bennyann:


Do you expect sex from every lady you help?

Pls ask him, if every lady he gives something to must reciprocate with sex, what happens to the males, do they also...

analice107:

Lol. Am not here to argue with you. You are free to have your own opinions opposed to mind, but i speak as a result of what have observed around me.

Sis, we are here talking about churched folks o, not the unchurched and definitely not bad guys. Bad guys? Why will i even want to keep the company of someone i consider bad, whatever that means?


I said, as a lady don't give out TOO MUCH OF YOURSELF. this has nothing to do with low self-esteem or narcissism. Be yaself and let him know that you a treasure and he'll be blessed to have you.

Lol
You don't have to let him know. Treasures don't need to announce themselves. They just BE.
Men, they are good treasure hunters, especially in this time and age where the so called treasures are in extinction. lol
As long as you are with the one who is meant for you, trust me, your treasuriness will ooze. You will find that you really don't have to do anything special.
It is not only we women that can sniff out wheat from chaff when it comes to men. They can too.
Once a man knows that he has found the treasure, he will move gibraltar nd everest together, if that is what it takes to keep you.

Also, let me share this here.
back in the days when I was forming guy I never liked being the one to call first in the morning. I always liked being called and stuff.
My dear, with this my Oga ehn, I troway that attitude. I didn't even know how I dropped it, but I found that it become like a ritual for me to wake him up with plenty plenty praises and petting.

I think my change in attitude was spurred by my friend's words to me. he said....Be the change you want to see in your relationship or in any area of your life for that matter. Before you know it, he will unconsciously start behaving that way. It is important to let love lead, and please while letting love lead, do not lose your sense of self.
Thank you for having me here, Bennyann.
It's been a long time since I spoke on relationships on this platform.

limamintruth:


Good questions bro.
The irony of it all is a lot of the supposedly 'good/godly' girls tend to have certain attitudes that often prevent good guys from approaching them for relationship.

For instance, some tend to be so judgemental, unfriendly, and extremely reserved; thereby unintentionally sending away prospective suitors who did mean well.

Thus, being a godly lady doesn't just mean being religious, but it also means relating well with every person one comes across with utmost humility, kindness & respect.

You haven't even approached yet, but you already know she's judgemental.

What i think is perception. Your own lifestyle may be judging you by the way you perceive the sister. You, from distance have observed her and has seen she's too good for you, godly speaking, so you just stand away and walk off thinking, she wont accept me. Maybe if you had approached you'd discovered differently.
Shakespeare says "There is no act to find a mind's construction in the face".

Approach first.

analice107:

Was just kidding. gerrarahia. which man will take that nonsense from me? because some strange character predicted the end of the world, which didn't even believe, i will tell a man to put off his wedding? Na wao.

Hahahahahahahahaha

I actually thought you were serious then cuz you were discussing with a fellow Christian although it sounded strange

randomperson:

Good Christian girls don't always end up with good men, whether early or late..... Even the ones who marry pastors

Correct. The reason is, we mostly get spiritually insensitive and laxed when it comes to who to marry. We just believe that, as long as he is a believer, he's good. But the case might be true. Compatibility is key.

analice107:

You satisfying his needs which may include having sex with him?

By the special grace of God, I will be the last person to do that if we aren't married. I think I've been misunderstood.

Besides, I said the man who is worthy of it.

For example, I carry on my natural hair, meaning it isn't relaxed. I wouldn't want someone from nowhere to just tell me he wants it relaxed. I will only listen to the man who is worthy of it. The man I know who has earned me sacrificing those little things that aren't against God.

For now I wouldn't want to do those things but for that particular person's sake I can decide to change because he deserves it. Mind you, this person I'm talking about will be someone who fears God.

I've seen those who are Godly asking me to relax my hair but I felt they aren't qualified to ask that of me so I ignore. When I tell them I'm waiting for my man to tell me that before I do it, they laugh at me.

So you see, these are the little things I can do for the one for me as long as they're not unpleasant to God.

MizMyColi:


Lol
You don't have to let him know. Treasures don't need to announce themselves. They just BE.
Men, they are good treasure hunters, especially in this time and age where the so called treasures are in extinction. lol
As long as you are with the one who is meant for you, trust me, your treasuriness will ooze. You will find that you really don't have to do anything special.
It is not only we women that can sniff out wheat from chaff when it comes to men. They can too.
Once a man knows that he has found the treasure, he will move gibraltar nd everest together, if that is what it takes to keep you.

Also, let me share this here.
back in the days when I was forming guy I never liked being the one to call first in the morning. I always liked being called and stuff.
My dear, with this my Oga ehn, I troway that attitude. I didn't even know how I dropped it, but I found that it become like a ritual for me to wake him up with plenty plenty praises and petting.

I think my change in attitude was spurred by my friend's words to me. he said....Be the change you want to see in your relationship or in any area of your life for that matter. Before you know it, he will unconsciously start behaving that way. It is important to let love lead, and please while letting love lead, do not lose your sense of self.
Thank you for having me here, Bennyann.
It's been a long time since I spoke on relationships on this platform.

You're making me love you more and I appreciate you the more.

I like the bolded. And also while letting love lead, I will in the process not lose my sense of self, that I have to make sure of

I need a hugging emoji.... Seun

MizMyColi:


Moderation is key.
You should know that more oft, there is a thinline between godliness and being fanatically godly. Call it fanatical godliness if you may.

Dear Bennyan.

I will share something I consider personal with you.

....I surrendered.
I asked Jesus and our Father to take control of my life.
I knew very well that I wasn't always getting it right. I was well aware of my weaknesses, but still I would talk to my father about these things and I was convinced within the core of my spirit that it would end in praise for me.

I used to sing a song then -- "My hope is built on Nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness (not my righteousness nor my godliness )" I also used to pray by saying--- "Abba, for all you have prepared for me, prepare me; for that which I do not see, show me; for that which I do not know, teach me. Call me back again and again till I can no longer stray from the eternal lesson of absolute dependence on you.

Hmmm, Maybe you mean "zeal" without knowledge, because there's nothing like fanatical godliness.

You are either godly or you are not.

bennyann:


By the special grace of God, I will be the last person to do that if we aren't married. I think I've been misunderstood.

Besides, I said the man who is worthy of it.

For example, I carry on my natural hair, meaning it isn't relaxed. I wouldn't want someone from nowhere to just tell me he wants it relaxed. I will only listen to the man who is worthy of it. The man I know who has earned me sacrificing those little things that aren't against God.

For now I wouldn't want to do those things but for that particular person's sake I can decide to change because he deserves it. Mind you, this person I'm talking about will be someone who fears God.

I've seen those who are Godly asking me to relax my hair but I felt they aren't qualified to ask that of me so I ignore. When I tell them I'm waiting for my man to tell me that before I do it, they laugh at me.

So you see, these are the little things I can do for the one for me as long as they're not unpleasant to God.

Ok.

analice107:

My glorious sister. Most of us have lost the essence of marriage. And am not talking about the unchurched here, i mean the churched folks. We now marry becos we are of marrying age, or we need a man to assist us financially or we need OUR OWN FAMILIES.

How many Christian ladies even know why God the originator of marriage constituted marriage in the first place?

How many of us know why God created sex? Do we even know the significance of Sexual intercourse?

Do we know that sex is fellowship? Do we know that sex is work and God sees it as evangelism?

When i got this revelation, i stopped worrying about marriage. I will marry, and my marrying will be for God before myself.


It is fractured knowledge, distorted information and misplaced priorities that has brought us to where we are today as believers.

We do everything for the wrong reasons.

How many believers even know what purpose is? They just want to escape fornication and just marry anyone who shows up. The trend nowadays is marrying men who can not even buy their own wedding suits. They either marry money or marry paupers, no more purpose.

Check, the Single godly ladies are those who know their purpose on earth. Am not talking about those who have misused their time running around and are now in church hoping God will turn the hand of time. I mean the ones who grew up fervent in Christ, they all have vision and purpose and are resolute to do God's Will here.

Today, am still single because i won't and Can't marry a man whose aspirations in life does not include God. And am ready to die single if that is what it will take to do God's Will. But, i will be gloriously married and my husband shall be my king.

A big 'AMEN' to the bolded.

hopefulLandlord:


Hahahahahahahahaha

I actually thought you were serious then cuz you were discussing with a fellow Christian although it sounded strange

My dear, even if i been know true true say Jesus go come tomorrow, i go marry today. At least make i no just go heaven without emm you know?

After i don hold body tire, na him sombory go tell me say, no marry Jesus dey come tomorrow, me i go listen to am? Nooooo. At least one night with my king will suffice.

Pidgin2:



How did I miss this lovely post by my friend and sister in Christ, bennyann.

My dear, this world is a funny place. Most bad girls end up with a husband and kids, fact. As for good girls most times this is not the case.

The ruler of this world is the devil. The bible says we wrestle against so many unseen entities and whether we like it or not these beings operate through people who you discuss with on a daily basis.

Therefore the evil one knows your thoughts and will definitely try to frustrate you. Forget about strategies my dear our weapon is not canal

I can only recommend three things: prayers, patience and faith.

It might take years and challenges may come but God willing the lines will fall in good places, it shall surely end in praise

Hmmm! I knew I will get something to tap from you, especially the bolded.

Thank you dearest. It shall surely end in praise

MizMyColi:


Lol
You don't have to let him know. Treasures don't need to announce themselves. They just BE.
Men, they are good treasure hunters, especially in this time and age where the so called treasures are in extinction. lol
As long as you are with the one who is meant for you, trust me, your treasuriness will ooze. You will find that you really don't have to do anything special.
It is not only we women that can sniff out wheat from chaff when it comes to men. They can too.
Once a man knows that he has found the treasure, he will move gibraltar nd everest together, if that is what it takes to keep you.

Also, let me share this here.
back in the days when I was forming guy I never liked being the one to call first in the morning. I always liked being called and stuff.
My dear, with this my Oga ehn, I troway that attitude. I didn't even know how I dropped it, but I found that it become like a ritual for me to wake him up with plenty plenty praises and petting.

I think my change in attitude was spurred by my friend's words to me. he said....Be the change you want to see in your relationship or in any area of your life for that matter. Before you know it, he will unconsciously start behaving that way. It is important to let love lead, and please while letting love lead, do not lose your sense of self.
Thank you for having me here, Bennyann.
It's been a long time since I spoke on relationships on this platform.

Oh, lol, letting him know must not be by you telling him you are a treasure nah. Who does that?

See? this is exactly what am trying to say but not finding the right words. "WHILE LETTING LOVE LEAD, DO NOT LOSE YOUR SENSE OF SELF".

analice107:

My dear, even if i been know true true say Jesus go come tomorrow, i go marry today. At least make i no just go heaven without emm you know?

After i don hold body tire, na him sombory go tell me say, no marry Jesus dey come tomorrow, me i go listen to am? Nooooo. At least one night with my king will suffice.

This is just hilarious
Nice thread bennyann. Learning a lot.

CatfishBilly:

This is just hilarious
Nice thread bennyann. Learning a lot.

Na true nah. You know how many hot guys i don close eyes, bite my teeth waka pass?

you see, in heaven there shall be no sex, but am still here, at least for one night. I go declare vigil try meet up before proceeding to heaven.

analice107:

Na true nah. You know how many hot guys i don close eyes, bite my teeth waka pass?

you see, in heaven there shall be no sex, but am still here, at least for one night. I go declare vigil try meet up before proceeding to heaven.

Onye nwe anyi ga agba gi ume (Our Lord will give you strength)

Good to know that there are God fearing ladies right here..Keep it up and wait on the Lord.
May the Lord bless us all with a God fearing spouse.

CatfishBilly:
Onye nwe anyi ga agba gi ume (Our Lord will give you strength)

Amen ooo.

analice107:

My glorious sister. Most of us have lost the essence of marriage. And am not talking about the unchurched here, i mean the churched folks. We now marry becos we are of marrying age, or we need a man to assist us financially or we need OUR OWN FAMILIES.

How many Christian ladies even know why God the originator of marriage constituted marriage in the first place?

How many of us know why God created sex? Do we even know the significance of Sexual intercourse?

Do we know that sex is fellowship? Do we know that sex is work and God sees it as evangelism?

When i got this revelation, i stopped worrying about marriage. I will marry, and my marrying will be for God before myself.


It is fractured knowledge, distorted information and misplaced priorities that has brought us to where we are today as believers.

We do everything for the wrong reasons.

How many believers even know what purpose is? They just want to escape fornication and just marry anyone who shows up. The trend nowadays is marrying men who can not even buy their own wedding suits. They either marry money or marry paupers, no more purpose.

Check, the Single godly ladies are those who know their purpose on earth. Am not talking about those who have misused their time running around and are now in church hoping God will turn the hand of time. I mean the ones who grew up fervent in Christ, they all have vision and purpose and are resolute to do God's Will here.

Today, am still single because i won't and Can't marry a man whose aspirations in life does not include God. And am ready to die single if that is what it will take to do God's Will. But, i will be gloriously married and my husband shall be my king.

Analice107,
Sister, I am honored to be speaking with you for the first time! I know you are a veteran contributor in this section...
It's nice to be able to speak with other Christian sisters here in the Religion S...which is what I had wanted.
I was kinda frustrated cause there were so few ladies willing to speak in here.
Anyhow, I totally get what you're saying. This marriage thing is no joke.
You know I took a very quick detour over to the Romance Section a few days ago (to view what my "brother" had written (in regards to me) as a reply to someone on one of his threads)...and I ran across a topic about a guy that had stated he is "26" & a married prophetess who is "41" allegedly wanted him...and he wanted advice on what to do.
He actually called the woman "elderly"!!! Elderly @ "41"! I wasn't offended at all...I just laughed so hard! That was so hilarious! I had to actually call my real, blood brother to tell him. He thought that was hilarious too and then proceeded to tell me why he thought the guy said it (which i won't say cause it would be offensive....and the reason why I don't want to tell my real brother the name of this website...cause if he joins NL...then I won't be able to tame him and he'll embarass me daily. He's the type who will put his real name out and then tell everyone I'm his sister).
Anyhow, back to the subject though...see stuff like that obviously has been ingrained in Nigerians from childhood..hence the reason young ladies rush into marriage (regardless of whether it's a God ordained match...although one doesn't have to be my age before marrying). Although I'm half Nigerian, I grew up in the U.S...so that pressure wasn't on me. Guess who gave me the most grief? Some of my dad"s Nigerian family --my uncle"s wife-- & his Nigerian friends who live in the U.S.!!
But at this point, I'm so, so at peace....not obsessive or impatient....just at peace and living my life.
I like what you said though about being married to your king

MZLady39:



Analice107,
Sister, I am honored to be speaking with you for the first time! I know you are a veteran contributor in this section...
It's nice to be able to speak with other Christian sisters here in the Religion S...which is what I had wanted.
I was kinda frustrated cause there were so few ladies willing to speak in here.
Anyhow, I totally get what you're saying. This marriage thing is no joke.
You know I took a very quick detour over to the Romance Section a few days ago (to view what my "brother" had written (in regards to me) as a reply to someone on one of his threads)...and I ran across a topic about a guy that had stated he is "26" & a married prophetess who is "41" allegedly wanted him...and he wanted advice on what to do.
He actually called the woman "elderly"!!! Elderly @ "41"! I wasn't offended at all...I just laughed so hard! That was so hilarious! I had to actually call my real, blood brother to tell him. He thought that was hilarious too and then proceeded to tell me why he thought the guy said it (which i won't say cause it would be offensive....and the reason why I don't want to tell my real brother the name of this website...cause if he joins NL...then I won't be able to tame him and he'll embarass me daily. He's the type who will put his real name out and then tell everyone I'm his sister).
Anyhow, back to the subject though...see stuff like that obviously has been ingrained in Nigerians from childhood..hence the reason young ladies rush into marriage (regardless of whether it's a God ordained match...although one doesn't have to be my age before marrying). Although I'm half Nigerian, I grew up in the U.S...so that pressure wasn't on me. Guess who gave me the most grief? Some of my dad"s Nigerian family --my uncle"s wife-- & his Nigerian friends who live in the U.S.!!
But at this point, I'm so, so at peace....not obsessive or impatient....just at peace and living my life.
I like what you said though about being married to your king

Hahahahahahaha, i laughed so loud "@the41yrs elderly woman" hmmm, i can understand why a 26 year old man in Nigeria will call a lady of 41 elderly. Here in Nigeria, a 30yrs old man is still a boy living with his parents, so a 26yr old is indeed a child.

Being a serious minded Christian who will want to love God and follow the rules is really tough here. Even some "Christian" friends who soft peddle on these things, make you look fanatical.

Now they look at me go, " Just marry and change him". Marry and change him? Am the woman, the one who is suppose to submit to a man, i should be the one taking orders from him, am the one who shd treat him as my king, his words shd be law to me. Now, how do i at the same time submit to a man and change him?

Submitting means doing as he says and as he pleases, for that is what God says, so to bend him to follow me will mean, him doing my wishes instead of me his?

I asked one of my Christian friend who married a divorcee and was pregnant 5months into her wedding,, she told me to accept a certain unchurched fellow becos, to her time is gone and he is rich, to give me tips on how she changed her hubby, yet she's crying everyday and wants to run out of that marriage by all means

One told me, babes, i envy you ooo it's better to be single than to be in what i am in. Her hubby leaves the house for months without a word to her, he will suddenly appear without any warning.

she said, i wish it's easy, i would've just left this marriage.
One Christian friend went to the point of throwing away her Christian faith and married q Jehovah's Witness.

analice107:

My dear, even if i been know true true say Jesus go come tomorrow, i go marry today. At least make i no just go heaven without emm you know?
.

So una dey think of sex bah?

St. Matthew 5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

And when you find yourself, in the real act in dreams now, you will come here to say wet dream is "demonic".

analice107:

After i don hold body tire, na him sombory go tell me say, no marry Jesus dey come tomorrow, me i go listen to am? Nooooo. At least one night with my king will suffice.

One night will not sister. Except the king didn't measure up.

akintom:

So una dey think of sex bah?

St. Matthew 5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

And when you find yourself, in the real act in dreams now, you will come here to say wet dream is "demonic".




One night will not sister. Except the king didn't measure up.

Oga Akintom, sexual urges are physiologic, anybody that says otherwise is just deceiving themselves.
No come derail this sweet thread.
I'm enjoying it.

CatfishBilly:

Oga Akintom, sexual urges are physiologic, anybody that says otherwise is just deceiving themselves.
No come derail this sweet thread.
I'm enjoying it.

Noooooo... Derail kwa !
Just amused that our holy ghost filled sisters, do entertain sexual thoughts too.

analice107:

Na true nah. You know how many hot guys i don close eyes, bite my teeth waka pass?

you see, in heaven there shall be no sex, but am still here, at least for one night. I go declare vigil try meet up before proceeding to heaven.

You dont listen, that is your problem

There will be sex in heaven, PLENTY of HOT SEX in heaven, kajiko?

SEX yafun yafun in heaven!

analice107:

You haven't even approached yet, but you already know she's judgemental.

What i think is perception. Your own lifestyle may be judging you by the way you perceive the sister. You, from distance have observed her and has seen she's too good for you, godly speaking, so you just stand away and walk off thinking, she wont accept me. Maybe if you had approached you'd discovered differently.
Shakespeare says "There is no act to find a mind's construction in the face".

Approach first.

First of all, the issue I raised isn't personally about me, but certain instances I've witnessed happen to people I know in the past. And it involved men who did approach some church sisters in different occassions but were not given any chance simply because they were not considered religious enough. I explained that a bit further in my second reply to the OP.

Secondly, I am in no way trying to castigate my sisters, but I deemed it vital to share the message here as it may be helpful to someone out there.

MrPresident1:


You dont listen, that is your problem

There will be sex in heaven, PLENTY of HOT SEX in heaven, kajiko?

SEX yafun yafun in heaven!

There is too holy for that
In heaven sexual satisfaction doesn't go with action , it only goes with mind so as to be acceptable
Don't tell me omnipresent will be pleased watching porn in his virgin world
Cos sex in heaven is same as fornication, it has no purpose apart satisfaction, though some religion allows that maybe u should join that particular one

limamintruth:


First of all, the issue I raised isn't personally about me, but certain instances I've witnessed happen to people I know in the past. And it involved men who did approach some church sisters in different occassions but were not given any chance simply because they were not considered religious enough. I explained that a bit further in my second reply to the OP.

Secondly, I am in no way trying to castigate my sisters, but I deemed it vital to share the message here as it may be helpful to someone out there.

Well, i think it's ignorance that will make a sister judge a brother by appearance and write him off.

Truth is, some sisters over do it. There's no way you can know a real man by just looking at him. Appearance is not the man.

Am not that stringent. Yes, i won't compromise, but am friendly. Am open to discussions, i can sit out in a descent place, a guy can visit me, i can serve him food if he cares for it. Just friendship. There's nothing wrong in being a friend.

God reveals things to me before they happen, especially when it has to do with any man around me. I know if i dare allow my emotions get too involved, i won't see. So, i keep clear.

analice107:

Well, i think it's ignorance that will make a sister judge a brother by appearance and write him off.

Truth is, some sisters over do it. There's no way you can know a real man by just looking at him. Appearance is not the man.

Am not that stringent. Yes, i won't compromise, but am friendly. Am open to discussions, i can sit out in a descent place, a guy can visit me, i can serve him food if he cares for it. Just friendship. There's nothing wrong in being a friend.

God reveals things to me before they happen, especially when it has to do with any man around me. I know if i dare allow my emotions get too involved, i won't see. So, i keep clear.

True.

MrPresident1:


You dont listen, that is your problem

There will be sex in heaven, PLENTY of HOT SEX in heaven, kajiko?

SEX yafun yafun in heaven!

Not in Jesus's heaven. Maybe you have your own heaven. And, pls don't come in here with those your doctrines, they wear me off. Biko, allow me enjoy my peace here.

analice107:

Not in Jesus's heaven. Maybe you have your own heaven. And, pls don't come in here with those your doctrines, they wear me off. Biko, allow me enjoy me peace here.

Heheheheheh

And Angels will make sure everyone drops his/her diccck/puna b4 entering heaven

obinna58:

Heheheheheh

And Angels will make sure everyone drops his/her diccck/puna b4 entering heaven

No, no need to.drop anything, we shall just be changed. New bodies shall be given to us. We shall be sexles, like the Angels. When you see us, you'd be wondering if we were males or females.

analice107:

No, no need to.drop anything, we shall just be changed. New bodies shall be given to us. We shall be sexles, like the Angels. When you see us, you'd be wondering if we were males or females.

u really like it that way