Toks2008:


And will this change a thing?

MsRoe:


Yes.

WORDWORLD:
Toks2008 you are among the very FEW who add VALUE to our humanity on NL.

I love the way you keep enlightening especially ladys. TRUTH HURTS.

Toks2008:


Thanks brother .

And they hate me so much...expecially the teenagers and adolescents who are still starting life and have no clue yet of what romance is all about.

WORDWORLD:


The merchants of illusion have taken hold of their reasoning. I bet you the few who choose to be wise among them are learning alot from you.. its a natural law that the FOOLISH live a life of regret. It always baffels me how most ladies care less despite the fact that the pay the most price when things go wrong in a relationship. Yet they are mostly glued to supperfaciality that ends up dumping them in the waste bin.
GOOD JOB BRO! ALOT OF PEOPLE JUST COME ONLINE TO DISPLAY HOW EMPTY THEY ARE UPSTAIRS. CONTRIBUTING NOTHING.

memories1:
Your message is good, but your title is warped

memories1:
Your message is good, but your title is warped. Marriage is a privilege to both men and women. While men might find it easier to remarry after a broken one, there is still this pervasive negativity attached to such men as those 'who couldn't maintain a marriage'.
Perhaps you haven't been acquainted with a man saddled with a bad marriage, experiencing their frustration would remind you that marriage is a privilege to both genders. Always look at both sides of the coin so you don't come across as a sexist.

TheUmbra:
Toks2008 at it again! Like me you'd never sacrifice truth for convenience.

You've spoken the truth. There're two types of people who would oppose your view as expressed in your article, one for each gender.

Most guys that would oppose your views here were either brought up by their moms or they have an abusive father. And they've come to hate the male folk and everything that seem to associate with their authority and advantage.

The other group are feminists from the female gender who may hate men for the same reason stated earlier.

But their views have no influence on reality. Once a woman was once married and steps out of her marriage in the name of divorce, there's only one thing in the mind of the average man - she's second hand.

Toks2008:


You can only imagine that the title I gave is an issue that lalasticlala is even bothered about but unfortunately I may have to sacrifice front page rather than for me to change that title cos I can't sugar coat it

TheUmbra:


You can still tweak the title a bit. Let it hit front page and meet the bigger audience. I understand lalasticlala's concern but as long as the message remains intact, you can sacrifice the title.

Toks2008:


My brother I no they tweerk or tweak anything...if lalasticlala like let him even close the thread I care less.

the disclaimer Seun put at the bottom of nairaland page is clear enough and it states "Every Nairaland member is
solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland"

Yes I like my articles to get to front page because I write good stuffs but I'm not desperate about front page.

A good writer must have traffic generating titles that will attract people to view and not the type that people just read and assume the contents without bothering to click on the thread...this is not my style....controversy sells and that is one secret of top bloggers.

Let the mods leave this thread if they find the title appalling and consider my other great threads with subtle titles yet to grace front page...

-Dangerous desire(Ife gbonna)
https://www.nairaland.com/3835190/dangerous-desire-ife-gbona

-Before you fire the shots
https://www.nairaland.com/3610005/before-fire-shots

- When You Have To Choose Between A Philandering Husband Or Polygamy.
https://www.nairaland.com/3680733/when-choose-between-philandering-husband

-6 ways women can avoid domestic violence.(I had to edit this title from "6 ways some women cause domestic violence" after Seun ordered the thread be removed from front page but if you read through the threads you will find marriage saving facts there)
https://www.nairaland.com/3094868/6-ways-women-avoid-domestic

As far as I'm. concerned,there is nothing bad about this thread title cos that is my opinion as the writer.

pocohantas:
LOL!
Lala can not find this insightful because he knows both gender should guard a marriage. This is why some women are struggling to keep their marriage going while the man fu<ks around or acts nonchalantly. She must guard the marriage so she doesn't turn to the abominable divorce...even it means enduring emotional and physical abuse.

The man on his part has nothing to lose, he can always get another wife. Nigerian marriage is so sweet .

Originalsly:
Let me first quote from where many will dare not disagree...."He who findeth a wife findeth a good thing.... that's from the Bible. ... so isn't the man the lucky one to find a wife? After marriage many men realize the woman of the house is simply the woman of the house and not a wife..... and out of the marriage he steps to search all over again for a wife. Unlucky man ... lucky woman.

Martin0:
that why as a lady if u want ur husband to be faithful there are somethings as a lady u should let go(Quit the porn. Bringing porn into a
relationship is not healthy. It’s like bringing
another woman into your marriage, except
she’s glossy and airbrushed. Porn will only
create an unrealistic expectation in your mind
about your spouse’s libido, body, and comfort
level with weird sex positions. Pretty soon
you’ll find that your wife isn’t satisfying you
and your eyes will start to wander. Dump the
porn.)Not all ladies do this but majority start bringing it into their marriage likwise men

pocohantas:

A man goes fu<king around acting nonchalantly and his wife must doggedly and tenaciously protect his wandering prick, that might be laced with HIV. She must guard the marriage so she doesn't turn to the abominable divorcee...

The man on his part has nothing to lose, he can always get another wife. Nigerian marriage is so sweet .
So many unhappy married men and women. Who in his right mind would be enthusiastic about joining the bandwagon? Marriage that should be enjoyed is now something they encourage people to endure adultery and all sorts in? Instead of teaching people to love and treat their spouses as they'll treat themselves.

DON:

there is enough point in what toks is saying above except if you don't want to accept the truth which is bitter, a man has either little or nothing to loss in a relationship compared to a woman.

Toks2008:


Talking about porn I totally agree with you on this.

Many ladies tend to measure the manliness of the porn actors to that of their hubby and they begin to fantasize thereby deriving lesser pleasure from their husbands.

lezz:
Non-compromising facts. But there’s just a little bias in that op makes females appear to be the only ones at the losing end of divorce.

Statistics show men’s lifespan and wellbeing are affected more in divorce than woman’s even though women are likely to face harsher financial reality.

Toks2008:


There is no bias bro..it's all about statistics and please leave finance out of it.

In developed country,a lady gets more money from the Government as a separated single mum but what about emotional and biological needs?

Toks2008:
I chose to write this thread cos of the growing trend of many ladies leaving their marriages for reasons that will make a sane person puke and it is so funny that these ladies see no big deal in jumping out of their marriage thinking men out there will just jump at them when there are countless numbers of beautiful never married ladies out there.

One big fact i want every married lady to know is this ....

The moment you are married,the seal of spinsterhood is broken and such seal can never be fixed...in other words...if you leave that union,you can never be seen as a never married or single lady so to say but you automatically become a divorcee. And in most cases also,when men approach divorcees for romantic union,they usually have the mindset that it's a favor they are rendering to these ladies which is why many lady divorcees end up single for a very long time and many end up as intimacy gadgets in the hands of randy men.

Why this sermon? it is to tell ladies that they must really think before they go into any marriage because it is better to be never married at 40 than to be a divorcee at 30.Ladies should see marriage as a very special Institute they must guard and should never take for granted at a time guys don't need a wife to enjoy what husbands enjoy as sex is cheap and it is quite easier getting a baby mama rather than going through the stress of fatherhood...it is quite easier for a guy to spend his money on himself rather than spending on a family.

Believe it or not,most guys in marriage of 5 years and above secretly wish that they have the chance to be with a new lady but only few remain disciplined so it is your duty to guard your marriage and take it very seriously.

For those ladies who are quick to say "I will leave my marriage if my hubby cheats on me"...have you ever thought of the fact that when he eventually cheats on you to your face then he really wants you to leave.

For those ladies who believe that marriage is not necessary,I will advise them to have a rethink because marriage is more of companionship.No matter how beautiful a lady is,in most cases,once she gets into her 40s,the hype of having men flock around her will dwindle and loneliness becomes the order of the day,...only then will she understand that indeed,marriage is an important aspect of life no woman should joke with.

Marriage is more spiritual than physical and nothing gladdens the Devil more than seeing marriages crumble since it is the very institution GOD meticulously established so it is your duty as a lady to guard your marriage and the only logical reason for you to leave your marriage is if your life is seriously threatened...any other reason can be worked out. No matter how many times you change me,there will always be a reason to leave so stop running about and make hyour marriage work.

There is no good or bad choice of spouse but what we have is your choice and what you make out of it.

NEVER ALLOW ANOTHER LADY PUSH YOU OUT OF YOUR MARRIAGE OR YOU MAY REGRET IT.

This will definitely make no sense to many ladies.

Toks2008:


Lalasticlala

mrphysics:

Toks2008 welcome back.

Where have you been? We have got new generation of kids on nairaland coupled with the grown kids who reason from their anus. These people needs to be baptised.