Mbanu! They will come when we start having kids

berem: Mbanu! They will come when we start having kids

Wish the marriage survived that long. Just yesterday we read that a 6 days old marriage just collapsed.

brabus:

Wish the marriage survived that long. Just yesterday we read that a 6 days old marriage just collapsed.

6days old marriage? The marriage was never meant to be then. too bad!

For all ladies replying no....I hope u do same When u get to the stage of a mother-inlaw.....cos most ladies always sound bitter when it has to do with the case of a mother inlaw....... same way u treat ur son and his wife is same way ur son's wife will accomodate u, either good Nor bad...no matter what u say Or do , always remember u have Or will have a son and u will be a mother inlaw.

Pls,pple should not make it sound as if mum-inlaws are bad.if the situation warrants that they stay with U,pls accept them and their flaws.
The key thing is for the young couple to prepare their minds and determine to live peacefully with them.
I took my hubbys grandmother not his mum oo but paternal grandmum cos she raised him,she was alone and old cos my hubbys dad which is her only child had died yrs back,my husby had sisters but non of them had space in their homes ,they live in selfcontain apartment while we are blessed with 3bedroom flat all rooms ensuit,we took this decision because she can't wash her clothes anymore,she can't cook forherself ,@times she fall sick and nobody will inform us all these and many other conditions made us take her in.
Although it is not easy but we did our best for over two yrs,until dat day she slept and never woke up .I am so happy I did allow her in cos God had really blessed us ,I remember how she use to pray for us everymorning.
pls young couples,I know It might not be easy but nothing is impossible if u set ur mind to do it.

Its ironic how ladies cry wolf at mother in-laws and welcome theirs with open arms. I'm the last (son) in a family of six. My mum has indicated interest in spending her last days with me. She is my mum i cant abandon her.

lilyT: For all ladies replying no....I hope u do same When u get to the stage of a mother-inlaw.....cos most ladies always sound bitter when it has to do with the case of a mother inlaw....... same way u treat ur son and his wife is same way ur son's wife will accomodate u, either good Nor bad...no matter what u say Or do , always remember u have Or will have a son and u will be a mother inlaw.

KARMA is a naughty b.itch

QweenMercy: Is it ideal for a mother-in-law to move in with a newly married couple??
If NO state ur reasons..
And if YEs also state ur reasons...
Leggo!!!

Most recent cases of mother-in-law poke nosing, witch hunting has made it a delicate issue.

brabus: For those who says NO, there must be reasons.

For me, here's my main reason

I told my wife if she can get along with my mother, she'll easily get along with me. Why? "Because I can never hit my mother!"

huh pls explain dis abeg?

Its really no biggy if MIL moves in with a couple but not when they are newly wedded. The couple themselves haven't adapted to distinct differences first of all as it seems like they are strangers.

The couple should first get to know each as they stay together,understanding is key in their marriage as it helps in the long run.

MIL can always move in with them later on as she could always be of help to them in the immediate future.

QweenMercy: Is it ideal for a mother-in-law to move in with a newly married couple??
If NO state ur reasons..
And if YEs also state ur reasons...
Leggo!!!

Is it ideal to let a rat run free in a room full of cheese

Yomieluv: To do what? Coach the newly couple how to behave? To me,its hell No. Told my fiancee,no family,from my side,or her side is coming to stay with us.new couple needs privacy to bond together,and during that period,Trespasser will be prosecuted.

GBAM

Karleb:

the son you don already marry, abi you no the meaning of MIL?

Dear u wont understand the direction i'm comming from.

It is NOT ideal, the MIL should stay at her own husband's place!
A newly-wedded couple needs alot of privacy in order to enjoy themselves and to learn how to cope, tolerate and live with each other!

She can only come for a visit once in a LONG while, or when it is time for 'omugwo'!

berem: Mbanu! They will come when we start having kids

. When basically all they will do is to take care of you/baby? And not when they will atleast rest and enjoy old age? Then there presence irritates all of you saying "no no no". Hope we know we will be MIL someday? And someone's daughter will call us names too. We have to be carefull what we say or do.

I made a promise to myself that any lady dat will marry me must tolerate all my family members(not extended o but my dad mum and siblings).
Am still a student now. I remember days i will go to my mum , lie for her dat i need money, i can recollect when am 16 years that i fell sick, i cant eat , sleep walk. My family is there for me for a month that am in my sick state, my siblings cared for me.
Now let come to think of it, if i get married and i have a problem mayb finacially or health( which will neva happen IJN). My wife can leave me, but no matter what my mum will be dere for me.
Not dat my mum will come nd live with me wen i get married( cos she has her own hom) but if she wish so be it.

DocAdray: She can only come for a visit once in a LONG while, or when it is time for 'omugwo'!

. Hope u will be ready to visit ur once 'loved son' once in a long while? Simply because he is married. MILs today were once DILs.

After 6 months of my marriage I moved back to my parents house with my wife and we have been living in peace and harmony,the way Nigerians portrays mother in law is bad we tend to see them as devils advocate.in my own case we are linving like one big family.

Whatever happened to where she lived previously?

My ma always used to say 'uto ka nma na mbiaru' , no matter how nice the said MIL might be, omo leave am...

Indolence, idleness, sloth....killing Nigeria since 1960. What will make a grown woman leave her work, profession, business, venture, dream, aspiration, vision, passion and go sit down in another man's house. That's why poverty and depravity will never leave us. Where do we get these nonsense culture anyway. When the couple goes off to work, what will she be doing....watching telly. We are so, so messed up in this country.

That singular act has broken so many marriages. Capital no, make she stay with her husband.

corridor: After 6 months of my marriage I moved back to my parents house with my wife and we have been living in peace and harmony,the way Nigerians portrays mother in law is bad we tend to see them as devils advocate.in my own case we are linving like one big family.

My brother you are lucky to have such a nice family but look your keyboard in the eyes and type your reply to this post saying "there's not been a complaint from either party in those 6 months"

QweenMercy: Is it ideal for a mother-in-law to move in with a newly married couple??
If NO state ur reasons..
And if YEs also state ur reasons...
Leggo!!!

And do what when she gets there?! I thought we have all gotten over this.
Well, I think the couple needs their space and she's not necessary needed (no offence) till 'omugwo' otherwise, she only comes if my house is a spacious mansion and her house is on fire so I say a big NO!

Timothy3113: I made a promise to myself that any lady dat will marry me must tolerate all my family members(not extended o but my dad mum and siblings).
Am still a student now. I remember days i will go to my mum , lie for her dat i need money, i can recollect when am 16 years that i fell sick, i cant eat , sleep walk. My family is there for me for a month that am in my sick state, my siblings cared for me.
Now let come to think of it, if i get married and i have a problem mayb finacially or health( which will neva happen IJN). My wife can leave me, but no matter what my mum will be dere for me.
Not dat my mum will come nd live with me wen i get married( cos she has her own hom) but if she wish so be it.

you still a small boy so you can't understand.
you only spoke of your mum, what about your mother inlaw? would you be happy if she. packs her bag and come live with you guys for say 6 months?

lilyT: For all ladies replying no....I hope u do same When u get to the stage of a mother-inlaw.....cos most ladies always sound bitter when it has to do with the case of a mother inlaw....... same way u treat ur son and his wife is same way ur son's wife will accomodate u, either good Nor bad...no matter what u say Or do , always remember u have Or will have a son and u will be a mother inlaw.

If any lady says its not right for her MIL to come at all,then that lady is wicked.

My own is that over familiarity breeds contempt as I've come to realize by serious experience, she's allowed to visit and stay some months, change base, come again etc cos believe me, if she packs her kaya and comes to live with a newly wed permanently, hmm there's a very high change of noticing things no one noticed before(on both sides) even if my own mum were alive, I wouldn't let her live with me permanently except in a case where she's really aged and needs constant care and attention(same for my MIL).

As I am now, I can't go putting up in someone else's house permanently, its just not advisable, we are humans and its in our nature to be territorial.

Reference: Indolence, idleness, sloth....killing Nigeria since 1960. What will make a grown woman leave her work, profession, business, venture, dream, aspiration, vision, passion and go sit down in another man's house. That's why poverty and depravity will never leave us. Where do we get these nonsense culture anyway. When the couple goes off to work, what will she be doing....watching telly. We are so, so messed up in this country.

. Don't sit there and type rubbish . You don't know what the future holds for you. My father inlaw is a Dr but he was bed ridden for years I had to bring him to stay with me and I still let him express himself. Without him maybe I won't have a husband. And I espect my children to do same. Do you think you will forever remain young?

He was sick/ invalid that's a different case.

smileandlove: . Don't sit there and type rubbish . You don't know what the future holds for you. My father inlaw is a Dr but he was bed ridden for years I had to bring him to stay with me and I still let him express himself. Without him maybe I won't have a husband. And I espect my children to do same. Do you think you will forever remain young?

smileandlove: . Don't sit there and type rubbish . You don't know what the future holds for you. My father inlaw is a Dr but he was bed ridden for years I had to bring him to stay with me and I still let him express himself. Without him maybe I won't have a husband. And I espect my children to do same to

And think well before you post. I know the context in which the poster is speaking so don't use extreme examples. A bedridden fellow will not exact a dynamic psychological toll on a host family but a live, kicking person who comes to your home to do 'nothing' is not a positive influence at all. I have sympathy for the former not the later at all. Go to many homes and you find people just hanging around simply because they are comfortable and heavily subsidised so they find nothing else to do. Most of these relationships exact heavy tolls on marraiges and often end negatively so don't bring the ill person example here, they are in the minority.

And the part of your father in-law expressing himself means what. Explain.

[quote
author=smileandlove]. Hope u will be ready to visit ur once 'loved son'
once in a long while? Simply because he is married. MILs today were
once DILs.[/quote]



Even the bible said, 'a man will leave his father and mother and shall CLEAVE to his wife, and they shall become ONE FLESH!'

It depends on the situation of things, if your husband has been the one taking care of her mother