cc150615:


Well I need to answer you cause I'm really baffled at ur line of judgement...so you're concluding dt this girl is like this cos she's from a broken home..I'm sure if she was a spoilt Senator's daughter spoiling u with money nd had ds same xtics u won't complain o...And are u trying to say dr are no people from 'together' homes who can't do house chores I tell u dr are a gazillion of dem so you just can't tie her not been homely to being from a broken home.


But seriously this thread has made me really know how shallow a lotta ppl think...offcos I'm not saying broken homes can't have psychological or emotional effects on kids..but wat of kids dt have used the negative situation to develop themselves nd made them even better ppl....my point is u can't just meet a lady,get attracted to her for a while nd immediately u find out she's from a broken home..u just take to ur heels,anybody u say u wanna marry u take ur time to know the person nd know if she has the values u think are good enough for raising ur future kids nd base ur decision on dt...neverquit said it all there are a gazillion 'together homes' specially in ds 21st century dt are not healthy nd the kids grow up even worse than those from broken homes so don't let broken or not broken homes be ur criteria else u might just miss ur missing rib..know ur woman's character nd let God lead you...
With this imma gerarahere cos some comments are really amazing me dt ppl in the 21st century can still think like dt. Top of the morning to Y'all.

how do you know a person if you are not in a relationship with him or her

That's not a solid point up there

Q

yehmi01:
The answer to this question does not really lie on the broken home fact.

Lots of issues can make a person to be emotionally unstable.

I know of homes that are not broken but the father drinks and smoke and it robbed off on the kids as well, so will you also ask to know if that's a factor for marrying them.

Before I got married my wife told me her mum asked all this questions, weather my parents were still together and weather my father married more than 1 woman.

As a matter of fact some mother will rather marry dir daughter to a guy from a broken home than a home where the father marries more than 1 woman because its believed that such home is built around strife and constant fights.

Really I will not say you select any one as a reason or excuse not to marry an individual.

Get to meet the person and if you guys know you are compactable and you allow God be the Head of the House then I see no reason why you guys won't be fine.

What about guys/men from broken homes? Should ladies consider them for marriage?.........just asking

Am from a broken home and it didn't change my perception about marriage,infact my marriage is in TOTAL PEACE because I was thought how to deal with marital issues peacefully






PLS HIT the like button if your from a broken home,an amazing WIFE and a super MUM!

Sparkles003:
kini big deal.
not her fault the separated or divorced.
they are even the best to get married to especially the spiritually grounded ones they give all to their married so as no to be labeled
like daughter like mother or father

Ur right

Timbuktou:
It's a risky proposition. Most children from broken homes haven't been taught how to keep a relationship or home together and make one work; and most of them never bother to learn. E no dey hard dem to divorce at the slightest marital inconvenience or check out emotionally. They are usually biased against the estranged parent and the parent's gender due to one-sided accounts from custodial parents.

Anybody intending to marry a product of a broken home would do well to ensure due diligence in determining their marriage ideals and conflict resolution beliefs and methods.

My brother you are realistic in your post, lots of other posters above you are assuming and that is dangerous.
They say, the taste of the pudding is in eating until you encounter one of such broken ones in a real relationship, you have no how messed up they (especially some of the girls) can be.
I am a testifyer, my marriage to one of such ended after 5yrs. She moved out after instigating a family row that engulfed her. She was warned to pick issues with her in-laws (who were not bordering her) but her hatred for her dad and her dad's family is too deeply engraved in her heart. She didnt know how to show love or receive love, she was not willing to learn anything beyond what she felt she knew even what she knew were mostly assumptions and based on her mother's view of things.
She look for opportunities to flame her hate by targeting anybody she doesn't like.
Before those ladies here who are quick to defend their likes starts to pick issues with me or accuse me of what they assume I did ( because as far as they are concerned men are always the breaker of homes) not even my ex can point a finger of accusation to me that I cheated. She knew very well that I could not cheat hence, she taught she had me pocketed and she could cause trouble between me and my siblings in other to isolate me.
My advice to any guy who is in relationship with such girls , you had better find out her relationship with her dad incase she was raised by her mum. A girl raised by her dad is more likely to respect men than those raised her mum. Do not assume anything, such messed up girls cover up their flaws till you are committed.

ronald4lif:
Why not and what's the problem with divorcee women?

Not really a Divorcee but children from that home.

Edipee:
Heaven knows that when I'm in love, nothing can stop me. I hate that divorced crap. Does it mean someone from a broken home will definitely want his/ her marriage to break? No, I don't believe that. These people have passed through emotional setbacks and challenges they would not want their children to experience. I have seen divorced couples whose parents are still living together.

like I said before, depending on the mental state of that WOMAN.

If a woman form a BROKEN home is been train by the father side, you will see that she have no problem at all but when she been train by the mother's side that's when you will know that this world rotate backward.

Unless the mother is on a really cool level headed WOMAN.


THERE IS THIS SAYING: A FEMALE CHILD LOVES HER FATHER MORE THAN HER MOTHER WHILE A MALE CHILD LOVES HIS MOTHER MORE THAN HIS FATHER

Just passing by...... Well done house.

Progress2468:


You did that against all odds, not saying people should not marry others from broken homes beside there are many others things to conside b4 marriage, but fact remains that it's a risky venture which b4 anybody takes, it has to be worth it.

good morning marriage itself na risky venture na imagine de rate @ which pple divorce now all am saying is u shldnt define a lady from her parents mistake have a nice day

Edipee:
Heaven knows that when I'm in love, nothing can stop me. I hate that divorced crap. Does it mean someone from a broken home will definitely want his/ her marriage to break? No, I don't believe that. These people have passed through emotional setbacks and challenges they would not want their children to experience. I have seen divorced couples whose parents are still living together.

thank you my brother, I have a friend thats even divorced and to think I'm even older than her as young as I am, Her parent are still together. I also have a friend too, her Father once advised her to leave her husband's house if she feels she cant cope with his nagging, her parent her not separated o.

DeRay98:


My brother you are realistic in your post, lots of other posters above you are assuming and that is dangerous.
They say, the taste of the pudding is in eating until you encounter one of such broken ones in a real relationship, you have no how messed up they (especially some of the girls) can be.
I am a testifyer, my marriage to one of such ended after 5yrs. She moved out after instigating a family row that engulfed her. She was warned to pick issues with her in-laws (who were not bordering her) but her hatred for her dad and her dad's family is too deeply engraved in her heart. She didnt know how to show love or receive love, she was not willing to learn anything beyond what she felt she knew even what she knew were mostly assumptions and based on her mother's view of things.
She look for opportunities to flame her hate by targeting anybody she doesn't like.
Before those ladies here who are quick to defend their likes starts to pick issues with me or accuse me of what they assume I did ( because as far as they are concerned men are always the breaker of homes) not even my ex can point a finger of accusation to me that I cheated. She knew very well that I could not cheat hence, she taught she had me pocketed and she could cause trouble between me and my siblings in other to isolate me.
My advice to any guy who is in relationship with such girls , you had better find out her relationship with her dad incase she was raised by her mum. A girl raised by her dad is more likely to respect men than those raised her mum. Do not assume anything, such messed up girls cover up their flaws till you are committed.

ur ost made sense until u used de word messed up that's not a good word 2 describe someone stay Handsome

sonofananimal1:
how do you know a person if you are not in a relationship with him or her

That's not a solid point up there

I'll ask u a few questions:
Do u have female friends?
Do u know their character?
Are u in a relationship with all of dem?

If you answered no to number 1, did u ever go to school? Do u have ladies in your class? Do u know the characters of any of dem? Were u in a relationship with dem??

Moral: it's also not a solid point to say u can't know someone's character without being in a relationship with dem dts why there's sth like friendship...wen I saw ur siggy I wanted to bash you but i was consoled wen I saw ur handle/monicker..perfect explanation

cc150615:

I'll ask u a few questions:
Do u have female friends?
Do u know their character?
Are u in a relationship with all of dem?

If you answered no to number 1, did u ever go to school? Do u have ladies in your class? Do u know the characters of any of dem? Were u in a relationship with dem??

Moral: it's also not a solid point to say u can't know someone's character without being in a relationship with dem dts why there's sth like friendship...wen I saw ur siggy I wanted to bash you but i was consoled wen I saw ur handle/monicker..perfect explanation

by there words you shall know them.

Grow up WOMAN!!

arabianights:



NO ! DEPENDS ON THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF SURROUNDING THE SEPERATION.

Circumstances? What kind of circumstances?

IF THE LADY GROWS UP WITH HER MOTHER===PLS AVUID HER A BIT==BUT IF SHE GROWS WITH HER FATHER IS GOOD----DO YOUR BEST TO FIND OUT WHY THEY SEPERATE---DONT LIMIT YOUR INVESTIGATION TO ONE SIDE, TALK YO THE 2 SIDES.

sonofananimal1:
by there words you shall know them.

Grow up WOMAN!!

If there's anybody dt needs to grow up,its you boy...I'm outta here,i don't spend precious time in banter with kids

Shymm3x:


He's right though. Most women broken homes are somewhat problematic due to the lack of father figure in their lives, whilst growing up. It's a mental thing and once they get with a guy - they automatically expect him to provide what's lacking.

I don't know how to explain it...but you have to be with one to know how messed up they're.

You are right

ejeh121:
Am from a broken home and it didn't change my perception about marriage,infact my marriage is in TOTAL PEACE because I was thought how to deal with marital issues peacefully






PLS HIT the like button if your from a broken home,an amazing WIFE and a super MUM!

let me ask you a question,

Where you raise by your mom or your dad?

[quote author=Shymm3x post=38329091]

I'm good, sis...and you?

Lmao @ how many people from broken families do I know and have I met.

Well, I know gazillion of them and I'd say I know gazillion of them. Heck, most of the folks I grew up with were from broken homes and if you know how the black family is out here, you'd know that there are more people from broken homes than folks who had their mums and dads in their lives.

Anyway, I agreed with him cos I've been with chics from broken homes and the emotional baggage that comes with them, is just too much pressure.

And you also have the nonsense their mums must have subconsciously instilled in them over time about men cos of their dads. So they always deal with guys based on the image they have in their heads about men. That's just the reality. So you know a gazillion of them and they are all the same?
You should just say you don't want to be girls from homes with issues.
Some of you come here and be acting like know it all. Do you know what really went down? And FYI most women actually never bad mouth the men, the men do so for and by themselves by their actions. So please stop acting like an authority and just stop at NO. As not every girl whose father was AWOL have baggage majority have their heads screwed on right and have been married for ages without problems in their marriages. Plus the question is a biased one!yes it should include men too. After all some guys where brought by just their dad or mum

Shymm3x:


I'm good, sis...and you?

Lmao @ how many people from broken families do I know and have I met.

Well, I know gazillion of them and I'd say I know gazillion of them. Heck, most of the folks I grew up with were from broken homes and if you know how the black family is out here, you'd know that there are more people from broken homes than folks who had their
mums and dads in their lives.

Anyway, I agreed with him cos I've been with chics from broken homes and the emotional baggage that comes with them, is just too much pressure.

And you also have the nonsense their mums must have subconsciously instilled in them over time about men cos of their dads. So they always deal with guys based
on the image they have in their heads about men. That's just the reality.

You are very right....

@op, if your home breaks tomorrow...God forbid... Will you allow your daughter go through discrimination of this kind ?

ejeh121:
Am from a broken home and it didn't change my perception about marriage,infact my marriage is in TOTAL PEACE because I was thought how to deal with marital issues peacefully






PLS HIT the like button if your from a broken home,an amazing WIFE and a super MUM!

Thank God for you because, you were taught right but many girls are never taught or they are taught wrong and they carry on to mess their own marriages up.

Very good advice but I believe it is not in all cases. Sometimes the mother (if she's an honest person) will know "the things she would have done to correct certain problems she had in her marriage" she doesn't advice you from what she did but from what she did not do. My parents are divorced and what I have learned from their experience is to be very careful before choosing a partner. My parents are fantastic people, My Dad is a really loving and nice guy my mom is a really strong and caring person but unfortunately they were not compatible and they tried to make it work for more than 10 years but it wasn't just working. She wasn't happy, he wasn't happy and I was always in tears. Today when I see them they are all smiles and it makes me happy that both of them are happy. So now when the time comes, I wont just jump into a relationship like I see many girls do, apart from looking out for what I love so much about the guy, I look out for what I hate also and ask myself "if peradventure this guy doesn't change, can I live with him for the rest of my life?, is this attitude something I can tolerate and love him whole heatedly anyway?" I have learned that many times what breaks a marriage are the things you saw but choose to ignore from the beginning. The person will not change, he/she will only showcase more of those attitudes when trials and temptation come. A girl will see a guy that beats up his sister, and his Exes and convince herself that he will never beat her; that they annoyed him that's why he beat them. She will go ahead and marry because of "love" and maybe "money" and one day she will annoy him too and...... I have seen divorced bitter people, I have seen divorced happy people, I have seen bitter married people, I have seen people who are married but are divorced in the real sense and I have seen (few) happily married people and i have decided not only to get (and remain) married but to be happily married and if this must come to pass then I must
1) choose wisely
2) decide to make it work even in times of conflict. Even compatible couples have conflict but it is easier to resolve conflict with someone you are compatible with than with someone who views life differently from you.
3) work on my flaws and those things the other party doesn't like so I don't keep hurting him
4) submit. A woman's place in marriage is to submit (submission is not slavery). two heads cannot be on one body, that body will automatically become a monster. That is why it is important to marry a man that loves you. When a man loves you, he doesn't take your submission for granted and when a woman submits and doesn't disrespect her husbands authority, he loves her even more.
My fingers hurt now from much typing

OkoAnike:
Sorry, I tot you are talking about marrying a divorcee....
The only advice my father gave me when I wanted to get married is, don't marry a woman that the mother is not under her fathers roof, marriage has it's ups and down the first person they will run to is their mother, then what advice will she give... The advice that can not keep her in her husband's house.

If u can watch this film u will understand the roles, advice & the position of a mother in marriage, SHORT BRAVE FILM... U can down load it and watch.

[quote author=sonofananimal1 post=38355974]like I said before, depending on the mental state of that WOMAN.

If a woman form a BROKEN home is been train by the father side, you will see that she have no problem at all but when she been train by the mother's side that's when you will know that this world rotate backward.

Unless the mother is on a really cool level headed WOMAN.


THERE IS THIS SAYING: A FEMALE CHILD LOVES HER FATHER MORE THAN HER MOTHER WHILE A MALE CHILD LOVES HIS MOTHER MORE THAN HIS FATHER
Hog wash bag of crap! I know and have seen people who were brought by their fathers alone and do not have an iota of respect for any one so please it's a fifty - fifty thing.
It just depends on how matured the parent is! And am sorry I am not one of those people who believes in daddy's girl bull! I am my parents girl yes and Infact I will choose my mum any day after all if I had waited for my father may be I will be selling tomatoes some where. So stop knocking women accord respect for assuming the roles that the so called men abdicated, I am glad to have been brought up by my mum's family yes ooooo!
Today, I am an orphan no papa no mama. It's my mum's family that has been taking care of my siblings and I. My papa family still dey sleep and I wish them well

queebeediva:
I don't agree one bit because I have seen a lot of children from broken home who have become most important citizens and due to their upbringing they are expose quickly to the reality of life and they no how to cope well. furthermore, children from a broken home are industrious because they no what it takes to be alive . Children from a complete home can only be complete if the both parent are complete so it all depend on the child.

I wish I could give u a zillion likes.

[quote author=affyongehi post=38356898][/quote]you never do learn. And this thread is for you to understand and make things better in the future.

[quote author=gbengus17 post=38356231]IF THE LADY GROWS UP WITH HER MOTHER===PLS AVUID HER A BIT==BUT IF SHE GROWS WITH HER FATHER IS GOOD----DO YOUR BEST TO FIND OUT WHY THEY SEPERATE---DONT LIMIT YOUR INVESTIGATION TO ONE SIDE, TALK YO THE 2 SIDES
Really? I am very sorry for you! It shows you are a male and a chauvinist ( check the the dictionary if you don't know the meaning) your words show how shallow you are!
What a pity and a grave one too

Why not except u are asking if a guy can marry from a family where madness, SS, barrenness etc runs in d family

VenusBetty:
useless as my Dad? common, that's not true, seriously I feel bad seeing a negative comment about these people that have gone through a lot while growing up. Girls that have been able to keep themselves even more than those ones that grew up with their father and mother.

In as much as I don't do pity parties cos this is life and we've all been through the wire (hard times), I'm not mocking no one and what I posited has nothing to do with negativity about a group of people - just reality.

The onus is on mums to start raising their daughters right, without transferring their own bitterness to them. You will find out that even in cases where the mums were at fault - perhaps by being miserable/bad wives or serial cheaters - they will still feed the kids with nonsense about their dads, while painting themselves as slaves. And the first image of a man every girl always pick is that of her dad - and she's going to carry the residual effects for a lifetime, while judging innocent guys based on that baggage.

Let me use myself as an example: though I think most women are arseholes and a pain the arse with their emotional outbursts...but every time I think about nan and mum, that feeling evaporates, and the allure of womanhood takes over my body and soul. That's why I love women and I believe they should be treated with utmost respect (in person), until they give a reason not to. Now imagine someone who has a terrible image of her dad in her head...that is some type of chic you don't want to deal with loool.

A big YES to that.

Wot did d bible said abt it?
Once married, always married. No going bak, no mata wot comes dia way. Rom. 7v2,3; 1Cor. 7v10,11. Mtth 22v29
So, d answer is NO!
Make sure u read and comfirm b4 u wil reply. Dn't 4get!

VenusBetty:
Your mum told you bad things about men, thank God you didn't take that into your brain, I am from a broken home too but I really appreciate my mum, She never said anything bad about my Dad, She's a teacher and i have to say there are some mums that will also do same. So coming from a broken home should not be the problem of the children, you think they like that fact. Reading all these comments totally broke my heart cuz its just called discrimination. Is this really what people think about us?

Well I didn't frame up d story. Its very real. I almost ran out of home when I was young. Some children who she tried to adopt as househelp then, they ran away. There was a year I stayed away from home in a family friend's house and threatened her that I was with my dad since she won't change and she started threatening my dad to expect war. My dad said I shd let her know wherever I am to avoid complications and I did.

The fact is I don't even have the intention of going to my dad cuz his wife who is my mum's rival will not be happy to have me live with them. You certainly know how women feel when another child from outside is coming in..she could even poison me and I'm d only child 4 my mum. If I leave my mum now it won't be good although she once said its not necessary that her child buries her, that she can live without a child. Yet she was feeling jealous when I threatened to go to dad. Even d family friends that harboured me 4 that year are now her enemies cuz they hid her child from her..so she thinks. Apart from the psychological effects of coping in marriage sef, tell me which girl or lady would want to have such as a mother-in-law. A woman whose facial look alone isn't receptive yet a church addict. Well that's where I find myself and I can't fight God for giving me such a parent.

So my dear, some men have even gone thru more than these, that's why it seem some of them aren't loving or romantic. So its gud to know why God brought you into ur spouses' life and stop expecting the societal standard from him/her just cuz u see ur friend's spouse do same. Life is in stages and men are in sizes. We're all diff from each other and ur role as a husband/wife is unique to u alone. When u see someone who loves so much, its bcus he/she has been well loved too. No one can give what he/she does not have.