I had to chip into this because the story reckon with me as i would be 30 next february.

All is not rosy and we are facing and confronting daily challenge as they come. With prospect of graduating with B.Tech @26, the nigeria school system internal and external conflict made it 28. Reason for that? Your guess is as good as mine.

With NYSC rounded up in march this year, for the first time, I realised the fear I have always anticipated in my final year. The fear of the labour market. The nigeria labour market is competitive that age discrimination had to set in.

I dont think any of us enjoy staying with our parent after that freedom and privacy we enjoyed in Nysc. But the reality, odd and logistics of surviving out there is very slim on your own.

So to those who see guys staying in their parents house as lazy or timid need to know its a different stroke for different folks. You don't judge a man by the number of times he falls down, what matter most is how many times he rise up.

Thank you.

Divay22:

No
I don't wanna believe this 11 times
I Celebrate you Man.

2003 I started writting Jamb, 2013 I finally got the admission.. I apply for remedial 6times, Al in this 11 years.. as I was about writing 100L exams unijos stroke with ASUU and I resumed 2014.. I applied computer science and was offered PHYSICS EDUCATION.. I graduated in 2018 February with 2.1..
i just heard that a guy here in Jos killed himself because he failed jamb today.. make them use me as example.. I HARDLY GIVE UP..
at a point I was like even if na MANGO AS DEGREE, I go read, so far na Bsc..

KelvinC1:

2003 I started writting Jamb, 2013 I finally got the admission.. I apply for remedial 6times, Al in this 1q years.. as I was about writing 100L exams unijos stroke with ASUU and I resumed 2014.. I applied computer science and was offered PHYSICS EDUCATION.. I graduated in 2018 February with 2.1..
i just heard that a guy here in Jos killed himself because he failed jamb today.. make them use me as example.. I HARDLY GIVE UP..
at a point I was like even if na MANGO AS DEGREE, I go read, so far na Bsc..

Wow
How about your parents, what did they say?

People are facing many struggles you can't imagine

I am still doing my Nysc, clocking 30 in 2021.... After my pop I will look for a friend to squat with and I know my story will change for good before my 30th birthday.

I really like this thread.

Jayloy:
People are facing many struggles you can't imagine

The Nigeria factor made it seem so, the economy is shrinking day in day out. The rate of unemployment is alarming and there are plenty graduates being churned out in our higher institutions year in year out. Where there's unemployment, there tends to be increase in social vices. Apparently, the issue of kidnappings we've been seeing here and there are being carried out mostly by unemployed graduates. No palliative measures in place to curb this instead they re rehabilitating and integrating ex boko haram militants into the society. Nigeria is just a fvcked up country.

Back to the topic, ppl staying with their parents @30 is nt wut they wished for, but then, the situation of things fascinated such. This life is just a mystery; if care is nt taken, one might lose his or her sanity while trying to unravel it. However, just continue to do ur best, pray to God, and i believe things will change for good real soon.

9ice piece.

9ice piece

FlyingTOMATOE:
First of, I would like to make a statement, ''time is demanding but self development is more mportant''.
What exactly are your fears? Time demands you hurry up as day and month passes by in unflinching arrogance. But have you take a minute to observe how each year you left behind humbly bow to self development ?

Look at yourself, you are not where you want to be yet but you have moved further past a stage you were years ago.
Look at all those years you were frustrated writing O'level like a Disk jockey every year on repeat, and jamb subsequently, before you were offered a course you never put in for. Look at all the people you have met, lives you have touched and the lessons you have gained. That is self development.

Self development will take you further than getting worked up by the FEAR OF 30 °°°. Thirty isn't a bench mark for failure neither is it a yardstick to measure achievements. If THIRTY meet you for your papa house, fine. If THIRTY meet you for your mama house, fine. If THIRTY meet you at your low income job fine. Just make sure your self development never stops
Work towards self development and ever other thing will fall into place

The Nigerian government system has affected it all. We should stop trying to find hope where there is little to none. No jobs, only being self employed is the way to go now. Does everyone has that capital or that skill? I think it's time ppl think out of the box and consider relocating to other countries with better economy and social amenities. It doesn't necessarily have to be USA or UK. That is a research everyone should try to do on their own before or after clocking 30. Go get that job in some other country. Try to gather some funds and relocate to a better place that suit you. My 2 cents. Peace.

Offpoint:
I keep clicking on the Leah thread and Glo or NL keep landing me here, I have no choice but leave my comment here:

St. Peter Who walked, dined and wined with Jesus denied Jesus momentary to save his skin in the face of impending danger. Later he asked for forgiveness and continued in the faith, but a northern teenager who had no clue where Nazareth is on the map decided not to use her head when it's required the most.
The released girls who denied their religion... are they not back practising it and still waxing stronger? God gave us brain for a reason.


.....
On this thread, I don't give a damn about my age as long as I'm on the right path...

precisely, Still living under your parents roof and eating their food at 30 is a beautiful thing.

Those above 30 still living with their parents will find solemn, consolation and comfort in this thread or my comment... get your sorry azzes out of your parents house go and crash in with a friend or get a room apartment away from your parents... this way your suffering will begin and the zeal to be successful will multiply by thousands fold.
Too much of free meals will make you incapable of thinking critically.

I'm out

you are actually on point with the above 30 talk but your moniker says otherwise

pressplay411:


There's something about the big 3.0 that puts a person on their toes. The Fear of 30 can really be such a burden to bear. What a generation we have found ourselves. A generation where teenagers are making 8 figures in earnings and are transforming the world.
A generation where even a 25 year old career person feels like an underachiever simply because of the Neymars and Wizkids that are his contemporaries.

When I turned 30, I sank into an avalanche of depression. I felt so lost, so underachieved, so disconnected from my dreams and ambitions, so off the radar among my peers. But I was already beyond suicidal. I had decided if not for anyone, at least for my mom, I would stay alive. I couldn't bear the hurt I would hurt her with such news. No, I did not stay alive because of fear of heaven or hell, I didn't believe in that again, I simply stayed alive, thanks to the woman that really is worth all the Mother's Days in the world.

But in the midst of all these misery of turning 30 underachieved, I was humbled. I was tamed. I evaluated my life, and was honest that I had failed on my own.
Some how, in the middle of it, Grace found me and I turned to God for Salvation.
The rest as they say is history. Today, this Psalm is so real to me, because in numbering my days, I found Wisdom when I turned to God.

Psalm 90:12-14
So teach us to number our days,
That we may gain a heart of wisdom.
Return, O Lord!
How long?
And have compassion on Your servants.
Oh, satisfy us early with Your mercy,
That we may rejoice and be glad all our days!

this was inspiring.

After reading all d comments above mine,am left with no option than to keep d house moving and exciting.
I have 2yrs left to reach d alarming 30. Educationally I was very lucky,coz I finish Sec Sch at d age of 15,got admission to study Chem Engr at d age of 17,supposed to graduate @22 but due to our strike culture graduated at 23,waited 4 1,yr b4 embarking for my NYSC,Passed out at d age of 25,Picked up d surviving job (private sch teaching) while still staying under my fathers roof,Exactly one yr later got a mini organization job outside my state of residence, though not my dream job,but it won't b a bad start either, considering d experience.dat gives me opportunity to get out of my fathers hut at 26 and 2day d story has changed.
Though there iz still a lot to achieve,but I bliv with self development my 2morrow shall b greater than 2day.
being 30 and still single for d ladies to me iz disturbing,but dat shall not b a reason for jumping into d arm of any Man,instead get urself ready for d kind of Man u desire through self determination.
Also for a Man @30 still Single,directionlesss and probably still staying under his parent,he should think of how to move out first,whether he is footing d bills or he is been taking care of,Yes it is not easy but has to find away of making it easy,

Divay22:

Wow
How about your parents, what did they say?

my wonderful sweet parents are alive, doing fine in Makurdi Benue state, if I was to wait for them, probably I could have stopped my education in SS2, I picked up the responsibility for my fees and I wrote waec and passed back then, I moved to Jos via my Aunty, stayed with her for 3months and I went solo on my own.. I TRAINED MYSELF THROUGHOUT UNIVERSITY, I even heard an extra year (spillover) because of two 400L physics, Phy402 and phy404, to read been tire me, the 2 courses are all second semester physics. I paid school fees wrote them and passed.. it got to a point that my mum was so concerned about me, she called me one day and said, Adoyii, even if we can't send you money as parent's, please you can call us to at least send you 1cup of garri from our farm produce, i laughed and I REPLIED HER with joy AND SAID, mama, that day will never come.. the day I will call you to demand for what to eat from you guys will never come, relax, your son is a good guy and a big boy.. good name is better than riches, I am not and won't do any illegal thing to Tanish your guys image ma'am, . I worked in 2 hotels in Jos as security and car wash man.. night shift in one week and another night shift in another week in another hotel.. LIFE IS NOT FAIR.. if at Last i no make am enh, then small ojoro and magomago dey this papa God waiting queue.. Sha GOD IS always ABLE.. ALWAYS.. let's never give up.. THANKS.. sharing our stories sometimes is more than giving someone raw cash..

if you know my father Jah Rastafari then you would fear nothing,even 30.

KelvinC1:

my wonderful sweet parents are alive, doing fine in Makurdi Benue state, if I was to wait for them, probably I could have stopped my education in SS2, I picked up the responsibility for my fees and I wrote waec and passed back then, I moved to Jos via my Aunty, stayed with her for 3months and I went solo on my own.. I TRAINED MYSELF THROUGHOUT UNIVERSITY, I even heard an extra year (spillover) because of two 400L physics, Phy402 and phy404, to read been tire me, the 2 courses are all second semester physics. I paid school fees wrote them and passed.. it got to a point that my mum was so concerned about me, she called me one day and said, Adoyii, even if we can't send you money as parent's, please you can call us to at least send you 1cup of garri from our farm produce, i laughed and I REPLIED HER with joy AND SAID, mama, that day will never come.. the day I will call you to demand for what to eat from you guys will never come, relax, your son is a good guy and a big boy.. good name is better than riches, I am not and won't do any illegal thing to Tanish your guys image ma'am, . I worked in 2 hotels in Jos as security and car wash man.. night shift in one week and another night shift in another week in another hotel.. LIFE IS NOT FAIR.. if at Last i no make am enh, then small ojoro and magomago dey this papa God waiting queue.. Sha GOD IS always ABLE.. ALWAYS.. let's never give up.. THANKS.. sharing our stories sometimes is more than giving someone raw cash..

I love this

Best1708:
I love this

God bless you ma'am

wow this thread has been inspirational and encouraging. well i would be clocking my big 30 in few months time. looking back i know i havent gotten to where i want to but am sure i would be there. its scares sometimes when i remember i would be in my thirties soon but i have this greater hope i woud be okay and thirties woud look good on me.

KelvinC1:

my wonderful sweet parents are alive, doing fine in Makurdi Benue state, if I was to wait for them, probably I could have stopped my education in SS2, I picked up the responsibility for my fees and I wrote waec and passed back then, I moved to Jos via my Aunty, stayed with her for 3months and I went solo on my own.. I TRAINED MYSELF THROUGHOUT UNIVERSITY, I even heard an extra year (spillover) because of two 400L physics, Phy402 and phy404, to read been tire me, the 2 courses are all second semester physics. I paid school fees wrote them and passed.. it got to a point that my mum was so concerned about me, she called me one day and said, Adoyii, even if we can't send you money as parent's, please you can call us to at least send you 1cup of garri from our farm produce, i laughed and I REPLIED HER with joy AND SAID, mama, that day will never come.. the day I will call you to demand for what to eat from you guys will never come, relax, your son is a good guy and a big boy.. good name is better than riches, I am not and won't do any illegal thing to Tanish your guys image ma'am, . I worked in 2 hotels in Jos as security and car wash man.. night shift in one week and another night shift in another week in another hotel.. LIFE IS NOT FAIR.. if at Last i no make am enh, then small ojoro and magomago dey this papa God waiting queue.. Sha GOD IS always ABLE.. ALWAYS.. let's never give up.. THANKS.. sharing our stories sometimes is more than giving someone raw cash..

I must confess, u ve got a big heart!
Your temerity n resilient prowess r 2nd to none.
Your zeal, courage n keen attitude towards success got my jaws dropped.
More strength to U bro...


To every1 reading this, trust me, age is simply a number.

Dont allow unnecessary pressures from family, frnds and your environment to deter ur JOY and put u into depression.

Dont allow people's views n philosophies to ruin your chances of concentrating on getting the best in life.

Stop givn room to unhealthy competitions regards your frnds n peers successes(this is the biggest joy killer).

Most suicidals are aggrieved with depressions of not meeting up or catching up with equals(mates).

Simply get yourself engaged in a meaningful stuff irrespective of the drops. Learn to add meaning to ursef!

Aim n aspire to be better than who you were yesterday(compete with no one, simply work on improving yourself no matter hw small).

Self development should be a priority(Learn, unlearn n relearn). U can do it without competing with any1.

As for the ladies, LIFE IS NOT JUST ABOUT MARRIAGE!
Think of adding values to yourself, heed to d above points, work towards being a better you daily, learn to review n make necessary editing on your requirements for a man(if u must!)

In Igbo language, an adage has it that: mgbe onye jiri bòò chi, ya bu ututu ya!. ___ur day start counting d moment u wake from sleep... Ponder!

Age shldnt be takn criosly, it's just a number.
My one cent all d same.

Godsgracee:

The situation you described is only suitable for those whose parents and siblings are independent (the parents pay their rent and takes care the rest children if any). However, if you’re the one who pays your parents and siblings rent, and also take care of their living expenses with perhaps your little income you will understand that it will be unwise to rent additional accommodation for yourself when you’ve not achieve any financial stability whether at 20, 30 or 40. People go through a lot, don’t just use your situation to judge others.

Responsible parents will have the minimal number of kids and at the same time plan their retirement.
People just want to Bleep anyhow without considering the consequences.

Raalsalghul:

Responsible parents will have the minimal number of kids and at the same time plan their retirement.
People just want to Bleep anyhow without considering the consequences.

You have point though. Things may not work the way they planned. They may have good plan at the beginning of child rearing, then down the line things may completely change especially in Nigeria where things doesn’t work properly. And also remember we have no control over who our parents are and the type of family to be born into.

Raalsalghul:

Responsible parents will have the minimal number of kids and at the same time plan their retirement.
People just want to Bleep anyhow without considering the consequences.

one observation I have seen is that no parent wants to be irresponsible. Parents who you think are irresponsible, deep inside them, they too are not happy being seen as running away from responsibility.
In my course of life, over the twenty something years I have lived, I have encountered matured people whose children saw as irresponsible; acted as if they are not ashamed of being irresponsible but lament when they are alone.

SKYloafFISH:
one observation I have seen is that no parent wants to be irresponsible. Parents who you think are irresponsible, deep inside them, they too are not happy being seen as running away from responsibility.
In my course of life, over the twenty something years I have lived, I have encountered matured people whose children saw as irresponsible; acted as if they are not ashamed of being irresponsible but lament when they are alone.

Responsibility isn't a decision. It is displayed through actions: consciously.
More reason why you shouldn't make excuses for these folks.
I don't know what's difficult about having kids in tandem with your finances and at the same time plan for old age.
Only exception are when good times turn sour.

Godsgracee:

You have point though. Things may not work the way they planned. They may have good plan at the beginning of child rearing, then down the line things may completely change especially in Nigeria where things doesn’t work properly. And also remember we have no control over who our parents are and the type of family to be born into.

@the bolded is the only acceptable exception. Funny enough, they are very few if not rare.
I've have one couple in my environment, managing and just getting by.
Guess what, they just had their fourth kid after 2 boys and a girl.

I have another colleague with just a boy and a girl.
Suspended child bearing to concentrate on finishing his housing project.
And he's almost through.
Hope you can spot the difference?

Best1708:
My heart often skip beat each time i remember that 30 is right before me,how i wish i can remain on this age scale for the next five years but it's not possible. Not easy being a single lady and also the firstborn of the family,frustrations and pressures here and there. But through it all,i thank God for counting me among the worthy.

we can marry, let talk about it, whatsapp 08064357013.