Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Famzer: 1:19am On Oct 04, 2018 |
"The sound of Okokomaiko and Mazamaza can cure madness" That irony really cracked me up!! You are a Genius bro! May God bless you(Amen) 6 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by CaptainFM1: 1:57am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Are the youth really ready for this country Smh! |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Nobody: 2:07am On Oct 04, 2018 |
This line was like so on point. Ambode will attest to this by now. Lol "Ikeja is the official capital of Lagos. The State House is on the Island, where the real capital is. Lagos deserves a special status in the constitution.index" 6 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by habeeb04(m): 2:09am On Oct 04, 2018 |
. The number of youths in Festac makes one wonder if they ate their parents for dinner. haba wetin we f town do you now
nice one sha 1 Like |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Differentials1: 2:09am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Good one but, not a total coverage! Badagry was not featured so also is Ijora (badia and olopa). What about Iba even though ojo was mentioned. Then Mafoluku, almighty oshodi, Mushin olosha, makoko, palmgrove onipanu, Berger, isolo, ejigbo, Ajangbadi, Abule Egba, Alakuko, Meiran, oyingbo... just for a mention! Lazyreporta: On the Island of the affluent in Lagos, I rarely hear aircraft buzzing in the sky, except the posh helicopters of the busy rich. The airport and flight noise don’t affect the airspace, it only devalues the land.
The rich pretend to pray, but God is on the Mainland, land on the island is too expensive to build many worship centers.
The Island was not built for Beer. It is the hub of champagne, spirits, and wines. Beer is for the road, an appetizer bottled on the Mainland.
The Mainland is crowded with families. Life on the island has no friends. Everything is cash or ‘waka’. The roads are expensively tolled, the schools are US ‘Dollard’, and a smile might cost some ‘Nairas’.
The Island expands while the Mainland remains the same. Under neon lights, millions of Mainland ‘ants’ trample on the Third Mainland Bridge into the Island of their dreams. Many die on the bridge, many earn a kobo, and many rob the others. 1
The Island goes to the Mainland, only to fly. Life on the mainland has many tribes. Bad roads and traffic jamborees in Enugu suburbs like Ago and Okota would eventually pursue ‘Omo Igbo’ to the East. The smart ones live in Yoruba neighborhoods, like itire, with Chinese constructed drainages. Sharp guys have moved into Surulere, the Governor’s neighborhood and the best place to drink. The number of youths in Festac makes one wonder if they ate their parents for dinner.
Ketu is a gang of Yoruba women hustling to breathe. Ikorodu can be great if it gets a bridge into the island. Yaba is the link between books, Aristos, ‘White House’ and an infamous Psyche ward (Yaba-left).yaba
Sex is on Allen, tax is a joyride at Alausa. Obanikoro is the name of a man on the Island and a place in the Mainland. Everything on the Mainland is made in Ilupeju, Ogba, Isolo, Agidingbi, and Oregun. Agbara is not on the Mainland, it’s in Ogun state, like Mowe and Ibafo.
Everything on the Island is imported from the Mainland ports of Apapa and Tin Can. The sound of Mazamaza and Okokomaiko can cure madness. Homes in Idi-Araba are waiting to collapse, thank God for LUTH; Igbobi’s Orthopedics is not too far away.
There is a Lagos state University campus in every Mainland corner; the main campus and a military cantonment are at Ojo. Musicians from Mushin and Ajegunle have monopolized the sympathy of poverty, while Egbeda and Ikotun get no pity. If eyes are closed in Agege and Iddo when a train passes, one can pretend to be in Grand Central Station. 3Gbagadans usually pretend to be on the Island, but Oworonshoki can’t get away with such lies. Ogudu GRA insists on being distinct from a conjoined Ojota, while Amuwo-Odofin calls itself Festac Extension.
Iju and Ojodu villages are hyped by estate agents. Ebute-Metta is an old Yoruba phrase: “A place of three shores.” It is a decaying dream of British colonialism and Brazilian architecture.
Most of the residents of Magodo and Omole are Landlords. Maryland is not a saint and Anthony is not a Village. Igando and Ipaja are playing catching up with the state government.
Ikeja is the official capital of Lagos. The State House is on the Island, where the real capital is. Lagos deserves a special status in the constitution.index
On the Island, money has relatives. Ikoyi and Victoria Island are twin sisters, posh from birth and wrinkled with age. Lekki is a distant cousin, taxing and full of fraudulent schemes. VGC and Eleko are wealthy uncles, isolated from others and always overseas. Nicon and Parkview are the pretty nieces with feigned American and British accents. Oniru and Elegushi are the nephews from the village, who recently found wealth and arrogance. Ajah is the Step-sister, giving birth to children she can’t feed. Jakande and Igbo-Efon are broke In-laws, hardworking but always in need. Ibeju-Lekki and Epe are the Jilted aunts, feeding on promises and searching for suitors. Obalende is the lost brother without a mind, thought to be dead. Eko, Idumota, and Marina are Triplets of Royal descents, with trade on their minds, and power between their legs. Maroko is the baby that was aborted at Midterm. Makoko is the dirty bastard that wouldn’t disappear. Eko Atlantic City has recently left the incubator, hoping to survive. Many other siblings are just occupying space and causing traffic jams on the Island of the rich.
This is how I know I’m not on the Island: service attendants begging for money; Lastma officials lurking behind traffic lights; Dunghill switch is everywhere, and I can’t get an Iota of decency.
Source... Lazyreporta
1 Like |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Differentials1: 2:14am On Oct 04, 2018 |
You dey ply the route well... you just arrange everything like conductor wey dey call in clients...na Abule Ado... no be mburuado... and iyana iba... volks, Alaba rago, Alaba suuru, ... emmabest2000:
Agboju alakija frinaija mburuado ! Yanaba vus agric alaba lago okoko 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by andyanders: 2:15am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Op, you deserve an award. Great work. Well done. 2 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Nobody: 2:16am On Oct 04, 2018 |
This is thrilling!!!! The ogudu/ojota comparison is apt! Heigod... You took me down memorial lane with the Alausa - oregun creative description. Chai! I see what you did to the ibeju-lekki residents, kosi wahala sogbo, we don bend down pack our sub! I wish say you be woman, I for just dash you one wig. Weldone Op, I want to see more of your writeup. 8 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by lonelydora: 2:31am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Lazyreporta: On the Island of the affluent in Lagos, I rarely hear aircraft buzzing in the sky, except the posh helicopters of the busy rich. The airport and flight noise don’t affect the airspace, it only devalues the land.
The rich pretend to pray, but God is on the Mainland, land on the island is too expensive to build many worship centers.
The Island was not built for Beer. It is the hub of champagne, spirits, and wines. Beer is for the road, an appetizer bottled on the Mainland.
The Mainland is crowded with families. Life on the island has no friends. Everything is cash or ‘waka’. The roads are expensively tolled, the schools are US ‘Dollard’, and a smile might cost some ‘Nairas’.
The Island expands while the Mainland remains the same. Under neon lights, millions of Mainland ‘ants’ trample on the Third Mainland Bridge into the Island of their dreams. Many die on the bridge, many earn a kobo, and many rob the others. 1
The Island goes to the Mainland, only to fly. Life on the mainland has many tribes. Bad roads and traffic jamborees in Enugu suburbs like Ago and Okota would eventually pursue ‘Omo Igbo’ to the East. The smart ones live in Yoruba neighborhoods, like itire, with Chinese constructed drainages. Sharp guys have moved into Surulere, the Governor’s neighborhood and the best place to drink. The number of youths in Festac makes one wonder if they ate their parents for dinner.
Ketu is a gang of Yoruba women hustling to breathe. Ikorodu can be great if it gets a bridge into the island. Yaba is the link between books, Aristos, ‘White House’ and an infamous Psyche ward (Yaba-left).yaba
Sex is on Allen, tax is a joyride at Alausa. Obanikoro is the name of a man on the Island and a place in the Mainland. Everything on the Mainland is made in Ilupeju, Ogba, Isolo, Agidingbi, and Oregun. Agbara is not on the Mainland, it’s in Ogun state, like Mowe and Ibafo.
Everything on the Island is imported from the Mainland ports of Apapa and Tin Can. The sound of Mazamaza and Okokomaiko can cure madness. Homes in Idi-Araba are waiting to collapse, thank God for LUTH; Igbobi’s Orthopedics is not too far away.
There is a Lagos state University campus in every Mainland corner; the main campus and a military cantonment are at Ojo. Musicians from Mushin and Ajegunle have monopolized the sympathy of poverty, while Egbeda and Ikotun get no pity. If eyes are closed in Agege and Iddo when a train passes, one can pretend to be in Grand Central Station. 3Gbagadans usually pretend to be on the Island, but Oworonshoki can’t get away with such lies. Ogudu GRA insists on being distinct from a conjoined Ojota, while Amuwo-Odofin calls itself Festac Extension.
Iju and Ojodu villages are hyped by estate agents. Ebute-Metta is an old Yoruba phrase: “A place of three shores.” It is a decaying dream of British colonialism and Brazilian architecture.
Most of the residents of Magodo and Omole are Landlords. Maryland is not a saint and Anthony is not a Village. Igando and Ipaja are playing catching up with the state government.
Ikeja is the official capital of Lagos. The State House is on the Island, where the real capital is. Lagos deserves a special status in the constitution.index
On the Island, money has relatives. Ikoyi and Victoria Island are twin sisters, posh from birth and wrinkled with age. Lekki is a distant cousin, taxing and full of fraudulent schemes. VGC and Eleko are wealthy uncles, isolated from others and always overseas. Nicon and Parkview are the pretty nieces with feigned American and British accents. Oniru and Elegushi are the nephews from the village, who recently found wealth and arrogance. Ajah is the Step-sister, giving birth to children she can’t feed. Jakande and Igbo-Efon are broke In-laws, hardworking but always in need. Ibeju-Lekki and Epe are the Jilted aunts, feeding on promises and searching for suitors. Obalende is the lost brother without a mind, thought to be dead. Eko, Idumota, and Marina are Triplets of Royal descents, with trade on their minds, and power between their legs. Maroko is the baby that was aborted at Midterm. Makoko is the dirty bastard that wouldn’t disappear. Eko Atlantic City has recently left the incubator, hoping to survive. Many other siblings are just occupying space and causing traffic jams on the Island of the rich.
This is how I know I’m not on the Island: service attendants begging for money; Lastma officials lurking behind traffic lights; Dunghill switch is everywhere, and I can’t get an Iota of decency.
Source... Lazyreporta
Wow! Great writeup. Even though i have not been to some of these places, reading it has created the picture on my mind 3 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by lonelydora: 2:33am On Oct 04, 2018 |
tabithababy: Nice. What of palm groove, bariga and the likes He said "Some other siblings are just occupying space and causing traffic jam" What a way to end 5 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by hizmail(m): 3:12am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Great pen 1 Like |
|
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Snapchat: 3:35am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Iju is not posh but it's not a village either. OP take time. 1 Like |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by arabralph(m): 3:59am On Oct 04, 2018 |
You didn't include Oshodi of all places an epicentre faa...[color=#770077][/color] |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by GreenCap: 4:03am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Food111:
Bros make I send my own too. Hunger wan finish person for school places to do internship in Lagos: PZ, Ilupeju Guiness, Ogba Chivita, Isolo Coca-Cola, Agidingbi Lever Brothers, Oregun Ogun state: Nestle, Agbara Redeem camp, Mowe Mountain of Fire prayer city, Ibafon 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by israelmao(m): 4:14am On Oct 04, 2018 |
This is so creative and I believe it was tasking putting all these places in write-up.You deserve an award.With this when someone tells you where he or she stays in Lagos you can quickly shuffle his or her social status.I believe you can make good money out of this if packaged in a book.You have given anyone that cares to know panoramic view of Lagos! 7 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by HomeOfMe(f): 4:26am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Lazyreporta: On the Island of the affluent in Lagos, I rarely hear aircraft buzzing in the sky, except the posh helicopters of the busy rich. The airport and flight noise don’t affect the airspace, it only devalues the land.
The rich pretend to pray, but God is on the Mainland, land on the island is too expensive to build many worship centers.
The Island was not built for Beer. It is the hub of champagne, spirits, and wines. Beer is for the road, an appetizer bottled on the Mainland.
The Mainland is crowded with families. Life on the island has no friends. Everything is cash or ‘waka’. The roads are expensively tolled, the schools are US ‘Dollard’, and a smile might cost some ‘Nairas’.
The Island expands while the Mainland remains the same. Under neon lights, millions of Mainland ‘ants’ trample on the Third Mainland Bridge into the Island of their dreams. Many die on the bridge, many earn a kobo, and many rob the others. 1
The Island goes to the Mainland, only to fly. Life on the mainland has many tribes. Bad roads and traffic jamborees in Enugu suburbs like Ago and Okota would eventually pursue ‘Omo Igbo’ to the East. The smart ones live in Yoruba neighborhoods, like itire, with Chinese constructed drainages. Sharp guys have moved into Surulere, the Governor’s neighborhood and the best place to drink. The number of youths in Festac makes one wonder if they ate their parents for dinner.
Ketu is a gang of Yoruba women hustling to breathe. Ikorodu can be great if it gets a bridge into the island. Yaba is the link between books, Aristos, ‘White House’ and an infamous Psyche ward (Yaba-left).yaba
Sex is on Allen, tax is a joyride at Alausa. Obanikoro is the name of a man on the Island and a place in the Mainland. Everything on the Mainland is made in Ilupeju, Ogba, Isolo, Agidingbi, and Oregun. Agbara is not on the Mainland, it’s in Ogun state, like Mowe and Ibafo.
Everything on the Island is imported from the Mainland ports of Apapa and Tin Can. The sound of Mazamaza and Okokomaiko can cure madness. Homes in Idi-Araba are waiting to collapse, thank God for LUTH; Igbobi’s Orthopedics is not too far away.
There is a Lagos state University campus in every Mainland corner; the main campus and a military cantonment are at Ojo. Musicians from Mushin and Ajegunle have monopolized the sympathy of poverty, while Egbeda and Ikotun get no pity. If eyes are closed in Agege and Iddo when a train passes, one can pretend to be in Grand Central Station. 3Gbagadans usually pretend to be on the Island, but Oworonshoki can’t get away with such lies. Ogudu GRA insists on being distinct from a conjoined Ojota, while Amuwo-Odofin calls itself Festac Extension.
Iju and Ojodu villages are hyped by estate agents. Ebute-Metta is an old Yoruba phrase: “A place of three shores.” It is a decaying dream of British colonialism and Brazilian architecture.
Most of the residents of Magodo and Omole are Landlords. Maryland is not a saint and Anthony is not a Village. Igando and Ipaja are playing catching up with the state government.
Ikeja is the official capital of Lagos. The State House is on the Island, where the real capital is. Lagos deserves a special status in the constitution.index
On the Island, money has relatives. Ikoyi and Victoria Island are twin sisters, posh from birth and wrinkled with age. Lekki is a distant cousin, taxing and full of fraudulent schemes. VGC and Eleko are wealthy uncles, isolated from others and always overseas. Nicon and Parkview are the pretty nieces with feigned American and British accents. Oniru and Elegushi are the nephews from the village, who recently found wealth and arrogance. Ajah is the Step-sister, giving birth to children she can’t feed. Jakande and Igbo-Efon are broke In-laws, hardworking but always in need. Ibeju-Lekki and Epe are the Jilted aunts, feeding on promises and searching for suitors. Obalende is the lost brother without a mind, thought to be dead. Eko, Idumota, and Marina are Triplets of Royal descents, with trade on their minds, and power between their legs. Maroko is the baby that was aborted at Midterm. Makoko is the dirty bastard that wouldn’t disappear. Eko Atlantic City has recently left the incubator, hoping to survive. Many other siblings are just occupying space and causing traffic jams on the Island of the rich.
This is how I know I’m not on the Island: service attendants begging for money; Lastma officials lurking behind traffic lights; Dunghill switch is everywhere, and I can’t get an Iota of decency.
Source... Lazyreporta
Nice one. 1 Like |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by killuminati(m): 4:28am On Oct 04, 2018 |
@ Lazyreporta, wetin Obalende do you na. A beg change that description of my hood o. Abi you forget say name there State House dey ni? Nice write anyways 1 Like |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by maxbj(m): 4:40am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Nice write up |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by meobizy(f): 4:48am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Lazyreporta: Lazyreporta is back again.
Who missed me here?
In response to your signature, it doesn't. |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by JustSynergy(m): 4:57am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Very nice write-up 1 Like |
|
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by akeentech(m): 5:10am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Awesome 1 Like |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by emmie14: 5:11am On Oct 04, 2018 |
spartoo: Really, I do not know what to make of this write-up: Whether it's fun or begging for attention.
mental evaluation is imminent then 5 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by gaby(m): 5:12am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Lazyreporta: On the Island of the affluent in Lagos, I rarely hear aircraft buzzing in the sky, except the posh helicopters of the busy rich. The airport and flight noise don’t affect the airspace, it only devalues the land.
The rich pretend to pray, but God is on the Mainland, land on the island is too expensive to build many worship centers.
The Island was not built for Beer. It is the hub of champagne, spirits, and wines. Beer is for the road, an appetizer bottled on the Mainland.
The Mainland is crowded with families. Life on the island has no friends. Everything is cash or ‘waka’. The roads are expensively tolled, the schools are US ‘Dollard’, and a smile might cost some ‘Nairas’.
The Island expands while the Mainland remains the same. Under neon lights, millions of Mainland ‘ants’ trample on the Third Mainland Bridge into the Island of their dreams. Many die on the bridge, many earn a kobo, and many rob the others. 1
The Island goes to the Mainland, only to fly. Life on the mainland has many tribes. Bad roads and traffic jamborees in Enugu suburbs like Ago and Okota would eventually pursue ‘Omo Igbo’ to the East. The smart ones live in Yoruba neighborhoods, like itire, with Chinese constructed drainages. Sharp guys have moved into Surulere, the Governor’s neighborhood and the best place to drink. The number of youths in Festac makes one wonder if they ate their parents for dinner.
Ketu is a gang of Yoruba women hustling to breathe. Ikorodu can be great if it gets a bridge into the island. Yaba is the link between books, Aristos, ‘White House’ and an infamous Psyche ward (Yaba-left).yaba
Sex is on Allen, tax is a joyride at Alausa. Obanikoro is the name of a man on the Island and a place in the Mainland. Everything on the Mainland is made in Ilupeju, Ogba, Isolo, Agidingbi, and Oregun. Agbara is not on the Mainland, it’s in Ogun state, like Mowe and Ibafo.
Everything on the Island is imported from the Mainland ports of Apapa and Tin Can. The sound of Mazamaza and Okokomaiko can cure madness. Homes in Idi-Araba are waiting to collapse, thank God for LUTH; Igbobi’s Orthopedics is not too far away.
There is a Lagos state University campus in every Mainland corner; the main campus and a military cantonment are at Ojo. Musicians from Mushin and Ajegunle have monopolized the sympathy of poverty, while Egbeda and Ikotun get no pity. If eyes are closed in Agege and Iddo when a train passes, one can pretend to be in Grand Central Station. 3Gbagadans usually pretend to be on the Island, but Oworonshoki can’t get away with such lies. Ogudu GRA insists on being distinct from a conjoined Ojota, while Amuwo-Odofin calls itself Festac Extension.
Iju and Ojodu villages are hyped by estate agents. Ebute-Metta is an old Yoruba phrase: “A place of three shores.” It is a decaying dream of British colonialism and Brazilian architecture.
Most of the residents of Magodo and Omole are Landlords. Maryland is not a saint and Anthony is not a Village. Igando and Ipaja are playing catching up with the state government.
Ikeja is the official capital of Lagos. The State House is on the Island, where the real capital is. Lagos deserves a special status in the constitution.index
On the Island, money has relatives. Ikoyi and Victoria Island are twin sisters, posh from birth and wrinkled with age. Lekki is a distant cousin, taxing and full of fraudulent schemes. VGC and Eleko are wealthy uncles, isolated from others and always overseas. Nicon and Parkview are the pretty nieces with feigned American and British accents. Oniru and Elegushi are the nephews from the village, who recently found wealth and arrogance. Ajah is the Step-sister, giving birth to children she can’t feed. Jakande and Igbo-Efon are broke In-laws, hardworking but always in need. Ibeju-Lekki and Epe are the Jilted aunts, feeding on promises and searching for suitors. Obalende is the lost brother without a mind, thought to be dead. Eko, Idumota, and Marina are Triplets of Royal descents, with trade on their minds, and power between their legs. Maroko is the baby that was aborted at Midterm. Makoko is the dirty bastard that wouldn’t disappear. Eko Atlantic City has recently left the incubator, hoping to survive. Many other siblings are just occupying space and causing traffic jams on the Island of the rich.
This is how I know I’m not on the Island: service attendants begging for money; Lastma officials lurking behind traffic lights; Dunghill switch is everywhere, and I can’t get an Iota of decency.
Source... Lazyreporta
Wonderfully done... Applause.. 2 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by nwibo2018: 5:44am On Oct 04, 2018 |
This is awesome. More of this brother. It's both educating and entertaining. Love it! 2 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Justiceleague1: 5:47am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Eko ile,Lagos city.... Meanwhile,live in Oshogbo |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by princemedico: 5:47am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Nice read. A shift from the regular nonsense that have always graced the front page. 2 Likes |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by matrixme(m): 6:09am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Oh. You're still stuck in this Island-mainland dichotomy in 2018. Like that useless Yoruba movie female actress that said island folks deserve to start giving passport to folks on the mainland. The Western world is fading away and they are jostling for wild, untamed Africa, all their best cooperations and global brands, yet some unnamed blogger is lucky to have a place to squat in a 2by2 sized room, somewhere in Lagos to write rubbish and paste on the Internet. Free 10mb internet allows for such wonders these days... |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by oceandivee(m): 6:12am On Oct 04, 2018 |
. |
Re: Think You Know Lagos well Enough? (photos) by Nobody: 6:22am On Oct 04, 2018 |
Lazyreporta:
Thanks Did you compose this yourself or you copied it? |
|