Abbeylincson:

Your wife is circumcised. Forget all these things people are saying here.

When a lady is circumcised, what is the solution to it? Because they are liable to have painful sex

OBUKOMENA:
Do u know what? I sought help from one of the female doctors at my workplace; I gave her number to the doctor so she could call my wife and advise her on what to do. She got enraged saying I was telling people about her. I had to tell the doctor not to call again. My sister, in my next life, I am going to marry a prostitute I swear!

My man.

We've all vented. Its high time for constructive inputs. If there's life an a will to solve a problem, solutions will arise.

I have a few things to say and I want to assure you at the end of the exercise, you'll find the right path towards resolving this issue.

But first I have some questions to ask. If you don't mind.

PrimadonnaO:
One of the reasons I feel being single is the best way to abstain from sex is because I can't honestly see how two people who are attracted to, and love each other can avoid having sex for so long.

So, I don't know... @Obukomena, how did y'all do 5 years of courtship without sex? Was it a LDR throughout?

And then, now y'all are married and sex is still a challenge? Wow. I'm at a loss for words. But it really does seem your wife doesn't love you in the least bit... Because I mean, she's not even making any effort towards finding a solution to her supposed problem.

Feel so sorry for you. Ñdo.

What Grace. What oil. What pristine oil.

If God could grant us more ladies with this strong discernment and understanding.

Its like you're looking at his life thru a mirror. Cause you ended on the notion that's been evident throughout the thread.


" the unwillingness of the wife to fix the condition " which in itself is a pointer to deeper psychological issues within the marriage like power tussle, insorbordination, lack of both entities cleaving to be one.


There's no marriage here. This man didn't marry his wife.

elmagnifico411:
A lot is happening in marriages these days oh. Our mothers never had d guts to subject our fathers to these kinda life style. Even as submissive as they were, plenty of our fathers had things to do with out her women outside.

Having said all that, bruv, I doubt if that your child is yours. So u want to tell me that u blasted cums into her without thrusting deep, just with the top inside? That woman is really punishing u. Uncle, u don carry wetin pass u oh. If she could allow full penetration while a bay was inside her, how come she couldn’t when she was free and could carry her body well? Maybe some doctors in here have explanations to that, but in my own opinion she dey use your head. Walahi, the hunt dey pain me. U need to throw that gentle guy in you away and put on the full amour of a bad/sharp/mad guy. No Dey suffer dey carry church/religion cover face. Save yourself before it gets too late.

You spoke well my man


She's punishing him but he doesn't know or rather hasnt resolved to do anything about it.

Some women who are witches that are sent to torment men in marriages act this way, but many men don't know.


If I were him, even before medical psychosis, I'll do a thorough spiritual checkup on the so-called wife.

Better late, than never.

Why should a person who has a problem rant when professional help was sought to help them deal with that problem, if it isn't a convenient problem to retain for them? That's a massive red flag right there.



Good men have suffered

healthserve:



What Grace. What oil. What pristine oil.

If God could grant us more ladies with this strong discernment and understanding.

Its like you're looking at his life thru a mirror. Cause you ended on the notion that's been evident throughout the thread.


" the unwillingness of the wife to fix the condition " which in itself is a pointer to deeper psychological issues within the marriage like power tussle, insorbordination, lack of both entities cleaving to be one.


There's no marriage here. This man didn't marry his wife.

In all honesty. And he sounds so unhappy. I feel for him.

PrimadonnaO:


In all honesty. And he sounds so unhappy. I feel for him.

I share the null emotions. I'm picking something in my spirit about this. Let's wait for him to open up more as collectively we can help steer him in positive direction.


See why the scripture says deep calls unto the deep and not to be unequally yoked with people? Ten years sexual relations against a virgin is a no-no for me especially with the male as the virgin. If the reverse was the case, its a different issue entirely.


There's deliberate torture here or a lack of zeal to deal with a serious condition.

It's a pity no one knows this guy's wife is a chronic lsebian.

OBUKOMENA:
I married my wife three years ago and we had a child two years after wedding. Before we married, we actually dated for 5yrs. During this time, we were on a no-sex-before-marriage relationship.

On our wedding night, I realized there was something wrong with either of us, cos the sex didnt go well. I'd thought it was the fatigue caused by the day's activities. Subsequently, I noticed that my wife was always shouting and withdrawing from sex each time I penetrated her. I asked her why and she said the sex was painful.

My wife had been in a sexual relationship for almost 10yrs before I met her. I, on the other hand, had only had sex once in my 37 yrs (age I married). When my wife and I agreed to the no sex before marriage thing, during our period of dating, I started looking forward to our wedding night. I started fantasising on what sex would be like with my wife. I longed for sex with her....

How did she become pregnant? Ever since we got married, the kind of sexual intercourse we practised was one in which I would have to penetrate her ONLY with the tip of my joystick, or She pushed me away. Achieving full penetration was a mirage for me and it was frustrating and not enjoyable at all! I could not achieve that full penetration cos to her, it was paining her. That was how we had our sexual intercourse until she informed me she was pregnant. I didn't question the ownership of the pregnancy cos we are both Believers. I must sincerely say that it was DURING her pregnancy that I enjoyed sex with her. It was the period she allowed me to achieve that normal, full penetration I craved for. It was the period she was making those sounds typical of an intercourse.
We both paused sex until 3 months after childbirth.


From the time we resumed sex up till now, matters have become worse. This time around, no partial nor full penetration. All she wanted was for me to just rub my joystick around her vagina and she would cum. This, to me, wasn't my definition of sex. It's a frustrating and nightmarish experience. The sex that I so longed for It now looks like I am married to a woman without a vagina. This situation is killing me softly. I am dying inside. I don't know who to discuss this sensitive issue with for advice. Worse still, She told me bluntly that active, penetrative sex is a TURN OFF for her. She prefers passive sex. My wife doesn't even allow me to kiss her anymore. I guess she allowed partial penetration before childbirth cos she knew if i didnt penetrate her at all, she wouldnt get pregnant. Is this what I am going to live with the rest of my life?

NB: I had advised her to seek medical help; she said NO and that she didn't see it as a problem. I also advised her to use Vaseline during intercourse; she insisted it was inimical to her health. All other suggestions brought before her fell on deaf ears.

Pls, I need advice on what to do.


Modified: Pls, don't just view and ignore. I need your advice. I brought this matter up here cos it's a faceless forum. I will not seek help on Facebook cos it's a sensitive issue concerning my wife

Gosh you made a big mistake, why will be dating someone for 5 years without sex Anyway I will advice you to tell her to go for a checkup if she refuse then the problem is way bigger than you might have think. She might be hiding something deep secret.
Just look for a side chick that will satisfy your sexual needs for the seek of your child rather than divorcing you wife.

healthserve:



My man.

We've all vented. Its high time for constructive inputs. If there's life an a will to solve a problem, solutions will arise.

I have a few things to say and I want to assure you at the end of the exercise, you'll find the right path towards resolving this issue.

But first I have some questions to ask. If you don't mind.

Go ahead and ask

OBUKOMENA:
Go ahead and ask

1. Tell us about the fights you've had in the marriage.

2.When it started, how many you've had. How far you go before you settle.

3.How long each party keeps from one another during fights.

4. Who makes more attempt to reconcile after quarrels.

5. How often you want to go together for an event, but one party decides not to go, and who most times does this.

I think your wife honey port is over stretched and she doesn't want u to know

I agreed with those comments that she's being hanged codedly.
Reason she allows you during pregnancy was because she can't get banged by another man during the period.

OBUKOMENA:
Do u know what? I sought help from one of the female doctors at my workplace; I gave her number to the doctor so she could call my wife and advise her on what to do. She got enraged saying I was telling people about her. I had to tell the doctor not to call again. My sister, in my next life, I am going to marry a prostitute I swear!

Sorry for your predicament, Op. Are you in Lagos? Like some people had earlier advised, sit your wife down, have a deep heart to heart discussion with her. Let her tell you everything you need to know about her past sexual relationships. If possible, note down everything on a piece of paper so you won't forget.

If you're in Lagos State, take the paper to Federal Medical Centre, Ebute Metta. It's just around Oyinbo Market by Railway Quarters. When you enter the hospital gate, you will see a building by your right, immediately after the Emergency Ward, named GOPC. Don't worry, just enter, pay for hospital card and wait to see the doctor. Please don't tell your wife anything about it at this point.

Explain to the doctor (thank God they're mostly female doctors in the GOPC) so you can actually feel free to narrate everything to them. Tell them that you want to see the Gynaecologists to book an appointment on behalf of your wife. The doctor here will then write a referral letter for you to see the Gynaecologists.

In FMC, Ebute Metta, you can't see the Gynaecologists without referral, otherwise I would have directed you straight to them. And their appointment day is always and only on Wednesdays, as from 11am. They attend to pregnant women in the morning, then other cases in the afternoon.

Please when you get there, try pick up a YELLOW NUMBER TAG at the reception and drop your small hospital card with them at RECORDS. It's directly opposite the reception, or you ask for direction. They have Ushers standing all over the hospital with tags "Ask Me, or Any Complaint?" pinned on their uniform.

Don't be scared if you see crowd, because they don't always last. When you see the gynaecologist, explain everything to him/her, then book an appointment to see them next Wednesday.

Go home, tell your wife to take you to the hospital, that you don't know how you have been feeling lately. Just feign illness. When she gets to the hospital, just hand her over to the gynaecologists and let's see if she will go there and disgrace herself.

Just leave her alone with them so she can be free to tell him/her everything, since she's not free to open up to her own husband.

She might need to run some tests. The hospital bill there is highly subsidised and the cost of their drugs too.

I hope this helps.

OBUKOMENA:
Because of this sexual ish, the marriage is driving me crazy. I am no longer happy in my marriage. I don't enjoy sex with my wife.

If your wife can go through childbirth and survive, believe me your pe.nis isn't causing her pain. She just doesn't want to have sex with you. You need to do some soul searching and get to the bottom of this. If there is no change in your wife you may need to separate from her. It seems to me that you were used for procreating only.

khia:


If your wife can go through childbirth and survive, believe me your pe.nis isn't causing her pain. She just doesn't want to have sex with you. You need to do some soul searching and get to the bottom of this. If there is no change in your wife you may need to separate from her. It seems to me that you were used for procreating only.

You're mouthed

khia:


If your wife can go through childbirth and survive, believe me your pe.nis isn't causing her pain. She just doesn't want to have sex with you. You need to do some soul searching and get to the bottom of this. If there is no change in your wife you may need to separate from her. It seems to me that you were used for procreating only.

Spot on 100%.

.

Only 2 comments have hinted on the fact that your wife is a lesbian, she has been diicked for ten years that can last her a lifetime so she's over diicks, she is a practicing lesbian mister man, sorry for your predicament.

OBUKOMENA:
Very good points, bro. The urge for sex with her is gradually dying. Because of that, I stay 4-5 wks without nearing her cos it's going to be same style, same frustrating experience, no kissing, etc. Na the build-up of the urge dey make me go near her again. And guess what? I have a high libido. Imagine someone who had had sex only once before marrying at 37. Hmmm?

Though I'm yet to get married, issues about sex must be discussed by would be couple, in other to know if both are sexually compatible. Saying yes to no sex before marriage to me is a scam, a man that has high libido should also look for same lady and vice versa. Sex is very important in marriage. I will advise you sit her down and talk with her, that her action may lead you to commit adultery

So ur wife want to be doing celibacy yeye thing abi?
Well
Guy take it easy, and follow these steps.
1; invite ur wife into your room and start a blunt discussuon looking directly into her eyes,
No look elsewhere,
2;ask her the cause of her actions and tell her the adverse effect of what she does and how her actions as wife may ruin the marriage.
3;let her know that you have start doubting thepaternity of the child forget the child look like u syndrome na you top am.
4;let her know ur decision to invite the two parents soon to talk the matter out
5;be ready to face the consequencies cos these steps may lead to divorce since you dont want to be having extra marital affairs.

Ur wife is not a virgin so sex after a child dont pain her,she is just punishing u.

Another option

Get a small phone and keep it at work,
Byy anoda sim card into it and start sending ur main phone message of will u branch my side before u go home
,will u come and Bleep me before you go home.
I miss ur dick
And do not lock ur phone ,ensure that ur wife is able to read this messages,this will.push her put for u to know if she is a retired olosho or changed one.

Watch ur back

healthserve:



I share the null emotions. I'm picking something in my spirit about this. Let's wait for him to open up more as collectively we can help steer him in positive direction.


See why the scripture says deep calls unto the deep and not to be unequally yoked with people? Ten years sexual relations against a virgin is a no-no for me especially with the male as the virgin. If the reverse was the case, its a different issue entirely.


There's deliberate torture here or a lack of zeal to deal with a serious condition.

It's both. She won't even kiss him. She doesn't care about his own needs and feelings, too. Her own husband!

And if she loved him, she'd be concerned about their sexual life, too. She would seek for them to bond at that level also. As a matter of fact, she'd be the one making efforts for them to see a therapist or counsellor.

Something's terribly wrong.

PrimadonnaO:


It's both. She won't even kiss him. She doesn't care about his own needs and feelings, too. Her own husband!

And if she loved him, she'd be concerned about their sexual life, too. She would seek for them to bond at that level also. As a matter of fact, she'd be the one making efforts for them to see a therapist or counsellor.

Something's terribly wrong.

Its beyond sex. Wait for him to answer the questions I asked him. Let's drill to its root together patiently and prudently.

Fountainofyouth:
Only 2 comments have hinted on the fact that your wife is a lesbian, she has been diicked for ten years that can last her a lifetime so she's over diicks, she is a practicing lesbian mister man, sorry for your predicament.

Lesbianism was the first thought that entered my mind but he said that she had an active sexual lifestyle with her ex. It really seems like the thought of having sex with him is a big turn off for her. Just imagine only letting her husband put the tip in or rimming her vagina. Lesbian or not, one thing is for sure, she is not sexually turned on by her man.

Darammliveth:


When a lady is circumcised, what is the solution to it? Because they are liable to have painful sex

She might not know she is circumcised.
She will need s3x therapy and you as the husband should have another game to play.
F0replay and lubricant are highly required here.

Fountainofyouth:
Only 2 comments have hinted on the fact that your wife is a lesbian, she has been diicked for ten years that can last her a lifetime so she's over diicks, she is a practicing lesbian mister man, sorry for your predicament.

you may be right but the op didn't state the kind of sexual relations she had in the past maybe he didn't ask her

Your wife wants to destroy her marriage
my advice is for you to take her to doctor. Give her order as a man. Take her to your doctor. If she refuses take further action to divorce her.

Life no get duplicate. Life is sweet enjoy it to its fullness

OBUKOMENA:
She had changed from her old ways. This is what I am going through, bro.

Go and buy KYjelly for lubrication...if after using that, she doesn't change, then dig deeper.. find out what's going on on her WhatsApp.

SendAbroad:


Go and buy KYjelly for lubrication...if after using that, she doesn't change, then dig deeper.. find out what's going on on her WhatsApp.

Lmao "on her WhatsApp "..

O .P, you have a whole lot of blame on this issue! come rain come shine,gender equality aside your wife is suppose to be submissive to you. At the initial stage,you should have stood your ground as a man by stopping her from being the driver of your sex life. Take it or leave it,you are a weak man,your wife is in charge.

Now eat this,your wife doesn't LOVE/FANCY u! Reasons below...

1, She wouldn't kiss u,why?
Because she can't stand you! Even virgins do a lot of pre-intimacy,kissing smooching,squeezing,touching and all,but avoid penetration.

2,she doesn't want to try out any solution,why because she is never ever looking forward to having great sex with u,meaning u just have to live with that.

Few pointed at the direction of her being a lesbian,truth is there is a chance she is.

Finally,I have dated girls in the past who at the initial stage does not enjoy sex,but guess what? They were all willing to try any solution available to make them enjoy sex,this is where the difference is between them and your wife.If your wife fancies you,she would be eager to source for a solution. Sex is great,sex is amazing,even in the animal kingdom e.g a Male lion would kill another contender all in the name of sex. A common cork would chase a hen from lagos to lokoja all in the name of sex.

Man up,sit your wife down,tell her as it is,if she is not willing to source for a solution you are ready to go extreme. STOP BEING A WEAKLING,UNLESS YOU CHOOSE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE WITH A SEX HANDICAP.

When she wasn't pregnant, she wouldn't allow you full penetration.

When she's pregnant she allows you full penetration.




Bros lemme ask you a question;
don't you have balls?

Are you a whimp?


Did she charm you or what?

She's clearly hiding something from you. That woman is evil.

So disgusting.
If it gets to it bro, I suggest you beat hell out of her. And she'll tell you the truth.

She's your wife for Christ's sake, you married her with your own money
Or
Did she marry herself?

Wake up from your slumber bro.

BE A MAN

kkkp:
I think your wife honey port is over stretched and she doesn't want u to know

#fact