I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son - Family (8) - Nairaland
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| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by chris51(f): 6:53am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Please start bathing your son. Let the boy know he is your guy and guy to guy while house help pay more attention to your wife and the baby. Do not tell your wife. Call the girl and warn her seriously. Tell her you won't mention it to her madam but if it ever happens again, you will tell your wife and she will be sent packing. Be mature about it. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by chris51(f): 6:53am On Jul 16, 2019 |
chris51: |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Nobody: 6:57am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih: Why is it that people who write this kind of epistle always end it with *pardon my English*?? |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by lomprico(m): 6:57am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih: Ogbeni! He is just 8, you can still beat the demon out of him. Don't be a weakling, if u don't do anything about it now then you are a failure as a father. Did u see the thread where an uncle beat his 14 year old nephew for Stealing 3k from a neighbour? That boy will Never steal again. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Pearl05(f): 6:59am On Jul 16, 2019 |
genq: So what's your input to solve the issue at hand? You didn't see where he stated that the wife recently put to birth? Mr. Go to abroad. |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by daygee12: 6:59am On Jul 16, 2019 |
This was how 2face , Ubi Franklin started then, now i see the reason why i don't blame them 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by SendAbroad: 6:59am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih: Use DSTV parental guidance to set up passcode known only to you and your wife...that way you don't have to be carrying remote control "upandan". |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by miniziter(m): 7:02am On Jul 16, 2019 |
nicepoker101: I need nairaland.com to introduce unlike button because of comment like yours..... I know you were joking sha. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by newmoney133: 7:07am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Get the both of them to kneel down Beat them very well Seperate them for question First question your house aid in a different room then question your boy and stylishly let him think the housemaid confessed and even told you he started it first you will be surprised how your son will shout its a lie and will revearl the whole story tell him you will send the girl away so that he won't be afraid to talk. LASTING PRAY FOR YOUR SON ALWAYS,COUNSEL HIM AND DONT EVER NEGLECT BEATING IN RAISING CHILDREN 3 Likes |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by newmoney133: 7:10am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Get the both of them to kneel down Beat them very well Seperate them for question First question your house aid in a different room then question your boy and stylishly let him think the housemaid confessed and even told you he started it first you will be surprised how your son will shout its a lie and will revearl the whole story tell him you will send the girl away so that he won't be afraid to talk. LASTING PRAY FOR YOUR SON ALWAYS,COUNSEL HIM AND DONT EVER NEGLECT BEATING IN RAISING CHILDREN. |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Chiefochiefo(m): 7:13am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Oga just mind your business. It will save you some lives ok |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Nobody: 7:13am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih:If your son was a girl and your housemaid a boy you would have cut his preek with a sharp scissors. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Truthsbitter: 7:18am On Jul 16, 2019 |
man, your sons mentality about sex has been bleeped up by that bitch BIG time... it takes a kid the help of the SPIRIT of God to become broken away from such I tell you. talk to him, show him love (let him know he can always come to you in openness no matter what the situation was), watch him closely and pray for him ceaselessly. ..and of course in some situation don't spare the rod.  Don't ever think this is light o...or he is going to grow up to fvck women up either by fvcking up with their emotions badly (deceive them, lie to them, trick them play them, use them and dump them without breaking a sweat) or fvck them up by assault (both sexual and battering)... while you do all these always be confident, never show fear nor anger (in some situations you can deliberately show anger to instil fear and to show meanness but never show fear) otherwise you will do more harm while trying to set things right. (let the holy spirit direct you, if you have him, if you don't it might be very hard to get things right after all) take care bro |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by neyobills: 7:21am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih: I'm glad things worked out this way here are a few things I need to highlight 1.A seven year old boy should be able to bath himself,make him responsible by having him do that and also help you guys out with a few chores,assign a few chores for him that he would be able to manage to channel all that energy into something engaging so he can, get his mind off all that BS. 2.DO NOT tell his mom at least for now, there is no way a woman won't get emotional when she hears things and she will definitely escalate things and this will make the young lad withdrawn,you need to make him see u as his confidant so u can get more info in the future,besides u don't need things to escalate now because u yourself need time to heal as that event evidently got u broken. 3 Don't tell his teacher nothing about the event however u might go to the school for follow up and monitoring and perhaps tip the teacher(9ja tins)to keep an, better eye out for the ladies and monitor him well,i think that should do. This is just my own humble opinion though . Lastly to all those saying beating,they say experience is the best teacher and those of us who were raised by teachers and thoroughly beaten will tell u for free that beating does nothing but makes a child more withdrawn sometimes even rebellious as some of us were renowned to dust cane anyway,las Las Na cane go end am,in this age and time parents need to be totally unpredictable. |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Buffalo2(m): 7:22am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih:Sorry, but I will advice that you stop the "nigga" of a relationship and make it a father-son relationship as this may also affect the way he relates with older people outside and even his teachers in school. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Isiluv247(f): 7:24am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Like seriously, ur son can bathe by himself, my son is 5years and he can bathe on his own, I only guide him on areas of his body he has scrub very well and clean, I only bathe if and only if he wastes time and water in the bathroom and he is hurrying to school or probably he is not feeling ill then he needs assistance to bathe him, even when he is ill my son will still insist he wants to bathe on his own. Sorry to say this but the issue started when you allowed the house girl to bathe him, she must have been experimenting with your son in your absence, I don't like having househelps for one thing, do you know what they do in your absence? Is better you let her go before she does collateral damage to your home starting with your son. At 8yrs ur son is old enough to take care of himself and besides keep him occupied so he doesn't start developing negative thoughts. That's my own opinion. |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by doubleexplorer: 7:28am On Jul 16, 2019 |
There're two sides to fatherhood; the first being a FATHER and MENTOR, and the second being a FRIEND and COMPANION. This time, be a father, not a friend; your friendship should have helped to avoid this, but you had a totally wrong idea of what father-son friendship should be like. Your son, irrespective of his smartness, needs someone to put him on the right track and help him make the right choices. Be a man for once. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by tomju(m): 7:28am On Jul 16, 2019 |
The foundation of a child's upbringing is cardinal in raising them up properly. As a parent, how solid is your spiritual foundation. Are you are Christian? Do you study the bible with your family? Including your wife and son? I noticed you said maybe the maid taught him the "nonsense "! But I tell you who taught who anything is immaterial right now. What should be paramount in your life is how to get your son back. How can you do that? Beating him is discipline. He has to know that what he did was wrong. But it doesn't end there. You must make him afraid of something. Naturally, children are afraid of being beaten. Some of them would say , I dont want to do it because my mummy will beat me. You need to instil in him a fear greater than just beating. The fear of offending God. Teach him how to see God as His best friend and a real person. Teach him how to talk to God in prayer. Ultimately, when he is grown and you are not there or can even beat him anymore, the fear of offending that His friend would scare him from immoral ways generally, not just groping. No one was born with good parenting skills. You must learn it. Talk to your son more. Ask him questions. Teach him sex education. Tell him what each organ in his body is. What it can be used for, when he is authorised to use it. How he should use it then. Why he should not allow anyone to touch his privates, Instruments if you like. Not even his teacher in school, doctor or his siblings, maid, mom or dad. You noticed I included the parents. Yes, your case is not parental sexual abuse, however it does exist. Your best bet is to inculcate in your kids the moral discipline found in the bible. Let them learn to trust and have faith in God now, it's the surest way of ensuring they live a good life. Some may consider it old school, but the truth is, families that rely on God as their foundation thrives well more than families that lack the basic teaching of God's word in their home. The responsibility of taking care of him is yours and your wife's. It's a shared responsibility. I wish you well. I expect you to come here someday and testify that he is making progress in his relationship with God. Enjoy your day. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by ImaIma1(f): 7:30am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Fountainofyouth: Just be involved and observant. If you want to get a maid, get an elderly lady. Even with a maid, don't leave everything concerning your child for her to do. Spend quality time with your child. These times when mum and dad have to work to make a living, when you get back, spend time with them. It's also very important to pray that the only One that can keep them from evil will continually protect them. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by sammirano: 7:30am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Don't take this lightly! Our adoption of western child raising is destroying our very heritage. I suggest you let him feel your wrath with no support from anywhere else, let him realize it was very bad, and not through words alone mind you. Be firm and limits his freedom, in fact, I don't even know what to think, at 8!! 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by perforetti(m): 7:31am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Daisy17:Very lucky ooo The space between when my mum left till when my mother inlaw arrived was very challenging ooo. It's not easy raising kids. I thank God finally ✌� |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Nobody: 7:32am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Should I consider the father weak? Is the mother really to be blamed as a commenter pointed out? What really goes on around the house on a normal day? I mean, this guy is too small for a thing like this na.. I want to shift part of the blame to the weak and useless father. He considers himself a modern dad who want to gain the boy's love by been too nice and friendly at the expense of the boy's morality and future. Dear op, you are weak and useless. If you were to be my father, having the opportunity to correct me with rods and strictness and you fail to do so, thereby turning me into a monster in the society, I swear, I will kill you. Wtf!!!!!!! Imagine this o. Chai, parents of now adays are the reason why we have lost so much to civilization. I forbid a father like you. Tufia! 2 Likes |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Isiluv247(f): 7:40am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Buffalo2:please i advice you stop using the phrase "nigga" in your relationship with your son, it will have a negative influence on him, and respect will start diminishing fast before you know it so stop using dat vulgar language with him, u can regard ur son as ur best friend dats better. Let him tend start seeing you as a father figure and also a best friend instead. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by ImaIma1(f): 7:42am On Jul 16, 2019 |
perforetti: They are quick to say that women are lazy. One person made a comment saying "you married a lazy wife". My child is also 1 plus. I work on the Island and live on the mainland and I don't have a maid. The reason we are even coping without a maid is because my husband is very hands on and supportive. I can't say that for many Nigerian men. Having a maid is just extra help. People here need to stop shaming people that have one 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Nobody: 7:42am On Jul 16, 2019 |
This is the time you need the girl most, Don't send her off, This is what you will do to curb your son and the maid, Let your son and your maid know you're watching after them, Try this let the both of them see you re walking out of the home, within few minutes let them know you're just looking them from a far that you go no where, let them know you re suspecting them, do a fake camera all over the house too deceive, Don't try to get your son off smartness, smartness is natural , you can't change the smartness he will only pretend like he's not smart anymore, the thing your need to do is prove more to him you re smarter, don't forget to let the kid see you piping in the toilet too, with that the kid will have it in mind that you want too expose them and believe both of them will never try such again. If you send that girl your son will try such in a place you won't like and that might bring big embarrassment too you, imagine a principal calling you to discuss sexual issue with you. Sir the kid is in already just try too make them hate each other through tight watching . |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Bluntemperor: 7:42am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Young man do you want to know the truth,you are slack.let me be blunt with you and many ranting above:if your child is doing this at this tender age,what happens when he is 12 and 16.To tell you that your house maid has poisoned your 'child heart' seriously. when last did you share the Word of God with him? Many of you are now controlled by your children because you want to be like the 'big men' in Nigeria,claiming America.Now you are controlled by your baby boy and the house maid,!!. Correction of kids include scolding,so he/she would not repeat such and would know your position because his father will not take rubbish from him.many of you Parents would not control the children at home and in their Schools,you still want to dictate to teachers and school authority as well.i leave you with the words of God-Proverb 29v17. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by dfrost: 7:44am On Jul 16, 2019 |
1Sharon: Don't mind him. He should even be arrested for child abuse and slavery. 1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by crazygod(m): 7:45am On Jul 16, 2019 |
toyosi15:  u for just keep quiet. Y did u have to spew all that? It should have remained ur very own personal shameful secret.1 Like |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Midas01: 7:46am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Keep quiet if you have nothing meaningful to say. The boy who lives with us ( we don't call him a maid), has been living with us for nearly 3 years now and he came when he was 12. He came malnourished, had lice all over his head, didn't even know the alphabet but guess what? In less than 3 years, he now knows how to read a bit, he's not perfect and not close to perfection but his reading is highly impressive now. He just memorised 15 verses of the Bible as part of his school work and most of it he learned himself except for a few words I helped him with. We treat him like our son and we give him money which he saves and whenever he visits his mom in the village he gives it to her. My parents give his mom money too. One day he told us he'd like to go give the plastic bottles we no longer need to a woman who'll pay him money. So every end of the month he does this and the woman has been paying him money and he gets to keep all the money. He's made like 3k doing so. We don't beat him, and he mostly runs errands like buying foodstuff from the market and washing dishes only. So please, how is that slavery? Atiku: |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Nobody: 7:46am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Oga fasten your seat belt before he becomes a collateral damage to you, it's your responsibility to talk to him since he more mature than his age, I hv witness ds kinda thing in my neighborhood where a young gal of 12yr old is already having affair with a man who dey share flat with and when it was brought into light people where shock to see her defending the man at his 30s with a street language that shocked everybody including her parents. You need to understand that things are changing for good, it doesn't mean dat he picked it up from movie but peer pressure, environmental factor and also the biological activities supporting the growth and mental readiness of your boi made him hit a level he is meant to achieve at the suppose age of 18, I will advice you to be his PA or he appoint someone from the street at your own expense. Ka Chineke mezie okwu... |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Magdagascariens: 7:47am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Timih: |
| Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by Edet08(m): 7:47am On Jul 16, 2019 |
Hello bro, I’m a father too and I feel your pains. First, you need to understand that you’ve prioritized work and all over family. Had it been the other way round,you would have known the genesis of this behavior. If you spend quality time with your son, trust me he will be free to tell you anything that goes on in your absence. I had similar experience when growing up, couldn’t tell anyone cause no one was there. In fact I didn’t get that love from my parents. Spend time with your family, at least you’ve noticed it now. Talk with your son. If you must spank him for him to understand his wrong,please go ahead. Both of them must be punished. Instill morals in them. Don’t say they are too young. No. And please don’t send that maid away. You have a duty to mould her. I believe they can become better persons if you and your wife is willing. God bless you. |
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