RATIONALLY CHOOSEN
CHAPTER TWO
This morning I wake up sohkdowns, I say unrealistic because honestly no guy deserves to be cried for the way I've cried for Michael in the past few weeks. I guess I'm just tired of this melancholy whenever his stature comes to my mind, whenever I think of how I could never get tired of staring at him. Michael was quite a catch, he was tall with a dark chocolate complexion and had the most amazing lips I've ever seen till now. He's smile was amazing, he's eloquent speech was to die for and he's sense of humor always swept me off my feet.
"I love him, no! I loved him." I find myself correcting my thoughts as I stare at the letter M on a bottle of 'mac Dowel' because honestly I can't determine whether what I feel for Michael is love or hate. I remind myself I deserve better as I head to the bathroom to take a shower while pondering on last night's conversation with Marissa on how I need to let go of the pain and move on. There are many reasons I call Marrissa my best friend but the one that stands out the most is that she's never such a one to judge me. " You know you keep wasting your beauty locking yourself up all day in this house right? " A question I literally didn't expect from her but I still found myself uttering an "I'm not complaining. " response as I tried my best to avoid eye contact with her.
"Listen Sabrina , I'm not complaining either but I feel it's time you moved on, you can't keep harbouring such pain in your heart." she said in such a calm tone one would think she's my mother.
"I miss him Marrissa , I want to hear his voice again, he's the only guy for me and I just want us to work things out, he's not perfect I know but I'm not either. " I said as I kept wiping my tears.
"You need to let him go Sabrina , the fact that he knows you're hurting but still not doing anything to change that is clear enough that he doesn't deserve you. For all you know he could be having the best time of his life right now." I knew Marrissa was right but my pride mixed with shame could not allow me to acknowledge that to her. A long moment of silence fail before Marrissa could break it by saying, "The world needs to see more of you sSabrina so go out there and conquer it " I smiled as I assured her that I would do just that.
I stare at myself in the mirror with so much happiness and contentment that I feel a boost in my self esteem. I notice how my short but decent black dress fits me perfectly one would think it was tailor made for me, my shiny black sandals make my feet look so bright and beautiful. I pull my hair back into a ponytail and grab my small black purse. To me black is more than just a color, it is an emotion, a happy kind and an all black outfit has the ability to make me feel like I am on top of my game even when I am as clueless as a baby.
I decide to walk to town as I think of which places to visit in the city. After fifteen minutes of aimlessly walking around town I decide to go into a bookstore to get myself a good book to read, something I haven't done since the break up. I turn to my right and enter the first bookstore I see, it's big with beautiful chandeliers quite fancy for a bookstore. A man walks up to me and introduces himself self as marius James, I smile because James is also marrissa's surname but I opt to keep this detail to myself.
"Sabrina Hollis " I say as I reach out my right hand to shake his.
"So how may I be of service Sabrina " I notice how his lips move when he speaks and can't help but wonder why I thought Michael 's lips were the best. I effortlessly convince myself that Michael 's lips are no where near Marius's well curved lips.
"I need something romantic with a women's fiction feel but not too dramatic. " I say, noticing just how handsome he is, I love how he's taller than me and how he's rocking an all black outfit, we definitely look like a couple with my corresponding outfit.
"I think I have just the right book for you, I just finished reading it and it's exactly what you have just described. " I hear Marius say and I just can't help it but like him the more because he read the book which is quite daring considering how most men shun the idea of reading romantic novels but this man standing next to me is quite open minded and oh how I love open minded men.
"I'll take your word for it then. " I say "so which shelf? " I smile as I wait for him to gesture his hand toward the shelf where I'd find the book but instead he tells me the book is at their other bookstore and will only be in later in the day.
"Just give me your line and I can give you a call when the book is in. " He says as he hands me his phone and I find myself typing my phone number while thinking how lucky I am that Mr handsome is actually going to have my line, "can this day get any better? " I think to myself.
An hour later I'm drinking coffee at my favorite coffee shop when my phone rings, I wait for my true caller application to identify the unknown number before the name 'Marius James ' pops up I pick up the call and utter a "hi Marius."
Marius: Hi Sabrina , are you anywhere around town.
Me: Yes, I'm just four stores away from your bookstore.
Marius: The Italian coffee shop?
Me: Yes
Marius: I'll be there in five minutes.
Marius hangs up before I can respond and thoughts start running through my head,

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