Bros u are over 40 u still never marry.

Infidelity
My worse fear in marriage..
Can forgive, bht the love can't be the same again.

This is why one woman let her husband and son molest a young girl till death to protect her marriage and avoid gossips like this. Why I don't support divorce for flimsy reasons making people to cling to their marriage against all odds because of what society will say is so wrong and have many evil consequences.

Toks2008:


I have my peculiar way of choosing my titles and most times I choose very controversial ones but only those who are intelligent enough not to judge the book by its cover will grasp the message.

Sir, are you in any way suggesting that the memories1 of a babe you're replying is not intelligent enough?

Marriage is all about choice, build your dream and rinse your mind of undesirable procreation.

TSOM:
God doesn't - and wouldn't - choose a partner for you. He already gave you (and us) the power of choice, of freewill. Ruining or building a relationship is entirely your (man's) decision.

God acts through us using our intellect to help us make choices. In as much as we have freewill and power of choice, if such will and power are exercised without recourse to him we end up with poo. We still need God to make our choices, me need to make those choices using his lens.

Omotayor123:

True!
I pray God choose the right partner for us. our flesh and bones insha Allah!

it's not about an effing right partner.. Are you a right partner to your would-be partner... What OP said is true... Once l pity a girl and marry her and she gives me the slightest headache... hhmmmmm!

TheUmbra:
Toks2008 at it again! Like me you'd never sacrifice truth for convenience.

You've spoken the truth. There're two types of people who would oppose your view as expressed in your article, one for each gender.

Most guys that would oppose your views here were either brought up by their moms or they have an abusive father. And they've come to hate the male folk and everything that seems to associate with their authority and advantage.

The other group are feminists from the female gender who may hate men for the same reason stated earlier.

But their views have no influence on reality. Once a woman was once married and steps out of her marriage in the name of divorce, there's only one thing in the mind of the average man - she's second hand.

To be controversial, I would argue the same goes for men, to a lesser degree...

I remember a previously divorced male friend who had to convince the family of the 2nd fiancée greatly that he wasn't about to leave their daughter in the lurch despite the divorce being clearly the result of the 1st wife's misdemeanours!!!

So there's a consequence. Male or female... Simply worse for the females given the Naija society!!!





*******

To the comment about a 42yr old woman developing hypertension.... And the bla bla about women feeling lonely...
Times are changing...

Women are becoming more accepting of a life of solitude.. They get involved in other stuff outside of work. The occasional sweetboy ministration if the mechanical 'friend' is getting boring..

With spermbanks, co-parenting websites, becoming widely available, she gets a baby alongside, if she so desires without the shackles of a man breathing down her neck...

So the game is changing, brothers... We're being rapidly influenced by information on SM.. If it obtains elsewhere, it's a matter of time before it infiltrates our society..

Denmark remains a case study!!

.





.

Divay22:
Infidelity
My worse fear in marriage..
Can forgive, bht the love can't be the same again.

LMAO

You know why I'm laughing? When do you start counting your infidelity? Most of us are already cheating our marriage mates even before marriage.

So you better warm up to the reality. Infidelity, should not be your worst fear.

@Toks2008

I don't agree with you that a woman should continually forgive and endure any issues that come up in their marriage.

A cheating spouse, maybe, but a spouse that's beats his wife regularly nko? She should continue to endure till he kills her one day or she does the killing in self defence, simply because the society doesn't favour divorced women??

Smh

I plan to marry before I clock 30, But I need at least 30 million naira in my account before I get married




Hmm.......make that 60m, perhaps 90m






Nice goal I think, should I increase it a bit, well it's not a must to Marry anyways, i will try & see wether I can become a sage if I remain a virgin till 40. well, whatever,

claseek:
@Toks2008

I don't agree with you that a woman should continually forgive and endure any issues that come up in their marriage.

A cheating spouse, maybe, but a spouse that's beats his wife regularly nko? She should continue to endure till he kills her one day or she does the killing in self defence, simply because the society doesn't favour divorced women??

Smh

Go back and read again from start to finish.

Toks2008:


Go back and read again from start to finish.

I did please

ednut1:
Bros u are over 40 u still never marry.

Yet he keeps posting threads on marriage like he has first hand, real life experience, when he doesn't.

Very mediocre and myopic threads (threads lacking in foresight and intellectual insight)

His writing ability seems to have slightly improved over the years though, his write ups were often full of grammatical & spelling errors.

The guy just comes across as a bitter man with a grudge against women in practically all his threads, I think because of a failed relationship.

With the more likes he gets, he becomes bolder at putting out mediocrity and an unexposed mindset.

claseek:
I did please

I guess you skipped this part...

"

Marriage is more spiritual than physical and nothing gladdens the Devil more than seeing marriages crumble since it is the very institution GOD meticulously established so it is your duty as a lady to guard your marriage and the only logical reason for you to leave your marriage is if your life is seriously threatened...any other reason can be worked out. No matter how many times you change men,there will always be a reason to leave so stop running about and make your marriage work."

Toks2008:


Go back and read again from start to finish.

I'll let the subtle shade slide.

However, I did not see where you excused domestic violence as a reason for separation. You just spoke about separation / divorce in general term.

Lastly before I forget, I hope you know its not all separation that stems from the wife? S
There are possibly some times a woman is willing to make it work but the husband just wants to leave. Yeah?

But I agree that in Nigeria divorce is less favorable on a woman than a man.

Toks2008:


I guess you skipped this part...

"

Marriage is more spiritual than physical and nothing gladdens the Devil more than seeing marriages crumble since it is the very institution GOD meticulously established so it is your duty as a lady to guard your marriage and the only logical reason for you to leave your marriage is if your life is seriously threatened...any other reason can be worked out. No matter how many times you change men,there will always be a reason to leave so stop running about and make your marriage work."

okay good

Senseless and degrading thread from tooks2008 as usual.

claseek:
I'll let the subtle shade slide.

However, I did not see where you excused domestic violence as a reason for separation. You just spoke about separation / divorce in general term.

Lastly before I forget, I hope you know its not all separation that stems from the wife? S
There are possibly some times a woman is willing to make it work but the husband just wants to leave. Yeah?

But I agree that in Nigeria divorce is less favorable on a woman than a man.

@ Your concluding remarks it may interest you that it is not also favourable for ladies in the West and in fact they suffer more emotionally.

It is a wicked, selfish and uncaring world of men.

A man divorces a lady who already has kids in most cases, he moves on so fast with a seemingly younger never married lady and in most cases the divorced lady after many years is just there.

I have lost counts of single mothers I have met in the West and they are so lonely and emotionally down.

One called me one day and was practically crying over the phone that she is so lonely and I advised her to go back to her hubby.

She called back 3 days ago thanking me and she was so full of life cos they are back together.

That was when I remembered this thread.

OK

Divay22:
Infidelity
My worse fear in marriage..
Can forgive, bht the love can't be the same again.

Wether the love is the same or not just forgive and be happy.

It has become stale when I hear ladies give infidelity as an excuse for leaving their marriage cos most of them realize too late that most men are just polygamous in nature except the one who just decides to be monogamous sexually.

If every woman can develop a strong emotional shock absorber regarding this I bet we will have more ladies staying in their marriages

Toks2008:


Wether the love is the same or not just forgive and be happy.

It has become stale when I hear ladies give infidelity as an excuse for leaving their marriage cos most of them realize too late that most men are just polygamous in nature except the one who just decides to be monogamous sexually.

If every woman can develop a strong emotional shock absorber regarding this I bet we will have more ladies staying in their marriages

Just like you'll endeavor to take back your wife if she cheats on you.

You're sick and that's why no sane woman will get married to you.

BuyACar:


LMAO

You know why I'm laughing? When do you start counting your infidelity? Most of us are already cheating our marriage mates even before marriage.

So you better warm up to the reality. Infidelity, should not be your worst fear.

You are right you know @first paragraph.

tete7000:


God acts through us using our intellect to help us make choices. In as much as we have freewill and power of choice, if such will and power are exercised without recourse to him we end up with poo. We still need God to make our choices, me need to make those choices using his lens.

I agree with you. GOD rarely tells you vividly who to marry but he can lead us.

Your write up is so biased. Why should it be only the lady that will guard her marriage? So the men should misbehave while the lady should forgive all in the name of remain Mrs.? You have an archaic way of thinking. It takes two to tango. Stop making men feel too important and misbehave just because they feel they have more advantage if the marriage leads to divorce.

I have seen women who are exceedingly successful and very much okay after divorce. I even know some that are still very selective of men coming from their hand in marriage even after having kids in their previous marriage. I know some who refused to get married because they feel they are better off without a man. A woman's life does not revolve around man, stop making it look so.

I don't even know if I'm to share this article with my wife and not making seem as if it's a threat.

Toks2008:
I chose to write this thread cos of the growing trend of many ladies leaving their marriages for reasons that will make a sane person puke and it is so funny that these ladies see no big deal in jumping out of their marriage thinking men out there will just jump at them when there are countless numbers of beautiful never married ladies out there.

One big fact i want every married lady to know is this ....

The moment you are married,the seal of spinsterhood is broken and such seal can never be fixed...in other words...if you leave that union,you can never be seen as a never married or single lady so to say but you automatically become a divorcee. And in most cases also,when men approach divorcees for romantic union,they usually have the mindset that it's a favor they are rendering to these ladies which is why many lady divorcees end up single for a very long time and many end up as intimacy gadgets in the hands of randy men.

Why this sermon? it is to tell ladies that they must really think before they go into any marriage because it is better to be never married at 40 than to be a divorcee at 30.Ladies should see marriage as a very special Institute they must guard and should never take for granted at a time guys don't need a wife to enjoy what husbands enjoy as sex is cheap and it is quite easier getting a baby mama rather than going through the stress of fatherhood...it is quite easier for a guy to spend his money on himself rather than spending on a family.

Believe it or not,most guys in marriage of 5 years and above secretly wish that they have the chance to be with a new lady but only few remain disciplined so it is your duty to guard your marriage and take it very seriously.

For those ladies who are quick to say "I will leave my marriage if my hubby cheats on me"...have you ever thought of the fact that when he eventually cheats on you to your face then he really wants you to leave.

Most ladies who say marriage is not necessary usually enjoy hopping from one man to another and i wonder if that is their preferred option. I will advise them to wake up from their delusion and have a rethink. Marriage is more of companionship than sexual intimacy and no matter how beautiful a lady is,in most cases,once she gets into her 40s,the hype of having men flock around her will dwindle and loneliness becomes the order of the day,...only then will she understand that indeed,marriage is an important aspect of life no woman should joke with.

Marriage is more spiritual than physical and nothing gladdens the Devil more than seeing marriages crumble since it is the very institution GOD meticulously established so it is your duty as a lady to guard your marriage and the only logical reason for you to leave your marriage is if your life is seriously threatened...any other reason can be worked out. No matter how many times you change men,there will always be a reason to leave so stop running about and make your marriage work.

There is no good or bad choice of spouse but what we have is your choice and what you make out of it.

NEVER ALLOW ANOTHER LADY PUSH YOU OUT OF YOUR MARRIAGE OR YOU MAY REGRET IT.

This will definitely make no sense to many ladies.

Toks2008:
I chose to write this thread cos of the growing trend of many ladies leaving their marriages for reasons that will make a sane person puke and it is so funny that these ladies see no big deal in jumping out of their marriage thinking men out there will just jump at them when there are countless numbers of beautiful never married ladies out there.

One big fact i want every married lady to know is this ....

The moment you are married,the seal of spinsterhood is broken and such seal can never be fixed...in other words...if you leave that union,you can never be seen as a never married or single lady so to say but you automatically become a divorcee. And in most cases also,when men approach divorcees for romantic union,they usually have the mindset that it's a favor they are rendering to these ladies which is why many lady divorcees end up single for a very long time and many end up as intimacy gadgets in the hands of randy men.

Why this sermon? it is to tell ladies that they must really think before they go into any marriage because it is better to be never married at 40 than to be a divorcee at 30.Ladies should see marriage as a very special Institute they must guard and should never take for granted at a time guys don't need a wife to enjoy what husbands enjoy as sex is cheap and it is quite easier getting a baby mama rather than going through the stress of fatherhood...it is quite easier for a guy to spend his money on himself rather than spending on a family.

Believe it or not,most guys in marriage of 5 years and above secretly wish that they have the chance to be with a new lady but only few remain disciplined so it is your duty to guard your marriage and take it very seriously.

For those ladies who are quick to say "I will leave my marriage if my hubby cheats on me"...have you ever thought of the fact that when he eventually cheats on you to your face then he really wants you to leave.

Most ladies who say marriage is not necessary usually enjoy hopping from one man to another and i wonder if that is their preferred option. I will advise them to wake up from their delusion and have a rethink. Marriage is more of companionship than sexual intimacy and no matter how beautiful a lady is,in most cases,once she gets into her 40s,the hype of having men flock around her will dwindle and loneliness becomes the order of the day,...only then will she understand that indeed,marriage is an important aspect of life no woman should joke with.

Marriage is more spiritual than physical and nothing gladdens the Devil more than seeing marriages crumble since it is the very institution GOD meticulously established so it is your duty as a lady to guard your marriage and the only logical reason for you to leave your marriage is if your life is seriously threatened...any other reason can be worked out. No matter how many times you change men,there will always be a reason to leave so stop running about and make your marriage work.

There is no good or bad choice of spouse but what we have is your choice and what you make out of it.

NEVER ALLOW ANOTHER LADY PUSH YOU OUT OF YOUR MARRIAGE OR YOU MAY REGRET IT.

This will definitely make no sense to many ladies.

I don't even know if I'm to share this article with my wife and not making seem as if it's a threat.

Just back from church... anyone in the house?

memories1:
Your message is good, but your title is warped. Marriage is a privilege to both men and women. While men might find it easier to remarry after a broken one, there is still this pervasive negativity attached to such men as those 'who couldn't maintain a marriage'.
Perhaps you haven't been acquainted with a man saddled with a bad marriage, experiencing their frustration would remind you that marriage is a privilege to both genders. Always look at both sides of the coin so you don't come across as a sexist.

Toks2008's posts on relationships and marriage has never failed to reveal His warped, traditionalist, subtle sexist mindset.
I'm not surprised. Most of his posts on relationship are mostly directed to the feminine gender, subtly telling them to be submissive and willing to take anything they see in other to get married and stay married. He makes a lot of mention of age, he opines that women under 25 should not be considered for marriage and a lot of baloney.
Forget him

mmyfarmsltd:
I don't even know if I'm to share this article with my wife and not making seem as if it's a threat.

Just tell her that one warped minded misogynist wrote one funny article and you don't even know what to say....then let her read and make her judgement.

Chi59:

Toks2008's posts on relationships and marriage has never failed to reveal His warped, traditionalist, subtle sexist mindset.
I'm not surprised. Most of his posts on relationship are mostly directed to the feminine gender, subtly telling them to be submissive and willing to take anything they see in other to get married and stay married. He makes a lot of mention of age, he opines that women under 25 should not be considered for marriage and a lot of baloney.
Forget him

Aunty Chi biko forget me but just remember my crazy articles should you or anyone you know be faced with the harsh reality.

Ask Toke, Juliet Ibrahim, Linda ikeji and several other so called feminists out there I guess they will lecture you better.

You must think I'm foolish when I chose to put more emphasis on the feminine gender...look around you and tell me if it is not too obvious that when divorce occurs, it is the woman that suffers more in most cases so continue to live in delusion.

Whilst Juliet Ibrahim husband has moved on and even has kids with the new lady, Juliet ass is being groped,used and dumped and I can give you series of known feminine figures who are divorced and their ex have moved on whilst they are still single.

I never said some men don't feel it too but why bother myself about the men when it is the women who suffer more.

Only women who read my articles without sentiments can understand that I'm only trying to safeguard the psyche of the ladies.

Toks2008:


Aunty Chi biko forget me but just remember my crazy articles should you or anyone you know be faced with the harsh reality.

Ask Toke, Juliet Ibrahim, Linda ikeji and several other so called feminists out there I guess they will lecture you better.

You must think I'm foolish when I chose to put more emphasis on the feminine gender...look around you and tell me if it is not too obvious that when divorce occurs, it is the woman that suffers more in most cases so continue to live in delusion.

Whilst Juliet Ibrahim husband has moved on and even has kids with the new lady, Juliet ass is being groped,used and dumped and I can give you series of known feminine figures who are divorced and their ex have moved on whilst they are still single.

I never said some men don't feel it too but why bother myself about the men when it is the women who suffer more.

Only women who read my articles without sentiments can understand that I'm only trying to safeguard the psyche of the ladies.

Still a bucket load of baloney.
Why don't you just go and get married?
Uncle know-it-all, practice what you preach.