My immediate elder sister is being abused by her husband. Early in the marriage she lost one of her teeth while being beaten by him and it continued like this till early this year when he broke her hand in another fight with her husband. He has battered her and broke her hand in the process twice. The marriage is just nine years old and he has been abusing her none stop. The one that happened around march was so bad that my sister was already making plan to quit the marriage before he came begging with my uncle and his mom. I and my brother threaten him but he called us on phone and pleaded with us that he will never beat her again My dad is late and me and my only brother who's also married resides in the northern part of the country while she and her husband are in the southern part. She really wants to leave the marriage which my family is now in support of because of the beaten so she doesn't get killed by her husband but the problem now is how to go about it with four kids to cater for knowing fully well that child welfare doesn't work really well here and she can't leave any of the kid for him because of motherly love and my family are not well to do. Please, Nairaland land, I really need your advice on this because he just beat her again last night and it was a terrible beaten from the picture she sent to me. She works with a hospital and the pay is just 90k which is not enough to take care of she and her kids. Please advise a brother? Thanks.

You advised your sister
Your family advised her
Her neighbours advised her
Her work people advised her
She advised herself
I'm even sure at a point her husband advised her by himself.
Why do you think nairaland will make any difference ?
Or you want us to gather together on a protest Come your in-laws house make we beat shibaraba comot for him body?
Me I don't understand o.
We have coza and the slapping senators case already. With bbnaija on now e go hard o. Our hands are full

Make I sha drop one small wicked advice
You my brother be pvussy
Person beat your sister break him teeth and hand you still dey report
Person wey you go arrange boys make them dey beat every night from 6 to 6:30 pm till him brain reset.

Your sister has no excuse remaining in such a marriage. Between her remaining in the marriage with continuous beatings, and her quitting now with her whole body which is better? From your narrative the man is an unrepentant beater, is it when she is deformed that she will quit? Even if she is not earning much her life is more precious, she has to cut her expenses to suit her salary, adding up to whatever she may get from the husband. She had better store the pictures of abuse for her own defense.

Are you aware that no advice here given can resurrect your sister if her psychotic husband finally got it right?

Get her out of that house.
Our advice will only work if she's alive.

She's entitled to alimony and child support if she legally divorce him on ground of physical abuse. Don't worry!

Bros leave advice.

The next time he beats her.

Call your brother and you guys should come in unannounced.


Beat the hell out of him and make sure u wound him

For every time he beats her, repeat same and inflict more damage on him till he has sense.

The marriage will re arrange from there.

With 90k salary she can start a new life with her children if she really want to...... Men who earn lesser still feed 5 to 6 people.

Tell yr sister to go get a room nd Parlour self, worth of 200k and self her life there...... With her constant 90k salary she should cut down expenses, but if she want to die young she can remain with her husband.

Thank God. I see such red flag and I jakpa. Won't bear nonsense just to look right in d society.

You all in your family are very stupid. That is all I have to say. At least when it’s time for burial, you will find the money to bury her. She even has a guaranteed pay of 90k a month and she claims she cannot leave. What a joke of a thread.

2mch:
You all in your family are very stupid. That is all I have to say. At least when it’s time for burial, you will find the money to bury her. She even has a guaranteed pay of 90k a month and she claims she cannot leave. What a joke of a thread.

You don't need to abuse me and my family. We never knew that the abuse was that serious until this year when she spill everything out and how she has been enduring just for the sake of the kids because she doesn't want them to be brought up in a broken home

And when she's dead now,another woman will take over her children. She can cope with 90k nah.

Shibaraba:
You advised your sister
Your family advised her
Her neighbours advised her
Her work people advised her
She advised herself
I'm even sure at a point her husband advised her by himself.
Why do you think nairaland will make any difference ?
Or you want us to gather together on a protest Come your in-laws house make we beat shibaraba comot for him body?
Me I don't understand o.
We have coza and the slapping senators case already. With bbnaija on now e go hard o. Our hands are full

Make I sha drop one small wicked advice
You my brother be pvussy
Person beat your sister break him teeth and hand you still dey report
Person wey you go arrange boys make them dey beat every night from 6 to 6:30 pm till him brain reset.

One cold orijin for u.


If i were u op, I go personally go there with my goons go knack the guy better akpako. For every injury, the husband go collect double! I wicked for that area

U sister can survive with90k. She can even be attending to patients at home with minor health issues and be collecting small osusu by the side.
She is just scared of the unknown. Make her take that bold step and years from now, she will be glad she did. Alternatively u guys can keep calm until she is pummeled to death in the near future

I detest long story.....
What works faster... arrange boys to runnam.by the time them runnam Like four times with serIOus Catholic beatings he go code up.



Tit..for...tat!

Better don’t go and beat anybody for your siste that enjoys beating. If the man dies she will blame you for beating her husband and depriving her children a father. Face your own life and tell her to let you know when she is ready to leave. I am sure you men have your own problems in life. Just remind her that if she dies there, her children will end up in motherless home because even you are managing to feed.

Mod please push this to fp for more advice. Thanks

Donedealer:
Mod please push this to fp for more advice. Thanks

You have all the advice you need.
But let me help you call Lalasticlala.

A dead man tells no tales(James Hardley Chase)
Let her keep giving the children a Good home until the Anuofia will snuff life out of her.

Wonyi and thothermes please come and tell her how to watch “war room” and endure the beatings until things change. You know it’s just a hard time she’s going through nothing to break the marriage for. (Except Maybe when she is finally in the grave).

It's a pity you don't have a Dad, before my elder sisters got married, he sat their husbands down and with a stern face told them "nobody beats my daughters" he said it like 5 times for them to get his message, Op you and your siblings should bundle her out of the house, she can cope with 90k salary.

I am soooo angry reading this. What other advice do you need

LIFE FIRST Please!!!

Get your sister outta there ASAP!!!

Every other thing will fall in place.

Well...its either she takes what she has right now and leave or negotiate the opportunity cost of her death in the grave! Fooooirkking assssszholes abusing their wives since 170BC! And some idiatss won't let me continue to enjoy my peaceful Singleton bayi! Whew!


Pardon my French please.

the beating started early in the marriage and your sister still went ahead to have 4 kids? what happened to getting the birth control stuff? I'm sorry to say this but your sister is the architect of her problem and she stayed too long hoping God will answer her prayers and change him, but it's not too late though.


we had same fears for my aunt but since she left her husband, she has been living fine even with little help from family and friends without hoeing around

if a man can work to feed 5+ people excluding himself, a woman can do same

tell her to save money(if she has a job or business) and when she has saved a sizeable chunk, she can move to a state with a cheap cost of living(if she doesn't live in one already) and from there she can start her life. she will suffer and regret her decision early in her hustling but when things get better, she will appreciate her escape. tell her to put her children in public schools and teach them when they get back home and whenever they are free or on holidays, they can assist her in her business.


this is on of the reason why I always tell nigerian women to do family planning after 2 kids so they can wait till the 2 kids grow to a certain age(if they notice signs that the husband is bad)

Donedealer:
My immediate elder sister is being abused by her husband. Early in the marriage she lost one of her teeth while being beaten by him and it continued like this till early this year when he broke her hand in another fight with her husband. He has battered her and broke her hand in the process twice. The marriage is just nine years old and he has been abusing her none stop. The one that happened around march was so bad that my sister was already making plan to quit the marriage before he came begging with my uncle and his mom. I and my brother threaten him but he called us on phone and pleaded with us that he will never beat her again My dad is late and me and my only brother who's also married resides in the northern part of the country while she and her husband are in the southern part. She really wants to leave the marriage which my family is now in support of because of the beaten so she doesn't get killed by her husband but the problem now is how to go about it with four kids to cater for knowing fully well that child welfare doesn't work really well here and she can't leave any of the kid for him because of motherly love and my family are not well to do. Please, Nairaland land, I really need your advice on this because he just beat her again last night and it was a terrible beaten from the picture she sent to me. She works with a hospital and the pay is just 90k which is not enough to take care of she and her kids. Please advise a brother? Thanks.

Your sister own too no good. If in a nine yrs marriage with kids and all they do is fight, then they shouldn't have been married in the first place. Why not make them identify what their problems are, possible solutions, than advocating for divorce 'cause you heard your sister's side of the story. Some women are as bad as the men they end up with. At times, one person has to bend for peace to reign. You choose your fights wisely, not unnecessarily.

Your sister is the only one that can get herself outta this madness!
And to think she's wondering how to cope with 90k and 4 kids?
Would she rather the kids grow up without her coz that just might happen!
When she's ready, she'll leave.

2mch:
Better don’t go and beat anybody for your siste that enjoys beating. If the man dies she will blame you for beating her husband and depriving her children a father. Face your own life and tell her to let you know when she is ready to leave. I am sure you men have your own problems in life. Just remind her that if she dies there, her children will end up in motherless home because even you are managing to feed.

this is wickedness aswear!

Donedealer:

You don't need to abuse me and my family. We never knew that the abuse was that serious until this year when she spill everything out and how she has been enduring just for the sake of the kids because she doesn't want them to be brought up in a broken home

With the domestic violence the kids are continually witnessing, they are already being brought up in a broken home! Broken home is not when a spouse leaves but when the home is emotionally damaging.

There is something very funny people on this thread has failed to see.
How do you beat a man with thugs that has got more money?
Do you want him to call a war on you guys?
So the woman saying she can't survive on 90k a month with her kids doesn't tell you all funny people something about the man's status?
Even the op knows that what is keeping the woman in that house is money
Good Life,securing the future of her kids,securities,regards from people(oriaku) etc...
So op if you want to take your sister out of there bro,there is just one thing you can do;
NWANNE JEE CHUBA EGO!!!You dey look for who will shout eyaah with you ba?
Go find money my friend!

Donedealer:
My immediate elder sister is being abused by her husband. Early in the marriage she lost one of her teeth while being beaten by him and it continued like this till early this year when he broke her hand in another fight with her husband. He has battered her and broke her hand in the process twice. The marriage is just nine years old and he has been abusing her none stop. The one that happened around march was so bad that my sister was already making plan to quit the marriage before he came begging with my uncle and his mom. I and my brother threaten him but he called us on phone and pleaded with us that he will never beat her again My dad is late and me and my only brother who's also married resides in the northern part of the country while she and her husband are in the southern part. She really wants to leave the marriage which my family is now in support of because of the beaten so she doesn't get killed by her husband but the problem now is how to go about it with four kids to cater for knowing fully well that child welfare doesn't work really well here and she can't leave any of the kid for him because of motherly love and my family are not well to do. Please, Nairaland land, I really need your advice on this because he just beat her again last night and it was a terrible beaten from the picture she sent to me. She works with a hospital and the pay is just 90k which is not enough to take care of she and her kids. Please advise a brother? Thanks.

She should just leave and have blind Faith that things will work out for herself and are children. And even if it does not, any thing is better than her being beaten to death.

I'm sure there are NGO's in Nigeria that look after abused wives. She should take advantage of them.

It is important she takes pictures of her being abused and so on as evidence.

She lives in a state of fear of what he'll do to her if she leaves. He'll also not want her to go with the kids.

She should also seek the services of a lawyer. There maybe criminal penalties for such abuse. Or better still, get a restraining order preventing the husband from coming near her. , ,.

She should just leave!

sisisioge:
Well...its either she takes what she has right now and leave or negotiate the opportunity cost of her death in the grave! Fooooirkking assssszholes abusing their wives since 170BC! And some idiatss won't let me continue to enjoy my peaceful Singleton bayi! Whew!


Pardon my French please.

That sounds to me like Idoma

cococandy:
Wonyi and thothermes please come and tell her how to watch “war room” and endure the beatings until things change. You know it’s just a hard time she’s going through nothing to break the marriage for. (Except Maybe when she is finally in the grave).

In Mariah Carey's voice.

Girl I wanna know, why you so obsessed with me

The two situations are different.
Assault is a legal offence no?

Infidelity is a whole different kettle of fish.
I know there is no difference to you though

Richy4:



That sounds to me like Idoma

Na geeki sir.

I’m obsessed with you?

That’s very logical

ThothHermes:

In Mariah Carey's voice.

Girl I wanna know, why you so obsessed with me

The two situations are different.
Assault is a legal offence no?

Infidelity is a whole different kettle of fish.
I know there is no difference to you though