Acidosis:


You guys are now justifying the popular sayings about single moms indirectly.

Some guys will see these comments now and run faraway from single moms.

Her husband did nothing? really? What about her son? I'm sure the son paid her M.Ed fees in school.

SMH

it was her father that paid for her M.Ed fees not her fvcking husband. Mention just 1 thing her husband did for her

zeb04:
lol my dear the world has moved on from this crap.
If there is any sensible person i have seen my bros with,is the lady he's about to get married too. With a child and 1000%intact upstairs.

Although, you didn't answer my question, I'll like to ask further;

How would you feel if your sister-in-law makes this exact post public?

Acidosis:


You guys are now justifying the popular sayings about single moms indirectly.

Some guys will see these comments now and run faraway from single moms.

Her husband did nothing? really? What about her son? I'm sure the son paid her M.Ed fees in school.

SMH

no hold on.

You making it a big deal. Is she a crippled cancer patient? She has a son,so what!that disqualifies her from being a human being ?

Stop thinking it is a big deal to marry a single parent. It is not.

zeb04:
no hold on.

You making it a big deal. Is she a crippled cancer patient? She has a son,so what!that disqualifies her from being a human being ?

Stop thinking it is a big deal to marry a single parent. It is not.

As far as Nigeria is concerned, it is a big deal for a guy who has never been married to get married to a woman with a grown up son in 200L. Worst still, a lady who had her baby at age 11, who is on the other hand subject to interferences from her son's father.

I really don't like it when people come online and start acting like "all is well" on critical issues.

We all know how you all will respond if your brothers añd sons make such bold steps.

The husband deserves a huge respect, and to those folks who think her husband contributes nothing, I hope you all won't disrespect your husband, as it is rare for a Nigerian husband to sponsor her wife through school. It is always the duty of a father. A good woman will never say, because her husband didn't pay her primary school fees, he therefore deserves no respect.

Maybe she has had clashes with her husband concerning her son.. And her husband may have said one day out of anger, that she is second hand.
A friend of. Mine, she's a single mum but married to another man. She always sang praises of her son and how he will make her proud.. I then asked her one day, how about your husband, u rarely talk about him.. She said my dear, if u know what my husband had said to me in the first of rage, u will be amazed and above all he doesn't care about my first son... He takes responsibilty of his other children I had with him except the first one I had before I married him.. One day, he shouted at me and said I don't blame u woman, I blame myself for marrying a second hand woman... In the midst of neighbours trying calm him down.. She felt so ashamed of herself cos everyone thought her husband was the father of her first son.
She said her first son doesn't regard her husband as his dad.. He cried one day saying he wants to know his biological father. She went in search of the guy who impregnated her, thank God she found him, he felt remorsed for abandoning them.. He himself is also married with children, but he promised to take over his son's education and welfare..and he's doing exactly the way he promised.. That move nearly ruined her marriage but at the end, her parents came into the matter..
To cut long story short
Her first son is well take care of by his real dad without his own wife knowing he has a son elsewhere.
He also set her up in a boutique business cause her husband at home wants her to be full time housewife and shes tired staying at home.
It nearly ruined her home cos her husband was like who gave her so much money to open a biz...

In short, for me oooo I cannot be a single mum, either thru mistake or otherwise and then get married to another man? Nah.. Too many complications there..

Acidosis:
You see the problem I have with some single moms?

Your son is your life? what about your husband, no single word about him?

There's nothing inspiring about this, from my own point of view.

The story look fictional tho but its good to read stories of lessons of life.

And you have a point, most women forget to appreciate their husband, they show all their love to their children, they forget their husband still want to be loved.

Amelian:
Maybe she has had clashes with her husband concerning her son.. And her husband may have said one day out of anger, that she is second hand.
A friend of. Mine, she's a single mum but married to another man. She always sang praises of her son and how he will make her proud.. I then asked her one day, how about your husband, u rarely talk about him.. She said my dear, if u know what my husband had said to me in the first of rage, u will be amazed and above all he doesn't care about my first son... He takes responsibilty of his other children I had with him except the first one I had before I married him.. One day, he shouted at me and said I don't blame u woman, I blame myself for marrying a second hand woman... In the midst of neighbours trying calm him down.. She felt so ashamed of herself cos everyone thought her husband was the father of her first son.
She said her first son doesn't regard her husband as his dad.. He cried one day saying he wants to know his biological father. She went in search of the guy who impregnated her, thank God she found him, he felt remorsed for abandoning them.. He himself is also married with children, but he promised to take over his son's education and welfare..and he's doing exactly the way he promised.. That move nearly ruined her marriage but at the end, her parents came into the matter..
To cut long story short
Her first son is well take care of by his real dad without his own wife knowing he has a son elsewhere.
He also set her up in a boutique business cause her husband at home wants her to be full time housewife and shes tired staying at home.
It nearly ruined her home cos her husband was like who gave her so much money to open a biz...

In short, for me oooo I cannot be a single mum, either thru mistake or otherwise and then get married to another man? Nah.. Too many complications there..

Those eyes...

AuroraB:
Those eyes...

Which eyes?

Then the men should show appreciation to their children too and skip the wife

Acidosis:
You see the problem I have with some single moms?

Your son is your life? what about your husband, no single word about him?

There's nothing inspiring about this, from my own point of view.

@Bold: Maybe she meant he was her source of inspiration....because he truly is.

Acidosis:


She's a married woman, read the quote and the Topic.

She wanted us to know that in spite bn pregnant at 11, she got a man, and a M.Ed.

Unfortunately, she selfishly poured all the appreciation to her son with no single word about the man who, in spite her situation, loved her and counted her worthy enough to be a wife.

This attitude puts me off completely. It doesn't apply only to single moms though, some married women are like that.

Wanted to had this to my initial post to you.

For we wives... It is husbands before kids please.

ItsQuinn:
Her husband was no where to be found, her husband didn't contribute anything to her struggles, her husband wasn't there when she was at her worst, so why must he be recognised? Recognised for what na?

The only people that need the recognition and application is her father and her son. Shikena!

Really?

tintingz:
The story look fictional tho but its good to read stories of lessons of life.

And you have a point, most women forget to appreciate their husband, they show all their love to their children, they forget their husband still want to be loved.

Yes oo

bukatyne:


@Bold: Maybe she meant he was her source of inspiration....because he truly is.

You're absolutely right, but seeing the Topic has to do with marriage, and ME.d, I expected something thoughtful about her current family.

The topic (without the bull crap message) would have inspired many out there who see teenage pregnancy as the end of the world.

I expected to see a message like;

In spite the stigmatization I faced at age 11, I scaled through school, got married to a wonderful darling husband, etc..

That alone would have encouraged many guys who are currently in love with single moms but scared to take the relationship further due to hearsay, family issues, etc.

In fact, I was hoping to see a message against abortion or something...

Sadly, her message will scare many as she has affirmed the widespread worries of many about single moms.

Good to know she was able to get her life back on track.

About acknowledging her husband, she probably never met the guy till she had sorted her life out. Was she married while in uni? Was she already married before she started her teaching job?
I think her parents forgave her when they saw her seriousness and helped in raising her son. Let's assume her son is at most 22. She's probably just in her early 30s or late 20s.

I'm not so sure she was married while she was facing all her struggles. She was too young then anyway.
She probably never even knew her husband then. How could she talk about that trying period and then acknowledge someone who didn't even know her during that time?
That would sound like the lie it is.

Regarding single mothers, millions of Nigerian men are married to single mothers, whether divorced, widowed or even single. A lot of men see beyond that. Mariam Babangida was one. Her daughter is one, Daisy Danjuma I believe is another, Stella Damasus, this actress that recently remarried in Greece, mercy aigbe, Foluke daramola, infact too many examples. Now when we talk of the regular bloke on the streets, a lot of people on nairaland have same similar situations where their mothers remarried after having a child.
It's not a disease as someone pointed out. We have read people's stories on this same nl in similar family situations. I have relatives in similar situations.

So, life happens and we move on. That's life.
All in the pursuit of happiness.
If its the single mom that'll give you the happiness you seek, why not?

Acidosis:


You're absolutely right, but seeing the Topic has to do with marriage, and ME.d, I expected something thoughtful about her current family.

The topic (without the bull crap message) would have inspired many out there who see teenage pregnancy as the end of the world.

I expected to see a message like;

In spite the stigmatization I faced at age 11, I scaled through school, got married to a wonderful darling husband, etc..

That alone would have encouraged many guys who are currently in love with single moms but scared to take the relationship further due to hearsay, family issues, etc.

In fact, I was hoping to see a message against abortion or something...

Sadly, her message will scare many as she has affirmed the widespread worries of many about single moms.

I absolutely agree with you.

The overall message does nothing to help the cause of single parents.

bukatyne:


I absolutely agree with you.

The overall message does nothing to help the cause of single parents.

I quite disagree with you.

A lot of girls who had teenage pregnancies dropped out of school, and never made much of their lives.
She did. She's come a long way, and despite all the challenges she faced has been able to turn her life around and make the best out of a bad situation. She's raised a fine young man (of course with the help of her parents), has a job which meets her basic needs, is well educated and is in a committed relationship (nothing more serious than marriage when we talk of relationships).
She did all this by herself, she had the strenght and will power to keep going even at such a young age. Believe in yourself, never give up and when life gives you lemons make lemonade out of it.
That's a lesson I've just garnered from her life. Another important lesson lest I forget, is that of accepting responsibility for her actions. She knew she was at fault, took responsibility for her actions and paid for it. She didn't wallow in self pity when she was sent to the village, she didn't blame other people for her misfortune ( a lot of adults even on NL still do this), she didn't blame her parents, she didnt blame the boy who impregnated her, she blamed herself!, And she also knew she was the only one that could make things right. There are consequences for our actions. I hope people can see this in her story. It was rough for her.
This is equally a lesson to parents who have children that get pregnant while still teenagers. Help support them, the deed is already done and they can still make you proud. Don't throw them out to the dogs to feed on. Her parents helped raise that child to where he is now- a 200L law undergraduate. Just as intelligent as his mother. The boy looks so young like secondary school boy sef.
The present life she has now with her husband is another phase of her life, a new phase, a totally different life. She's just starting to build and form memories in that new phase. I won't be surprised if she hasn't been married for more than 2 years.
Shes still quite young in my own opinion

I think her life in this context is aimed at the joy she has now over her son. I do not think it means She loves her husband less. Naturally it is normal to be thoroughly persuaded of the worth of that person whom you suffered with. Her husband would be aware of this fact. That She just referred to her son as her life doesn't mean he is all that matters to her in reality. She is telling the story surrounding the child's birth.....so she shouldn't address him less.

I will be the biggest slowpoke to believe the part that she got pregnant at 11! Some people can LIE for Africa!!

Hardwork broght her this far

Marvel1206:


there'll alwapys be that one bad belle

plus me making two bad belle. Abeg more bad belle people should identify with us,na Wesley make the world sweet

You Bleep well!

Abeg make somebody come give me belle maybe dat go make the story of my life change to better

We thank Almighty God JEHOVAH for your repentance, redemption and restoration.

Wow! @ 11

Very interesting and encouraging story but the truth is you can't be blamed for been born poor but you will be blamed if ended poor.

Your parents only brought you to this world while the rest is in your hands(destiny).

Acidosis:


She's a married woman, read the quote and the Topic.

She wanted us to know that in spite bn pregnant at 11, she got a man, and a M.Ed.

Unfortunately, she selfishly poured all the appreciation to her son with no single word about the man who, in spite her situation, loved her and counted her worthy enough to be a wife.

This attitude puts me off completely. It doesn't apply only to single moms though, some married women are like that.

Do you know if her husband would have married her if she was still an ordinary street hawker with a kid?
She worked on herself, developed herself, made herself presentable and her parents proud of her. Her son was with her all through this not her husband. Do you expect her to put her son on a backseat to her husband?

Acidosis:


As far as Nigeria is concerned, it is a big deal for a guy who has never been married to get married to a woman with a grown up son in 200L. Worst still, a lady who had her baby at age 11, who is on the other hand subject to interferences from her son's father.

I really don't like it when people come online and start acting like "all is well" on critical issues.

We all know how you all will respond if your brothers añd sons make such bold steps.

The husband deserves a huge respect, and to those folks who think her husband contributes nothing, I hope you all won't disrespect your husband, as it is rare for a Nigerian husband to sponsor her wife through school. It is always the duty of a father. A good woman will never say, because her husband didn't pay her primary school fees, he therefore deserves no respect.

Spoken sensibly my brother .

Acidosis:
You see the problem I have with some single moms?

Your son is your life? what about your husband, no single word about him?

There's nothing inspiring about this, from my own point of view.

I thinks it natural if you notice around you

ChuzzyBlog:
[img]http://1.bp..com/-ng-XqiTpImc/V-9fCs7hNvI/AAAAAAAAC10/DXVftaHS7VsNoVwB8iVZKjD6tDqQf-aMQCLcB/s1600/13522076_1399987613351573_1692072364753228667_n.jpg[/img]

Exclusive to Chuzzyblog

This is a clear case of determination and self will. We sometimes make mistakes in life but what matters is what we make out from such mistakes. Sometimes we fall, Instead of dusting our bums and move on, we accept defeat. This Lady's story is an inspiration to all. Read below:-

[b]My story goes thus, sometime 20 years ago, I was naive and influenced by peer pressure. My dad was and is still a strict disciplinarian,mum on the other hand was a bit soft on us and let us have our way. She practically covered for and took sides with me especially (being her only daughter amongst 3 sons).

I got out of hand and starting moving with the wrong set of friends, got pregnant at age 11 (primary 5)and then my whole world crumbled. The harsh reality of life began to unfold as I had to drop out of school, I couldn't sit for my First School Leaving Certificate Examination(FSLC).

People in my neighbourhood made mockery of me my dad couldn't bare it, so he sent me out of the house and I had to go to the village to live with my grandma. In order to survive and fend for myself (as grandma isn't working) I had to summon courage and face my own devil, I knew I was the cause of my predicaments and didn't put the blame on my mum or anyone. I started street hawking selling all sorts ranging from tapioca (kpokpo garri), roasted pork meat, roasted maggots, Madiga bread, sachet water etc.

Few months later I had my baby,saved some cash (through hawking) which I used to re-enroll for my FSLC, I passed with a "merit".

Still in the street hawking business, I saw myself through secondary school, I was determined to show my folks that I truly regretted my actions and is now a serious child. Enrolled for WAEC cleared all my papers likewise my JAMB and then gained admission into the university.
When my dad saw how focused I had become, they took my child and I back, sent me off to the university and took care of my baby.

To cut the long story short, I'm now a M.ed holder from the University of Lagos State Akoka, a successful teacher and happily married by His grace. My son is currently a 200Level Law student. Strangers thinks he's my younger brother because the age gap between us is so close, and he's growing taller by the day.

My son is my life, he's the reason I am where I am today as his presence into this world made me a responsible individual. He's my victory story, he knows what I went through and is determined to make me a proud mum

[img]http://3.bp..com/-12Q8KvNvOrE/V-9gRHf9UFI/AAAAAAAAC18/sPmCFXGl0wsGKjc_SHcAStZ9BZ1cyEDrQCLcB/s1600/14224791_1466273653389635_3817349786248929430_n.jpg[/img]

#TeamUnion #Unstoppable[/b]


SOURCE: Chuzzyblog

Some ladies eeeeeeeeeeh.What on earth are you looking for in a man at 11years.Just thank your God you are telling this story alive,u are just 1 out of 1,000 survivors still out there.Feom your story,u are A product of parental guide collapse.#weakmum.
.

Which of the picture is her hubby?

dominique:


Do you know if her husband would have married her if she was still an ordinary street hawker with a kid?
She worked on herself, developed herself, made herself presentable and her parents proud of her. Her son was with her all through this not her husband . Do you expect her to put her son on a backseat to her husband?

and the grand-mom?