Wow! Was enthralled by it. I would say these still form some of my core beliefs. In any case, i was probably already brooding existentialist thoughts before i came across these guys.
Read numerous Dostoevsky then as well.
I think these philosophies somehow serve as basis for today's western living. They may have been unusual then cos they were radical. Today, your regular Joe in the western world probably leads an existentialist life. Am not so sure of Nigerians; we are still kinda tied to religion's apron strings, so not much changes. Maybe when we free ourselves of religious fetters we could become more rational about life.
And what do you think about their philosophies?

What I think? I agree with a lot of their ideas, I think it is the most fulfilling philosophy humans can live by because it lets people shape themselves into what they want to be and allows them understand and achieve their unlimited potentials.
I think existentialism would only work in a society where there there is a functional system for maintaining law and order and keeping people from harming others so I don't believe Nigeria is ready for existentialism.

sauer: And just to add, I would particularly like to see more Nigerian women become a feminist of the de Beauvoir type, and not of the Hillary Clinton or Sheryl Sandberg type

First of all, it's good to know you support feminism. Secondly, why don't you like the Clinton/Sandberg feminism? Why de Beauvoir?

I'm a man o but true talk.zm.

tobezekiel: still nt all women. and the ones that do.. ermm, I wont totally blame them. whn a woman is financially independent and too soft she might or will be taken for granted by male opportunist.

Jyde81: I'm a man o but true talk.zm.

exactly

Nduxzy: I have an idea of where you are coming from, believe me I want you to live life to the fullest but am afraid you are just HALF and you need another HALF to live to the fullest! You might have been jilted and hurt BADLY in time past,FORGIVE,START ALL OVER AND LOVE AGAIN! SHALOM!

ok

Idowuogbo:
Who release dis one

chaaiiiii idowu you dey fvk up.i don find you taya today since morning.you don miss another gbege.you still dey this dull/dead thread when one drama dey boil for family section.anyway the thing don end,but i call you and e pain me as you miss that thread.you wan try abuse nothing wey them o call the babe.

Anyway the summary of the jist be say one smalee don get bele and before then we don advise her say make she face her books.she go dey lie give her mama so she go fo her boyfriend house,now she don get bele and the boy say make she go comot am or he go deny am fiercely say no be im give am bele.she don dey confused.but the matter don settle sha.e be like say the girl don go abort the thing comot 8-)

wasak:

1. they are not confident, they are arrogant, I may have to say this. there was a time my pops went broke and mom was d 1 feeding d family, she maintained the fact that she was in control and till date she cares to tell whoever is ready to listen (She's a good person but She's still a woman)
there are several other situations I've personally witnessed.
2. No one restricts a lady from buying things for herself, the only problem is when she starts buying for the. man, when she starts feeding the home, I tell u, any man in such a situation will turn houseboy unless he knows how to play his card with women. a man may feed. his wife. for. 10 years without having to mention it to a third party, but if. a woman does Same for a day, all her friends would know!!!
3. it's a general thing for women to Look down on people below. them in social status, the beautiful ones Look down on the less beautiful, the wealthy ones Look down on the average ones, the intelligent ones look down on the less intelligent! y do u think most women want to appear flashy? it's not necessarily to attract men, in most cases they do so to diss their fellow women....
as a man... I know my Bleep.ing onions, once beaten, shy till eternity!!!
if u c a humble woman praise her parents...

Hmmmm! Another perspective to the matter.......I understand the angle u are coming from...

kulyie: 1.Ego will never let me
2.i cannot stand any man telling me what to do,where to go,what to wear,when not to go out,when not to party, who to talk to,who not to talk to,infact,i cant take it.
3.two egoistic people cannot live under the same roof.
4. i cannot give up my independence for nada
5. After studying the regemented lifestyle of many african married women,e.g wake up as early as 4am,tidy the house,cook for mr husband,get the kids ready for school,prepare for work,come back home, take the kids back from school,prepare supper for mr husband,wash etc,i cannot live such a life.i refuse to let circumstances dictate the kind of life i live especially when such sacrificial life might be appreciated or might not even be appreciated
6.mrs wife always comes last in the list of priority in many marriages
7.i dont have to be distracted by any man did this and that nonsense,inlaw craps etc
8.no need hoping,wishing or praying no one cheats etc
9.share my salary with nobody except the people i choose to
10. Live my life for nobody since no one is looking up to me or waiting for me to do this and that for him.

Honestly I doubt u meant all what u've just said. But if u meant it and U're still single, then there is trouble becauser honestly I don't think there is any male out there anywhere who would be able to put up with u....

De Beauvoir:

What I think? I agree with a lot of their ideas, I think it is the most fulfilling philosophy humans can live by because it lets people shape themselves into what they want to be and allows them understand and achieve their unlimited potentials.
I think existentialism would only work in a society where there there is a functional system for maintaining law and order and keeping people from harming others so I don't believe Nigeria is ready for existentialism.

On the contrary, i think Nigeria is indeed ready for existentialism. Okay, i personally don't think one needs to be ready for thoughts that can change one's worldview. These philosophies are just there and anyone or any country can use them to their benefit. Though existentialism may cause one to define ones own values, nowhere does it put one above a country's laws. If anything, it should probably make one more aware of what is right and what is wrong.

I think i had this discussion with some ladies here on NL sometime ago. Yea, am for feminism. What i find a bit deceitful is "womanism", or pretence to feminism, or whatever it is called. I don't know; can't put a thing to it. I just think it's incomplete. These women still believe wholeheartedly in marriage and have not completely divorced themselves from male worship. This, i think, is more or less american. I have always found the European concept of feminism more attractive.

Jyde81: Honestly I doubt u meant all what u've just said. But if u meant it and U're still single, then there is trouble becauser honestly I don't think there is any male out there anywhere who would be able to put up with u....

please this is a settled issue,i have said my own,thank you

dabossman: I think some of these financially successful ladies need to maybe change or broaden their circle of friends.

I noticed a trend recently which sort of formed this opinion. I realized that a number of financially independent ladies who finally got married after waiting almost endlessly, got married to guys they knew from many years before; probably in secondary school or university, or in the neighbourhood they grew up in. These are guys who knew them before they started earning the fat salaries. Guys who know their true person and not some perceived diva status. In some cases, even when the guy is obviously earning less than they are, it didn't pose a problem because the guy knows where they are coming from and appreciates and respects the fact that they've made something positive of their lives over time. The really key in these cases being accessibility because there was an existing relationship.

So maybe these ladies need to get outside of their usual circle of friends who hangout at only the poshest of locations and mingle more with people who are not necessarily in your "social status". Let these people get to know the real you. It won't de-rep you or cheapen you.

This also applies to guys who say there are no good girls out there. There are, you are just not searching in the right crowd.

Really true to a lot of extent

kulyie: 1.Ego will never let me
2.i cannot stand any man telling me what to do,where to go,what to wear,when not to go out,when not to party, who to talk to,who not to talk to,infact,i cant take it.
3.two egoistic people cannot live under the same roof.
4. i cannot give up my independence for nada
5. After studying the regemented lifestyle of many african married women,e.g wake up as early as 4am,tidy the house,cook for mr husband,get the kids ready for school,prepare for work,come back home, take the kids back from school,prepare supper for mr husband,wash etc,i cannot live such a life.i refuse to let circumstances dictate the kind of life i live especially when such sacrificial life might be appreciated or might not even be appreciated
6.mrs wife always comes last in the list of priority in many marriages
7.i dont have to be distracted by any man did this and that nonsense,inlaw craps etc
8.no need hoping,wishing or praying no one cheats etc
9.share my salary with nobody except the people i choose to
10. Live my life for nobody since no one is looking up to me or waiting for me to do this and that for him.

I like you

sauer:
On the contrary, i think Nigeria is indeed ready for existentialism. Okay, i personally don't think one needs to be ready for thoughts that can change one's worldview. These philosophies are just there and anyone or any country can use them to their benefit. Though existentialism may cause one to define ones own values, nowhere does it put one above a country's laws. If anything, it should probably make one more aware of what is right and what is wrong.

I understand where you're coming from but I was thinking, since the individual is the primary concern of existentialists, personal morality and ethics supersede social morality and popular ethics and existentialists agree there are no absolute moral laws.
Infact, existentialism is very much about rejecting the commonly accepted notion of morality or the morality of the masses and following an existential system of laws would be to be inauthentic. So basically morality in this sense is a very subjective thing and what I would consider ethical to myself and others might actually bring them a great deal of harm.
Let me be honest here, I am still trying to understand the complex nature of existential morality
I know that individual responsibility and the need to preserve one's freedom and the freedom of others is greatly stressed in existentialism but then there is the issue of moral subjectivity to consider.......

sauer: I think i had this discussion with some ladies here on NL sometime ago. Yea, am for feminism. What i find a bit deceitful is "womanism", or pretence to feminism, or whatever it is called. I don't know; can't put a thing to it. I just think it's incomplete. These women still believe wholeheartedly in marriage and have not completely divorced themselves from male worship. This, i think, is more or less american. I have always found the European concept of feminism more attractive.

Nigerian women are placed under very great pressure to marry and bear children. A woman is prepared right from her childhood for a life of matrimony and child care, there is barely any other option available for them. The ones who have decided to stay single or unmarried are ridiculed and make to feel less than human (as you can see from the way one of them was treated on this thread) so many women just go with what is accepted as the norm for women mostly because they do not want to face the disrespect/shame that comes with a lifetime of spinsterhood.