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I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by hybridblood07(m): 11:21am On May 22, 2019
She did the best thing ever..if I were the husband, I will not divorce her but love her more. Moreover, I will find out why she cheated and we will fix the problem. There are many issues that could have led her to cheat.
1.Maybe the husband does not satisfy her sexually
2. The husband might not have her time.
Amanee:
Not everything works out as planned, you should have also prepared for this outcome when you decided to confess... I think you should be more concerned with your peace of mind now that you've fessed up than any fake bliss you were enjoying. You did the right thing by confessing and if your marriage has to end for it, then so be it. Take this as a crucial lesson and move on
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Rugsoul13: 11:21am On May 22, 2019
Bible permit divorce in case of adultery an mind u committing suicide u heading for hell fire divorce is penalty for ur immoral act.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by omotoyossi(m): 11:21am On May 22, 2019
10mins pleasure ruined something it took u years to build.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by grandstar(m): 11:23am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

I'm proud of you.

You took that great leap forward and told your husband. You have that load off your chest. You're already becoming a better person.and better still, a much stronger person. You are making peace with your husband and God (Read Proverbs 28:13)

As regards your husband's reactions and actions, your best bet is patience and reasonableness. Your husband needs time to process things. He's in turmoil Many things are going on in his mind. Things 'heal' with time!

You too need patience. The enormity of s problem reduces with time. Imagine being the cause of a multiple crash accident. Your mind is in chaos You are wondering how you'll foot all the bill. You're hoping no one beats you up and so on. Fast forward a year and the accident will simply be a distant memory.

At present, the iron is still very hot. Emotions are high and rational thinking may have been thrown out throw the window. Imagine your husband saying those kids aren't his? Patience is key.

Let your husband inform your parents. It's inevitable. And it's another load off your chest. Your relations, friends and all will get to know. More load off your chest. You need to end the fear of people finding out lest it controls you. It makes you vulnerable, very vulnerable. That fear will haunt your life.

Imagine a baby mama who does not reveal she already has a child to her fiance. She will live in fear of her man fearing out. Even when married, she keeps up with the pretence she has no child outside to her husband. Would you pray to be in her shoes? Is it an easy load to carry.

Get stuff off your chest and start gathering your life together. What does not kill only makes you stronger.

In the event that your husband takes you back, have some say in the process. Ensure he has forgiven you and has thrown the past behind him. If not, he'll think has doing you a favor and might keep reminding you of your past action. Also, as you're a truly changed person

Start an exercise regime. Exercise builds morale and lifts your mood and you need this in abundant quantity. It will also put you in great shape which your husband will appreciate.and may even tempt him back grin

In the event things don't work out and he calls it quits, please move on (Read Ecclesiastes 3:6). Develop a strong character or men will take advantage of you. You're still young and can find someone new. Inform him of your past.

Set boundaries. No sex or inappropriate touching until marriage. If he says no, then it's "hit the road jack, don't come back no more".

Any suitor must genuinely love your kids. Some sterile men don't mind marrying women with kids. Anyway, watch out and screen out wolves in sheep's clothing.

2 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by hybridblood07(m): 11:23am On May 22, 2019
Nice advise. God will continue to give you wisdom. A sensible man will not divorce her but continue to show love and support.
But I don't understand why some men sleep with married women..... Is there something special about it bros?
faithfull18:
Hmmn, you should have known that the other guy you did it with will deny you when the chips are down.

For a guy to summon up courage to sleep with another man's wife, then he isn't responsible.

I feel for you, after confession, you get punished for the offence.

Just give your husband time, confess your sins to God and ask him to restore your home.

With God, all things are possible.

Learn from this and learn to keep your flesh under control.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Agugbadin: 11:24am On May 22, 2019
Don't take your life, you have cleared your mind by telling him calm down. You asked for forgiveness from man, next is to ask God to forgive you and leave it there.

1 Like

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by PrimadonnaO(f): 11:24am On May 22, 2019
rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Nice storyline BTW


What's the big deal? If you got your money ready, you get your house in a day...clean and move in a total of 48hours.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by BlueAir: 11:25am On May 22, 2019
JasonScoolari:
Bro, I am tired of this Marbella003 case, I gave her my best advice and she reported me which got me a 1week ban as a reward.

Let her continue enjoying young dick.
grin why'd she report u
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Deapexboy(m): 11:25am On May 22, 2019
Beckham14:
When you were spreading your legs like blue band you never thought of the love you had for that innocent man who put a roof over your head, you never thought of the "marriage" you wish to protect, Now you have lost the trust your parents had for you, and might as well lose the love of your kids when your "ex" husband tells them how promiscuous their mother is and how adventurous she can be with the dick in an hotel room.
Some mistakes are avoidable and you don't have any excuse to give for this silly mistake you brought upon yourself.
May God bless that your "ex" husband for handling that heart shattering news with such calmness, not all men can wait till you finish your sexcapdes without registering some thunderous blows on your face.
The m0ron who fuucked you like a cheap slut has dump you like a piece of trash.
Before you think of killing yourself by yourself, take those innocent children to your parents. I won't stop you from doing what you feel best for you, After all, you didn't seek for our opinions when you wanted to collect the dick.
Put yourself together and accept your fate.
Rest well.


Bitter Nigerian Truth

1 Like

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Deapexboy(m): 11:26am On May 22, 2019
hybridblood07:
She did the best thing ever..if I were the husband, I will not divorce her but love her more. Moreover, I will find out why she cheated and we will fix the problem. There are many issues that could have led her to cheat.
1.Maybe the husband does not satisfy her sexually
2. The husband might not have her time.


Wonderful Nigerians

2 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Oyindidi(f): 11:28am On May 22, 2019
Some secret no supposed leave our heart. Now you have messed up your life by yourself. I'll advice you go to God in all sincerity and ask him to help restore your marriage.

3 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Olufemiolaolu(m): 11:29am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.
Do you xpect him to cuddle you?
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by svc1(m): 11:30am On May 22, 2019
If you had followed this thread, you would understand that the said lady is not repentant of her atrocity. Remember she said she craves for more sexual pleasure from her colleague and also stalks him on SM.
Now to my own opinion. A married woman won't sleep with another man that is not her husband, if she's still sexually attracted to her husband.. in short women are not built that way. Before a woman sleep with a man that's not her spouse, it takes a whole lot of emotional attachments to give in.. she practically burns out and gives in.. But when she does, there's no going back. Its like Sisqo just went lose on her emotion..
The said poster is not sexually attracted to her husband in the first place, so it's easy for her to give into sexual advancement from men she's sexually attracted to because if she continues in that same marriage, she would just be a shadow of herself, and the husband "go take her eyes see sometin".
I would advice you stick with the divorce, get a good lawyer to defend you and fight for u and ur kids (child support is very importanter).
In future try to have a good rapo with ur ex hubby for ur children's sake..

No one should blame u, U are not attracted to old men shikena.. U married him cos he was ready and d men ur age weren't ready to settle down..

1 Like

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Kelechiicharles: 11:30am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.
madam u need counseling and serious advice on what to do, their are d spiritual aspects and the physical. If u have genuinely repented God will forgive u and restore ur home if u care u can reach me on this line 08059709977 for counseling and some prayers to make. The bible say the heart of the king belongs to God and he turns to where ever pleases him. God will turn the heart of ur husband to ur direction in Jesus name
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by OCtheKing: 11:31am On May 22, 2019
[An adulterous woman never wins anywhere not only in Nigeria. U re a fucking hoe author=Vyolet post=78313573]



OP, herein lies the best advice for you.

1. He may come back to you once he is calm but be rest assured that things will never be the same again no matter how much you try.

2. Take it as the consequence of the destructive act, an adulterous woman never wins in Nigeria, you have laid your bed, lay on it.

3. Pick the pieces of your life in time, whatever happens in the end, life goes on.[/quote]
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by alfajohn: 11:32am On May 22, 2019
rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.




Traffic generating gimmicks. To excite the gullible. Well all is fair in war.
Nice storyline BTW
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by INTEGRITYA1(m): 11:35am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

Dear Sister, this is not the end, don't take your life. The dead has been done and it's quite unfortunate; but you can still get over this difficult and urgely situation.

I salute your courage because what you just did to confess such to your husband, numbers of ladies/women out there are doing worst without remorse or feeling bad.

My suggestions.
Be careful with your own relatives you're looking up to for solution, if the situation is later settled; hardly will the stigma be erazed from their side.

If possible, don't discuss it with your husband relatives because they will discourage him further.

Your husband friends, among friends there are/is friend; so if you are very sure of one or two among his friends, they can help out or else stay away from them.

Religious body
If your pastor or imam is a matured individual they can help.

Not the type of pastor you will confide in and will later go to podium and start saying God use him to sort so so and so issues even he will not mention names; it's capable of causing further damages.

Be careful and be sensitive of people you're looking up to.

If it's ok by you, I don't mind to volunteer and meet with your husband to plead on your behalf.

Above all, this is not the end you can overcome this situation.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by cornel994(m): 11:35am On May 22, 2019
Beckham14:
When you were spreading your legs like blue band you never thought of the love you had for that innocent man who put a roof over your head, you never thought of the "marriage" you wish to protect, Now you have lost the trust your parents had for you, and might as well lose the love of your kids when your "ex" husband tells them how promiscuous their mother is and how adventurous she can be with the dick in an hotel room.
Some mistakes are avoidable and you don't have any excuse to give for this silly mistake you brought upon yourself.
May God bless that your "ex" husband for handling that heart shattering news with such calmness, not all men can wait till you finish your sexcapdes without registering some thunderous blows on your face.
The m0ron who fuucked you like a cheap slut has dump you like a piece of trash.
Before you think of killing yourself by yourself, take those innocent children to your parents. I won't stop you from doing what you feel best for you, After all, you didn't seek for our opinions when you wanted to collect the dick.
Put yourself together and accept your fate.
Rest well.

why all these venom?
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by kamez(m): 11:36am On May 22, 2019
nairalanders will be putting people into trouble........


whoever adviced u to confess to ur husband, is a witch sent to destroy ur marriage....


you cheated on him and u regretted, u were sorry. all u needed to do was to change ur ways and make sure u never cheated on him again.... but instead, u listened to crazy nairalanders and their yeye advice....


I am a man and I am telling u that as a man, I can never ever ever forgive a woman who cheats on me, not even if Jesus Christ pays me a personal visit...

don't bother to tell me if u cheat on me, it's better u just change and pray that I don't find out about it.... because whether u tell me, or I find out by myself, it will still have the same outcome and that is DIVORCE!!!

2 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Ryabcool(m): 11:36am On May 22, 2019
sisisioge:
Chai! You confessed! Lordylordy!

I always knew you weren't much of a bright woman, didn't know it was this bad. Well, take heart. Remember he wasn't so appealing to you before now. Simply gather yourself together and forge ahead.

You will be fine last last.
Chai! make I no see any post of you condemning a cheating man again o. See as una dey show empathy to a cheating wife but go all guns blazing on men. Even telling her she shouldn't have confessed and kept deceiving the man.

At the end of the day, it's obvious women are just as guilty of the nasty sheit they accuse men of. We are all hypocrites.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by JasonScoolari: 11:38am On May 22, 2019
BlueAir:
grin why'd she report u
Maybe my comment rendered her wet adulterous pussy dried. grin
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by freeDR(m): 11:38am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.
Why not just die and rid the planet of another bumbling fool like you?
slowpoke. What were you thinking when you went ahead to tell your husband?
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Nobody: 11:38am On May 22, 2019
sharpsharp:


Suicide is not the way out of this. You said the truth and your conscience is cleared of guilt.
You have inner peace of confessing the wrong you did. Your husband's decision is irrational. God knows your heart and He alone will make your husband reason rationally and forgive you. Learn not to rely on man and suicide is definitely not a way out rather it will cause pain to your kids, family and friends. Pray and hope your husband change his mind. If he is without sin let his conscience be the judge. Remember the story in the bible of the woman caught in adultery, nobody was bold enough to cast the first stone grin
Be happy #saynotosuicide

It is not right to castigate the husband for his action. He's human and he's free to reason out whatever he thinks is good for HIS LIFE.

Praying to God to manipulate his mind in favor of the woman is not fair either.

He's human - and not a robot. He should be entitled to his decisions and consequences.

Even in the bible, the only reason God permits divorce is on the terms of infidelity. Right?

Should we be fair to that woman and be prejudice the man just coz the woman is the one on Nairaland?

That won't be fair!

I feel for her, but we need to tell her to face the reality & accept whatever decision that man thinks is right for HIS LIFE.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by OCtheKing: 11:39am On May 22, 2019
[quote author=Vyolet post=78313573]



OP, herein lies the best advice for you.

1. He may come back to you once he is calm but be rest assured that things will never be the same again no matter how much you try.

2. Take it as the consequence of the destructive act, an adulterous woman never wins in Nigeria, you have laid your bed, lay on it.

3. Pick the pieces of your life in time, whatever happens in the end, life goes on. An adulterous woman never wins anywhere not only in Nigeria. U re a bleeping hoe
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Wettoid123: 11:42am On May 22, 2019
Evil woman, ashawo,free area,,,u are not f8t to be in that house
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by babadee1(m): 11:42am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

Telling your husband was a foolish mistake. Tell God your faults and let Him assuage your guilty conscience. Your husband can do nothing for you now. You've blown it with him.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by ICONgold(m): 11:48am On May 22, 2019
This is the first right step you have taken for both of you to heal. your husband reaction is so good and a testament to the fact that he loves you dearly, another man would have kept quiet, accept your plea and sentence you to a life time of systemic pains. Dealing ruthlessly with you and cheating to your face. Leave him, continue to beg him, call your parents before hand and let them know. Continue to beg, send people he respects but be selective in your choice of people to tell too.

Give him time to heal. Accept all the blame and don't blame anything or anyone.

He will eventually forgive you. If he doesn't you will find happiness and peace with time.

I told you in my first comment that the guy you cheated with will never stand by you or accept you if your husband divorce you.

Congratulations for telling him, when he eventually forgive you, you will hardly want to tore this path again.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Nobody: 11:50am On May 22, 2019
Super story. But your husband is nice. Me, I will pick up my pumpee and damn the consequences.
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Budline1(m): 11:50am On May 22, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

You shouldn't have confessed to that, no matter what. You should have just ended the affair and never do such again. The truth is always bitter. I'm a man and I know how most men think about this things. An ex once tried that stuff with me and I never took her back again. I hope he takes you back though but you'll have a lot of work to do to prove to him that such won't happen again.

1 Like

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Ifeanyie12(m): 11:51am On May 22, 2019
@OP, if your story is true, you did the right thing by going to your husband with the truth. It takes a lot of courage to do that and I applaud you for that even though you were hoping you could get penance from tears and remorse (something you shouldn't have anticipated). However, your marriage would never be the same again even if your husband forgives you and takes you back. He's going to suspect every move you make for the rest of your life, disrespect you sometimes, keep unusual late night's, enjoy other female company than yours, etc eye... my advise for you at this point is to live for just one thing; HOW TO BUILD BACK TRUST. A divorce would RUIN you
Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by bluefilm: 11:53am On May 22, 2019
That's men for you.

Men don't like hoes for a partner.

Men might play around with hoes, buy them gifts and all that.

But one thing all men know is that you should never ever make a hoe a housewife.

Women may accept a cheating partner; but men rarely do.

So if you're a hoe, try as much as possible never to let your guy find out.

Because once he does, the relationship is as good as over.

There's no going back.

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