aisha2:

When people decide the acts like idiots they loose the right to determine how the other person responds.
Any woman who hits a man has lost the right to determine what he says or does in response to her actions.
Who hits first is the aggressor. If two men fight the question the judge will ask is who threw the first punch and not who hit harder

Hmm. Who hits first. Israel v Hamas, US in the Arab world things.

I can't understand why society treats female on male violence with a softer hand. This is western discrimination against men and it cuts across different aspects of family life. Why this disparity?

Some women feel is Ok to be abusive or violent towards a man but woe betides the man if he dares to respond.

This inequality needs to be addressed, women cant pull out the gender card when convenient & with the same mouth, advocate gender equality, it's hypocrisy.

I for one treat anybody who directs violence my way as an enemy combatant, I've got very limited tolerance for physical violence, don't touch me & I won't touch you.

I pray never to meet women like these because I honestly don't know what il do and I don't want to find out.

@op here is the link to the video of this topic http://9gag.tv/p/a50PwO/when-the-man-assaults-his-girlfriend-everyone-genders-are-reversed-will-shock?ref=jfs

singing in Fela's voice:
I no be gentleman
i no be gentleman at all
I be Africa man, Original
I no be gentleman at all ooo.

You dey go your way the jeje way
somebody come bring original trouble
you no talk u no fight
you talk sey you be gentleman
You go suffer, you go tire, you go quensh............

Yeah, i agree. It's inappropriate to hit a lady even if you're first hit especially as they are generally weak but they're annoying sometimes and you just can't help it but retaliate. Sometimes their cup just gets full. I just can't stand a woman challenging me annoyingly and persistently. They just need to be taught some lesson at times.

I am pretty surprised at the poster's flawed argument, Did she actually say that Rice was defending himself I laugh in Spanish at the word defend

In case the poster is not aware, the guy that hit her is an American Football Player!!!! These guys are pretty tough and lifts weights everyday as part of their training. The guy probably outweighs her by at least 60 pounds and would definitely beat up a regular joe easy. Rice hitting her is akin to Baptista or The Rock hitting their spouse! Hence the guy has ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE.

That said I am definitely not implying that his wife was right to hit him but for heaven's sake he is a football player for crying out loud! There is something called self control and what if she had died? He could have easily restrained her without slapping her. I was once slapped by a female friend but instead of retaliating I walked away. That is what a REAL man does! A real man knows that he can easily brutalize a woman because he is physically stronger and that is why he is restrained

That said, this goes for both men and women alike, if your partner is abusive simply end the relationship. No be by force!

Eleventh commandment: Give hit to whom hit is due!

aisha2: A few months ago I did a post on the Jay Z Solange elevator scandal, unfortunately the tsunami wiped it off.

Now with the Ray Rice issue the issue of double standards is glaring.

A woman attacks a man, he fights back and he is the criminal. Same thing would have happened to Jay Z if he hit back.

Women should not go around hitting men because they have the weaker se-x card same way men should not go around hitting women adults should handle conflicts like adults.

If anyone behaves like a thug man or woman then they have brought on themselves treatelment reserves for thugs.
If a woman feels slapping or hitting a man is the way to resolve conflicts then they should also expect slaps back.

I don't buy the smaller hands argument,abuse is more emotional than physical hitting is hitting.

All of a sudden everyone is awake and condemning this even president Obama but I didn't hear his voice when solange hit Jay Z.

We can't win the war against gender based violence if the wat is tilted to one side. Till we balance the standards and show clearly that man or woman no one has the right to go hitting another we won't win.
Violence has no gender, no gender has monopoly of being abuser or victim. Stop violence against person's let there be a universal standard for all.

unfortunately in the western countries, feminists no go let us hear word. I don't know what is so difficult in asking that no human being should hit another human being. feminists would insist that no man should hit a woman.
believe me the attack of solange on Jay Z was terrible, all i heard was "what must Jay Z have done to this poor little girl"
only whoopi Goldberg stood up to condemn her. and she was booed. again she has condemned women hitting men. she says and i paraphrase, if a woman strikes a man first, she should not be surprised if the man strikes back. . anyway, as long as the society encourages women to hit men, domestic violence will NEVER end.
a little personal observation. . . . i've noticed that women dont hit men who have a history of beating women. women try to focus on gentlemen. i bet no amount of feminism or feminist advice will make that lady hit her husband again.
but this mr rice self, you no even slap am na punch you go hammer am for face. . . .
oga na wa for you o

MizMyColi:
Even in anger, moderation is key.

Are you refering to the man, woman or both.

"What is good for the goose, is good for the ugandan". Sam loko efe(2008)

Women should understand.. A man is a man.. He has the divine right to be egostitical.. When a "woman" slaps a man, she doesnt only slap him, she slaps his ego too..

And dat is one of things a man would not take from a woman .. i trust naija men sha..

The day a woman trys that ish wit me.. She would personally put space between her name and her surname and add another name 'sorry' in between them. (There is more than 1 way to suffer a woman than beating her... By the time you dont eat her food for a week and patronise iya calabar's hospitality instead, nobody go tell am to do the needful)

Wonder why women just feel because we allow dem to talk to us anyhow most times, they can also spit and swing their hand at us..

If you know you like swinging your hand as a woman on a man, why not you join/enrol into the table-tennis or lawn tennis squad?

WURBBISH!!

*Sipping my cold fresh palmwine with hot 'fresh from the grill' asun in hand*

.

Not maried but I don't know what will make me hit a woman. I saw that video on CNN and if that girl love herself she should divorce that man immediately cause it's only a question of ''when'' not ''if'' before he hit her again. A man who will hit a woman once will always do it again sooner or later. I have 4 sisters and I have never hit any of them. Women look so vulnerable to me unless I'm living in a different world.

epospiky: Yeah, i agree. It's inappropriate to hit a lady even if you're first hit especially as they are generally weak but they're annoying sometimes and you just can't help it but retaliate. Sometimes their cup just gets full. I just can't stand a woman challenging me annoyingly and persistently. They just need to be taught some lesson at times.

you are right.

Danhumprey: By the way,which girl won't trip for this guy,not minding whether he is an abuser?


Pictures below is Ray Rice.

Number 1 person that would not trip for him is me
Number 2 is also me
Number 3 is me again....What kind of muscles are those abeg

Chillisauce: Double standards indeed.
The same set of people shouting don't hit first will be same folks hitting on their kids, housemaid etc.

If you condone the Mr Rice hitting back then you are as good as supporting violence.

When a violence is done, using violence to solve it makes it a circle.
When you are hit, it's better you move away from the situation than hitting back.

Get away from the source of problem esp humans than eradicating it.

Lol at self defense, you call that knockout blow self defense?

So why didn't she 'walk away' when he offended her first. Why hit or will you deny that she 'hit'. Ladies and the spirit of entitlement. Never ever considering the consequences. We can say what we want, act how we please, wear what we like and even eat the fruit of knowlege of good and evil. Who's God to challenge that.

aisha2: A few months ago I did a post on the Jay Z Solange elevator scandal, unfortunately the tsunami wiped it off.

Now with the Ray Rice issue the issue of double standards is glaring.

A woman attacks a man, he fights back and he is the criminal. Same thing would have happened to Jay Z if he hit back.

Women should not go around hitting men because they have the weaker se-x card same way men should not go around hitting women adults should handle conflicts like adults.

If anyone behaves like a thug man or woman then they have brought on themselves treatelment reserves for thugs.
If a woman feels slapping or hitting a man is the way to resolve conflicts then they should also expect slaps back.

I don't buy the smaller hands argument,abuse is more emotional than physical hitting is hitting.

All of a sudden everyone is awake and condemning this even president Obama but I didn't hear his voice when solange hit Jay Z.

We can't win the war against gender based violence if the wat is tilted to one side. Till we balance the standards and show clearly that man or woman no one has the right to go hitting another we won't win.
Violence has no gender, no gender has monopoly of being abuser or victim. Stop violence against person's let there
be a universal standard for all.

blank:

But he hit her first.

This is crazy! Are people watching the same video here? Do people think the club and its lawyers are that stupid to just revoke the guys contract without trying to understand exactly what went down there?

the video clearly shows that the guys was the aggressor and the attack was pre-meditated which makes the case very serious but might have mis-calculated or forgotten that there are also cameras in the lift. If one watches the video carefully you will see the following:

1. The guy pacing obviously pisssed-off waiting for the female to arrive
2. He intentionally chose to hide from the foyer camera by standing next to the pillar
3. When the lady arrived, he got into her face in threatening manner and could be seen saying something (might be insulting her or provoking her from her response with her hand, but barely touches him). He might even had touched her because we cannot see his two hands when he was shoving his face on the woman.
3. When coming out of hiding in the view of the camera he acts normal and gets into the lift.
4. He is obviously still pisssed they exchange words and the lady responds by reopening the lift door so he could get off but he attacks her
5. The lady tries to retaliate but he knocks her out.
6. He tried hiding his actsoon as he realised people are going to come in.Well, how he dragged the lady still showed he was still angry than sorry.

Now, where the he'll are some people seeing a vicious attack from the lady? She barely touched him outside and that was response to his threatening in your face verbal assault.

I think people see the guys brown part of the cap and mistake it to be the girl attacking the guy first in the lift and that is not so.

This fvcken guy deserved the punishment because he tried to play the system and was caught.

Floodgater: i also wonder too. When they know that a woman's hit can never be compared to a man's. Yes we all know she did wrong. I dont know if it has been considered that women has natural fear thus tend to know where to draw the line esp. With loved ones unlike a man who would beat as though he is beating a fellow man. Is it to proove to men that they are gender unbias that they will come back and tell men it is ok to beat their women if she hit first after telling them it is a no no to beating women. If you look at the other thread you will see women started applauding Ray Rice when men where against his act before the men started following suit. I am still wondering if they can still confidently say it was ok to hit back had the woman died.

What if the man died too. What will you say.

Reference:

What if the man died too. What will you say.

So far, I haven't seen a case of a woman beating a man to death.

Op, although I understand your point of view but in this case you are dead wrong.

Secondly, if men decide to use self defence in a case where a women is not armed women would be an endangered species in the near future. Can a woman's fist render a man unconscious? Or put him in a coma?

Lets be realistic when trying to find the balance. The reason there are laws against women abuse (physical)in particular, the laws had been backed by science, physiology etc that men have a more chance to harm, disabilitate or even kill a women if the two are engaged in a physical fight.

What will you tell your older son if his younger brother hits him first? Would you say "defend yourself " against your baby brother? Knock him out ( unconscious)
because you have a right to defend yourself?

It takes a lot of principle not to hit back wen u are hit.MY EXPERIENCE: duing my schl days,I had a big quarrel with my girl n I accused her of cheating. I had evidence but it wasn't enuf to hv cursed her. She slapped me 2 times becos of anger but I didn't hit back. At the end she started crying n begging me to hit her bak becos she deserves to be beating ,that was why she hit me.I still didn't. She ended up begging and asking for forgiveness.silence could be a form of revenge but it takes a high virtue n self discipline.it could be a strong tool.if JayZ didn't reply back,the woman shld hv been facing the law alone

Seun: We appreciate your support but we're much stronger and far more prone to acts of violence. Focus on your fellow women; they need you more.

Well said!

Op, at the risk of sounding personal, I want to submit that you are taking the issue of Ray Rice and Domestic violence from a rather myopic view and my fear us that you are passing off this view as being an encompassing one.
You need to note that domestic violence does not start from the physical violence that is apparent to third parties. it starts with verbal and emotional violence. What you termed as Rice's spouce hitting Mr. Rice, was the result of her frustrations at repeated verbal and emotional violence from Ray Rice and it could also be a desperate attempt at crying out for help.
The ease at which Ray Rice retaliated, shows that he has an anger issue and had been violating that lady prior to the incident captured on CCTV. A professional football player, or any man against a woman, even if provoked, is a mismatch no matter how one looks at it. That is the standard. Nothing double about it!

Dygeasy: Could you please log on to www.dictionary.com and fish out the most demeaning and insulting words? Quote me on a thread and qualify me with them.

Would I then say "Zeb04 stop it. Just stop it."? I think not. I'd rather retaliate in like manner with even heavier vocabs which in accordance to human instincts is my own DEFENSE.

The only other option is not responding which isn't defense.

Bro you dey make sense but that slippers wey you wear for your profile pix no make sense at all. Bravo to you all the same

aisha2: A few months ago I did a post on the Jay Z Solange elevator scandal, unfortunately the tsunami wiped it off.

Now with the Ray Rice issue the issue of double standards is glaring.

A woman attacks a man, he fights back and he is the criminal. Same thing would have happened to Jay Z if he hit back.

Women should not go around hitting men because they have the weaker se-x card same way men should not go around hitting women adults should handle conflicts like adults.

If anyone behaves like a thug man or woman then they have brought on themselves treatelment reserves for thugs.
If a woman feels slapping or hitting a man is the way to resolve conflicts then they should also expect slaps back.

I don't buy the smaller hands argument,abuse is more emotional than physical hitting is hitting.

All of a sudden everyone is awake and condemning this even president Obama but I didn't hear his voice when solange hit Jay Z.

We can't win the war against gender based violence if the wat is tilted to one side. Till we balance the standards and show clearly that man or woman no one has the right to go hitting another we won't win.
Violence has no gender, no gender has monopoly of being abuser or victim. Stop violence against person's let there be a universal standard for all.

I am a woman and I agree with you 100%
Any woman that is woman enough to spit and hit a man should be woman enough to collect whatever she gets in return
Violence should not not be tolerated or excused on the basis of gender
Period!

cococandy:

Which is why I think we should all stop disturbing ourselves over the issue

Its never really about an individual but women at large. People forget that thousands of women have died nd left their kids orphaned due to domestic violence. He should have waited and gave her that good punch when they get home and leave it her to report or not, unfortunately once it is in the public domain committed especially by a public figure it is no longer up to her.

If she waits to stay then she also has skewed view about life or even is a second generation domestic abuse product.

I quite understand the emotions and reservations but need i add that there is a hit from a woman that is not meant to harm or hurt. It is an emotional hit. Only humane and loving guys can decode that kind of hit (hit not slap). Take for instance a guy says something hurtful to her woman, and it hurts her so bad that she cries and hits u thrice on the shoulder of back, screaming "why do u derive joy hurting me"? Mehn!! would you take that as a hit and go back at her? I would never do that. my point is, it is not all hit from a girl means fight or invitation for a fisticuff or brawl. I would be the last man standing on earth to touch my woman. So, let us not generalize a hit from a woman. Some hits are affectionate. I know such hits and they are also emotional to me cus it gives me a sense that i have hurt her badly....

Jayne2014: We women want equal rights but can't take equal lefts. She shouldn't have hit him first.

The ability of a man to restrain himself in a violent situation with the opposite sex is what makes him a man. To be a man is not a day job.
That knocked out punch was not cool no matter what.

armyofone: The ability of a man to restrain himself in a violent situation with the opposite sex is what makes him a man. To be a man is not a day job.
That knocked out punch was not cool no matter what.

To restrain himself in the face of physical assault?
We are not talking of verbal only
You wey dey military,trained to uphold moral and ethical standards suppose no dey talk this kain thing na
Will you say the same if it was the other way round?

do to others what u want them to do back to you, its in the scriptures
“So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets. (ESV) matt 7:12

Seriously, that guy no try, cos that chick no really hit am with force. She just hit am as woman dey hit, assuming say she hit with seriousness or she used a weapon e for different, but the guy really used his manly strength on her. Not too good sha. Dunno what I woulda done in his position sha

BluIvy:
Secondly, if men decide to use self defence in a case where a women is not armed women would be an endangered species in the near future. Can a woman's fist render a man unconscious? Or put him in a coma?

So, why are you all looking for "equality" when you know this?