Guys, here is a hypothetical question for you……,

If you see a married friend of yours about to make a stupid mistake with a chick – do you call him out? Let’s say you’re really good friends with his wife, Godfather to his kids etc. There are no issues in the marriage, it is just a stupid drunken situation and you can see your boy is about to cross the line.

Would you look the other way?
Would you take him aside and tell him to chill?
Would you get the chick away?
Or would you pat him on the back and say go on my son?

I ask because as a woman I wanted to step into such a situation recently and my husband told me to back off, that its none of my business. I’m really tormenting myself about it. I know his wife well and the guy was well out of line. 

what is my business?

instead i will encourage him and support him. Everything is different now since sex is so cheap and everywhere, he has to make mistakes to learn from such mistakes. Ladies know that men are married but they still go ahead to date them.

HELL NO. i have seen to many times couple turn on each other for thing bigger than cheating and then reconcile. i dont want to be in between people 's business. if an adult friend of mine decides/thinks that, his life would be better if he had some toto on the side then i have absolutely no say in the matter. i might advise him that his marriage might be in jeopardy but since he is surely an adult, he must already know about that.
TO EACH THEIR OWN!!!

now if he is going to commit a crime then YES i might stop that fool and bitch slap him back to reality!

go and receive d female insult of: y are u interferng in my affairs wont u mind ur f***kn business.

i wont, ooooooooooooo, will jst look sideways, waka pass jare, wetin concern agboro with overload

mrsb:

Guys, here is a hypothetical question for you……,

If you see a married friend of yours about to make a stupid mistake with a chick – do you call him out? Let’s say you’re really good friends with his wife, Godfather to his kids etc. There are no issues in the marriage, it is just a stupid drunken situation and you can see your boy is about to cross the line.

Would you look the other way?
Would you take him aside and tell him to chill?
Would you get the chick away?
Or would you pat him on the back and say go on my son?

I ask because as a woman I wanted to step into such a situation recently and my husband told me to back off, that its none of my business. I’m really tormenting myself about it. I know his wife well and the guy was well out of line.  

sorry even if there were plenty issues in the marriage i would personally ask for a stop. if he insist in continuing that is his signal my opinions dont matter to him.

sadly i had to call the cuttons on a good friend last year cos my mrs was feeling uncomfortable with his presence. i had spoken to him several times personally but the best he could come up with was "i wont bring her to your house" that was not good enough.

it is everyone right to do whatever they wish. it is my right too to demand i dont be associated with bad behaviour.  

what if the wife came to meet you there?  what if it was your husband and she knew what would you expect she does? show me your friends as they say

If you see someone about to make a mistake, its your responsibility to try to stop him/her. If you are really his friend, you owe him that much.

I dont think that's interferance.

where is the mistake here?

a guy trying to woo a gurl is a mistake?

abeggi

Is your friend a grown man? Has he got pubes on his privates? Is he working and have his own source of income? Is he cute and ladies love him? If you answer yes to any of the questions I suggest you mind you own damn business.



I will not stop a grown man from doing what he seems to enjoy. He is not affecting or hurting anyone. Yes he is not hurting anyone, what the wife don't know wont hurt.

Ujujoan:

If you see someone about to make a mistake, its your responsibility to try to stop him/her. If you are really his friend, you owe him that much.

I dont think that's interferance.

One man's mistake is another man's right, correct and morally acceptable answer!

mrsb:

Guys, here is a hypothetical question for you……,

If you see a married friend of yours about to make a stupid mistake with a chick – do you call him out? Let’s say you’re really good friends with his wife, Godfather to his kids etc. There are no issues in the marriage, it is just a stupid drunken situation and you can see your boy is about to cross the line.

Would you look the other way?

YES I will look the other way while he performs the act but I MIGHT talk to him sometimes later when he is in a sober mood.(Might in quote)

Wat if you keep telling you friend and he refuses because i'm having a case like dat even on the day of his introduction one girl still dey wait for my friend,wetin we go kall dat one.

~ I've been taught to always mind my biz. I'ld only stop him if he's not in a right state of mind. I'l neva support him though. ~

funny, i have friend who is married and cheating on his wife the thing is the woman he is cheating with doesn't even look better than his wife and i keep asking him why he is trying to throw his married life away but he continues to act like he is a player. All i can say is if you have a marriedfriend who is cheating remind them of how they would loose everything they have worked hard for and if they dont listen sit back and watch the explosion when the shti hits the fan

@ Topic.

Nope. . . . . .infact, I will encourage him. But if the friend is a "she", she must not cheat ooo. , . . . .(women are not allowed to cheat from the village I come from)

Guy to guy. . . .cool. . .
female to MALE. . .or Male to Female. . .not so good.

I would exterminate the dude's passion by tongue lashing him so that his thing would not be able to rise to the occasion, but would not tell the woman anything

omega25red:

funny, i have friend who is married and cheating on his wife the thing is the woman he is cheating with doesn't even look better than his wife . . .

That has always been the case since time immemorial

Yes, I'll burst his bubbles.

sillyboy:

@ Topic.

Nope. . . . . .infact, I will encourage him. But if the friend is a "she", she must not cheat ooo. , . . . .(women are not allowed to cheat from the village I come from)

Wole, I hope you don't think your post was funny.

Cuz it's NOT!!!

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo Sexist!

The rules of engagement still hasnt changed.

"Dont concern yourself with shit that aint none of your business".


If I were out with the boys and my best friend is about to cheat on his wife with some lady, I would simply hand him a condom with a note on it saying "Dont get caught buddie".

I dont know bout girls, but boys will rarely disuade a fellow boy from cheating on their spouses. It part of the unwritten rule, somewhere close to the "dont rat" rule.

Okija_juju:

The rules of engagement still hasnt changed.

"Dont concern yourself with shit that aint none of your business".


If I were out with the boys and my best friend is about to cheat on his wife with some lady, I would simply hand him a condom with a note on it saying "Dont get caught buddie".

I dont know bout girls, but boys will rarely disuade a fellow boy from cheating on their spouses. It part of the unwritten rule, somewhere close to the "dont rat" rule.

Thats how StIs and STDs spread but I guess the spread of diseases come with the unwritten rule in the "don't snitch code" that guys are born with. Girls have our own girl version but it is usually practiced by those of low moral fiber.

Dont hate the player dear, its just what it is.

In all my life, I am yet to hear a guy say to another guy "Oboy no carry that babe o!, if Karo hear am or catch you, she go vex". No not once.
So I guess it must be part of the unwritten law.
I have seen my girl friends boyfriends cheat on them in front of me, just cos they know I will not tattle.

This is one of those situations were right is wrong and wrong is right. _{(get my drift?)}

Okija_juju:

Dont hate the player dear, its just what it is.

In all my life, I am yet to hear a guy say to another guy "Oboy no carry that babe o!, if Karo hear am or catch you, she go vex". No not once.
So I guess it must be part of the unwritten law.
I have seen my girl friends boyfriends cheat on them in front of me, just cos they know I will not tattle.

This is one of those situations were right is wrong and wrong is right. _{(get my drift?)}

I have had guys with balls almost fight other guys for cheating on other girls. But I guess when you are afraid of another person it is justified by calling it tattling.

Picture this.

Its boys night out! after a few bottles, one decides to take a strange girl to bed, what would you do??

Talk to him bout breaking his girlsfriends heart?? or bout STD's??

HELLZ NO!! You would be looked on as not being a real dude/big boy/correct man e.t.c. You women might not see that as a problem but we guys dont do that. Its so bad that if you happened to be out with your boyfriend and witness such an act, and dare speak out or to the guy bout it, you may not know it but you are making your man look bad in front of his homies.

Inasmuch as I know its wrong, its the norm. WHo are we to change it!!

I don't keep friends that cheat on their partners.

one thing ive learnt is to only give advice to real friends. If you are not in my inner circle or dont ask my opinion i say nothing. Ive dragged many a friend both male and female back from the brink of adultery. Its overrated. Its cheap thrills and after the highs and the cheap sex, theres nothing left. My take has always been to fight to keep your family together. Thats all you really have.

Women can do that, Men dont!

Wow. Thanks for all the responses. Some varied morals here on NL!

Update on the situation - the wife found out (nothing to do with me - I took all your advice!!!). She is totally devastated, threatened to leave with kids etc but has chosen to forgive her husband - he swears it was a one off mistake and is genuinely remorseful. He's said all the right things and seems to mean them . Not sure if she'll really manage to move on properly - forgiving is one thing but forgetting is another. She's turned to the bible for comfort so good luck to her.

As for me - she doesn't know I was there so I guess she doesn't need to know. I feel bad. I really liked her husband - he seemed like a cool guy who adored her and the kids but I have now lost all respect for him, even if it was a "one off act of destructive behaviour".

Sorry - one last thing. He got busted cos she went through his phone - WHEN ARE THESE GUYS GOING TO LEARN - DELETE DELETE DELETE.

In this situation as a one-off - I honestly believe she didn't need to know so he could have saved her a lot of heartache by following the simple rules. CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF.

yes i will as many times as possible

"birds of same character flocks together" for a guy to be bold enough to carry a chick in your presence means he knows or thinks you do the same thing.
statictics have shown that 98 % of married men still throw passes outside.
ENI TI ILE BA MO BA NI BARAWO.

NOTE : THESE DOES NOT APPLY TO WOMEN OOOO.

I'll stay cool and watch.

i think i'll give him/her a piece of my mind, at least to free my conscience. the thing is some do it for fun because its being their way of life before marriage and they cant just stop it! God help us o,

yes!