Sam2310:
according to OP. She passed away last year February.
Marriage26, na so ba?

God bless you my brother.. some of our people here couldn't differentiate between "Earlier year " and "early this year"...

megareal:

He skipped some link words but from my understanding, his mum passed away last year or previous. The first excuse was that he couldn't get married so soon after his Mum's death and he waited......

Good you read well and understood....

Thanks to everyone that came round...


But let me clear some misconceptions, I didn't bring this up here to convince my father or seek emotional comfort.. I have made my decisions, I opened this thread to show my fiance what is applicable and clear some doubts.And to keep record for my kids and other future purposes.


Now let me clear some misconceptions in the many comments.


1)

One year of my mum's demise ( some of us might misquote this English again, demise means that she had left this planet, I don't want to use the actual word) had already passed


One year done pass teytey abeg

2)

. My dad is very rich, I am not 0000000000000000000.000000 near him yet.


3)

I met my grandmother today (my mum's mother) and I narrated my story to her, I was expecting her to pick phone and called my dad and beg him, she didn't , she just called her children, and said, we are following him for marriage, she spoke with my in-law and told them they are coming. She told me my father never paid my mum's bride price.

4). Am not painting my father bad. He is a very good and nice man, But once he says something, you can't change him from it


Now here is it, In my lineage, they don't go to in-laws place or have cordial relationship with them. Women are generally seing as piece of paper, I did lots of works to remove this ideology from my brain cos it's what we grew up to see.


On my father's part, it's more of ideology, it's more of believe system. He also advise one of my female siblings to just get Belle, even if it's for married man cos men are scarce now, you can see it's just his own believe and ways of life... But you can't remove this from him.


We do had issue with course I studied in school, he rejected a very course close to medicine and surgery. I begged him to let me continue that following year, I will write Jamb again, he agreed, I did and passed till I entered 300level, I was still writing Jamb grin.

When I finished the course, he advised me to start law. I was so short of words.. After I had Bs.c in a medical related course, you are now saying I should go and study law. I prostrated and thanked him. I never went back, just picked up my business fully grin.


So to roll with my father, agree with him quickly, infact thank him the next day, then do what is on your mind and show him the result. grin



I will surely share my wedding photo here... Thanks to all.

adekaden:
Dear OP,
After reading your write up, I have two questions for:
- are you richer than your dad?
- I want to confirm if he has been controlling your life before now.
Thank you

Thanks to everyone that came round...


But let me clear some misconceptions, I didn't bring this up here to convince my father or seek emotional comfort.. I have made my decisions, I opened this thread to show my fiance what is applicable and clear some doubts.And to keep record for my kids and other future purposes.


Now let me clear some misconceptions in the many comments.


1)

One year of my mum's demise ( some of us might misquote this English again, demise means that she had left this planet, I don't want to use the actual word) had already passed


One year done pass teytey abeg

2)

. My dad is very rich, I am not 0000000000000000000.000000 near him yet.


3)

I met my grandmother today (my mum's mother) and I narrated my story to her, I was expecting her to pick phone and called my dad and beg him, she didn't , she just called her children, and said, we are following him for marriage, she spoke with my in-law and told them they are coming. She told me my father never paid my mum's bride price.

4). Am not painting my father bad. He is a very good and nice man, But once he says something, you can't change him from it


Now here is it, In my lineage, they don't go to in-laws place or have cordial relationship with them. Women are generally seing as piece of paper, I did lots of works to remove this ideology from my brain cos it's what we grew up to see.


On my father's part, it's more of ideology, it's more of believe system. He also advise one of my female siblings to just get Belle, even if it's for married man cos men are scarce now, you can see it's just his own believe and ways of life... But you can't remove this from him.


We do had issue with course I studied in school, he rejected a very course close to medicine and surgery. I begged him to let me continue that following year, I will write Jamb again, he agreed, I did and passed till I entered 300level, I was still writing Jamb grin.

When I finished the course, he advised me to start law. I was so short of words.. After I had Bs.c in a medical related course, you are now saying I should go and study law. I prostrated and thanked him. I never went back, just picked up my business fully grin.


So to roll with my father, agree with him quickly, infact thank him the next day, then do what is on your mind and show him the result. grin



I will surely share my wedding photo here... Thanks to all.

Kweensavvy:
This is what happens when you have a very possessive father. He thinks he owns you and can dictate who you should spend your life with and when. Some parents can make like so miserable for their children. When they push them to suicide, they'll start shedding crocodile tears. Oga follow your heart. Your dad will come around. Afterall i doubt his own parents restricted him this much.

Hmmmmm... Lolz. He only forms hard heart, when little things happen, nah cry cry person Ugo just see. I could remember some years back when mum was sick... Papa just dey cry around, nah we pikin dey beg am

Marriage26:
Good day nairalander,

I am a popular jingo nairalander but got to hide under this moniker...


I have been dating my fiancee for the past 7 years, she had met my parents and I have met her's many times . We planned to get married earlier year. But it was the year my mother left this planet, I informed my family I wanted to get married but they declined, saying, it must be over years of mumsy's demise before I can marry.


We've fixed introduction days 3ice and it got cancelled by my father, what's his reason?


1. NYSC: I was posted to serve in the Northern part of the country 3 years ago, I went to camp, but I couldn't cope with the weather and couldn't leave my business as NYSC won't guarantee me job and I don't have other option. I absconded from the service and faced my business which I saved profits in 7 digits in same year, God made me comfortable.

2: He said I should rather impregnate the girl (backdoor talk)



I am close to my late 20s, he already banned all family members as many depend on him from attending my introduction.

He cancelled my introduction without fixing a new date.

My in-law trust me and ready to release the lady to me as I haven't had sex with her since 2012 that we've been dating...


And Also, God had supplied all I needed for my wedding from A-Z.



Do you think this is a cogent reason?. I want to ahead with my wedding plans...


Kindly advise....Thanks

Good you have gotten advice. But Bros pls, can you introduce me to your business, i beg of you. You can reach via 07032909591

Thane:




Good you have gotten advice. But Bros pls, can you introduce me to your business, i beg of you. You can reach via 07032909591

Boss, we all learnt it here on NL when Nairaland business section was very hot and a no nonsense mod cos the section seems filled with many stuffs now. It's a business that boom in 2013, 2014, 2015 , thought many ran away in 2016 and faced coins but I stay put and it paid off...

Emescot:


Then why are you trying to break the family history, impregnate the girl, if that will make him happy

He should not break his family history but go against God's wish bah Issoryt it's like you need 24 slaps I mean just two dozens of slaps

Bros, pls go check your fertility asap, I don't trust that your dad, from the look of things here he might be diabolic. God will see you through.

Marriage26:




Boss, we all learnt it here on NL when Nairaland business section was very hot and a no nonsense mod cos the section seems filled with many stuffs now. It's a business that boom in 2013, 2014, 2015 , thought many ran away in 2016 and faced coins but I stay put and it paid off...

what's the biz pls

Marriage26:



Thanks to everyone that came round...


But let me clear some misconceptions, I didn't bring this up here to convince my father or seek emotional comfort.. I have made my decisions, I opened this thread to show my fiance what is applicable and clear some doubts.And to keep record for my kids and other future purposes.


Now let me clear some misconceptions in the many comments.


1)

One year of my mum's demise ( some of us might misquote this English again, demise means that she had left this planet, I don't want to use the actual word) had already passed


One year done pass teytey abeg

2)

. My dad is very rich, I am not 0000000000000000000.000000 near him yet.


3)

I met my grandmother today (my mum's mother) and I narrated my story to her, I was expecting her to pick phone and called my dad and beg him, she didn't , she just called her children, and said, we are following him for marriage, she spoke with my in-law and told them they are coming. She told me my father never paid my mum's bride price.

4). Am not painting my father bad. He is a very good and nice man, But once he says something, you can't change him from it


Now here is it, In my lineage, they don't go to in-laws place or have cordial relationship with them. Women are generally seing as piece of paper I did lots of works to remove this ideology from my brain cos it's what we grew up to see.


On my father's part, it's more of ideology, it's more of believe system. He also advise one of my female siblings to just get Belle, even if it's for married man cos men are scarce now, you can see it's just his own believe and ways of life... But you can't remove this from him.


We do had issue with course I studied in school, he rejected a very course close to medicine and surgery. I begged him to let me continue that following year, I will write Jamb again, he agreed, I did and passed till I entered 300level, I was still writing Jamb grin.

When I finished the course, he advised me to start law. I was so short of words.. After I had Bs.c in a medical related course, you are now saying I should go and study law. I prostrated and thanked him. I never went back, just picked up my business fully grin.


So to roll with my father, agree with him quickly, infact thank him the next day, then do what is on your mind and show him the result. grin



I will surely share my wedding photo here... Thanks to all.

I think the bolded is the main challenge your father has.



Your grandmum not making an attempt to even call him about the issue speaks a lot.

Wish you the very best in your marriage.