...But wait oo! †ђξ guy earns 120k monthly, †ђξ babe works 2 . Who says dey can't START a family on dat? Dey must be extravagant spenders. Dnt we have male teachers and govt workers who do not earn upto dat and have families? Some bank workers, telecom workers earn 60-80k and r married with kid(s)! †ђξ guy is not just ready or just does not wanna marry †ђξ babe or dey just have spending problems. Dey just have τ̲̅ȍ plan well and with time, more blessings and open doors will come

Samyj247:

A big amen o, nd same to u o. I no se no guy go like any kpekus we b like big hole

big hole? E better make man die leave this world than make he dey frustrated with his madam pusiiiiwey be like lagos-ibadan express way.

mencade5: if na you i no go label u evil woman. But i have been seeing u in my dreams. Are u the special one?

Lol
Dreams
What was i doing?
Treating ur mental self
Or chasing you with a cutlass?

[quote author=franzis]I’d feel like I just wasted four years of my life if this is not heading anywhere

Girl: So…
Guy: So…
Girl: I need for us to have this conversation
Guy: What conversation?
Girl: We’ve been together for four years
Guy: Yea?
Girl: And I need to know where this is heading to
Guy: Oh boy!
Girl: Listen baby, it is only fair to define this. Four years of my life is a lot to ask for
Guy: What do you mean?
Girl: I’d feel like I just wasted four years of my life if this is not heading anywhere
Guy: Babe, it’s a relationship… not a death sentence.
Girl: You don’t get it, do you?
Guy: Make me get it
Girl: It is time to define US. Where are we heading to?
Guy: We…we are in a relationship. It’s a destination. Isn’t that enough?
Girl: So where is the next bus-stop?
Guy: Every day we stop and pick up new ways of loving each other…that’s how it works.
Girl: So when do we get to the bus-stop where you propose to me? Or aren’t we going to get engaged?
Guy: …
Girl: Baby, say something!
Guy: I earn N120k… I am not ready for marriage.
Girl: I didn’t say marriage, I said engagement.
Guy: What’s the difference? One is supposed to lead to the other, right?
Girl: Baby, I have to wear an engagement ring just for the satisfaction of knowing that this is leading somewhere
Guy: For how long? Another four years? So you can finally brand me a monster for tying you down for eight years?
Girl: Do you plan to tie me down for that long?
Guy: I don’t know, babe. I just know that I’ve seen too many f%&ked up situations and I am in no hurry to get engaged or married or any of that.
Girl: So are we f%&ked up?
Guy: No…but…look at Francis and his wife…they quarrel like drunk cats! Guy earns barely above what I earn and he already has two kids. The minute you get married the kids start popping out like popcorn. It’s shitty. It doesn’t interest me at all.
Girl: Wait, let me understand what you are saying… Are you saying marriage is shitty, and you have no interest in having kids?
Guy: No, not right now. I’m not interested. I can’t afford that lifestyle on my salary.
Girl: Then dream bigger, aim higher…’cos I’m tired of waiting!
Guy: Then don’t wait. You don’t have shackles on your feet.
Girl: WHAT?!
Guy: Babe, see…I love you, but I’m not going to promise what I can’t afford to give. If you can understand that then we can continue loving each other, if not then it’s fine. I understand.
Girl: I can’t believe you!
Guy: Wh…what do you want me to do?
Girl: The right thing!
Guy: But this is the right thing. I’m not going to lie to you nah!
Girl: So four years just go by like that and I’m supposed to just walk away?
Guy: Don’t walk. Stay with me.
Girl: Until when?
Guy: Until…what do you mean, “until when?” Isn’t this a relationship?
Girl: That is heading nowhere!
Guy: Ok…ok! So it seems we have very different views about this, ‘cos if you ask me I’ll tell you that this is fulfilling in itself, and it is enough for me- just having you in my life and sharing it together.
Girl: I will never forgive you if you don’t do the right thing. And God will judge you.
Guy: Oh boy! What are you on about?
Girl: If you think you can just use me and dump me…
Guy: Use you?! How? We are dating! How is that “using” in anyway?
Girl: And I’m supposed to just stay in a relationship that has no plans to evolve?
Guy: I thought we were evolving just fine. Loving, sharing, learning…
Girl: This is bullshit! And karma will get you for this!
Guy: Babe, I didn’t f%&k you without your permission. Everything we did, we did because we wanted to. And if we break up now, it will be because we stopped wanting the same things. Our needs changed. Mine is still straight, but you want other things I can’t give; so how does that make me a bad guy?
Girl: Is this a plan to marry someone else? Piss me off and then go get a new chick, abi?
Guy: You are not listening…you never listen. I am presenting to you a simple case: I do not have the money to buy you an engagement ring…I don’t have money to pay LindaIkeji to cover our “surprise engagement” that we’d have at The Galleria, with your palm over your mouth feigning surprise and acting like you didn’t tie my balls to do it. I do not have money to entertain your friends and family…and I, sure as hell, do not have the money to plan a wedding, or move you into my small apartment. And I will not have kids popping out from every hole in your body just so I can tick all of society’s boxes. I don’t have the money…and guess what, I don’t have any interest in doing all of that.
Girl: So why did you date me?
Guy: Gosh! Are you serious?!
Girl: Answer me, damn it!
Guy: I dated you because we liked each other! Heck, you showed as much interest as I did… you attacked me like a tigress on our first night. I didn’t force you to cook, clean…you did it willingly just as much as I did all I did freely. Why are you now making it seem like we had an agreement four years ago that I am reluctant to fulfil?
Girl: I am a woman, and you let my biological clock tick away like that!
Guy: Aaaaargh! What do you want from me?
Girl: Ok…what if I settle everything? I work too and I can buy the engagement ring for myself and pay for a photographer to capture the moment. It will be on a yacht not at The Galleria…I’ll pay BellaNaija to put it up. All you need to do is slip it into my finger. For the wedding, I’ve been saving for four years. I have enough to cover my dress, the cake, the hall, the food, MC and photographer… you can take care of your suit and the Deejay.
Guy: Wow! What can I say? Are you sure you are not on some cheap meds?
Girl: Excuse me?!

Girl: Really?!
Guy: Yes, really.
Girl: You evil man! I stayed with you, nursed you when you were ill…bought you the best gifts four years in a roll for your birthday…sucked you, kissed you, loved you like you were the last man on earth…
Guy: I sucked you too; ate you well like you were the sweetest cake in the store; bought you nice gifts; travelled with you; heard you cry, laugh… helped you get better at your job…supported you when you feared you had breast cancer. I did what a boyfriend should do. So what’s your point?
Girl: Shut up! You devil!
Guy: *sighs* Babe, I can’t give you what you want. I’m just not ready for it. I’m sorry.
Girl: I gave you the best years of my life.
Guy: And I gave you the best of what I could afford. Cut the pity party, abeg. You are the one asking for more, you are the one who’s unfair. So why blame me? You are the one ending the relationship; I’m just trying to be sincere.
Girl: God will shame you! I will get married before the end of this year.
Guy: Oho! So you’ve been cheating on me?
Girl: I never cheated, but God sees my heart and He will give me my heart desire and shame my enemies.
Guy: So you’ll be getting married to a stranger then?
Girl: Love happens in mysterious ways!
Guy: Good. Send me an invite.

You are lucky the girl does not have bad friends, she would have poisoned you. Fear a woman who is so much in love.

rahymat: If a guy doesnt propose to u in four years tym u beta leave him because its difficult to bear a child if ure more than 30years old.

How can a reasonable girl date a guy more than two years without any future plan from the guy. I think the girl was getting more from the relationship hence, why she waited for so long.

First the engagement ring then then the wedding ring n next suffe[b]ring[/b] then they turnto lords of the ring......this is a style for those that rush into marriage.....abegi marraige is a destination to death. Y start it on time....i wanna enjoy ma singlehood[not in immoralities sha] ...to me, the guy n gal are both correct in their respective ways.... but they re more like unmarried couple[cos they re already doing wat marries pple do].....

mencade5: big hole? E better make man die leave this world than make he dey frustrated with his madam pusiiiiwey be like lagos-ibadan express way.

Do you know you are corrupting me ?

DuchessLily: ...But wait oo! †ђξ guy earns 120k monthly, †ђξ babe works 2 . Who says dey can't START a family on dat? Dey must be extravagant spenders. Dnt we have male teachers and govt workers who do not earn upto dat and have families? Some bank workers, telecom workers earn 60-80k and r married with kid(s)! †ђξ guy is not just ready or just does not wanna marry †ђξ babe or dey just have spending problems. Dey just have τ̲̅ȍ plan well and with time, umore blessings and open doors will come

You got right my Sis. Some people don't get that. Some couple,s combined salaries are not even upto 60k, are there not some poor people who are happily married, deos succesful marriage based on money? If both as husband and wife plan themself very well with common vision, surely God will provide for them. The word "Provision" is two words combined. Ie: Providing for Vision. If they have vision, the resources are there. The issue is the guy was just using her to satisfy his sexual urge and she was blindfolded by the word "Relationship", if that guy sees even a very wretched girl he likes he will be ready for marriage in the next hour.120k per month? That guy must be a prodigal son(Ofeogiri ) if he have no savings.

The guy simply don't want to marry the girl.

This sort of problem and worse will persist if you continue to sleep around in the name of dating or silly relationships that were ingrained in your mentalities by those who are hellbent on destroying family values. It's a pity when morality and values are been inculcated, it's tagged brainwashed and dogmatic, but when it's depravity at it's nadir you hear rational and all sorts of ostensibly affirmative words to qualify it. This is probably one of the myriad of reasons why the world reached the consensus that the black folks are gullible and inferior and hence should be slaves, which is what I call harrowing veracity.

silversonuc:
isaiah 4 vs 1 wuld give a clearer picture

Lol! But this na only one oh!

bukatyne: @OP:

The girl is very desperate and is not putting on her thinking cap. She made it seem that she wanted marriage and not the b/f. She also is very vain (Imagine 'we will get engaged on a yatch etc.') and want to be a Mrs. by force(I have saved for the wedding ceremony; I will buy the ring etc.) She also didnot understand what her b/f was saying, was not logical and engaging him on an emotional level. She also waited for 4yrs before talking marriage. She didnot even know the guy's vision: I want to start earning N300K before we marry; I want us to marry in 3yrs time etc.

The guy is very insensitive and does not love the girl to me. Infact, he didnot sound like he was interested in marrying her in the first place. Must bella naija and Linda Ikeji cover their engagement? How small is his apartment that they cannot begin from there? Must their wedding be the talk of the town? Is it his proposed kids that he is refering to as 'popcorn'? Don't people have a family on smaller income? Afterall, the girl claims to have savings; why can't he tell her to start a business? How long did he plan to string the girl? He is also very unyielding: the babe was trying to meet him halfway (even though she was desperate & senseless about it) but the guy was taking my way/the highway stance.

They should break up and go their seperate ways

read her 6th comment, that might explain d guys disposition.

Basically agree wit ur observations tho

DuchessLily: ...But wait oo! †ђξ guy earns 120k monthly, †ђξ babe works 2 . Who says dey can't START a family on dat? Dey must be extravagant spenders. Dnt we have male teachers and govt workers who do not earn upto dat and have families? Some bank workers, telecom workers earn 60-80k and r married with kid(s)! †ђξ guy is not just ready or just does not wanna marry †ђξ babe or dey just have spending problems. Dey just have τ̲̅ȍ plan well and with time, more blessings and open doors will come

agreed.... if he earns dat arnd S/W (xcluding some part of lag) den he can start a family.... bt he may be sensing insecurity of d job and may b staying arnd the most xpensive part of lagos or abj.......

macof:

What rubbish is this you call 4yrs relationship rushing My ancestors didn't spend a month in relationships
If a man knows he don't want marriage, he should not get a woman in a relationship with him
Stay and hustle till you ready, not bring the girl to your door when you not planning on opening it to let her it

Haba, don't get all sentimental on another person's mess.

Unsure of what part of the world your ancestors are from, but I know that courtship was fostered by previous generations.

Through relationships, people evolve and get to know eachother better. There is nothing wrong in going into a relationship if you mutually accept your present state of affairs. Getting married requires more efforts and is not a measure of time.

It is better to seemingly waste 4 years of your life learning the intrigues of relating with a future partner and take such lessons learned to a better relationship, than a lifetime of misery. For this couple, their bane may not be physical attraction but lack of financial wherewithal.

realborn:

Haba, don't get all sentimental on another person's mess.

Unsure of what part of the world your ancestors are from, but I know that courtship was fostered by previous generations.

Through relationships, people evolve and get to know eachother better. There is nothing wrong in going into a relationship if you mutually accept your present state of affairs. Getting married requires more efforts and is not a measure of time.

It is better to seemingly waste 4 years of your life learning the intrigues of relating with a future partner and take such lessons learned to a better relationship, than a lifetime of misery. For this couple, their bane may not be physical attraction but lack of financial wherewithal.

Hear! hear! hear!

2scorehigh:

I guess you didn't see or hear her telling him to dream bigger, huh!

Women?! Hmm, u neva jam!

If u no take your time, Dem fit push you over the cliff!

But that's not my business!

I read the phrase clearly. She should wait until his dreams materialize if she believes in him!

I never new that,immaturity is also a disease until i read this.4 years?will u continue ur job,if u were not paid 4 only 4 moths?she is not cheating on u and she will surely marry b4 the end of this year,bet me.she will never 4giv and God will really punish u.my people say that"eme osiso eme haru odachi"

DuchessLily: ...But wait oo! †ђξ guy earns 120k monthly, †ђξ babe works 2 . Who says dey can't START a family on dat? Dey must be extravagant spenders. Dnt we have male teachers and govt workers who do not earn upto dat and have families? Some bank workers, telecom workers earn 60-80k and r married with kid(s)! †ђξ guy is not just ready or just does not wanna marry †ђξ babe or dey just have spending problems. Dey just have τ̲̅ȍ plan well and with time, more blessings and open doors will come

it got me wondering if all d pple dat r married earn may b from 200k n above. So happy to c dis. That guy is jst not serious, dats all.

Gurl z Too Jumpy....Guy Iz Being Truthful....Buh 4yrs witawt an Engagement Ring...Z Kinda weird...this Case Tho

Oh! God dis thing apuned to me last week sunday... We barely reach one year when we broke up but one part of me have refused to let her go.. I am still fighting like a mad man to get her back... I love her but.....

sewiously 4years is a long term thing...i see the guy as the hardnut there but i dont have to judge a little cos the guy was straight on the ensued.
Reason best known to the guy....

I think all ladies should just stick to the policy of no sexx b4 marriage nd the guys to should minimize cash investment...at least no one will feel cheated nd used...cos I don't get why both parties who are meant to be adult enjoy dem selves for a period of time whether sexxually or financial or any other means of enjoyment..now when priorities of either party becomes different nd the other which could be the lady or the guy says no...u start hearing curses nd insult...me I don't like it oooo....all this pity party all these ladies start as if the dude ddnt contribute his body too....they make it look like the sexx is a gift which is probably their only contribution to the relationship most of the time....abeggiiiii

juanmiguel: it got me wondering if all d pple dat r married earn may b from 200k n above. So happy to c dis. That guy is jst not serious, dats all.

N120k and contributions from the wife can grow a family. Is the lady ready to accept the low key lifestyle their combined income can afford? The constraint is that the guy knows he has a 'wanna be' girl friend. It is evident in her request to stage manage the engagement process with fanfare which her man cannot afford.

My first engagement ring to my wife, 5 years after we started dating was bought at N1000. She wore it until it faded. 3 years after, I bought her the best engagement ring ever; we got married the year after and her rings were directly procured from Italy. Today, we may not have the world, but she spends her vacation in any part of the world she desires.

She paid her dues and stayed with me for 9 years when I had only a freaking pair of leather slippers and overstarched/oversized shirts. When things got tough after the wedding she stayed through and supported all the way with every penny of hers. Now life is better, she definitely has to enjoy and shall continue to enjoy.

guys always define ur move b4 u start the so called relationship...

babe i am planning to get married until am 35yrs which is 10yrs from now so while we are dating (if u re still interested sha) if u see another bobo dat wants to marry u abeg go oooo, follow am ooo.

simple as A B C

Damn# Bi@*hes always wanna tie down a Nigg*. . . Dude just don't wanna get married period!!! Let him be!

The same guy refusing to marry after four years will accuse Rochas for not performing in four years

rahymat: If a guy doesnt propose to u in four years tym u beta leave him because its difficult to bear a child if ure more than 30years old.

Taaaaaa! Stop peddling falsehood......it's only common in their mid-50s and above

This is actually my experience.....almost five years and guy talks and reasons exactly like d guy here. He wants us 2 continue d relationship but wt no commitment. Says he's not ready financially yet he works in a multinational company nd earns beta dan whr he was last year(@ least his excuse last year was he cudnt make a family wt d kinda job he was doing dn). Dis year d excuse too is, he's nt ready financially nd also psychologically. Can't continue 2 write abt d relationshp. We actually once (if nt more dan once)had a conversation like dis nd his responses were just identical 2 dis guy's. In fact, d diff is d use of words bt dey av d same implication. Men!!!

femmefatale: This is actually my experience.....almost five years and guy talks and reasons exactly like d guy here. He wants us 2 continue d relationship but wt no commitment. Says he's not ready financially yet he works in a multinational company nd earns beta dan whr he was last year(@ least his excuse last year was he cudnt make a family wt d kinda job he was doing dn). Dis year d excuse too is, he's nt ready financially nd also psychologically. Can't continue 2 write abt d relationshp. We actually once (if nt more dan once)had a conversation like dis nd his responses were just identical 2 dis guy's. In fact, d diff is d use of words bt dey av d same implication. Men!!!

You need to stop asking him his plans for you believe what he has told you. Have plans for yourself.

mencade5: big hole? E better make man die leave this world than make he dey frustrated with his madam pusiiiiwey be like lagos-ibadan express way.

Hahahaha, no b lie, dat express way eh, even if catapillar enter am, e no go size am. Nd d mumu girl go se d man no fit satisfy her.

femmefatale: This is actually my experience.....almost five years and guy talks and reasons exactly like d guy here. He wants us 2 continue d relationship but wt no commitment. Says he's not ready financially yet he works in a multinational company nd earns beta dan whr he was last year(@ least his excuse last year was he cudnt make a family wt d kinda job he was doing dn). Dis year d excuse too is, he's nt ready financially nd also psychologically. Can't continue 2 write abt d relationshp. We actually once (if nt more dan once)had a conversation like dis nd his responses were just identical 2 dis guy's. In fact, d diff is d use of words bt dey av d same implication. Men!!!

De there make pant de wear u. I want to ask u a question!!! Have u ever opened ur kpekus for his bomb to enter? If yes, then u are the cause of that. Una fish brain no go ever get sense for once.

The guy has a hiding agenda, four yrs together with the girl and he still like playing to the gallery

[quote author=Keneking]1. Mistakes human make in life , the guy is not ready and you are forcing him.
2. There is supposed to be a relationship before marriage. That is given. Whether fours years or eight years, it is immaterial.
3. The man is sincere based on this story.
4. A typical African would want to be pregnant thereby forcing the guy to embark on a sojourn he was not prepared for.
5. Francis part is really funny...imagine how the innocent ones are being framed
6. What can #120,000 do in the economy of today. Even ordinary attachment it can not buy. The salary is poor maybe pay rent, food and transport without savings etc.
7. By the way, she is not working...meaning that she has to suck the man die.

In short Jona's four years in power is not favoring relationships. Have you noticed that most men are no longer marrying again?
And he wants another four years.Haba. I feel for this lady seriously.

Jona nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
[/te]