I need ur advice,  am in a dilemma- in a rlship wit a chic to die 4, unfortunately i dont love her while she's obsessed with me. D challenge is i plan 2settle down in 3yrs -God willin, she says she can wait but i cant commit myself.  Each time i try to break-up her eyes swell wit tears & she says all dis sweet nonsense enough to make my heart melt.
I cant bear to see her cry so i end up lying to her-tellin her words she needs to hear,whilst prayin she finds sum1 dat trully loves her.

emotional blackmail? what the fuccckk? is that the term you should use for a lady that is showing you love? when you were fuckkking her, was emotional blackmail involved. some of you men are just bloody numbskulls.
just call her and tell her you dont love her and you do not have any intention marrying here. quick and simple. she is only crying because you are breaking up with her uisng an offence she has committed in the past. if you tell her point blank that you dont know her, she will get the message and leave.

@chemali
u dont get it- i'll b abroad 4 next 3yrs and she wants commitment i.e "introduction", cant tie her down like dat. Distance kills love.

you are explaining better. do not do any introduction and be careful during this period so that she does not get pregnant before you leave. long distance only works if you love your woman, if you dont, it is nothing but a waste of time.

Wait a min, You make it sound like your being chained into accepting her. . .huh?

@thoniaslim
duh! Dats y i started d thread- i cant stand bein d source/cause of her pain.

You should have thought abt that before getting involved with her in the first place!

when you know that you're traveling, why did you still went on making a relationship with her. if u love this girl try and help her becuase she loves you and she is ready to die for you. i have seen a sitution like this, but the boy travelled and came back to marry the girl. i know that your fear is if she will be faithfull before your return. just try and trust her.

pls dont marry out of pity,tell her u wont be back till next 10yrs and see if she wont stop crying and sorts herself out.

@post[b]
am i the only who read that this guy said he DIDNT love the girl anymore?![/b]

there is nothing wrong with falling out of love and there is nothing wrong with being honest with someone and telling them whats the deal.
what she's doing IS emotional blackmail because she is FORCING him into staying with her against his will (he is a weak man unfortunately) but what she has to understand is that the guy is not staying with her because he loves her but just because he is FEELING SORRY for her. what woman would want that?!

@poster
before you leave for the 3yrs, you should definitely break up with this girl and move on with your life.
to make it easier on the both of you, i suggest you loose all contact with her as well (no need to give her false hope that there might be a chance of reconciliation).

mr brown i heard dat 2.

why z ery1 nt oblivious 2 d fact dat he saes he DOESNT LOVE HER NOMORE.
gzzzz drs no point even talking distance kills love,kuz he saes he loves her not.
Stop lyin to her,tel her the truth ur hurting her more by not teling her wat she needs 2 hear-THE TRUTH-n not wat she wants to hear-THE LIES.
Ery1 cries once in a whyl,bt has to move on sooner or later.

or beta still email her this thread.

ps dnt tel her ur breaking up kuz ov d distance,tel her d damn truth.
I DNT LOVE U NO MORE.
kapish

Breaking up wit her is easier said dan done-she just got out of a hurtful one and i was her rebound, i feel she's on her last straw & might be suicidal, i fear 4 her.

come off it.
stop makin excuses for her
u dnt love her
you cant love her the way she deserves
forget her crocodile tears
break it up joh
msthciuuuuuuuuuu
no one said it would be easy
she wont be d frst to be demoralized by a brkup
siifu

@poster
abeg since ur babe is "to die for" give me her details now, i could be the guy of her dreams.

follow your heart bro.

7days prayer and fasting

Stop fu.c.king her then.

@ebonyeye5
wu sed i was f**kin her

we onli make sweetmusic

snthesis:

Breaking up wit her is easier said dan done-she just got out of a hurtful one and i was her rebound, i feel she's on her last straw & might be suicidal, i fear 4 her.

awwww how cute
generally when a guy doesn't like a girl anymore, and is too much of a WUSS to break up with her, he becomes an asshole to her until she eventually breaks it off herself. u kno this way, in her mind, she'll feel that she broke up with u rather than the other way round.

but what do u mean by "each time i try to break up her eyes swell up with tears" ? how have u been trying to break up with her and how many times have u tried it?  u must have been doing it very wrongly if she still doesn't get the message.

Dude, its no sin to get involved with anyone and then not wanting to continue. . . You get involved to get to know them and if they're not fit for purpose, u tell them straight up!
There's no gain in sticking around out of pity. . . Tell her she is not what u need right now and move on. . . Trust me, she wont think twice if u flip the table round!!

Wisen up

You don't love her? Tell her straight up.
She is a big gal I'm sure she can handle the truth better than
the lies you feeding her with. At least be man enough to be
upfront with her in order for her to move on with her life. You owe
that much. . . . . . . . . . . . .

well 190 has gat nothing to say in this issue~

@oyinda
picture dis scenario
she: i love u so much baby- wish we cud stay like dis forever
me: (slight hesitation) doubt dat
she: y baby, wots wrong baby, dont u luv me, its happening all over again but u promised neva to hurt me u, u r just like d rest of them, u want to break my heart (she starts cryin)
me: (swallows hard) u knw i do luv u
she :  luv u baby, u r my world,   - , so wen ar u meeting my parents/
me: (yawa gas), em, i nid to use d toilet.

snthesis:

@oyinda
picture dis scenario
she: i love u so much baby- wish we cud stay like dis forever
me: (slight hesitation) doubt dat
she: y baby, wots wrong baby, dont u luv me, its happening all over again but u promised neva to hurt me u, u r just like d rest of them, u want to break my heart (she starts cryin)
me: (swallows hard) u knw i do luv u
she : luv u baby, u r my world, - , so wen ar u meeting my parents/
me: (yawa gas), em, i nid to use d toilet.

uhm, in her mind she has found a man of her dreams,

but you are wicked .

why do u have to lead her on and on until this moment? you said it urself dat she just got out of heartbreak

i bet if u had told her earlier on the pain would have been less for her to bear.

i feel sorry for her really

pinky lady:

uhm, in her mind she has found a man of her dreams,

but you are wicked .

why do u have to lead her on and on until this moment? you said it urself dat she just got out of heartbreak

i bet if u had told her earlier on the pain would have been less for her to bear.

i feel sorry for her really

i know it sounds wicked but u need to understand i had plans b4 i met her, and it wud be evil if i tell her to wait 4me (3yrs), wen anytin cud happen.

snthesis:

i know it sounds wicked but u need to understand i had plans b4 i met her, and it wud be evil if i tell her to wait 4me (3yrs), wen anytin cud happen.

the earlier u tell her the better for her

@poster tym z of d essence havent u told d TRUTH yet, ?
ur complicatin isues by prolonging it.

N BTW
she aint gonna comit no suicide,if she is a 2 die 4 chik,she shud understand that she kud get ny oda guy she wants.

I stopped pickin her calls & replyin her texts wen i started dis thread, only to get a msg 2nite dats she's in d hospital and needs me,

OMGGG just go to the hospital n see her. just because ur not romantically interested doesn't mean u can't be her friend, esp. in time of need. haaa

just tell her u want to be just good friends.