lolaluv1:
OP

Don't be carried away by the erroneous propaganda that it is because you are a woman, you don't want to see your in laws, you shouldn't want privacy, if it is your brother, wont you endure, bla bla bla. Me I don't blame you.

You have every right to want your privacy.
1. Your husband can go out all day if he wants and avoids the visitor. As such, he is still living his life.
You are the one stuck at home, with the boy's shitty attitude.

2. The boy sees you as a lesser being, so why should you happily cater to someone who does not appreciate your little efforts? Even our father in heaven wants us to thank him for his mercies. How much more we humans?
Is it too much to say: Aunty, thank you for this meal. Then go to the kichen and wash his plate?

3. The boy obviously lacks both home training and empathy. I remember then, I just graduated and visited an uncle of mine. I would sweep, wash and help babysit. I saw the kids cloths soaked and washed them.
It was when I saw they wanted to defeat my purpose of job-hunting by stopping me from going to the cafe to apply and baby sit, that I now left.

MEN ARE EVEN WORSE, WHEN IT COMES TO THEIR IN LAWS STAYING.
That is when you hear:"But I just bought Milk. How come its finished". "Haaaaaa, soup finished. Again?"
Sometimes, they will even disappear without food in the house.
Making you feel like your sibling has finished consuming all the food in the house.

Before you know it, they start carrying face, staying out late or misbehaving till your sibling finds his/her square root.
Even you sef can be the one to tell your sibling: "Can you see how my husband is behaving, please it seems like you will go home for now.
And your sibling will go without grudges as he wants your home to work.
Meanwhile your sibling 99%of the time would assist with chores, unlike his sibling who is coming to give you more work and probably spy on the house to go back and tell his people.

ststyreal:

If the boy like, make him senior me hundred times, e no concern me, since him no no the right thing to do, I go teach am nawwww, abi, wetin you say make I do. If him go continue to dey stay with me, I go tell am wetin him go dey do for the house and if him refuse, na to show am say, na me get my house, person no go poor come add witch join nam for me. I don tell you wetin me go fit do. Seniority no dey for this one. Respect is reciprocal and if person behave like a child you treat am like a child. Na my own I talk so, full stop.......

Rossy99:
An undergraduate of polytechnic staying with us is growing wings. He doesn't help in domestic chores when hubby is away, he does when hubby is around, he Waits for us to tell him what to do before he does it and he is really making me angry which i hate to be.

When i report him to hubby, he won't do anything or even chastise him instead he complaints whenever i give him food that his food is too small. I'm not a bad type to give him little food cos i have conscience and it disturbs me wen i do bad but he is a glutton that only eats and sleeps without doing anything even to wash plates he use to eat.

What do i do?

Rossy99:
Am even ready to accomodate him cos i knw his family is not financially buoyant to get accomodation for him while still in skul,i expect him not go beyond his limit but he refuse.he is not d 1st person dt wud stay wit us.He is now causing division btw i nd hubby cos dey see me as d bad person,wen he want to get money frm hubby he wait till am out or go to meet him at d gate,is not that i do ask him not to give him.even wen he see dt i av wash all d dirty dishes in d kitchen,is he not suppose to wash d one he jst used in eating,he drop it nd i still go to wash it without saying anytin.i dnt knw wat he expect me to do again.he see me as a subordinate dat can't authorise him to do anytin

Rossy99:
Am even ready to accomodate him cos i knw his family is not financially buoyant to get accomodation for him while still in skul,i expect him not go beyond his limit but he refuse.he is not d 1st person dt wud stay wit us.He is now causing division btw i nd hubby cos dey see me as d bad person,wen he want to get money frm hubby he wait till am out or go to meet him at d gate,is not that i do ask him not to give him.even wen he see dt i av wash all d dirty dishes in d kitchen,is he not suppose to wash d one he jst used in eating,he drop it nd i still go to wash it without saying anytin.i dnt knw wat he expect me to do again.he see me as a subordinate dat can't authorise him to do anytin

greatgod2012:





ko le to yen!
This life is very simple!
And the world is a global village.

He needs your help now doesn't mean you can't need his help in the future.

It may even be your children that he will render help to in the nearest future.

We shouldn't use today to destroy our tomorrow.

Instead of making life miserable to him, speak out your mind to him, ask him if he too can accept what he's doing to you from another person. Not with screaming or cursing or throwing tantrums but maturely and patiently.


Remember, nobody is totally bad!

fellis:
Is the boy an id!ot?

How can a jobless person be complaining about the food he is given while living under another persons roof and not even doing anything to assist in the house, my God people like that irritate me. What does he think he is? A king that came to your house to be pampered? At least he should help with something to show you and your husband gratitude for taking care of him instead of just sitting around from morning till evening asking for more food.

What a lousy human being.

OP next time you and he and your husband eat on the same table or in the same room make sure you pile his plate of food very high to like twice or three times the amount you give your husband, if your husband says its too much tell him politely the boy is always complaining that you don't give him enough food so you want to make sure you serve him enough henceforth.

Do it like four times in the presence of your husband and unless he is a millionaire that has money to throw away he will call the boy and caution him on his eating habits.

dprof2016:
If he is nt doing houz chores,u shld abandon dem den, dnt do dem
b'cox he dnt wants 2 help let's c hu wil get divorce amongst u 2.I dunno d problem wit al dese modern wives,if he z ur relative would u ve cum here 2 say al dese abt him?

Freiden:


See this woman ooo.....Na you get your house....yan yan yan yan yan ..since the husband that brought him isn't complaining....wetin be your own....because say ur family dey feed am now...e gaz turn house help.....ure very funny....no be by force nao...the only person that has the right to compel him to do anything is the husband...and since the husband decides to say nothing ...he's cool with the guy. ...if her body dey hot make she jump enta pool.

delishpot:

It is a shame how men are not helping the younger men grow up to be responsible. Why allow your wife to be treated like shit in her own house? Many of the twisted men talking down on this woman would be the first to cry blood if their wife's brother does this type of shit to them.
You think being a wife and mother is easy? Why not sit at home and do the easy chores and,let your wife go do that very difficult work outside the home?
Anyway, I blame the Op for seeking advice on Nl where most of the people are kids in their teenage years. Who are happy to be lazy and believe marriage is for women to do as they are told and not complain.
Op, go seek advice from some mature person who you trust abeg.

paragon40:
hahaha this got me cracking (soup has finished again, but i just bought milk) damn funny.

bikefab:
Get a househelp...gaskia!

CrazyQuinn:
can you imagine the rubbish if I were you I would make his life miserable until he leaves

CrazyQuinn:
wow, the guy has no right to stay for that long what happened to privacy? Is he leaving soon? If not, complain to your husband and tell him your mind, if he doesn't listen, keep complaining to your husband until he tell the guy to leave. It's not right

CrazyQuinn:
how can you allow your in law to stay with you for a year? There will be no privacy and he will be involved into their private affairs. Would you like your in-law to be involved with you and your wife's private affairs. So what's the point of getting married then

Rossy99:
An undergraduate of polytechnic staying with us is growing wings. He doesn't help in domestic chores when hubby is away, he does when hubby is around, he Waits for us to tell him what to do before he does it and he is really making me angry which i hate to be.

When i report him to hubby, he won't do anything or even chastise him instead he complaints whenever i give him food that his food is too small. I'm not a bad type to give him little food cos i have conscience and it disturbs me wen i do bad but he is a glutton that only eats and sleeps without doing anything even to wash plates he use to eat.

What do i do?

Rossy99:
He is not even an inlaw or relative,hubby nd his father attend dsame church back den

lordkhalifa:
op u want advice right used this snipper if u were caught in the act, blame bughari