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Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by 9jeria: 1:03pm On Jan 27, 2016
THIS CANNOT HAPPEN IN THE NORTH. NORTH IS SPECIAL NIGERIA.

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by peacengine(m): 1:03pm On Jan 27, 2016
OP, I be man like you but I disagree. It is not only one issue that causes divorces. What of men that divorce their wives when she cannot give him a child. Guy, na woman born you o

8 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by BABANGBALI: 1:04pm On Jan 27, 2016
me i dey help my wife cook and wash he r clothes especially her bra and pants and i dey enjoy am because if i no wash dem she no go give me food and toto chop

6 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by shalomm: 1:08pm On Jan 27, 2016
Strahovski1:
I will take you serious when you post the other version of this directed at men as this is directed at women.

Besides a woman refusing control over her husband should not break a marriage it means there wasn't love in the first place. Today people have turned marriage into an obligation whether their love is true or not.. marriage! And that is when things like this come in.. why would a man be picky because he cannot control his wife? Did he marry her to control her? Also why would a woman be rude to her husband because she is in a higher position? There is no love.

Man, what makes marriage last is love.. not subjection or advanced slavery.. love is what keeps marriage. When there is love.. the woman would respect her hubby as the hubby will respect her. Not one sided subjection because one god commanded it.
i pity the mumu wer go marry u.

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by IVORY2009(m): 1:08pm On Jan 27, 2016
Marriages are falling apart after 10yrs, reasons are that most couples do not take time to study themselves before agreeing to tie the knot, this has actually contributed to the earily breakup of marriages thisday.

2 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by xynerise: 1:09pm On Jan 27, 2016
prettythicksme:
My marriage is now 20yrs!
Are you up to 20years?
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by KruggerINC(m): 1:09pm On Jan 27, 2016
Strahovski1:
I will take you serious when you post the other version of this directed at men as this is directed at women.

Besides a woman refusing control over her husband should not break a marriage it means there wasn't love in the first place. Today people have turned marriage into an obligation whether their love is true or not.. marriage! And that is when things like this come in.. why would a man be picky because he cannot control his wife? Did he marry her to control her? Also why would a woman be rude to her husband because she is in a higher position? There is no love.

Man, what makes marriage last is love.. not subjection or advanced slavery.. love is what keeps marriage. When there is love.. the woman would respect her hubby as the hubby will respect her. Not one sided subjection because one god commanded it.


Be careful how address then Almighty God.....anyway I don't need to tell you He has seen for himself how you have disrespected him and I pray He has mercy on you.

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by KruggerINC(m): 1:09pm On Jan 27, 2016
Strahovski1:
I will take you serious when you post the other version of this directed at men as this is directed at women.

Besides a woman refusing control over her husband should not break a marriage it means there wasn't love in the first place. Today people have turned marriage into an obligation whether their love is true or not.. marriage! And that is when things like this come in.. why would a man be picky because he cannot control his wife? Did he marry her to control her? Also why would a woman be rude to her husband because she is in a higher position? There is no love.

Man, what makes marriage last is love.. not subjection or advanced slavery.. love is what keeps marriage. When there is love.. the woman would respect her hubby as the hubby will respect her. Not one sided subjection because one god commanded it.


Be careful how address the Almighty God.....anyway I don't need to tell you He has seen for himself how you have disrespected him and I pray He has mercy on you.
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by histemple: 1:09pm On Jan 27, 2016
Op. May God bless you for this post. I just hope a lot of married nairalanders will take a cue from it and start the required adjustment and corrective approach.

Another factor in my opinion based on my observations and personal experience is "Family Interference" especially the mother in law trying to always know what is going on in her child's home.

2 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by talktonase(m): 1:10pm On Jan 27, 2016
Estharfabian:
OMG! You're amazing!!embarassed



Sadly! NOT Nigerian. We really Could Use Your brains Around Here.


why do many nigerian ladies stereotype their men? There are many with splendid marriage philosophies...
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by ril19(m): 1:11pm On Jan 27, 2016
OP is in line...


main reason is that people generally fail to apply what the originator of marriage union says in the bible.


second is that satan is working hard attacking families because it is the foundation of every society. if the family is in shambles it extents to the society at large.

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by deeptesting(m): 1:12pm On Jan 27, 2016
Strahovski1:


Yeah, i am one of those people who see marriage as a partnership between two people in love. Oh i'm male.. and i'm proud to be a man.. so continue shaking your head.

Love your wife. If you do, all what you posted wont even be an issue. That's my point. Love is unconditional. It has no "but" or "if".

Bro "That is how it should be but that is not what it is". Can human love unconditionally without reciprocation from the other party? I guess you are not married... No doubt love is a necessary factor in marriage but keeping the marriage requires more than love.. Or are you Jesus Christ? As they say "Easier said than done".

The reason for failed marriages cannot be pinned to one, two or three factors, so also the solution. The success of a marriage is dependent on the two individuals involve, how much are they willing & determined to swim the tide together.

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by banmee(m): 1:12pm On Jan 27, 2016
DrPurposeful:
The very moment you say you are accepting a man's proposal for marriage, you are coming under subjection. Subjection is not torment.
A man who fears the Lord doesn't take that for-granted to abuse and take due advantage of you.
Subjecting to your spouse is a command from God. Because the man is the head of the home as Christ is the head of the church, that is not the time or reason to get so proud and become fool of yourself to the extent that you cannot respect your wife and listen to her many good words and advice.
The reason why many marriages never last is because the woman is so highly placed and doesn't need any man to control her or be in charge of her. Because of her degree from harvard and position with Chevron, she see no reason why an ordinary bank branch manager or a medical doctor with one small health centre in port harcourt would control her or tell her what to do when she controls men in her work place and thousands of people calling her Ma/madam.
Don't allow position or class of degree fool you. If you cannot stand a man(your husband) telling you what to do, better remain single and no man would ever have control over you.
Most women compare their rich dad with their spouse; it shouldn't be so.
Respect your husband, listen when he speaks and welcome him when he comes home. Don't always be the complaining kind of wife.
When you give a man all he requires and he still treats your wrongly, then he needs God's intervention.
No man is too big to assist the wife in the kitchen; after all she is you and you are one.
The reason also why so many marriages break up after 10yrears is because most couple watch celebrities on television and want to do the things they do. Never live your life based on the happenings in some other persons life.
Love your spouse, obey and respect them; then show me where the devil would come in... Never give the devil the chance to ruin your marriage.
You will prosper!
You will Succeed!


Lol. . .the only reason marriages fail is because inability of the husband to LEAD. Don't shift the blame to women. Lead your household and your spouse will follow. This is not the '60s and it is no longer a man's world. People need to start waking up to this reality. cool

10 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by ademega(m): 1:13pm On Jan 27, 2016
hmmmm
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by histemple: 1:13pm On Jan 27, 2016
Strahovski1:
I will take you serious when you post the other version of this directed at men as this is directed at women.

Besides a woman refusing control over her husband should not break a marriage it means there wasn't love in the first place. Today people have turned marriage into an obligation whether their love is true or not.. marriage! And that is when things like this come in.. why would a man be picky because he cannot control his wife? Did he marry her to control her? Also why would a woman be rude to her husband because she is in a higher position? There is no love.

Man, what makes marriage last is love.. not subjection or advanced slavery.. love is what keeps marriage. When there is love.. the woman would respect her hubby as the hubby will respect her. Not one sided subjection because one god commanded it.

Smoking weed is bad I swear.

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by Nobody: 1:14pm On Jan 27, 2016
talktonase:
why do many nigerian ladies stereotype their men? There are many with splendid marriage philosophies...
Just when and how did I stereotype?shocked



Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by quivah(f): 1:16pm On Jan 27, 2016
shalomm:
i pity the mumu wer go marry u.
You are the fool here, stop mocking yourself.

4 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by gsalvatore: 1:16pm On Jan 27, 2016
The point is some Men are plain assh0les likewise some women...

If you are unlucky to get any of them...then you are doomed.

Illusion of intelligence (education) is one major factor

But I think most women have lost the way more than the men..

5 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by viktor01(m): 1:17pm On Jan 27, 2016
Where is this Jennifer sef....please come and read this ooo

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by VhatAmazingDude: 1:20pm On Jan 27, 2016
'Most Marriages' is not an ideal representation of reality.
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by davedpo(m): 1:22pm On Jan 27, 2016
MrsChima:
There are many different reasons why many marriages do not exceed 10 years.
Some people gets married for the wrong reasons; green cards, to escape poverty, family pressure, desperation, deception, and many more.
However, couples that are married or have been married in good faith will still have struggles in their marriages. Cheating, addiction of some sorts, death, abuse, disconnection from the Higher Power, and many more can break a marriage. Marriage is not easy and it is not for the faint hearts it requires work and dedication. It is about teamwork and supporting each other.
Some couples needs to be honest about marriage and encourage professional counseling or seek advice of a TRUSTED NEUTRAL person that won't takes sides. Sometimes a fresh pair of eyes may be what your marriage needs and not everyone wants to see
Couples unhappy and miserable.
Respect and effective communication is imperative to a longer and happy marriages . Some couples are so caught up with trying to outdo other family members that are married many decades and NOT FOCUSED on the health of their marriage. It is not about how long you have been married, but it is about how to have a happy and healthy marriage until it is time to part ways (hopefully it is death).
To control your house (men) doesn't mean you have to treat your wife like one of the children. Even if you have a submissive wife to no fault, she will eventually rebel. You will get more out of her if she feels loved and cherished and you are making good decisions that ensures her stability. Women likes to feel secured and safe. Two heads are better than one when it comes to decisions and planning. Asking your wife for her opinions and thoughts doesn't make you less of a man but more importantly, well-informed decision maker.
If there is no love and intimacy in the marriage, it won't last beyond a few years regardless.
Women choose men based on sustenance attributes and not superficial matters. A man that truly loves his mother will truly love you. Look at how he treats his mother and the female relatives. It is a true indication of how he will treat you! I understand that you do not want a man that has nothing, but instead of looking at what he has material wisely, pay attention how he manage his upkeep and business. If he is not effective, the car and nice house won't be accessible for long! Pay attention to how he is with money and what he does when he is not around his business. You will then see his priority and if he is money obsessive.
Choose compatible spouses and focus on the 80% of the person. A woman of 80% guarantee is better than a woman of 20% guarantee. Get married because you are ready and understand what work is required to maintain it. If you are married and truly gave it your all to make your marriage stronger and you are still not happy. Walk away. Maybe separation is necessary to see the bigger picture and discover other possible solutions. Do not stay in a toxic marriage for the sake of your children. You are reaching your children it is okay to settle and accept this type of treatment from your relationship. They will choose based on their experience they have learned from their parents and continue the vicious cycle that will pass down generations. I am sure that is not THE LEGACY you want to leave behind!
vry tru
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by viktor01(m): 1:22pm On Jan 27, 2016
banmee:


Lol. . .the only reason marriages fail is because inability of the husband to LEAD. Don't shift the blame to women. Lead your household and your spouse will follow. This is not the '60s and it is no longer a man's world. People need to start waking up to this reality. cool

Your statement is just so self contradictory.
How can the man lead when the woman feels we are now in the 21st century?

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by karpentar: 1:23pm On Jan 27, 2016
The major cause of divorce is marriage. Avoid it.

5 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by quivah(f): 1:24pm On Jan 27, 2016
Op, are you advising us based on your true life story
Why should a woman subject , I though the bible mentioned submit..
Are you by any chance into a master-slave relationship

And, now women are the problems in many failed marriages ok,.. Your reasoning is not only biased but faulty!
In one post you mentioned women's inability to subject is the cause of breakups, in another tone you said a woman should take it to prayer if after subjecting , the man still does her wrong..
What's this!

You only made few sense in your writeup... There are many reasons marriages fail ; infidelity, abuse, irresponsibility, lack of respect, 3rd party,lack of love etc..but to you, I believe only women are guilty..

12 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by misgab: 1:24pm On Jan 27, 2016
fear of God, a good conscience,being married to your friend mutual trust and respect.don't try to be smart with your man.is not all you see you talk about look for the right moment after a long time to discuss the matter i.e. after you must have prayed bout it.
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by blessedfavoured: 1:24pm On Jan 27, 2016
ideatoprince18:
THE SIMPLE REASON WHY MOST MARRIAGES DONt LAST IS DAT WOMEN CAN NEVER B SATISFIED ....... FEMINISM HAS TAKEN OVA D TOTAL BRAINS OF OUR WOMEN .....I HATE IT WHN I SEE A WOMAN CLAIMING EQUALITY WIT A MAN ....... THAT IS U AREE OPENLY SAYING THAT G-D DOES NOT KNOW WAT HE IS SAYING WHEN HE MADE MEN HEAD AND NOT HELPER ....... ANODA REEASON IS DAT ......... IF UR WIFE .... I REPEAT .... IF UR WIFE HAS TASTED UP TO FIVE DICK B4 SHE MARRIES U ...... SHE CAN NEVER B FAITHFUL!!!!"

Why are you screaming?
Aja bu e je ni?

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by talktonase(m): 1:25pm On Jan 27, 2016
Estharfabian:
Just when and how did I stereotype?shocked



The moment you consented to his views outrightly because he is NOT Nigerian and seeking to have such minds around when men dey here Yapppaa!

1 Like

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by judedwriter(m): 1:26pm On Jan 27, 2016
A woman is to sumbit to her husband no matter what and a husband is to love his wife sacrificially. A situation where the wife fails to sumbit and the husbands fails to love-that marriage is doomed! Even if a woman fails to sumbit but her husband. Still loves her, there is 50-50 chance of survival. But a scenario where the husband doesn't love her anymore and she is misbehaving out of spite for him-marriage RIP!
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by quivah(f): 1:29pm On Jan 27, 2016
misgab:
fear of God, a good conscience,being married to your friend mutual trust and respect.don't try to be smart with your man.is not all you see you talk about look for the right moment after a long time to discuss the matter i.e. after you must have prayed bout it.
Na wah o... A woman should wait after a long time to discuss a matter with her husband
He he he he

I'm sorry, what does this proves
I thought the way she tabled 'whatever issue' should be the advice.. So, she needs to wait a while before she can discuss with her husband.. How long does the husband waits to discuss matters with his wife.. After he must have prayed about it,definitely

8 Likes

Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by banmee(m): 1:29pm On Jan 27, 2016
viktor01:


Your statement is just so self contradictory.
How can the man lead when the woman feels we are now in the 21st century?

Leadership is all about confidence and influence. Marriage is no different than owning your own company. So because you have a confident wife you should have problems? If na so, you go de fire everybody you hire. You need to always self improve and grow. Both of you. Marriage is not about a slave and master relationship anymore. Change your mentality and you won't have problems.
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by ideatoprince18(m): 1:31pm On Jan 27, 2016
blessedfavoured:

Why are you screaming? Aja bu e je ni?
....... e dy pain me well well
Re: Why Most Marriages Never Exceed 10years by happney65: 1:31pm On Jan 27, 2016
prettythicksme:
My marriage is now 20yrs!

Another lie Mohammed. grin

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