I created this moniker merely to hide my identity as I am one of the active members on this Forum.Moreover, the lady in question is also on this forum although she is just a passive member.
I met her during my service year in the southwest and caught feelings even on the first day. We got talking and a relationship started after some weeks. I really love her even more than before and I still have this feeling that she would definitely come to her senses although a part of me is telling me that she is not willing to make amends.
I have been able to empower her although much proceeds are not coming forth for now as we are collectively building a strong customer base for her business and with God on our side we would definitely get there soon. Besides she is a beneficiary of one of the federal government of Nigeria employment schemes for youths in the country. She never wanted to get herself involved in the scheme fearing that she would not make the final list but I encouraged her and took it upon myself to make it work out for her. I have shown her love and care in my own way and I'm even willing to do more for her because I want to see her Happy.
However, the bone of contentment is that she is too egoistic and rarely does she see her wrongs nor feel its cool to apologize. I have sat her down several times and tried to talk senses into her head and even had her close friend talk to her about it but all to no avail. Most times, she wouldn't talk to me for two days until I apologize for what she did. Even at that, it would take her like a day to accept my apologies. I know that most of you would say it's odd for a man to apologise for what he is not quilty of.
I got the shock of my life when she asked me if I can remember her asking me to apologize to her. This was after she did something nasty.
This is the same lady I hope to perform her marital rite soon. I'm somewhat in my late twenties. I really love children and I hope to start a family in my young days so that they can grow with me. I think my love for kids is out of this world but she is likely gonna make me change my mind about that.
I wanna quit and go search for love elsewhere but I feel she deserves another chance.. Actually I'm lost and can't figure out why she is acting up.
What do I do? Has anyone here ever been in this shoe before and how did they deal with it?
Is there any hope that she would change?
Lalasticlala has this ever happened to you?

Ftc... I'm coming to reply

av got a nice piece of advice for u bro but would be back later to dish it out to u......for now, let me quickly go check my beans that is on fire before it gets burnt........i cannot risk to go hungry this night; never!!

Seems she can’t admit she is wrong...
Well I doubt she will Chang might even get worse ... if you really love her and still want to marry her then that’s the compromise you will have to accept ...
There is no perfect relationship! If this is her only flaw then the question is can you live with it ?
Btw the grass isn’t always greener

Leave her and let her go. When her pride teaches her a hard lesson (she never gets married before menopause or she becomes the spouse of a wife beater) , humility will be her second name

My two cents

I don't have any advice for you since she is the one doing the wrong thing. post her number here so I can give my advice directly to her

There are no perfect relationships

dynicks:
av got a nice piece of advice for u bro but would be back later to dish it out to u......for now, let me quickly go check my beans that is on fire before it gets burnt........i cannot risk to go hungry this night; never!!

Oh I love beans...
Okay later
Modified.
Wait oh.. The beans never do?

Dude, just have it at the back of your mind you aren't marrying that girl... Simple.. Play along... If she offers you sex, you bang.. But let it be known to you that the Rship ain't heading to the altar because she is not the kind of woman you imagine to spend the days of your life with.

But you've seen all these signs from the very beginning and yet you loved her all the same.
Why consider the character now?

There are some character that can not be changed. It's in-built(natural).

It is a mistake for a man or woman to enter into marriage with the hope of changing the character of the marriage partner.

If you break up with her and start up afresh with someone else, the new one may not possess an egoistic character but another nauseating character.
There are no prefect relationships just as there are no perfect humans.

Lalas247:
Seems she can’t admit she is wrong...
Well I doubt she will Chang might even get worse ... if you really love her and still want to marry her then that’s the compromise you will have to accept ...
There is no perfect relationship! If this is her only flaw then the question is can you live with it ?
Btw the grass isn’t always greener

I know that the grass isnt always greener on the other side but it's becoming obvious that she is not really into me the way I am into her.
I had passed tru alot in life and I worked so hard to get here. Atleast I deserve a good woman

Angy55:
But you've seen all these signs from the very beginning and yet you loved her all the same.
Why consider the character now?

There are some character that can not be changed. It's in-built(natural).

It is a mistake for a man or woman to enter into marriage with the hope of changing the character of the marriage partner.

If you break up with her and start up afresh with someone else, the new one may not possess an egoistic character but another nauseating character.
There are not prefect relationships just as there are no perfect humans.

She never showed me those signs until now. There are few things that I can take from other people and this isn't one of them..

dingbang:
Dude, just have it at the back of your mind you aren't marrying that girl... Simple.. Play along... If she offers you sex, you bang.. But let it be known to you that the Rship ain't heading to the altar because she is not the kind of woman you imagine to spend the days of your life with.

Sex is outta the box.I wouldnt like her to complain that she has been wasting her time with me all along. I just need a loyal woman

So sorry that we don't choose who we fall in love with. Weigh your options and know if you can stay with her, if you can't please let her be. From your story, you have really invested in this relationship but you know what, you can still let go for a broken relationship is far better than a broken marriage

If she is not ready to change,amend her egostic character,respect you and she want to remained on toga tower..pls leave her and move on.She had no love for you,you are the one that love her and that is too dangerous for any good marriage.

Katier00:
So sorry that we don't choose who we fall in love with. Weigh your options and know if you can stay with her, if you can't please let her be. From your story, you have really invested in this relationship but you know what, you can still let go for a broken relationship is far better than a broken marriage

Thanks for ur advice.

I hate when a girl refuses to let me give her head ehn especially if she is someone I am dating and really in live with.

Giving a girl head makes me feel like a amb just eating her all out watching her scream
Eat her for*30 mins and make her scream she must respect you

Bitch-made men everywhere...

Caring0:
I hate when a girl refuses to let me give her head ehn especially if she is someone I am dating and really in live with.

Giving a girl head makes me feel like a amb just eating her all out watching her scream
Eat her for*30 mins and make her scream she must respect you

I don't think giving a woman head makes her eat humble pie. Thanks anyway

2buffagain:
Bitch-made men everywhere...

Lalasticlala there is a buff behind this moniker.
Buff (turkey), a breed of domestic turkey named for its buff-colored plumage.
I think this thread is only for human beings who have respect for others and post positive things for others to read and learn from. Get outta here please before I kill you for Sunday's rice and stew

i believe you know the difference between goodmorning,goodnight and goodbye.

Cooldude180:
I created this moniker merely to hide my identity as I am one of the active members on this Forum.Moreover, the lady in question is also on this forum although she is just a passive member.
I met her during my service year in the southwest and caught feelings even on the first day. We got talking and a relationship started after some weeks. I really love her even more than before and I still have this feeling that she would definitely come to her senses although a part of me is telling me that she is not willing to make amends.
I have been able to empower her although much proceeds are not coming forth for now as we are collectively building a strong customer base for her business and with God on our side we would definitely get there soon. Besides she is a beneficiary of one of the federal government of Nigeria employment schemes for youths in the country. She never wanted to get herself involved in the scheme fearing that she would not make the final list but I encouraged her and took it upon myself to make it work out for her. I have shown her love and care in my own way and I'm even willing to do more for her because I want to see her Happy.
However, the bone of contentment is that she is too egoistic and rarely does she see her wrongs nor feel its cool to apologize. I have sat her down several times and tried to talk senses into her head and even had her close friend talk to her about it but all to no avail. Most times, she wouldn't talk to me for two days until I apologize for what she did. Even at that, it would take her like a day to accept my apologies. I know that most of you would say it's odd for a man to apologise for what he is not quilty of.
I got the shock of my life when she asked me if I can remember her asking me to apologize to her. This was after she did something nasty.
This is the same lady I hope to perform her marital rite soon. I'm somewhat in my late twenties. I really love children and I hope to start a family in my young days so that they can grow with me. I think my love for kids is out of this world but she is likely gonna make me change my mind about that.
I wanna quit and go search for love elsewhere but I feel she deserves another chance.. Actually I'm lost and can't figure out why she is acting up.
What do I do? Has anyone here ever been in this shoe before and how did they deal with it?
Is there any hope that she would change?
Lalasticlala has this ever happened to you?

If you see the signs please move on, 90% of people don't change in marriage they remain who they are .

In other words if you feel irritated by her now you most likely will be during marriage.

Cooldude180:
I created this moniker merely to hide my identity as I am one of the active members on this Forum.Moreover, the lady in question is also on this forum although she is just a passive member.
I met her during my service year in the southwest and caught feelings even on the first day. We got talking and a relationship started after some weeks. I really love her even more than before and I still have this feeling that she would definitely come to her senses although a part of me is telling me that she is not willing to make amends.
I have been able to empower her although much proceeds are not coming forth for now as we are collectively building a strong customer base for her business and with God on our side we would definitely get there soon. Besides she is a beneficiary of one of the federal government of Nigeria employment schemes for youths in the country. She never wanted to get herself involved in the scheme fearing that she would not make the final list but I encouraged her and took it upon myself to make it work out for her. I have shown her love and care in my own way and I'm even willing to do more for her because I want to see her Happy.
However, the bone of contentment is that she is too egoistic and rarely does she see her wrongs nor feel its cool to apologize. I have sat her down several times and tried to talk senses into her head and even had her close friend talk to her about it but all to no avail. Most times, she wouldn't talk to me for two days until I apologize for what she did. Even at that, it would take her like a day to accept my apologies. I know that most of you would say it's odd for a man to apologise for what he is not quilty of.
I got the shock of my life when she asked me if I can remember her asking me to apologize to her. This was after she did something nasty.
This is the same lady I hope to perform her marital rite soon. I'm somewhat in my late twenties. I really love children and I hope to start a family in my young days so that they can grow with me. I think my love for kids is out of this world but she is likely gonna make me change my mind about that.
I wanna quit and go search for love elsewhere but I feel she deserves another chance.. Actually I'm lost and can't figure out why she is acting up.
What do I do? Has anyone here ever been in this shoe before and how did they deal with it?
Is there any hope that she would change?
Lalasticlala has this ever happened to you?

First of all, it was needless creating a new moniker because the said lady since she's on NL, when she sees this thread she will know the person behind the moniker. Also you shouldn't give a fvck about nairalanders what they gon say or do. Or is there any nlder u are dating that prompt u to create a new moniker so she won't know you have a real girl in the real world?

Now to your matter, give her a little chance. Everybody deserves a second chance. Her character is what most ladies possessed.

Netanyahu1:
If you see the signs please move on, 90% of people don't change in marriage they remain who they are .

In other words if you feel irritated by her now you most likely will be during marriage.

Thanks..

milemimi93:


First of all, it was needless creating a new moniker because the said lady since she's on NL, when she sees this thread she will know the person behind the moniker. Also you shouldn't give a fvck about nairalanders what they gon say or do. Or is there any nlder u are dating that prompt u to create a new moniker so she won't know you have a real girl in the real world?

Now to your matter, give her a little chance. Everybody deserves a second chance. Her character is what most ladies possessed.

So u think it's safer for me to use my well known moniker to post this same thread cos of this ur I don't care thing?.
Its ur opinion sir and by the way, I'm not a playboy. I have stuck with this same girl for over two years now.

Nawa u even apologizes for her wrong doing, maybe am nt human thats why i can not luv cus i see this type of thing as a sign of weakness and iberiberism

Hector09:
Nawa u even apologizes for her wrong doing, maybe am nt human thats why i can not luv cus i see this type of thing as a sign of weakness and iberiberism

Maybe.. But I just wanted to set a good example for her to follow not knowing that it's a fruitless venture.

Cooldude180:

I know that the grass isnt always greener on the other side but it's becoming obvious that she is not really into me the way I am into her.

The above is the koko.....
That girl doesn't love u the way u love her....
Worse still, it doesn't seem she fully appreciate ur love...
My guy, u gonna find it hard to tame that girl n I seriously doubt she will ever be fully submissive to u....
My advice is don't burn urself out....
Gradually withdraw n begin to draw limit to how much emotional attachment going into the relationship....
I know the above is difficult but it's better than getting exhausted n then u become frustrated due to unreciprocated love....
If u take the above steps, she will definitely notice the change....
Her response will determine ur next action....

Bro stop living for any body and start living for urself, infact instead of u to help any girl, help ur sisters am talking frm an xperience

Cooldude180:

Maybe.. But I just wanted to set a good example for her to follow not knowing that it's a fruitless venture.

Cooldude180:

So u think it's safer for me to use my well known moniker to post this same thread cos of this ur I don't care thing?.
Its ur opinion sir and by the way, I'm not a playboy. I have stuck with this same girl for over two years now.

I never said u are a playboy. I was just wondering why you'd create a new moniker just to post your problem and seek for advice like is there anyone here paying ya bills or what?

No hard feelings bruv

SIRTee15:


The above is the koko.....
That girl doesn't love u the way u love her....
Worse still, it doesn't seem she fully appreciate ur love...
My guy, u gonna find it hard to tame that girl n I seriously doubt she will ever be fully submissive to u....
My advice is don't burn urself out....
Gradually withdraw n begin to draw limit to how much emotional attachment going into the relationship....
I know the above is difficult but it's better than getting exhausted n then u become frustrated due to unreciprocated love....
If u take the above steps, she will definitely notice the change....
Her response will determine ur next action....

Thanks Sirtee15. Great advice