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4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by gbens2000(m): 4:57pm On Jan 04, 2016
[quote author=Diddyydiva post=41648079] okay!! undecided


please don't read alone but put it into practice smiley
I hope you are not ignorant of that too undecided I just got that feeling you know nothing and claim to know all,did the op put ur name that it was meant for u alone.if u know all open dullardland.it will be easy for u cuz u know all. Ode
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by IamLucy(f): 4:57pm On Jan 04, 2016
everyone is an adviser on NL
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 5:00pm On Jan 04, 2016
Diddyydiva:
undecided undecided
we all know this undecided
u sound proud
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Bollinger(m): 5:01pm On Jan 04, 2016
There is only one way to stay out of trouble with social media. Stay away from facebook, twitter, instagram and you'll be fine.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by gbens2000(m): 5:03pm On Jan 04, 2016
SAVEDBABA:
u sound proud
nothing dey her head if she knew all y she no open her own dullardland.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by acooriz(m): 5:03pm On Jan 04, 2016
All bullshit... If social media doesn't spice up ur marriage.. Who will
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 5:03pm On Jan 04, 2016
Secretario:
“SOCIAL MEDIA HAS RUINED MY RELATIONSHIP!”

That’s the cry of many people today! But my response is this: social media didn’t ruin your relationship he, she, or BOTH of you may have played a part in the ruining of your relationship.

Let’s back up and come to an agreement: social media is here and it probably isn’t going anywhere. So, we have to address this issue head on. It is definitely possible for your relationship and (insert social media type here!) to happily co-exist. Here are 4 ways to keep social media from ruining your relationship:

1) Stop Being “Single” Online but “In a Relationship” in Real Life:


Let’s be honest. For many people, social media is another form of online dating. With that said, people need to know very clearly that you are involved with someone. I get the whole argument, “people don’t need to be in my business.” But, guess what? You made it peoples’ business when you decided to get that account and create a username.

People might not need to know the ins and outs of your relationship. But they should at LEAST know you are married or in a relationship so that the lines don’t get blurred or any false messages are sent out. I can’t tell you the amount of times I hear people complain, “ I didn’t know they were married until it was too late.” (“Too late” usually means feelings have developed).

Social Media and Relationships

It’s your job, as a mate, to make sure it is clear to others that you aren’t open to anyone else and you are spoken for.

Being transparent will hopefully hold people to a higher standard of how they decide to communicate with you. This won’t stop everyone from pursuing you, but you have to care enough about your mate and your relationship to stop certain behavior before it starts. People may message you privately to get a feel for your willingness to be “more than friends” with them. But, this needs to be nipped in the bud by you, and it needs to happen immediately!

2) Don’t Believe Your Own Hype

You know, sometimes social media is a platform for people to subliminally tell you everything you want to hear. Between “likes,” “winks,” “pokes” and private messages, people will woo you all day and, naturally, you’ll start to like it. Suddenly, you may find yourself flattered because your Facebook “friends” may be showing you the attention that your partner hasn’t been showing you. It’s at this point that you must CHECK yourself!

Social Media and Relationships

This means it’s time to start communicating your needs to your partner instead of falling into the Facebook trap of that ex from back in the day, or that person you always had a crush on in college. You can’t glorify an Internet relationship over your “real-life” relationship and you can’t hold them to the same standard. So often, I see how the “harmless flirting” online turns into lunch in-person, and then into an affair that leads to a divorce or a break-up. The person online has probably pulled the same trick with their other 100 friends or followers. So, get back into communicating with your mate.

3) Stop It with the Sneaky Stuff

I’m not saying that your mate needs to know all of your passwords to everything. But, I am saying it will look very suspicious and make them very uncomfortable if you are uncomfortable with them seeing your pages or interactions. If you are uneasy every time they come around or if you close out of your pages when your mate enters the room or takes a look over your shoulder, then something isn’t right. If you are sweating bullets because you left your page up and your spouse is the next person on the computer, then you will look GUILTY!

Social Media and Relationships

When you are able to be completely open, your mate will feel more comfortable about you and your relationship with social media. This is not to say they don’t trust you, but it is to say that everyone has some level of curiosity and hiding things only makes for unnecessary tension and concern. Additionally, when you are open, you think twice about the things, whether innocent or not, that could be misinterpreted or seen as disrespectful. It makes you more cognizant and also you gain a level of peace in your relationship.

4) You Must Have Some Limitations

I’ll admit it. I’ve been guilty at times of being so engulfed in social media for my business that I forget that my wife, at home, needs the same kind of attention. Social media is so accessible we don’t realize the amount of time we spend on it. Furthermore, we don’t see how much it bothers our mates to have to compete with it.

Social Media and Relationships

Place some limitations on yourself. For instance, after a certain time, you unplug. No electronics during dinner or during dates. Whatever you have to do, try to do it so your mate knows he or she is most important to you in the time you all spend together instead of the online friends we spend so much time keeping up with. It may take some self-reflection and some strategic planning (especially if you use it for business), but it will be worth it for you and your relationship.

Remember, your mate wants nothing more than to be able to trust you 100%, even beyond the screens of social media and the Internet. Remember that when those cyber friends are gone, your mate is the one who is actually going to be there in person, where it matters most. Don’t allow social media to ruin your relationship.

Secretario
anything online is fake!

Fake pictures

Fake smiley grin


Fake comments


Fake emotional words


Fake fake love

Just fake and fake.

That's why I stop online dating a long time ago and Facebook of a thing.

We will be acting Mr and Mrs lover boy and girl online while we are monsters offline.


WOMEN will be coming here and be FORMING miss independent, I'm not a gold DIGGERS while offline there are nothing but a leech


Be FORMING beauty on there dp with pictures which have been taken decades ago but offline there are as ugly as rat and fat as a pig.

Nothing is just real online and it is very hard to see online people getting married.


How will I know your pasonality online undecided while we will be deceiving each others with beautiful and lovely words,

I can claim to be anything I want to be online and even decieve WOMEN with my level of intellect but who I'm actually deceiving undecided (myself of cause )

Naturally we don't want to hear and know the truth that's why we came up with something to boost what we are all hiding and called it a social media!

Imagine a woman online making a request that she want a God fearing man, financial independent and a loving man with big eyes and six feet tall undecided when we know it is leterally impossible to have that kind of a man offline and she herself will have nothing of that character she want online.


What more can I say!

2 Likes

Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by prideofscience: 5:04pm On Jan 04, 2016
Distance/online relationship, is Not a relationship. Its Just a friend ship
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by DanielPop(m): 5:05pm On Jan 04, 2016
I like the way the guy finally ignored you. Hope you learnt from it sire! grin
Diddyydiva:
okay!! undecided


please don't read alone but put it into practice smiley


I hope you are not ignorant of that too undecided






bye undecided
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by slap1(m): 5:11pm On Jan 04, 2016
Maturity and knowing what one wants is very important.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by slap1(m): 5:12pm On Jan 04, 2016
sonofananimal:
anything online is fake!

Fake pictures

Fake smiley grin


Fake comments


Fake emotional words


Fake fake love

Just fake and fake.

That's why I stop online dating a long time ago and Facebook of a thing.

We will be acting Mr and Mrs lover boy and girl online while we are monsters offline.


WOMEN will be coming here and be FORMING miss independent, I'm not a gold DIGGERS while offline there are nothing but a leech


Be FORMING beauty on there dp with pictures which have been taken decade ago but offline there are as ugly as rat and fat as a pig

Oga you're not happy. What happened?
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by viktor01(m): 5:13pm On Jan 04, 2016
All na wash, never take them serious
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by pabjo: 5:14pm On Jan 04, 2016
we no finish with the one we dey See na online we go just into for dating.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by joseph1832(m): 5:15pm On Jan 04, 2016
Diddyydiva:
undecided undecided

we all know this undecided
By "we" you mean who and who exactly? I hope its your mind, body and soul?

Just dey gather yan for here. Mtscheew.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 5:16pm On Jan 04, 2016
gbens2000:
nothing dey her head if she knew all y she no open her own dullardland.
lol.....easy on her before she kill hersef grin
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 5:17pm On Jan 04, 2016
slap1:


Oga you're not happy. What happened?
probably because today is Monday, always hate Mondays angry
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by banio: 5:18pm On Jan 04, 2016
Social media gave me the love of my life " Oghenemaro". Thank God it did not ruin my life.

But social media could cause devastatation in ur life.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 5:25pm On Jan 04, 2016
Bollinger:
There is only one way to stay out of trouble with social media. Stay away from facebook, twitter, instagram and you'll be fine.
exactly
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by FORTUNES247: 5:32pm On Jan 04, 2016
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by henryhemon(m): 5:34pm On Jan 04, 2016
Bollinger:
There is only one way to stay out of trouble with social media. Stay away from facebook, twitter, instagram and you'll be fine.

Twitter is out of it.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 5:49pm On Jan 04, 2016
[quote author=gbens2000 post=41650115][/quote].one of the bloody ignoramus grin grin grin
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Cutehector(m): 5:56pm On Jan 04, 2016
Op really nailed it on the head.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 6:06pm On Jan 04, 2016
Awwwwwwwww nice write up!!op respect!! cheesy
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Reeebirth(m): 6:58pm On Jan 04, 2016
Now this is what i call 911 okada park me here before i kpono.......
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by veraiyke(m): 7:02pm On Jan 04, 2016
Guy eh this is the only post here I will be endorsing 100 percent. Nice one
Secretario:
“SOCIAL MEDIA HAS RUINED MY RELATIONSHIP!”

That’s the cry of many people today! But my response is this: social media didn’t ruin your relationship he, she, or BOTH of you may have played a part in the ruining of your relationship.

Let’s back up and come to an agreement: social media is here and it probably isn’t going anywhere. So, we have to address this issue head on. It is definitely possible for your relationship and (insert social media type here!) to happily co-exist. Here are 4 ways to keep social media from ruining your relationship:

1) Stop Being “Single” Online but “In a Relationship” in Real Life:


Let’s be honest. For many people, social media is another form of online dating. With that said, people need to know very clearly that you are involved with someone. I get the whole argument, “people don’t need to be in my business.” But, guess what? You made it peoples’ business when you decided to get that account and create a username.

People might not need to know the ins and outs of your relationship. But they should at LEAST know you are married or in a relationship so that the lines don’t get blurred or any false messages are sent out. I can’t tell you the amount of times I hear people complain, “ I didn’t know they were married until it was too late.” (“Too late” usually means feelings have developed).

Social Media and Relationships

It’s your job, as a mate, to make sure it is clear to others that you aren’t open to anyone else and you are spoken for.

Being transparent will hopefully hold people to a higher standard of how they decide to communicate with you. This won’t stop everyone from pursuing you, but you have to care enough about your mate and your relationship to stop certain behavior before it starts. People may message you privately to get a feel for your willingness to be “more than friends” with them. But, this needs to be nipped in the bud by you, and it needs to happen immediately!

2) Don’t Believe Your Own Hype

You know, sometimes social media is a platform for people to subliminally tell you everything you want to hear. Between “likes,” “winks,” “pokes” and private messages, people will woo you all day and, naturally, you’ll start to like it. Suddenly, you may find yourself flattered because your Facebook “friends” may be showing you the attention that your partner hasn’t been showing you. It’s at this point that you must CHECK yourself!

Social Media and Relationships

This means it’s time to start communicating your needs to your partner instead of falling into the Facebook trap of that ex from back in the day, or that person you always had a crush on in college. You can’t glorify an Internet relationship over your “real-life” relationship and you can’t hold them to the same standard. So often, I see how the “harmless flirting” online turns into lunch in-person, and then into an affair that leads to a divorce or a break-up. The person online has probably pulled the same trick with their other 100 friends or followers. So, get back into communicating with your mate.

3) Stop It with the Sneaky Stuff

I’m not saying that your mate needs to know all of your passwords to everything. But, I am saying it will look very suspicious and make them very uncomfortable if you are uncomfortable with them seeing your pages or interactions. If you are uneasy every time they come around or if you close out of your pages when your mate enters the room or takes a look over your shoulder, then something isn’t right. If you are sweating bullets because you left your page up and your spouse is the next person on the computer, then you will look GUILTY!

Social Media and Relationships

When you are able to be completely open, your mate will feel more comfortable about you and your relationship with social media. This is not to say they don’t trust you, but it is to say that everyone has some level of curiosity and hiding things only makes for unnecessary tension and concern. Additionally, when you are open, you think twice about the things, whether innocent or not, that could be misinterpreted or seen as disrespectful. It makes you more cognizant and also you gain a level of peace in your relationship.

4) You Must Have Some Limitations

I’ll admit it. I’ve been guilty at times of being so engulfed in social media for my business that I forget that my wife, at home, needs the same kind of attention. Social media is so accessible we don’t realize the amount of time we spend on it. Furthermore, we don’t see how much it bothers our mates to have to compete with it.

Social Media and Relationships

Place some limitations on yourself. For instance, after a certain time, you unplug. No electronics during dinner or during dates. Whatever you have to do, try to do it so your mate knows he or she is most important to you in the time you all spend together instead of the online friends we spend so much time keeping up with. It may take some self-reflection and some strategic planning (especially if you use it for business), but it will be worth it for you and your relationship.

Remember, your mate wants nothing more than to be able to trust you 100%, even beyond the screens of social media and the Internet. Remember that when those cyber friends are gone, your mate is the one who is actually going to be there in person, where it matters most. Don’t allow social media to ruin your relationship.

Secretario
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by ify123destiny(m): 7:03pm On Jan 04, 2016
mifavour:
number one is rubbish
What makes it rubbish, Y live a fake life on a social platform & when it comes 2 d real world u are completely different. Dat's where many get it wrong. Be Original, Sincere & Transparent. Nice piecs @OP
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Nobody: 7:23pm On Jan 04, 2016
the year just began. better stuffs coming
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by Eberex(m): 7:28pm On Jan 04, 2016
It all starts from facebook ofcourse since almost everyone owns an account. For many they have their phone contacts on their profile for the world to see and next thing is, they add you up and connect with you on whatsapp. Truth is social media is causing more harm than good.

For instance my girl is not a fan of all these social media but recently I got her a phone and she was like, I would like to download facebook, twitter, instagram, wechat, whatsapp etc. I looked at her and was like "since when did you stary having interest in all these"?

Is it possible she would eventually get used to all these social network if she eventually join in? I will not stop her from downloading whatever she want but I'll let her know what she is inviting into the relationship and for her to know it was her choice to have them Apps.
Re: 4 Ways To Keep Social Media From Ruining Your Relationship by zena2009(f): 7:30pm On Jan 04, 2016
Nice topic!

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