a2space:
I am a 37 year old bachelor and I must confess that never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that someday I would be desperate to get married. When I was in my twenties, I used to hear of desperation amongst ladies to get married but I never clearly understood the feeling. I felt it was a "lady thing" until I got to the age of 34yrs. One day I was in my bedroom suddenly I felt the rush of emotions come upon me so strongly that all of a sudden started making me feel desperate for marriage. By the following year the desperate feeling became like torture and the loneliness was so depressing. I could no longer stand it when I attended weddings to see other young couples getting married. I could no longer stand it when I hear people discussing marriage around me.

I became like an object of fun in the office when they would call me "the oldest bachelor". I'm telling you, the feeling is not funny at all. Even when people innocently ask "Hey, why are you not yet married?" or "what are u waiting for?" It's a question that I just can't take emotionally. Though I'm doing my best to tie the knot soon but I must confess that it is a feeling that I don't even wish my enemies to have.

If me as a guy could be feeling like this, I can just imagine what single ladies of marriageable age are passing through emotionally.
For those of you reading my post, it is my prayer that you all get married at the right time and age so that you don't have to pass through the same emotional trauma of loneliness and desperation to get married.

misspicy:

I can't see nothing,maybe my other account

prettyjo:
.

moriarity:
. Take it easy on him God's time is the best

robosky02:



kachi make this truck no jam you hmmmmmmmmmm

lol

FisifunKododada:
Marriage is NOT mandatory. I repeat marriage is NOT mandatory. Its a cultural expectation. Like believing in God or going to church or mosque. There is nothing intrinsically NEEDFUL about it. And if you enter marriage out of desperation, you will be more likely to end up with one of these very numerous one-chance marriages that will cut your lifespan by half. Be a man. Think for yourself and stop worrying too much about people's and cultural expectations. If you die now, none of these people disturbing your life will agree to join you 6 feet under. Wise up bro.

cremedelacreme:
I wonder why people would not mind their business. It's really annoying when people keep on asking you "what are you waiting for?". Everybody must not marry in their twenties. My advice to the unmarried ones is not to allow pressure from people to push you into marrying the wrong person.

smileysmiles:
I know this feeling. Lol

tosyne2much:
Na Dy.geasy quote you remember, you no fit remember my own.. Diaris God oooo


I smell a rat

blakky97:

bro, what are the factors that make mr A get married at 25 and mr B at 50? please dont say money because not all married people are rich. and some people get rich while married.

Amhappy:
Good luck bro. For those who desire to get married,pray to God for a suitable partner and hold on to the right person when he/she comes along. The truth remains that at as age increases,it is more tough for ladies,so don't wait for so long. The pressure you will put on yourself alone is huge not to talk of the one from ur family and friends. A friend of mine just got duped in the name of love. A beautiful lady that many men were dying for some years back. She was a good preacher against desperation and I still couldn't believe it caught her.

deeptesting:


You cannot factor it to just one reason, people do same thing for different reasons especially in marriage.. However, from my point of view people go into marriage for wrong reasons in this part of the world as a result of our cultural belief in marriage that once a man or a woman is of age the next expectation is to get married and start raising their children. Hence, majority marry because they are of age, have a job, have a roof over their head, A is married so why won`t B etc and that is why we have so many unstable homes and people who are married but lonely or not happy and does quadruplet the rate of cheating and broken homes.

Of course you know it is rare to find an African Man not married at 50. Those who marry late are an exception who do not follow the dogma or general convention.

a2space:
I am a 37 year old bachelor and I must confess that never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that someday I would be desperate to get married. When I was in my twenties, I used to hear of desperation amongst ladies to get married but I never clearly understood the feeling. I felt it was a "lady thing" until I got to the age of 34yrs. One day I was in my bedroom suddenly I felt the rush of emotions come upon me so strongly that all of a sudden started making me feel desperate for marriage. By the following year the desperate feeling became like torture and the loneliness was so depressing. I could no longer stand it when I attended weddings to see other young couples getting married. I could no longer stand it when I hear people discussing marriage around me.

I became like an object of fun in the office when they would call me "the oldest bachelor". I'm telling you, the feeling is not funny at all. Even when people innocently ask "Hey, why are you not yet married?" or "what are u waiting for?" It's a question that I just can't take emotionally. Though I'm doing my best to tie the knot soon but I must confess that it is a feeling that I don't even wish my enemies to have.

If me as a guy could be feeling like this, I can just imagine what single ladies of marriageable age are passing through emotionally.
For those of you reading my post, it is my prayer that you all get married at the right time and age so that you don't have to pass through the same emotional trauma of loneliness and desperation to get married.

blakky97:

theres a saying that a man cannever be too different from his environment for too long. if you leave a British woman in the village for some time, she will learn how to sweep with broom, wash clothes with hands and soap, and cook with firewood. now my point is this; if your social environment demands that you are married at a particular stage in your life, it will, of necessity, impose a psychological stress on you amd either force you to go out of your way to comply, migrate, or live without confidence and certainty

initialize:
i feel this thread.... It's talking to me. Ymodulus keeps asking me when but he knows i wont marry myself


I'm searching for her on this thread

blakky97:

if you leave a British woman in the village for some time, she will learn how to sweep with broom, wash clothes with hands and soap, and cook with firewood.

jamela:
I understand what the op is going through. A sage once said, the older you get the less friends you have around you. You now have more of accomplices. Now for the OP, the lonliness you feel is as a result of many things. 1. You're losing your youthful good looks, figure, hair, and most young ladies you meet treat you like you some dirty old sugar daddy, thereby narrowing the chances of ever finding true love each passing year. 2. All your mates would rather spend time with their families and attend their family/children's occasions than spend time hanging out with you. 3. Everyday people, office gate security, neighbours, cleaners or even road side policemen show more respect in their behaviour and greetings to those married people you are even much older than cos they see the others looking more responsible when they turn up with family. 4. You worry about how long you have left to live and if you would ever live long enough to see your grandchild. 5. It suddenly looks like you have been asleep chasing money or whatever else kept you unaware for so long and now you start to think what about all your female friends on your contacts, but as soon as you scan through you realise they are all married so you have to start afresh in chasing ladies and your pick up skills may have worn out. 6. You consider the fact that if you are meeting a new lady for the first time, you are probably gonna need some time to really know her before you commit to marriage and this time could all be wasted if she turns out to be wrong and you have to start afresh with another.

The solution to all these is go down on your knees and pray. Ask God to take control of your life and your situation. Many are married and wish they weren't. Marriage is not the end but the beginning of a lifelong journey. All these fears you have are human but trust me they are not as bad as the fears of those living wit a human terror for a spouse. If it's God's will that you will marry trust in His time.

deeptesting:
Marriage does not cure loneliness, if that is the only reason for getting married then take a chill Pepsi big bottle and relax because many are married and still lonely.. Secondly, what people say or think about you at 37 should not be your business, neither should it force you to get married... Bro i simply want you marry because you understand the purpose of the contract called marriage.. "Solitude is a gift".

a2space:


You are the only one that has made the most reasonable comment so far that's why I'm quoting u. Thanks for your comments. from OP

a2space:
I am a 37 year old bachelor and I must confess that never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that someday I would be desperate to get married. When I was in my twenties, I used to hear of desperation amongst ladies to get married but I never clearly understood the feeling. I felt it was a "lady thing" until I got to the age of 34yrs. One day I was in my bedroom suddenly I felt the rush of emotions come upon me so strongly that all of a sudden started making me feel desperate for marriage. By the following year the desperate feeling became like torture and the loneliness was so depressing. I could no longer stand it when I attended weddings to see other young couples getting married. I could no longer stand it when I hear people discussing marriage around me.

I became like an object of fun in the office when they would call me "the oldest bachelor". I'm telling you, the feeling is not funny at all. Even when people innocently ask "Hey, why are you not yet married?" or "what are u waiting for?" It's a question that I just can't take emotionally. Though I'm doing my best to tie the knot soon but I must confess that it is a feeling that I don't even wish my enemies to have.

If me as a guy could be feeling like this, I can just imagine what single ladies of marriageable age are passing through emotionally.
For those of you reading my post, it is my prayer that you all get married at the right time and age so that you don't have to pass through the same emotional trauma of loneliness and desperation to get married.

jamela:


Now this point is just funny, the above was possible during the time of Mary Selessor. If you leave a 21st century British woman in your village, she would return to Britain as fast as she came and file a law suit to divorce you in seconds.

Btw, your point was well taught out, your example just caught my attention

blakky97:
when you acquire good properties, especially lands and a good business, you might just want to will it to someone after your demise. except you dont mind a child born out of wedlock, marriage comes to mind.
I really dream of being a father close to his kids, making a happy home, grooming sons and daughters who I will be proud of; and whose intellect will stupefy mortal minds. but the trouble here is; most ladies seek for comfort and security in marriage, dreaming of riches and fleeing any prospect of being paired up with a struggling man. I realise; the more progress I make the less attracted I get to ladies especially because they were absent at the beginning.