Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) - Romance - Nairaland
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| Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by dROC1: 11:25pm On Nov 13, 2009 |
Our relationship is almost a month old. I was really hoping she would be the one but this evening after bit of probing, I discovered that she's lost count of the number of guys she's slept with in one and a half years since she was disvirgined. She says she can remember only 10 clearly for now and I asked how it came about and she said she was just having fun and flings. She claims she loves me and that she sees something different in me and I'm the first guy she's truly loved, then I asked her how many of the 10 she told "I love you" and she couldn't speak. I had my suspicions about her being a former runs girl before now but she claimed all her friends were into the lifestyle and not her, only for me to discover today that she has been around the block too. I personally do not subscribe to casual sex as it goes against my personal beliefs. Is more than 10 sex partners over a one and half-year period normal for a decent girl or am I overeacting? Can I trust her completely or is she likely to be using me as shes been through so many guys in such a short period of time? The relationship is less than a month old and I'm still getting to know her. My intentions for this girl are genuine but I'm confused whether to go on with the relationship or to be cautious as i dont want to get myself hurt or played. Pls I need constructive advice. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Nobody: 11:45pm On Nov 13, 2009 |
Negro please. How many guys have ran through 30 girls and consider themselves decent guys? What of you? you probably ran through alot of girls and want to settle down now and you want a "good girl" Double standards or what? 1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by maedan(f): 12:03am On Nov 14, 2009 |
 there are sex partners and there are lovers  . If they were just flings maybe you should just reform her as she may just be a promiscuous female with lack of upbringing  . But if it's lovers ie men she actually fell for and dated, then brotha you better run cos she can't stick to one man. Either way you've got work to do  !!And PS, to answer your question, no, you're not safe .1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by SisiKill1: 12:29am On Nov 14, 2009 |
Pardon my ignorance but. . . Err. . . what does RUNS GIRL mean? |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by igbonla(m): 12:49am On Nov 14, 2009 |
d-ROC, No matter what advice you get here, you cannot go on a journey that your strength cannot handle. You already have doubts and the future is so unpredictable. All the best, 1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by DeepSoul(f): 1:55am On Nov 14, 2009 |
Sisi_Kill: RUNS GIRLS = GIRL WEY DEY DO RUNS Ok, lemme pity u. Runs = All dose Aristo/Sugar Daddy waka Ther4, a runs girl is sm1 who engages in such @Poster, If u were my brother, I would advise u against it But since I dont know u All I can say is "Follow ur heart". Just make sure u do an AIDS test b4 that shaa |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Pweety4me(f): 1:58am On Nov 14, 2009 |
@Poster meet me naw. . . |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Nobody: 3:03am On Nov 14, 2009 |
@poster you have been together for a month and you are talking about this girl like you want to marry her. take it easy, take your time to get to know her better. give her time to prove herself to you and see for yourself if she is worthy. there is no rush bro. take it a day at a time the fact that she has had 10guys in the last year and half shouldnt really be a concern, thats about a guy every 2months (unless she had them all at the same time). if you are looking for a ¨god fearing woman¨like almost every guy in 9ja then you are shit out of luck but since you seem open minded enough to ¨investigate¨then go with the flow. stay on your guard at all times but enjoy it all fully.dont go accusing her of anything until you are 150% sure. abi run girls dont fall in love and put their life back on track?! |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by freeview(f): 4:35am On Nov 14, 2009 |
If u genuinely love the girl,i think the best thing is to over look her past.But try and play safe with her until u see changes in her. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by CyberG: 5:59am On Nov 14, 2009 |
Anyone notice how the female posts are mostly suggesting that there is still a SNAIL in this EMPTY SHELL of a girlfriend? Look for your info, that fucking snail left a long time ago! Now, the carcass (empty shell) is what this guy is being cajoled to take a second look? Pffff! (This is not the time to be philosophical but frank, hard talk!) Look, Mr. Poster, this decision is yours but if you don't use your own independent sense, none of this advisers will help you deal with the upcoming shit you are trying to get yourself into. You are a man. . .even, say a guyman, have you bleeped 10 girls within a space of 1.5 years? Probably not or maybe you have but girls, even intuitively, know that the number of times they open their fucking yansh and pussy for a fucking dick is inversely proportional to their chances of a decent married life or relationship. It is not hard, extrapolate the data you provided into just 3 years and see how old and worn-out the pussy is already. This is what you want to t'eba ti for your life? I will wager that by the law of averages, most of the slutty advisers have done something similar or worse and only trying to help this bitch leave the ignoble and disgraceful pool of spinsters who are so frustrated that they'd eventually end up as baby momas or strippers in a fucking club hoping to continue their trade of lewdness and debauchery! 1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by lovemoi2(f): 6:35am On Nov 14, 2009 |
go for Aids test with her IF YOU BOTH ARE CLEAN THEN you can follow your heart, dont do or think about anything until that part is settled |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by dROC1: 7:53am On Nov 14, 2009 |
Thanks for your responses guys, I really appreciate them. Ebonyeyes: Contrary to what you think, I'm not your average guy who runs through lots of girls. Like I said earlier I don't encourage such a lifestyle for personal reasons. Maybe she should be with someone who shares similar values with her. I know no one is perfect but every week I uncover something bizzare about her, which I eventually overlook the next week. For instance she was formerly a lesbian(and still checks out women from time to time), She has been into runs for cash, smoked and drank, picked up guys at clubs, she dated only cultists when on campus,she told me she's had many mugus and she's been raped by one or two guys who she initially thought were mugus. Maybe because she's from a poor background she did things to send money home. I managed to deal with the fact that my dream girl may not be perfect and have all my desired qualities but nevertheless I overlooked all this. Now after yesterday's conversation, she said she could only recall 10 guys minus "some small small flings here and there"(her words), all in the past 1 and half years. She also told the whole bunch of em she loved them. She claims she's changed since last month that we started, thats why she had earlier tried to hide her lifestyle from me . Can she change her ways overnight? |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by ALAKANNI(m): 8:26am On Nov 14, 2009 |
O-Y-O. On Your Own. No matter what we advice you here you have your life to live. Just follow your heart or your mind. Good luck bros. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by dROC1: 8:38am On Nov 14, 2009 |
ALAKANNI: Thats my point exactly, I don't want to make the wrong decision that I could regret. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by MoneyRule(m): 8:54am On Nov 14, 2009 |
10 guys in 18 months?? That's like an average of 2 months per guy!! (not including the guys she can't remember "clearly"  .How can a girl not remember someone she slept with?? And then she lies about it?? Don't know man, this don't weigh right. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Nobody: 10:43am On Nov 14, 2009 |
Guy stop whining it's easy give her a chance and if she blows it you scram.That's even the part of being a man taking risks.Also don't judge someone from thier past.I've dated some runs girl and trust me some of em don't know why they got into it, and i believe in individuality that pple are and can be different if they choose to be.Cuz i don't expect pple to judge me from my past cuz the pc guru from the past and me from the future are quite different. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by dROC1: 11:22am On Nov 14, 2009 |
pc guru: I see your point. I maybe I'll give her a chance after all. Shes sent me like 20 SMS messages since yesterday, I haven't replied yet but I'm about to send her an SMS just to let her know I ain't given up yet. Now she's calling my phone, Oops. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Nobody: 11:37am On Nov 14, 2009 |
That's the spirit.Just keep her past life in consideration.Just make sure she ain't faking. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by galatico(m): 12:33pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
To be honest with you it's not safe, God knows how many guys she had sex with, without condom damn it!!! 1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by 190: 2:51pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
@poster if u have slept with her without a condom then poster im proud 2 say this ure finished~ |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by SisiKill1: 3:40pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
RUNS GIRLS are prostitutes, yes? [size=3] I swear i'm not getting it  [/size] |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Macgreat(m): 3:56pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
Sisi_Kill:  |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by atilla(m): 7:24pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
D-roc howfar seems u like this girl. I think you should take it easy with her and the more time you spend getting to know her the better. Dont rush into anything like having sex with her (unprotected sex aaaaah) or going to meet her parents and family as her boyfriend. I think you should spend more time getting to know her. Take her out to night club, drink with her, she how she behaves there, see how she behaves when she is sad, drunk, happy, has money, broke etc cause this will really let you know wether she has changed her ways or IS WILLING/TRYING to change because she has seen you. just be careful and dont wear your heart on your sleeve so u get hurt. Also treat her nice cause she has made mistakes and everyone deserves second change but ALSO be prepared to be harsh to her so she know u are not a mugu or wont try being aggressive to have her way (e.g sending messages to u until u reply her, calling u non stop) Goodluck |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by dROC1: 7:31pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
atilla: Your advice is well recieved. I'm impressed by your maturity and constructive insight in answering my question. Hope there are more nairalanders like this. 1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by chidyke77(m): 8:38pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
Make sure u go for a lab test wt her cos if she's HIV positive dats mean ur playing wt naked wire in as much as ur avoiding sex wt her. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by touchmeder: 8:54pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
Poster are you sure u are a Nigerian man? I find this your attitude strange not that i condemn it though. stay safe sha. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by ProAnti: 9:21pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
d-ROC:She still checks out women?? atilla:Good advice! |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by ProAnti: 9:25pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
I'd advise you use her as a case study on the after-life of runz-girlz. If she turns a new leaf, then you can go on with the relation ship. If she goes back to her ways, then you've got nothing to lose as you would have learnt some good lessons that will help you later on. But a note of warning: Show her love but dont attempt to sleep with her- See how she reacts to this. 1 Like |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by oYaTo(m): 10:11pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
@cyberG I too gbadun ur yarns jare . .ur post was spot on except 4 d last paragraph tho  @poster No one can really tell you what to do, the choice is yours. As CyberG correctly said, women intuitively know that the chances of getting a good husband reduces as their promiscuity increases. And for her not to remember most of her sex partners? C'mon! That's a deal breaker in my own book. Again the choice is yours.  >10 men in 1.5yrs this one pass olympic athlete o |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Czarskit(m): 10:28pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
The Real Question here is "Are you willing to die for |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by OAM4J: 10:57pm On Nov 14, 2009 |
Think you can give her a chance, watch how she behaves in the next couple of months…. but if u must do it….(that is if you are not already doing it) use condom and both of you should do HIV test b4 getting married. |
| Re: Dating A Runs Girl (am I Safe?) by Alxmyr(m): 2:40am On Nov 15, 2009 |
Ignore all those insinuating she might have contacted HIV. Most runs girls are more careful than that. Now to the issue at hand. One month is too short to truly know somebody. So take your time with her. I find her telling you all these about her past very interesting, many will not bother. Moreover, it seems she got deflowered like one and half year ago, then libido can still be under control. She might be under the influence of peer presure. I will suggest you see to it that she change her group of friends, give her a chance to proof her worth to you. Cheers. |
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